So I know I've been out for a loooooooooong time, and I'm super sorry about that but I came bearing good news! First, I am now officially a Registered and Licensed PSYCHOMETRICIAN! AAAAHHHH THANK YOU EVERYONE WHO WISHED ME LUCK AND PRAYED FOR ME! Thank you soooo damn much, you don't know much those gave me strength. The exam took a toll on me which is why I had to take a few days off from writing, but now yours truly is a certified Psychometrician and that is all thanks to your support! Thank you sooo much. Second good news is, for those who live in the Philippines, I will be at the 2018 Yuri on Ice Convention, we will be hanging around in the artist alley! I'll probably be selling a few artworks there and if you have any more suggestions feel free to leave it on a review.

Ahahahaha so yeah thank you guys and now we have Chapter 33! Last chapter got as a very furious Kuroko and a very infuriating mother on the side. And since it's Furihata's birthday yesterday, we will have a Akafuri centered chapteeeer!

Please don't forget to leave a review or fav or follow! I missed you soooo much guys!

ps. additional notes found in below

Chapter 33: Karakuri Pierrot

Akashi purse his lips as he tries to supress the dull pain in his head. His head feels as if it is cracking in two, as if his soul is being torn off from his own body. The sound of the staff behind him is drowned in static noises produced by his head. This has been going on for exactly two days and it is not even funny. The way his head swims at the thought of the brunet drummer is not funny, the way his voice somehow lingers in the back of his head and the way his eyes glimmer in his memory doesn't really help. He couldn't sleep without dreaming about him, which he hates to admit, he doesn't understand why. Of course yes he is interesting but why does his heart ache whenever he thought of demise falling to that boy?

He could care less about Kuroko's anger for him, he knew the moment Kuroko left the band before he resented him. He wants Kuroko to leave his band and to realize he couldn't be without any of the Miracles, he wanted him to suffer for leaving them.

But right then all of those thoughts were thrown out of the window as Kuroko told him about the brunet.

Akashi cringes at the memory again, Furihata's mother, why does the name and image seem awfully and painfully familiar?

This is stupid, he shouldn't be bothered by such trivial thing yet he is.

His hand reaches to the side of his head to nurse the dull pain there. What is happening to him, he feels as if there is this nagging sensation, like an itch for him to reach out, go see that brunet, hear from him that things are alright. It didn't make sense because he should not care, he shouldn't but he does.

He does and he hates it.

He hates the power the brunet has over him like an invisible string attached to him pulling him, tugging his heart.

"Akashi-san, are you alright?"

Akashi raises his head to meet the eyes of one of his staff, the woman wears a worried expression but it does not fool him. They were merely saying this because they work for him. His eyebrows furrow and he tries to stand straight.

"Leave me." he says coldly.

The woman blinks but thankfully Akashi gets his message across and the woman nods before leaving him. He stays in his spot as the rest of the staff finish whatever the hell they were doing. Rakuzan records are slowly being threatened by Seirin's hottest bands, Hikari no Ou rises way too quickly than he anticipated, none of their boy groups could trample come par with the band. Their lone artist including himself is still on top but it wouldn't be long until their status will be challenged as well by the dark horse of the music industry.

They are starting to device contingency plans for this, if worse comes to worst Akashi would have to take the things in his hand and return as an active artist.

"We still have Miyako-chan on top three so I guess that's good."

Akashi blinks at the name. Miyako, why does it somehow…rings a bell. Akashi turns to the small crowd of staff discussing in a hush as a photoshoot unveils in front of them. He walks to them and his big and obvious presence quickly felt. The group turns to him and smiles.

"A-Akashi-san we were—"

"Miyako, that artist we had her since when?"

The group exchanges look and turn to him before one of them answers.

"Since five years now sir."

Akashi is quiet for a moment before he speaks again, "Her mother was a music teacher yes?"

"Uh…yes." Another one answers.

Akashi is quiet for a moment. Miyako…wasn't her real name…

Akashi's eyes widen and a frown settles in his lips, he feels anger bubbling in his chest. Miyako never told anyone about Furihata so why is her mother trying to get the brunet now? Disgust over the thought of what may be the reason made Akashi see red. His headache throbs again making him groan and almost fall forward. He hears the collective gasps of the staff but he pushes their hands away. He mutters something under his breath that he doesn't even catch himself.

