A/N May 4, 2019: If you currently are reading this story, note that all chapters have been updated. See author's note for chapter 1.

Chapter 8: Looking in the rear mirror

JACK

Then he met her himself, although he did not know it was her at first. He and his team were working undercover in Nigeria, locating and surveilling a group of school girls that had been kidnapped by Boko haram, waiting for order to go in. Peanut had been posing as a drug lord and Jack as a mercenary working for him. Needless to say, Peanut had thoroughly enjoyed playing boss to his boss and taken every opportunity to boss around and make Jack perform errands for him. This afternoon, Jack had stopped by the road in a small village to get some water, when a boy started climbing the car. As he had to keep appearances up, Jack quite brutally threw the boy off the car saying he would snap him in half if he touched it again.

"Oi! What do you think you're playing at!?"

He turned around and was looking at... a dark little fairy, amazingly beautiful, petite yet strong-looking and angry as a bee. Next, he noticed the fatigues, the uniform of one of his fellow soldiers, but as the show had to go on he stepped towards her, threatening her.

"Why don't you run along, love, because you're gonna look mighty fucking silly putting your makeup on with a broken arm."

Inside he flinched at his own words, this was not how he liked to talk to any woman. She did not retreat an inch.

"If you were a man I would beat the shit out of you."

Her voice was kept low but feisty and he believed that she would really have liked to have a go at it, which he kind of would have liked to see even if he seriously doubted she would have succeeded.

"Really?" he challenged her.

Even if this was a fake fight for his part, he felt his pulse beat faster from an adrenaline rush. It was like he did not know if he wanted to slap her face or grab her and kiss her. Of course, he did neither. He had never hit a woman and as for kissing her, it would hardly have been professional. Probably not appreciated by her either.

"Corporal Lane, step away now!"

They were interrupted by none other than Captain James.

Unexpectedly seeing his old antagonist, Jack no longer had to pretend he was angry. How far did a man have to travel to get away from that idiot? Halfway around the Earth was obviously not far away enough. At least the jerk had the presence not to acknowledge him as a fellow officer, so he was smart enough to realise Jack was undercover. Jack did not utter another word, just eyed James and left them, fuming jumped into the four-by-four and drove off, leaving behind a dust cloud.

In the backseat Peanut, dressed the part as drug lord in t-shirt, big sun glasses and bling-bling, sat laughing so tears were running.

"Glad I'm able to amuse you", Jack said flatly.

"That was quite a show boss! Do you know who that was?"

"James you mean? I know bloody well, wish I didn't."

"No, her. Best girl there is, Corporal Georgie Lane. Elvis' girl you know. Or used to be."

So, this was the famous Georgie Lane. He should have understood as he had heard from Elvis she was under James' command.

"I thought they broke up?"

"Just had reconciled when he was killed. He died in front of her. She is a medic but couldn't save him after that bomb went off right in his face. Oh, how she cried at the funeral, I thought my heart would burst too."

Peanut was not laughing anymore, instead the eyes of the hardened soldier were filled with tears at the memory.

Jack felt a completely illogical sting of jealously. Illogical because Elvis was dead, illogical because she was nothing to him.

-OG-

Next time he saw her was at a Boko haram base only a few days later. He was there to discuss a presumptuous drug deal on behalf of his "boss", Peanut and spotted her at a distance just as she and a few others from the section were taken away. It was obvious they were prisoners and he was immediately filled with concern.

He appeared unmoved but cursed on the inside, knowing their lives were in immediate danger. He left as soon as he could without causing alarm and drove the miles to the camp where he now knew that 2 section were based. He was mad because saving them would blow up his carefully planned covert op, but he knew there was no alternative. They would not stay alive for long at the hands of Boko haram.

When he learned it had been an off-piste tour probably initiated by Corporal Lane, he was even more furious. Furious that the twat James was there and apparently unable to keep his men in line. He did not waste time or energy on his feud with James though. He knew they had to act fast while there was still someone left alive to save, so he put his anger aside and focused on that the task at hand.

