~Cifra~

Chapter Eight

-o-

Disclaimer: This story is purely fanfiction. Digimon and all its characters does not belong to me in anyway.

Warning: This story contains mature content and sexual themes. Please do NOT read unless you are 18 years or older.

Thank you so much for sticking around, for continuing to read and review my story. I am so blessed and honored by your support, it means so much to me! This chapter is dedicated to you, thank you so much.

-o-

I had a dream that night.

Rika was standing on the edge of a sky scraper, looking downward with fear and desperation in her eyes. Something or someone stood behind her, whispering in her ear. "If you kill him, I'll throw myself from this building," she said, over and over and over.

I fell out of bed screaming out her name.

Takato! Kyo called, leaping down beside me with shock on his face. What is it? What's wrong?

I could only lay there and tremble, feeling angry and helpless. I had no idea what her Erus was doing to her, especially since she had come to visit me against his will. Obviously, a dream was just a dream. But I had always had some kind of connection with Rika when I was dreaming. In the past, when it was something specific like that, my dreams were usually true.

"Sometimes I wonder if one of my ancestors was psychic or something," I groaned, finally pulling myself to my feet. I was still feeling weak, but most of my soreness and sickness was gone. I glanced at Kyo, studying him carefully. He appeared fine.

You were dreaming about Rika? He asked, frowning and looking up at me. His tail flicked from side to side impatiently. Do you think she's in danger?

"I do," I admitted, sighing. "But I think she's okay for now. What about you? How are you doing?" I lifted him into my arms, scratching his head and neck. "I'm worried about you."

I am fine. Quick healing, as you know. He looked away, accepting my petting regally. You're the weak human. You didn't even wake up when Satou came back with sushi. I ate all of it, of course.

"Of course," I mumbled, walking into the kitchen. I glanced at the clock, and saw that it was still early. I could probably make it to work today. "I'm going to get ready for work. Do you want anything to eat?" I hurried to shower, dress, and make us breakfast, and even made it in time to stop at the convenience store on the way to work. Kyo was characteristically quiet for most of it.

At work, he simply curled up on my desk and went to sleep. Which made me wonder if he really was feeling better or not. But I had work to do, and it was going to take me a long time to catch up. I spent the next several hours completely focused on my job.

"Ah, Matsuda-san?" someone asked, poking her head into my office near the end of the day. I looked up, seeing one of my female coworkers that I couldn't recall. "Nakamura-san would like you see you in his office before he leaves for the day."

"Thank you," I bowed my head as she left. Sighing tiredly, I stood and held out my arms. "Come on, Kyo," I said. "The last thing I want to do is go in there without you."

He looked up at me, smiling faintly. Yes, that would probably be prudent. I'm sure I already know what this is about.

"Another power play?"

Something like that, yes.

"You know, you get insufferably modest when you get strong," I mumbled, annoyed. "Why don't you just say it like it is? You're stronger than him now, right?"

He looked at me, a slight scowl upon his feline face. How can you tell? He asked, watching me.

"You glow more when you're strong," I shrugged. As I carried him toward the office, my grip tightened around him protectively. "You were a lot weaker before, but after these past few days, you've gotten strong quite suddenly." I paused, blush suddenly sweeping across my face. Probably because I…

Stop it, you're emitting energy right now. Do you want to tempt that Erus to fight me over you?

I sputtered a few nonsensical words, then continued forward in annoyance. "Whatever," I managed to mumble. "Let's just get this over with. Don't fight him, okay?"

I wont, I wont, Kyo chuckled. He purred, settling in my arms contentedly. I am saving my strength to save Rika. That's a promise.

I was much more confident this time, when I entered my boss's office and bowed at the entrance. "Please excuse my intrusion," I said politely. "You asked to see me?"

"Yes, Matsuda-san, please take a seat," my boss stammered. He wiped sweat from his forehead with his handkerchief, and watched me as I moved toward the chair, bowed respectfully, and seated myself into it. "Now then, I understand you were ill yesterday. Are you recovered yet?"

"Yes sir, thank you for your understanding." I bowed my head. On my lap, Kyo simply curled up with his back to the bird, pretending to go to sleep.

"Very good, very good…" he wiped his forehead again, looking nervous. "How should I put this? Let's see… It seems that I need you to watch my bird for a short while. I need to go on an errand, and I can't just leave him with anyone. You see? Do you mind?"

I looked up at him, feeling a sudden tension filling the room. What was he saying? Leave me alone with that thing?

Kyo remained unmoving upon my lap, as though he didn't care. When I didn't get any kind of instruction from him, I knew that he was telling me it was fine.

Right?