The world starts to spin, he tries to get out of the studio, he have to get out of there and see those two, he need to tell them to stay the hell away from Furihata. He opens the door out and the light of the hallways almost blinded him. His eyes are hazy and he hears the distant voice of Mebuchi but he doesn't turn. He continues to walk.

"Sei-chan!" Mebuchi exclaims as he sees the scarlet haired musician staggering on the hallway like zombie. Mebuchi gasps a couple of times as Akashi almost tripped with his own feet.

Worry overpowers his fear for the other's anger and he decides to check on the other, however he finds him stopping. Akashi with his back facing Mebuchi freezes, he doesn't move making Mebuchi himself stop. Then from staggering he finds Akashi standing straight up, he sees his shoulder relaxes as he breathes in and exhales.

"S-Sei-chan?"

He doesn't answer and so Mebuchi decides to approach the other, to his surprise he doesn't feel the usual aura from the other, instead it is lighter almost unfamiliar to him.

"Mebuchi."

Mebuchi blinks, wow, he starts to debate internally if he should start calling a priest or is his hearing playing tricks with him.

"Y-Yes, Sei-chan?"

Akashi raises his head and turns to face Mebuchi and there it is, both his eyes are red making Mebuchi's eyes almost pop out of his head.

"What do you think about street performances?"

.

.

.

.

.

Kuroko smiles at the sight before him, Furihata seems to enjoy the fluff of fur in his lap, the four month old husky kicks his little paws in the air as the brunet tickles his stomach. It's very cute and endearing. Kuroko snaps a picture of the brunet and posts it in his social media before putting a simple caption, I think he likes Furihata-kun more. As soon as he posts the picture his phone vibrates with notification praising how Furihata looks so gentle with animals while some were asking when did Kuroko got the puppy.

Nigou is actually a gift from Kagami, he'd probably tell that to their fans later. Despite Kagami's fear towards them he thought Kuroko would need a dog in his home, especially that he lives alone. Kuroko wouldn't complain, he loves dogs and Nigou is so adorable. The tiny fluff ball has his eyes too which is very amusing—disturbing according to Kagami but he could care less.

More importantly, Kuroko is simply happy things are well for now even after the whole deal with Furihata's mother. He knows someone like her wouldn't stop simply from convincing Furihata, but for now they'll take this peace. Kuroko sits down beside the two and quietly moves to turn on the television. He avoids the news and turns to some anime show instead, he doesn't particularly pay attention but this is alright he thought.

As Kuroko's mind start to flutter to the thousand questions in his head, he finds himself settled in one.

"Furihata-kun." He starts, Furihata turns to him with a smile. "I hope you don't mind me asking but…about Akashi-kun."

Furihata blushes at the mention of the name, though Furihata blushes easily there is something that told Kuroko this one is different.

"W-What about Akashi-san?"

"Do you know each other?"

"I…" Furihata's hand stops stroking Nigou's fur, the puppy whines at the loss of contact and Furihata settles with patting him. "Somehow…but not really, i-it's hard to say."

"What do you mean?"

Furihata takes a deep breathe, he hasn't really told Kuroko about his family. He has the right to know after all the kindness he's given him, all those concern and care.

"I have musical dyslexia, I can't really read musical notes which is weird for a kid with both parents who are musical prodigies. My brother and sister isn't like me so I…my parents didn't understand why I am like this." Furihata says in a soft voice, his eyes cast down on Nigou's exposed belly. "I was homeschooled because my parents were scared that people will start asking question. I was told that as long as possible I don't tell anyone about my last name. Then…one day there was a kid, he was tutored by my mother to play the violin. I listened to him play secretly and I learned that I can play by memorizing music by the sound itself. That boy…I didn't knew his name really, all I know is that he is called Sei."

Kuroko blinks. How awful, his stomach churns at the thought of Furihata's parents. He had an idea about their relationship, and he hated the way Furihata's mother only sought him recently when he rose to the limelight. He thought they don't deserve to even see Furihata right now, after they have thrown him out like an unwanted kitten.

"Akashi-kun took a lesson to a famous musician when he was a child but I didn't know him then." Kuroko says, "Is that…"

"Yes." Furihata nods, "I didn't recognized him at first he…changed but something made me sure of that it's just that…"

Kuroko doesn't press anymore. Something tells him Furihata can't say freely the reason and probably it is something personal.

"But…he might not really remember me anymore." Furihata says with a sad smile.

