Chapter 2: Counterattack!

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"Hey, Ozzy- don't you think Alana and Dylan have been acting strange lately?" frowned New Zealand at his brother.

"What do ya mean Kyle?" asked Australia not looking up from his phone.

"Dyl has been shifty and Alana won't stop smirking… They're up to something again Keith and I'm both terrified and curious… Are you listening to me?" snapped Kyle grabbing the phone causing Keith to shriek.

"Give it back Kyle!" whined a panicking Keith.

"Huh, these are cute… Hey Keith, why do you have an album full of pics of us and mum?" asked Kyle, going through the pictures and chuckling at a few and frowning at others. Keith was blushing madly and stuttering incoherently, so Kyle ignored him.

He always ignores him when he's being stupid.

"Ohohoho what do we have here~" sniggered Kyle and Keith attempted to steal back the phone- and failed.

"Now, what would dear old mum say if he found this~" giggled Kyle.

"Shut up Kyle! Give it back- you wouldn't dare and never laugh like that again! You sound like the frog!" Keith yelled, pushing his brother and grabbing back the phone.

"Do I have your attention now?" chuckled Kyle, amused by his discovery of… that on his brothers phone. My, my Keith was such a naughty boy~

"Yes, yes just don't tell mum!" blushed Keith.

"Mums the word, so to speak" grinned Kyle with a wink.

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"Why are you acting like the twins? What was it you wanted to say anyway?" grumbled Keith and the two resumed their positions on their red couch.

"I think the isles are up to something involving mum and I want to find out what…" said Kyle simply.

"If it involved mum, I'm in. Besides just grill Dyl, he crumbles under pressure," replied Keith.

"Great idea!" beamed Kyle, speed dialling his uncle.

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"Hnnnn Sheeeep" mumbled Dylan, tossing and turning in his warm and comfy bed. Then, his phone rang- his ringtone? Love Story by Taylor Swift, 2008.

A song about forbidden love- coincidence? I think not.

"We were both young when I first saw you

I close my eyes

And the flashback starts

I'm standing there

On a balcony in summer air"

Dylan woke up and groggily grabbed his phone.

" 'lo?" he mumbled, snuggling into his pillow.

"Heya Uncle Dyl" came the sickly sweet voice of Kyle from his phone. Dylan frowned, his "nephew" wanted something.

"What do you want Kyle?" he sighed.

"What is North planning~" giggled Kyle and Dylan cursed, they would ruin everything but… sleep is so tempting…

Hnnnn

"To set Arthur up with someone, now… hnnn sleeeeep." Said Dylan.

"Goodnight uncle Dyl~ Sweet dreams~" giggled Kyle but Dylan was already fast asleep, counting sheep in a dreamland field.

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Kyle giggled hysterically, a murderous aura growing and Keith sweat dropped. This wouldn't end well for Arthur or Kyle.

"W-well?" he asked apprehensively.

"He said Auntie Eire is trying to set Arthur up with someone~" said Kyle with a deceptively cheerful smile.

"Fuck! Why?" hissed Keith, shocked and Alana's audacity.
"Who cares~ Arthur is mi- ours." Giggled New Zealand and Australia rolled his eyes, he had finally lost it but… England WAS theirs and Australia would gladly kill anyone who got close to his mum.

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All the colonies gathered at Australia's house, enraged at the idea of losing their mum/dad/brother to anyone.

But… They were also tempted to set their parents up again…

"He should marry Antonio- or better yet Uncle Joao!" yelled Gibraltar.

"No way! Jerk England can marry Sweden!" called Sealand.

"Nu-uh he can marry Ozzy! Their perfect!" smirked Wy.

"… China" said Leon (HK)

"All right, all right! Everyone quiet! Our mission is to protect England from the nations who will hit on him!" cheered Kyle, emitting a death aura so everyone immediately obeyed without question…

Except India.

"Why should we have to protect him" he grumbled sulkily (England didn't answer his text and he missed their high tea date.)

"Do you want someone else to have him, mate? China? Spain? France?" asked Keith with a raised eyebrow.

All the colonies collectively shivered.

"No way" hissed Canada, his eyes flaring (and everyone suddenly noticed him and were terrified)

"He's ours" agreed Kyle with a beaming smile.

"Now… Let's protect mum!" cheered Keith.

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Arthur frowned, he suddenly had a feeling that he shouldn't go to the next meeting. It put him off his tea, he sighed and put down his cup and tried to read his book.

God, why does this sort of thing always happen to him?

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