"I-I would be honored," I bowed my head. But I felt sick to my stomach.

"Thank you," he said, standing from his chair. He turned to look at his shoulder, and the bird hopped off of him, landing on the desk below. "I shall return in a short while, then. Thank you again." Bowing his head, he left the room at a rapid pace.

I swallowed, turning to look at the bird with an uneasy expression. What could it possibly want?

It appears that I require your assistance, the bird suddenly declared, preening its feather with an indifferent expression on its face.

Too stunned to know what to saw, I just waited. He probably senses that Kyo is stronger than him now. That's why he's being so polite. But why not send me out as well? Why just his own Cifra?

As if reading my mind—or perhaps he knew it was time to speak up—Kyo turned around, sitting up straight and fixing the bird with his eyes. Speak your mind, Lyra.

The bird ruffled his feathers, as though not quite sure how to take the compliment. You may have noticed the changes that are taking place. The Erus who have disregarded the rules and do as they please.

I have, Kyo nodded.

And are you gathering strength because of them?

I glanced back and forth between them, silent. Again, I wondered why I was here, when Nakamura-san was not. Did they trust me with this kind of information, when they didn't trust him? No, they need me for something, I decided.

I have promised to help Takato save his true love from one of them, Kyo said quietly. His tone held only a hint of sadness, but I could pick it up. That is why I am gathering strength.

The bird nodded, but it seemed disturbed. That is a little strange, Erus. Your behavior is not normal since coming to this planet either.

This planet is quite different, isn't it? Humans are amazing creatures. Kyo purred slightly, before suddenly growing quite serious. They have the capacity to bring great evil, or to show great love. Some Erus are affected by it in a negative way. Others, like myself, are lucky. We find someone who can show us what love means.

I see. The bird glanced at me, watching me with unblinking eyes. Your name is Matsuda, correct?

"Yes," I nodded. "Matsuda Takato. Pleased to meet you."

Matsuda, you have brought great strength to your Erus quite suddenly. It is unlike anything I have ever seen or heard of before. Because of that, I think that you should be careful. Many Erus will seek to steal you. I myself, am tempted by you. However, I am not foolish. I know when I will win a battle, and when I will lose. He paused, looking back at Kyo regally. You have always shown me great respect, Lyra. Allow me to finally repay you the courtesy. If you should ever come to a battle that might weaken you to the point that another Erus could come and defeat you afterwards, come to my territory. I will protect you. In return, I ask that you continue as you have done before.

I glanced down at Kyo watching him. It made sense to have a back up plan, or an ally, in case he was targeted by more than he could handle. I was grateful for the offer.

You want me to continue to respect your authority? Kyo purred, his tone amused.

The bird went back to preening its feathers, as though flustered. And continue to allow Matsuda to work here. He is very good at his job.

I laughed, startling both of them. "Don't worry," I said cheerfully. For some reason, I was too relieved to really think about being cautious, and I simply acted like I normally would. Holding my hand out for the bird to step on my fingers, I smiled down at him kindly. "Kyo is very generous, and he doesn't go back on his word. If he told you that he would respect you, even if he became the strongest Erus alive, he wouldn't pick a fight with you. That's just not like him."

Almost as though he didn't understand why he was doing it, the bird hopped onto my fingers. But he was a bird. If you had the right attitude, birds would always hop onto your fingers if you invited them. Lifting him up, I gently stroked his head with one finger, and scratched his cheeks the way birds love to be scratched. It made him even more bewildered.

"Thank you for your kind offer. We appreciate it. In return, you let us know if you need help too, alright?" I glanced down at Kyo, grinning at his annoyed and jealous face. "Right Kyo?"

He huffed, turning away indignantly.

"Kyo agrees," I chuckled. Carefully, I set the bird back onto the desk, and stood from my chair. I held Kyo in my arms as I bowed and headed for the door. "Take care of Nakamura-san," I said quietly, before slipping out. "He is a good man, and he's very smart about business. He will lead this company to greatness, so please support him as best you can. He really cares about you too, I can tell." Bowing once more, I left the room and headed back to my cubicle.

You gave him much to think about, Kyo said, staying on my lap even after I continued to work at my computer. You are very hard to resist, Takato.

"I know," I smirked. "And I'm terrible. I always use it to get what I want."

You're right, he huffed, settling on my lap. You are terrible. Several minutes later, he lifted his head with a start. Ah, that's right, I meant to ask you. Earlier you said something about me glowing more. What did you mean by that?

"Didn't you know?" I asked, still watching my screen as I crunched numbers in the computer. "You began to glow when you have more power stored up in you. It's not like a visible light, though, it's more like something that can be felt." I paused, smiling awkwardly. "Does that make sense?"