"I would like to believe Akashi-kun is not as bad as much as I take him for." Kuroko says making Furihata look at him. "When I met him, though he is distant and sometimes cold, he could also be kind, gentle and understanding. Sometimes I would like to think that he simply has his unique ways of showing how he feels towards others. When things fell apart he tried desperately to piece things back together, I didn't understand him then, but I do now.

When we have something we fear of losing we struggle to keep it, sometimes we lose our mind trying to preserve what was left, trying to salvage what can be salvaged. Sometimes we become too desperate we forget about other things. I didn't have anything worth calling mine then, I knew that Aomine-kun didn't like me the way I liked him, I knew Kise-kun loves Aomine-kun and Midorima-kun would follow Akashi-kun's orders, and Murasakibara-kun could care less. I drifted and I felt detached, when Akashi-kun tried to hold me down I felt even more suffocated and more eager to leave. I was angry when he did those things to me, I loathed him and blamed him from the trauma and misery that the day left him."

There was silence between them for a while until Kuroko speaks again.

"I understand him now and I want to keep that, I want to fix the things I left before so I could move on and settle with what I have now. But…I just…" Kuroko sighs. He looks up at Furihata his usual blank expression is filled with a mix of worry and compassion. "I understand him enough to know I don't want anything bad to happen to the ones I care about, that I am willing to destroy that one thing that comes in the way of the people I care. But I care about him too."

Furihata smiles and nods at the Kuroko's words. His heart swells at the warm words of the teal haired musician. He may not had a family who accepted him for what he is, but this thing right here, what he has with his bandmates is enough to compensate for that.

"Furihata-kun do you trust Akashi-kun?"

There was a brief silence before Furiahata nods. He puts his hand in his chest, he is unsure of the things right now, but he knows he could very much at least trust Akashi. He doesn't know how he knew this despite probably knowing that the Akashi they usually see is not the Akashi he met. But maybe, just maybe, he still wish to see him, maybe at the back of his mind he's there waiting, that boy with the eyes that reflected the sunset.

Kuroko smiles and nods back.

"I trust you." Kuroko says in a quiet voice, "I may not fully trust Akashi-kun now but I do trust you, I trust your conviction."

"Thank you." Furihata says quietly.

Kuroko smiles, for a long while he was filled with mistrust to people around him, everyone felt like they could stab him the moment he turn his back but since he met Takao, Kagami and Furihata things changed. He felt safe to trust again. It is as if he could be alright again, like he knows somewhere someone will be behind him holding him, pushing him forward. It feels like family again. He feels as if things could get better.

….

Furihata turns his head towards his reflection against the glass of a turned off vending machine. His usual light make up is washed off from his face revealing his plain features—well their makeup artist is great but no makeup could actually make his face look any better, he tells himself. He blushes as he thought of Kagami, Kuroko and Takao in their usual studio get up look, they all look cool while he looks like an accidental variable there.

Kuroko insisted to call a cab for him back to his apartment but Furihata declined the offer. He wanted some time for himself, time to think about things. Sighing into his scarf and blowing a warm air through the fabric, Furihata reaches down to his pocket and takes out his phone. Afteer turning the camera app he quickly finds himself with a several notifications from an unfamiliar yet familiar caller ID. It wasn't registered to his phone yet he knows it, his mother.

There were several missed calls and messages. He decides to look at the messages, she hasn't given up convincing him to leave the band and sign up for another records. He truly wanted this, a day when his mom would finally notice him, a day when his mother finally wants him but it feels wrong, it feels…bitter. Maybe because he is slightly angry, maybe he did hate them for the way he was, for the way they treated him like someone else. Maybe because he feels like they only want him now because of he had proved them wrong.

He loves his mom, his dad and his siblings, sometimes he wishes he could still be in their home sitting in the living room listening to his mother playing the violin and listening to his sister's whispering stories about her day in school, or his brother's laughter. That kind of thing would have been great.

Furihata feels his eyes warming up, his lips trembles.

Ah there it is, he thought as he sniffs.

He tucks his phone away and inhales the cold night air.

Speaking of which, he wonders what made Kuroko ask about Akashi. It has been long since that incident happen. Akashi…is not Akashi, the only person he wishes to meet again probably no longer remembers him. Maybe the other one barely recognizes him. His heart breaks at the thought but somehow he thought it was alright, perhaps he really doesn't deserve their meeting. They were two opposite forces that simply couldn't be in the same place at the same time.