Later that day they succeeded to extract the four captured British soldiers but had to leave behind the Nigerian army medic who was imprisoned with them. After a distraction manoeuvre involving an exploding van at the entrance of the Boko haram compound, Jack and his team blew up a hole in the wall of the cell where the hostages were held. Kingy, Rab and Maisie quickly followed their rescuers to the van, but Georgie first refused to Jack's dismay.

"I'm not leaving Ade Wally!" The Nigerian army medic was tied to a pole in the yard, where he had been badly beaten. Jack wanted to rescue him too but knew they were running out of time.

"Get into the truck now!"

"I'm not leaving without him!" she insisted.

"Our job is to extract you foreigners. Get into the truck NOW! GO!"

Damn woman, why couldn't she just obey orders? It was far too dangerous to stay there. As soon as the element of surprise was over, and they organized themselves, the Boko haram soldiers could outnumber them and then no one would make it out of there alive.

She followed him then, but the look in her eyes was one of contempt rather than one of gratefulness for being rescued. It made him immensely frustrated that she was so headstrong, but he had to admire her courage. He too hated leaving a man behind, no matter that he was not British Army. He was a human and had worked alongside with them and deserved to be rescued, but sometimes tough choices had to be made.

During the briefing afterwards, he took out his frustration on 2 section and especially her, as she had initiated the whole off-piste tour. James ended his part of the briefing by saying he was proud of the section and Monk spontaneously started clapping hands, relieved everyone was gathered again. Jack, who had stayed quiet at the back of the room up to then, brusquely interrupted him.

"What are you cheering for? You have achieved precisely nothing! Less than nothing because that Nigerian medic won't be cheering now", he spat.

"We never should have left him!" Georgie said, and he knew that her conscience must be heavier than the other's as it was her fault Ade Wally was at the Boko haram's men's mercy, but he thought she deserved it.

"This is what happens when you go off-piste, chaos follows. Chances are those kidnapped school girls will be sneaked away and never seen again. Our entire undercover operation has been blown, so clap that you fucking morons."

He saw that his words hit her hard, but this was not the time to be sympathetic. They had played with lives and needed to understand that and learn that there were consequences of not obeying orders. Oozing with fury he left them.

Later that evening, when he had calmed down he found her by the bedside of a captured, injured boy soldier they had in the provisional med centre. From a distance Jack watched her tend to him, unconcerned that the boy would willingly kill her if given half the chance. She looked tired but otherwise unaffected by the day's events. And beautiful. He wondered what she would look like with her hair down instead of the strict regulation bun. What she would look like without... 'Stop it Jack!', he told himself. 'She is one of the lads, nothing else.'

When she was ready attending to the boy, she came walking towards him and noticed he was standing there.

"I gather this was the second time you were being held hostage", he said.

"Occupational hazard I guess."

"Never happened to me."

"Well, it was my own fault" she admitted.

"Or Captain James'" he was still angry that James had not kept his men, and women, in check. If he had done his job as their CO this would not have happened, he had obviously slacked in discipline or no one would have the idea of going astray.

"We were at Sandhurst together" he said.

Why did he say that? Because he thought it would shock her? Because he wanted to impress her? He didn't know. Her reaction was anyway one of surprise.

"You were at Sandhurst?"

"Yeah, in the same regiment. Then I did SF selection while he stayed behind and played mother hen."

He was trying to impress her, just could not stop himself. Fuck.

"Do you just hate everyone? "

Impressing her clearly did not work very well.

"No. I liked Elvis."

Her saw her face change, but he did not know if it was because she would have preferred he did not know of it and maybe would pity her, or because he awoke the painful memory. Maybe both, and he regretted saying the words. Feeling he had to amend it somehow, he blurted out;

"And I quite like you too."

He had to turn around abruptly and leave because he felt his face turn hot, blushing like a school boy. What the hell! Why did he say that?

He did not like the presence of Georgie Lane one bit. It did strange things to his insides and made him behave even weirder. He was everything but pleased with himself as he crashed on his bed that night.

