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Bella Swan/mammary glands
Heavy topics like the strength of my pelvic floor and having children turns into drunken giggling fits over whose nipples are weirder.
Yeah, no one said we're mature.
Alice has her shirt pulled over her head like Beavis, her bra pulled down, and she's trying very hard to look at her nipple.
But her boobs are practically nonexistent.
"Ugh. Take a picture of it for me."
"I'm not taking a picture of your tits, Ali. The Cloud is forever."
"There are far worse things on my phone than a boob. Just do it."
"No. Use your phone."
"It's all the way in my office," she whines.
We both look at her office.
It's a ways away.
A mere fifteen feet.
Still.
"Fine."
It takes ten tries until my wine-drunk brain manages to take a good pic.
We compare pictures, and Alice wins by far.
"Why is it shaped like that?" I ask, zooming in.
"My OB says that it's normal. Nipples are like snowflakes." She pouts.
"Okay ... we gotta figure out how we're getting home."