Turning away from the quiet street he decides to come. He passes a few oblivious people while across the street a massive LED Screen on a building flashes their upcoming live show with previews of their street performance of Solution and their newest PV. He doesn't stop and continues to walk from there like any ordinary people. He likes this, he likes feeling like an ordinary person.

"Oh my god isn't that Akashi Seijuuro?"

Furihata blinks at that, did hear that right? He looks up and turns towards a crowd gathering in the side of the street. He tries to squeeze around, and when he gets a good spot his eyes widen at the sight he has never seen before. Standing there in the corner, alone with just a worn out wooden black guitar and a very poor excuse of a disguise, is Akashi Seijuuro indeed. He looks up from his guitar to the crowd and smiles making the women in the crowd squeal in delight.

Furihata couldn't help but hear the loud beating of his heart, somehow this Akashi…this one…this is…

His hair is slightly disordered unlike his usual clean look with perfectly styled hair, he had loss his usual formal attire of slacks and a button up shirt and replaced with dark fitting jeans, a simple red shirt and a plaid button up shirt that is tied and hangs in his waist. And there he wore a very relaxed smile that reminded Furihata of Kuroko's expression whenever the teal haired musician climbs up the stage. Akashi doesn't give much attention to the number of people starting to take videos of him, and he starts to test the tune of his guitar. He adjusts it before testing it and when he finds it satisfactory, he takes a breath in and he starts to sing.

"natsukaze ga nokku suru mado o akete miru to

Doko kara ka mayoikonda no tori koe

Yomikake no hon wo oki

'doko kara kita n dai' to warau

Mekakushi shita mama no gogo sanji desu

Sekai wa angai shinpuru de

Fukuzatsu ni kaiki shita watashi nante

Dare ni rikai mo sarenai mama"

The crowd quiets down and listens to Akashi's voice, his strumming is gentle and very refreshing. Closing his eyes Furihata tries to feel the music, it reminds him of a spring, it is cool, warm it feels like the first time he met Akashi. He was standing there with his peculiar eyes and a small curious smile. He opens his eyes and he finds Akashi smiling as he is singing as if he lost to his own world.

There was no anger, bitterness or coldness in him like the first time they met in the studio. He looks calm just like the spring, his voice is the same, he wants to reach to it. The strumming and Akashi's voice continues to serenade the public and it almost looks divine.

Akashi closes his eyes and when he opens it he turns his head to the side and his eyes met with familiar brown eyes. Furihata almost gasps as the familiar pair of red eyes stare right him and his cheeks quickly burn. Akashi's eyes widen a fraction before he smiles his way.

"Me o awasenaide

Katamatta kokoro

Hitori-bochi de

Akiramete

Me ni utsuutta mono

Ni ando suru hibi"

Furihata couldn't help but find himself smiling at the song, it's full of youthfulness and hope, it is almost uncharacteristic of Akashi Seijuuro but a good kind of uncharacteristic. The last time Furihata heard Akashi sung it was emotional, it was full angst it reminded him of the rain but now it is exactly the opposite.

The red haired musician doesn't look away and continues to look at him with a smile and a soft expression almost as if talking to him, telling him something.

"Me wo fusagi uzukumaru sugata ni

Sono hito wa odoroite

'Me o miru to ishi ni natte shimau'

To iu to tada waratta

'Boku datte ishi ni natte shimau to

Obiete kurashiteta

Demo sekai wa angai obienakute

Ii da yo?'"

Akashi smiles and lowers his head, his strumming slows down and becomes more tender. He smiles as he feels Furihata's soft brown eyes watching him intently. He closes his eyes again for a brief moment, those curious big brown eyes didn't seem to change despite the years, despite the things he has gone through, such beautiful, fragile and warm soul.

He knew he'd come here, he knew he'd come to him somehow and he is right, his imagination forest, his own little peace, his haven, his Furihata.

"Natsu kaze ga kyou mo mata anata ga

Kurete fuku no

Fuudo o sukoshu dake yurashite miseta"

As he finishes the song, the crowd claps loudly around, none of them seem to care about recording his performance like earlier, they were all intently listening which somehow stirs something warm inside him. His lips curl to a smile as he looks down at his fingers, his calloused fingers from strumming instruments, when was the last time they played without a care in the world?