He scowled at me, watching me like he was completely confused once more. No, he said at length. Not at all. Erus do not glow.

"Yes you do."

No, we don't.

"You always glow, every time you use magic. All of you do."

NO! He suddenly yelled, leaping off my lap and landing on top of my computer. He stared at me, his eyes wide with shock. No, Takato, we do not glow. If you see something like that, then you are seeing something that no one else can see, not even Erus. Something like that… an ability like that…. His voice trailed off, and his face was conflicted with worry. It's almost like magic.

"Hey, why are you so worried?" I asked, lifting him up and holding him in my arms. I nuzzled his nose with mine, trying to calm him down. "I've always been different, okay? That's just me. It's not magic, it's intuition. Humans all have different gifts, and different ways to sense things. That's just how we are." I paused, thinking about my words carefully. "Maybe that's why humans are the first Cifras that you can take the shape of. We also have the capacity to be greater than our limits."

I don't understand. Kyo lowered his head, and rested it against my chest. He seemed so small, so confused, it made me want to protect him. I have lived for so many thousands of years, and been to four different worlds. But for the first time, I feel like I don't know anything.

"That's what it means to be alive," I chuckled. "I've told you this before, right? Besides, the day we stop learning and growing is the day we die. There is always something more to be gained. Keep an open mind, alright?"

I continued to work, but he remained on my lap, his head against my chest, until we were the only ones left in the building.

When we left for home, he still would not look at me in the face.

-o-

"I made fish," I said cheerfully, setting his plate in front of him and sitting down on the couch. I turned on the TV, letting out a sigh of relief. "Man, I am still really exhausted. I feel like my body is dying! I can't remember the last time I felt like this. Was it after I first started learning martial arts with Henry? Yeah… I think that's the last time."

Kyo ate his fish silently, not even acknowledging me. When he was finished, he hopped onto the couch and curled up on my lap.

I stroked his back absently, focused on the show, until the half hour was up. It was a cooking show—one I really enjoyed—but it always made me want to try new dishes. It was the kind of show that I secretly loved, but would never, NEVER, tell anybody that I watched. Except for Rika. She like to tease me, but when I opened up to her about something I liked, she always took it seriously.

I turned off the TV with a sigh, wishing I had the ingredients to try out that side dish. It looked really good.

"Hey Kyo," I yawned, running my fingers down his soft spine lethargically. "Do you feel as exhausted as I do?"

He huffed, peering up at me with one eye. I couldn't help marveling how green and intense his eyes were. I feel terrible, he snapped. And it's all your fault. How can you move so easily?

I grinned. "It's a taste of your own medicine, you know. Maybe now you'll feel bad for me when you cipher tons of energy from me."

I'm not talking about that, I'm talking about my back. I'm never letting you do that to me again!

"Ah…that…." I blushed, looking away quickly. "Yeah…sorry about that. It's your fault, though."

You keep saying that. He stood, stretching himself in a very cat-like pose, and then sat up so he could scowl in my face. His eyes were wide, swirling with confusion. Takato, I need you to tell me clearly. Why did you do it? Why would you do that if you're in love with Rika? I am an Erus, and I cipher energy from you by making you feel good. But I am not… even if I can take that form, I am not human. He lowered his head, not looking at me. So why would you do that to me? Now I… I don't know what to…

I didn't know what to say either. Helplessly, I looked away from him, staring up at the ceiling and wishing I could say something—anything!—to make sense of it.

But I couldn't.

Do you love Rika?

I cringed. "Yes," I whispered.

Do you love me?

My eyes squeezed shut painfully. "Yes." My voice broke, faltering as my emotions swarmed my chest with a feeling of anxiety.

Then look at me.

It took a great deal of effort to lower my head and meet his eyes. I was frozen by his power, unable to move. I don't even know what I want anymore.

Takato, even after we save Rika, I will still be here. I am your Erus. But…

But he'll never be with me, not like that. I nodded, my lips pressed together firmly. "I see," I whispered. Why did that make me so frustrated? Why did I feel so depressed? Why do I love him? It's so annoying!

You can't have us both like that. It's better this way.

"I know that!" I snapped. The anger in my voice caught me off guard, and I covered my mouth in surprise. Cringing, I hung my head and squeezed my eyes shut. "Don't you think I know that? Even so… when I try to sort out my feelings, I can't even tell what I want. I'm terrible, I know. Terrible to myself, terrible to you, to Rika…"

He bit me, causing me to yelp in surprise and pain. When I looked at him in alarm, he scowled at me with such fury, it made me afraid. What is wrong with you? He demanded. Why are you doing this? I've already promised to bring back your love to you. Stop getting confused!

