Chapter 9

Vermilion Lake

6:50pm

Sam immediately helped them carry Charlie's seemingly lifeless body out of the dark cold water and gently laid her down on the pebbled beach. She lay motionless on the ground; her soaked hospital gown clinging desperately to her body.

Dean, dripping wet himself, hunched over her immediately checking for a pulse on her neck. "Charlie?" He waited a few moments but couldn't find a pulse. He then checked her wrist. "Charlie..?" His voice trembled. "I can't.. I can't find a pulse." He stuttered.

"Dean, move!" Jody commanded.

"Dean.. " Sam gently tugged on Dean's jacket motioning him to move away from Charlie.

Jody dropped to her knees and hunched over her. She tilted the young woman's chin upward and put her ear to her mouth listening carefully. She felt nothing. She watched for Charlie's chest to rise and fall. Nothing. Jody pulled a few strands of wet hair away from Charlie's mouth and put her lips over them and immediately began CPR.

Sam and Dean watched in horrified silence as Jody began to perform C.P.R. She blew in two breaths of air into Charlie's mouth and then counted thirty chest compressions. She repeated this procedure systematically checking for breathing each time. This went on for a few agonizing minutes.

"Come on, come on, come on.." Dean chanted under breath. After a few more minutes, Charlie still hadn't responded to the CPR and Jody was starting to show fatigue. Sam motioned to Jody that he would take over. He positioned himself as she finished off her two breathes on Charlie, then quickly moved aside so Sam could take over.

Jody slowly stood up beside Dean. Her adrenaline was at an all time high. She grasped for Dean's shaky fingers with her own. They dared not look at eachother fearing that if they took their eyes off of Charlie for even one second she would die right there in front of them. So instead, they stood side by side chilled to the bone by the cold night air and stared helplessly at the silhouetted forms of Sam's body hunched over Charlie's.

After another long agonizing minute Charlie's body suddenly flinched and a gurgling sound came from her throat and water sputtered out from her mouth. Dean dropped to his knees to help Sam turn her to her side where she continued to cough and gasp for several more minutes.

"Thank god.. " Jody said more loudly than she had anticipated.

Sam supported Charlie's shaking body feeling a sense of instant relief. He couldn't believe it. He thought for sure they had lost her. He looked over to Dean who looked as relieved as he felt. Actually, Dean looked elated.

"Charlie?" Dean said his bottom lip quivering. "You ok?" After a few more coughs she slowly nodded. Jody wasted no time in gathering their jackets and layering them over Charlie. It was a bone deep cold out, and undoubtedly shock would be setting in soon if it hadn't already. When Jody was finished, Sam started to lift Charlie up.

"No! No. Stop!" Charlie urged. "Just wait... " She looked back to the lake behind her, eyes scanning the surface of the water, searching for something. Then she closed her eyes for a long moment as her body began to shake uncontrollably. "They're together." She whispered "Finally together." Charlie said with a mixture of joy and sadness.

"Sam.. " Dean said indicating they should leave now but Charlie pushed Sam away when he tried to pick her up again.

"No! No, I don't want to leave! Please!" Charlie pleaded. "He's my boy too!" She yelled. The three of them were taken back by the force of the comment. It was Jody who took the lead and knelt down beside her.

"Charlie.. Charlie.. "Jody said in a motherly tone as she pulled Charlie back towards her. "Hey, honey, look at me." Jody waited patiently until Charlie finally and reluctantly looked up to her. "Like you said, they're together now. You helped them find their way to eachother. But Charlie.. honey.. "

Charlie was already shaking her head.".. no.. no.." She didn't want to hear what Jody had to say.

Jody gently cupped Charlie's cheek in the palm of her hand, ".. they are gone. Your part here is done. It's ok to let go. You have to let go."

Charlie looked back to the lake with tears in her eyes. Her brain understood that. Her heart on the other hand ached desperately for something that had never been hers. But the devastation she now felt was as real for her as it had been for Jessica. She felt it in every bone in her body. She could not separate from it.

"Charlie.." She heard Dean say. She looked up to his pleading eyes. ".. please..let us help you now."

Charlie squeezed her eyes shut shaking her head. She was incredibly torn. She felt anguish. So much anguish. She wanted nothing more than to run back into that lake and feel that peace Jessica and her child now felt. She ached for it just like Jessica did. ".. no..I..I.." Charlie stuttered as she tried to get up.

"Charlie... " Jody said gently.

Charlie quieted for a moment when she caught sight of her clothes and suddenly became aware of the throbbing pain eminating from her stomach, that in turn made her aware of something else; the burning sensation in her wrists, and the blood that stained them. She suddenly was acutely aware of her own physical pain. She hadn't realized the damage her body had sustained. And it was in that very moment that she was reminded of who she was. Charlie, not Jessica.

Her voice shook heavily as she spoke. "I'll go." She nodded to Sam. He lifted her up carefully and then followed Jody back to the cars with Dean taking up the rear.

Charlie looked back to the dark waters behind her one more time before she buried her face into Sam's shirt. She felt completely lost and utterly grief stricken. Her heart felt heavy in her chest. It left her with the baring weight of undeniable exhaustion. In an attempt to shut everything out she closed her eyes. Unbenounced to her though, she succeeded in making everything go away for the time being and fell asleep within moments.