His mind reels back to vague images of Kuroko, and the rest of the band walking out of Teiko in the middle of the afternoon and looking for a good spot to just play. It wasn't him, he knows, they were memories of the other one but still they made him calm, they soothe him inside like their mother's gentle strokes. He has probably forgotten those things buried under that bitterness, those…that sadness, their fear and collective loneliness.

He had so many good things, he had Kuroko, Kise, Aomine, Murasakibara and Midorima, he could have had all they ever needed but…

"You are no longer the person I know Akashi-kun."

He was scared, too scared that it drove him to cling selfishly to that connection. He should have stopped him, he should have woke up earlier but he couldn't, he was still the same coward.

And then there he was, just like flicker in the seemingly endless darkness of that tunnel, Furihata came from nowhere when he thought it was too late for the both of them. The frown washes from his lips as he raises his head, he finds him there standing yet still, half of his flushed face is hidden underneath that thick scarf.

"Encore! Encore!" The crowd demands.

Akashi chuckles and nods before fixing the fake glasses in his nose. He fixes the sling of his guitar before turning to where Furihata stands, without a word he took the brunet's wrist and pulls him in the middle of the crowd.

"You look sad tonight." Akashi says feigning innocence about the brunet's identity.

Furihata tries to hide his face more through the scarf making Akashi smile at the adorable sight.

"Do you have any request?" Akashi asks with a smirk.

There are collective whispers among the crowd saying how lucky that random kid to be chosen by Akashi to give a song request while some asks each other who the scarf clad young man may be. Furihata feels everyone's eyes on him, however unlike when he plays the drums he feels naked and bare in the eyes of these people as if Akashi's aura itself is not enough. Suddenly the air seems thinner and the air colder, his body trembles from nervousness.

"It's alright."

Furihata blinks as he hears Akashi whispers, he turns to see his red eyes and he finds a soft expression there, reassuring and warm. He feels his heart calms at the sight.

"How about I choose a song for you instead?" Akashi offers and the women in the crowd giggles and squeals exclaiming how lucky the stranger in scarf is. Akashi could beg to differ, if they were the one standing there in his spot they would know that the one who is truly lucky would be him.

"P-Please." Furihata answers quietly making Akashi smile.

Akashi laughs making Furihata's eyes wide, his fragile heart skips a beat at the rare sound of the red head's laughter. The women squeal and started to exclaim something about marrying them or something. Furihata is too preoccupied with the Akashi to understand the rest of the things going on.

"You are quite adorable." Akashi says in a hushed voice, before he smirks, "I would pick the song however you must give me something in return as well."

"E-Eh?" Furihata gasps, he hope Akashi would not ask him to reveal himself.

Akashi smiles and reaches to fix Furihata's scarf as if understanding what he was thinking.

"Sing with me?" he asks outloud making the crowd gasps and cheer.

Furihata's eyes widen, he remembers this request…but…

"I know you have a talent with picking up music, so just go with the flow alright?"

Furihata wasn't able to say anything when Akashi raises his guitar and starts to tune his guitar again. When Akashi raises his head he nods his head to signal the cue. When he starts to strum Furihata blinks, he knows this song, this is one of the last songs performed by the Generation of Miracles, it was only performed once in a live and was never included in any of the band's album then a few days after that the band broke up.

Akashi looks up from his guitar to Furihata's brown eyes, a smile plays confidently in his lips.

"Machiawase wa nijikan mae de

Koko ni hitori sore ga kotae desho

Machi yuku hito nagareru kumo

Boku no koto o azawaretteta"

Akashi raises his eyebrow signalling quietly to Furihata who ducked his head. Perhaps he was asking for too much, Akashi thought to himself as he sees the brunet's gesture, however he found a smile back to his lips as he finds Furihata starting to mouth the lyrics quietly.

"sore ga kantan de, totemo konnan de"

Akashi finds himself satisfied as Furihata takes the second voice, and finally breaks out in a duet with him despite his head lowered. The moment he heard his voice he stopped caring about the rest of the world. He continues to strum and nod his head to the beat.

He had imagined his singing voice for a very long since he heard him hum a nursery song when they were young. He knew he could sing, he knew he could be more than what those people credited him for. They were wrong about him and he knew.

His voice is a spice to his, it is new, fresh, dangerous, feisty, sensual and at the same time it is innocent, warm and elegant.