"How can I help it?" I yelled back at him. "I can't help it! It's because of you I'm like this!"

What do you want me to do? He demanded. Suddenly, light enveloped him, and with his human form, he pushed me onto my back on the couch. He was on top of, his feline eyes burning with a hundred emotions.

Just the feel of his hands pressing me down made my heart race and my face flush.

What do you want me to do? He demanded once more. Are you going to force me to make you choose? You can't have us both, Takato. Not like that. It isn't fair.

I shuddered, turning my face away from him. I knew that my body was already turned on, and I could see the transfer of energy as he sucked it up into himself, automatically. "You're right," I murmured, feeling ashamed of myself. "I'm being cruel. I… I'm sorry, Kyo. Sorry…"

He hung his head, unable to look at me. Even his arms and back were trembling. "So this is how it is for you," he whispered, laughing cynically. "The rush of feelings, emotions, and urges. They're so strong…"

I didn't know what to say. I'd been human all my life. It was normal to feel that way when you were tuned on. When you loved someone.

"When I think about doing this, feeling this way with anyone else, it means nothing." He looked at me, his eyes holding me in place, drinking in my expression. "I don't even want to consider it. But when I see your face… my chest… hurts."

I grimaced. I wanted to touch him, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. That would make this so much worse. "That's love," I said quietly. "The heart decides things on it its own. Didn't you know?"

He shook his head, his arms still trembling.

"It's how humans are. We have three centers of consciousness, my dad used to say." I closed my eyes, concentrating on my breathing. If I just relaxed, I could turn it off. I could move past this. Right? "The Mind thinks things through on the surface. We interpret information with our mind, make conscious decisions, and reason things out. It's what makes us learn and grow. That is the first center of consciousness."

Kyo leaned closer to me. The rapid pace of my heart was calling him, and he could not resist absorbing the energy I was creating with my body heat. Slowly, he lowered his face to my neck and poised there, trembling. What are the other two?

I shuddered when his lips touched the nape of neck. "Th-the second one is in our Gut. We have even more nerve clusters there than in our brain, you know. It's the gut that uses instinct to decipher things that are mysteries. We can sense danger, truth, lies, and gain understanding by pondering things in the pit of our gut. It is the subconscious part of us, the part that learns wisdom."

I have never heard of this. His kisses trailed further down, tracing my collarbone. He was unable to stop himself from continuing, and the glow of energy around him grew brighter.

Cringing as his magic elicited more pleasure through my nerves, I found myself reaching up and clinging to him. I couldn't have stopped myself if I tried. "The last one is the Heart. It is the center of emotion, and deep decision. The heart loves, fears, and yearns to be complete. It decides things all on its own, without any concern for reason or wisdom. Against our wishes, it often puts us in great pain because it chooses to love when it would be better for it to be cold." I gasped, shuddering when he nipped my skin with his teeth. "It's because of the heart that we can be stronger than our limits. But if the heart breaks…it can lose all hope of life."

I don't want your heart to break.

"I don't want your heart to break either," I whispered in his ear. Next thing I knew, I was kissing it, feeling a rush of emotion and excitement when he moaned deep in his throat. "That's why, I don't know what I want."

He pulled back, staring into my face with conflicted eyes. "Your heart tells you that you love me," he said.

I nodded, and inwardly cursed my eyes for growing so blurry.

"But your heart also loves Rika, even though your mind is telling you that you can only have one of us."

I nodded once more.

"So you need me to decide for you."

Suddenly frozen with dread, I blinked away the tears that had been filling my eyes, staring up at him. What is he saying?

"I think it's time then," he said. He pulled away, leaving me lying stunned on the couch. His face turned away from me, staring out the window. "I am strong enough now. It is time to rescue Rika."

"Wait…Kyo…"

"After that…I will leave."

"Kyo! What are you saying?"

He looked back at me, smiling painfully. "Isn't that the way it is meant to be? It's alright. I will wander the world again. I will find someone else. But you will never find another Rika. Isn't that true?"

"Kyo…" I sprang to my feet. "You can't just leave me!"

"You won't need me anymore." His face grew serious. Cold. Like all emotion suddenly vanished from him. His body enveloped in light, and he shrank into his housecat form. You'll have Rika. Ignoring my words, he ran into my bedroom, diving under the bed and hiding there.

I was too stunned to know what to think. I feel like I'm losing everything! I thought. But all I could do was lay on the couch with my arms over my face, and grit my teeth till it hurt. My face burned with tears.

-o-

So much drama. I laugh to myself; At myself.

Shorter chapter this time, but this was the best stopping point before the next part starts. What do you think so far?

~Rukatofan