- OG -

The next twenty-four hours became more eventful than any of them had bargained for. They had planned to leave for Lagos next day, but at dawn a large group of Boko haram soldiers gathered outside the gate, shooting and shouting. It turned out the captured boy soldier was the leader's son and they were determined to get him back. The situation was grave, but Georgie came up with the idea to switch him for Ade Wally in a government-controlled area. That would both achieve getting them out of this situation and get Ade Wally back, without losing face by negotiating unduly with terrorists. It was brilliant, and he secretly admired her for thinking of it.

The exchange had worked out as planned, except for the last part. Ade Wally had been badly beaten and needed support walking to them during the exchange so a girl from the Boko haram group walked with him over the open plain where the exchange took place. In the last second, Ade Wally had managed to warn them that she had been equipped with a suicide vest under her voluminous clothes. During some dreadful minutes Jack, together with Fingers and Georgie, had prevented the girl from triggering the bomb, gotten the vest off and thrown it away just before it exploded. Miraculously, no one was injured. He had been impressed by the nerve and courage of both Fingers and Georgie, but meanwhile he saw Fingers close his eyes unable to look when he tried to disarm the explosives , she did not show the slightest shiver. When they had hit the ground, their feet knocked away by the blast and he asked if she was okay, she had barely seemed affected. She just got up, brushed herself off and said she was fine then started assessing the others like a pro medic. He had to admit Elvis had been right; he had never met a braver woman.

- OG -

When they finally reached the safe-haven of Lagos, an opportunity to take an evening off and go out to a bar, emerged for 2 section and everyone gladly grabbed it. Jack and his men were still on duty this last evening in Nigeria and sober they oversaw that everything went fine during the bar visit. The bar Slinkie's was popular among foreigners. There were other groups of soldiers and apparently a group of happy nurses who had many admirers among the lovesick men. Jack quite enjoyed watching the courtship game which was very obvious to him, seeing it all from above. He was standing up on a balcony watching over the dance floor when he saw her, dancing with Maisie. She was dressed in a simple white strap top and slacks. For the first time he saw her dark hair worn loose, longer than he had thought it to be, falling in soft waves over her shoulders and moving when she danced. And man, she could move... He was mesmerized. He realised after a while that he was doing a shit-job because the only one in the room who had his attention was she. He was not even sure he remembered to breathe.

When she came by them to say she had enough and was going back to barracks ahead of the rest of the section he offered her a lift. Partly because he wanted to keep her safe, partly because he was not ready to let go of her for the evening and like this he would get a few moments more. In the car. Alone. Shit.

They drove in silence. She seemed relaxed, but his senses were 100% alert. He noticed exactly how close her leg was to his in each moment, how she moved, her every breath. He did not recognise himself. This is crazy, he thought. I have got to do something. As they drove up to the gate outside barracks he had the brilliant idea that if he just slept with her he would get her out of his system, get rid of whatever this was.

"I've got this bottle of single malt in my single room and we could... share", he blurted out when he had stopped the car.

She let out a coarse little laugh.

"You actually couldn't sound creepier."

He knew he should let go, but he could not. His lips were moving and making sounds without his permission.

"Oh, come on. Time is short, why beat about the bush? Come tomorrow and you will never see me again."

"Yeah?"

She looked amused, not offended. That had to count for something.

"Well, I diffused a bomb and saved your life. What else has a guy got to do?"

"I can genuinely say, it's not you - it's me." she said and laughing again she jumped out of the car and walked off.

He sat there for a while, feeling deflated, like the biggest idiot on Earth. Pathetic attempt! Of course, there was not even the smallest chance she would say yes. At least, he told himself, she had no idea how he felt right now and that was a slight consolation. He started the car and headed back to the others.

When a drunk nurse later that night threw herself around his neck he did not push her away even if his interest in her was nil. Instead he brought her with him and in the morning ensured he was seen openly with her. As he had hoped, Georgie walked by at a distance and acknowledged them with a wave. Now she would for sure not think his proposal was anything more than a try to get laid, but it left a bitter taste in his mouth. He had achieved what he wanted. How come it felt so bad? He was relieved to leave Nigeria and her behind.