"aa mawatte mawatte mawaritsukarete

Aa iki ga iki ga kireta no

Sou kore ga kanashii boku no matsuo da

Kimi no tadoritsukenai mama de."

Akashi's smiles widen as he makes his voice louder forcing Furihata to meet the volume and finally his voice can be heard by most of their audience, he could hear some whispering praises to the unknown brunet.

"Boku o noseta chikyuu wa mawaru

Nani mo iezu tachisukumu boku."

Akashi smirks as Furihata looks up at him, he quietly decides to settle from singing the pre-chorus part forcing Furihata to sing it himself. Akashi finds the tiny panic in those eyes as the prechorus approaches and he doesn't show any signs of singing that part. Out of panic, Furihata takes the bait and sings the prechorus, and Akashi almost wanted to close his eyes and just listen to that voice forever.

He feels a soft hum in the back of his head, a contented hum almost like purr, he knew this well, it was him. He knew somehow his other half liked Furihata as well, he liked the way the brunet posed a challenge to him, brave but meek at the same time, he subjugates and submits. And it is just the way his heart could make theirs skip a beat by just being itself.

His presence and his voice are like a kiss to their scars, a promise.

Akashi joins Furihata's voice in the chorus stepping closer to the brunet forcing the brunet to look up to him, he is still flushed like an embarrassed child. Despite his voice being slightly muffled by his scarf Akashi could still his voice loud and clear in his ears. It's smooth like the flowing river in the mountains.

"ah kawatte kawatte yuku no ga

Aa kowai kowai dake na no

Mou yameta koko de kimi no matsu no wa

Boku ga kowarete shimau dake da

Aa mawatte mawatte mawaritsukarete

Aa iki ga iki ga tomaru na no

Sou boku wa kimi ni ga nozomu PIERO da

Kimi ga omou mama ni ayatsutte yo."

Akashi nods his head as he finishes the song. When the music ends he finally turns to face the crowd and smiles. He allowed them to take a few pictures before bowing down.

"Thank you for listening, I wouldn't be able to take signs for now but perhaps next time we meet."

The people murmurs and starts to disperse calmly surprisingly, a few waves at Akashi first before leaving. As the crowd vanishes, Akashi sees Furihata in the side of his eyes ducking his head and trying to leave as well, fortunately he doesn't have the thin presence that Kuroko has and though he may be plain it is not that difficult to spot him. Akashi quickly takes Furihata's wrist and prevents him from leaving.

"U-Uhm…"

Akashi fakes a smile and turns to Furihata.

"I've waited quite a while for you, wouldn't it be unfair you just leave me like this?"

"E-Eh uh…I…but I…"

"Why don't you take me to some coffee, Furihata Kouki?"

Furihata's face flushes at the way his name rolls on Akashi's lips. The red head simply smiles at him. Whoever was in control doesn't matter, Furihata feels cold sweat drop by the side of his head, because both would be the death of him.

"It's been a while, why don't we have a date, Kouki?"

ADDITIONAL NOTES:

The first song used is Imagination Forest, I recommend Itou Kashirou's version since his voice really reminds me of Akashi's(Kamiya Hiroshi). The song is a bit similar with Bokushi's life I guess, the song Imagination Forest is among the songs in the album Mekakucity Days. For those who hasn't seen the music video or known the show/series, the song is about a story of child who has powers with her eyes. She lived in a forest away from the rest of the world since she was young, she lives alone because her mother died, she has only known the world through her books but one day a boy came and knocked on her door. She was scared to open for him, she was scared that she would hurt the boy and turn him into snow if he sees her. By the end of the song the boy convinces the girl to conquer her fear as he conquers his(the boy was also afraid he'd turn to stone) and extinguish it. The girl then finally realizing that she doesn't necessarily turn people to stone, agrees to explore the wild future with the boy, knowing he would be there waiting for her and guiding her.

The second song used is Karakuri Pierrot. It's originally sung by Miku but again ahahaha I recommend Itou Kashirou's version(there is one that is a duet) or the one by Iname Toru(he has a very pretty MV for it btw), the song is actually a sad song despite the upbeat jazz like rhythm. The song is about a lover receiving a bitter answer from the other in a form of the other's absence. The lover waits and finds himself making a fool of himself with his hope despite knowing the slim chance of an affirmative answer. The lover knew it could have been that way and yet he decided to take that hope but was slapped by the sad truth.