13

Bella Swan/might have a crush on a stranger

I see my nurse walk past, and I hold my breath.

The group across the hall is so amusing that now I want to stay.

The charge nurse passes by, and two men exit Edward's room wearing frowns.

"It's bad. I can feel it," the older, blond version of Edward says.

"You have to think more positively, Carl," the guy in coach's gear tells him.

"Do you think he did this on purpose? Maybe we put too much pressure on him to go pro?"

"I CAN STILL HEAR YOU, AND I DIDN'T BREAK MY HAND INTO A MILLION PIECES TO TELL YOU SOMETHING I HAVE BEEN TELLING YOU FOR FOUR YEARS!" Edward yells.

Esme tries to shush him, but he isn't finished.

"Why am I the only one concerned about the fact that I can't masturbate anymore?"

I can't fight it anymore.

I laugh so loud and so hard I almost fall off the gurney.

Esme, I'm assuming, pokes her head out the door and glares.

Whoops.