Hiya! This has been a long time coming, but I finally got off my butt and finished it! I always wondered if since Mia had her powers before her parents died, maybe kanays worked differently than witches when out came to development. So, I wrote a story about Daniel, Diego, Phillip, and Jax being tortured by a small child.
Because I'm cruel. Lol.
Anyway, I hope this is enjoyable for you. Please excuse any grammatical errors; in my current situation I can only do a basic once over of the story. Sorry.
Disclaimer: Every Witch Way is not mine. This story carries a high risk of death by laughter. I am not responsible for the casualties caused by this story. Continue at your own risk. You have been warned.
P.S. That thing about death was over dramatic, in case anyone is scared.
"Please Daniel! It's just a couple hours!"
"No way! He will set me on fire, Mia!"
Daniel Miller was currently arguing with his wife, Mia, about their 17 month old son, Trevor. Mia had planned a day out with the girls, despite said day requiring Daniel to watch Trevor. Alone. For five hours.
How do you watch a child that likes to set stuff on fire?!
"Not if you do it right! Just let him watch cartoons, make him food, and don't cause a tantrum."
"That's easy for you to say! Mia, when you're not here he is very hard to handle!"
"Please Daniel. You know I haven't really had a real girl's day since the baby was born. You can call the guys over to help. Just for today, I'm begging you!" She pleaded, giving him her sweet face. She gently grabbed his arm, and slid her body up against his, knowing just how to get what she wanted.
Daniel sighed, surpressing a groan made from a mix of dread and pleasure. "Okay. I, guess it's only fair." He conceded. She squealed, planting a kiss on his cheek before she pulled him into a hug.
"Thank you! You're the best husband ever!"
"Uh huh. Sure I am. How long until two?"
"It's eleven thirty, so two and a half hours." Mia concluded. Daniel faked a smile, watching her race for the bathroom.
Two and a half hours until my son has double that time to kill me. Great...
As much as he loathed the fact that unlike witches and wizards, kanays usually got their powers very young, he had to admit; he wouldn't trade Mia and Trevor for the world. He still wished he would be older when he got them. Jax was so freaking lucky...
He knew Mia was excited for today. She wasn't wrong about the fact that she hadn't been on a real girl's day since Trevor was born. She'd gone out, but whenever she did the baby was always with her. Or she had less than an hour before he'd need something. It wasn't fair to Mia to not get that time, so Daniel decided to bite the bullet and make her happy. Surely he wouldn't die.
"Trevor! Don't go in the kitchen alone! Oh no. No fireballs!"
"Everything is going to be fine. I have dinner made for him in the fridge, cartoons recorded for when live ones go off, and plenty of tapes of my lullabies. You have his diaper bag in the nursery, and plenty of clean clothes. The fire extinguisher is in the kitchen... Is that everything?" Mia asked, doing a quick once over of the room. Daniel chuckled.
"Yes. Now, go outside. If Andi honks that horn one more time I'm going to have a freaking heart attack."
"Okay. The guys will be here in five. I love you guys." She leaned up to give Daniel a kiss, and then Trevor raced in the room as fast as his waddling little legs would carry him. Aww, babies.
"Momma, go?" He frowned, tilting his head. Mia smiled at his reaction, and picked him up when he tugged her jeans.
"Only for a couple of hours, honey. Mommy is going to have some girl fun, and you and daddy are going to bond a little." She encouraged. Trevor teared up.
"Mommy, no fun with me and Dada?" He asked. Mia quickly shook her head.
"No no no, baby. Mommy has lots of fun with you and daddy. But sometimes, Mommies have to go on little trips so babies can bond with their daddies. Okay? And, Mommy will even bring you home a present, how's that sound?"
His little face lit up, and he started clapping his hands like wild. "Present, present!"
Mia and Daniel let out a laugh. "Okay then, big boy. Now, you go play. Mommy will be back before bed time."
"OK mama. Pway time!" He scampered off. Mia chuckled again.
"That could've been a disaster. Love you." She gave him one last kiss, and then left. Daniel stared at the door and sighed. Within moments, he heard a wind storm.
"Trevor! You're not supposed to play wind storm when your mom is gone! Don't break that!"
This was going to be a long five hours...
"Remind me why Daniel can't babysit his own kid, again?" Jax asked Diego and the two of them and Phillip knocked on the door. The kanay sighed.
"Kanays usually get their powers really young Jax, which makes them hard to care for. Madds and I have a time as it is. Now take that, and add being human to the mix."
"Still sounds like a matter of parenting issues to me." He snorted.
Daniel opened the door, soaked with purple liquid. Every guy's jaw dropped, and Jax began trying his hardest to stifle his laughter. This was gold!
"Help. Me." Daniel wheezed before face planting on the porch. The guys still stared at him for a moment, until a head of light brown hair and a mischievous grin appeared being Daniel.
"Oh no." Diego shuddered. Trevor suddenly raced for the bathroom, while Phillip was helping a very scared Daniel up.
"What the- I don't want to know." Jax raised his hands, and they all entered the house, Daniel still shaking in horror.
"Jam. And a windstorm. With water. I don't know where from." He shuddered, and spit out water. It occurred to everyone else in that moment, the only water source Trevor could touch was the toilet.
"Let's catch him." Phillip and Jax nodded, racing for the open door to the bathroom. A still shocked, scared as hell Daniel, grabbed a towel.
This was five minutes. How would he last five hours?
In the bathroom, Phillip and Jax found the child somehow by God's grace, doing nothing wrong. He was just staring at the toilet, blankly. The best friends looked at one another and slowed their paces, trying not to trigger Trevor's unpredictable baby mind.
"Fishy!" He dove his hands into the bowl, and like a gymnast, did a weird ass acrobatic handstand.
This kid wasn't even two! How the hell?
"No, no, no. No fishy! Jax, help me get him out."
Somehow, Trevor lodged his hands in some sort of hole, so tugging on him didn't work. The guys had to physically maneuver his hands around until they were visible, then pull him out. By the time Phillip set Trevor down, Jax had to put down the seat and sit, instead of looking for something heavy.
"He. Is. A. Baby. How does he do this?"
"Hell if I know!" Phillip shouted, chasing the toddler that somehow managed to escape his arms and take off running. The wizard groaned.
"This is going to be a long day. Why did I let Em talk me into this?"
A few hours of staring directly at Trevor, who was in a three foot high play pen, thanks to magic, and watching cartoons, passed. Everything seemed calm and quiet. That was a blessing.
So, by default, it had to end.
"I think I'm going to go grab a blanket for the little guy. He looks sleepy." Daniel smiled. Finally!
"Okay. I'll go with you. We've been sitting here for six episodes of Oso Special and my legs are asleep." Diego yawned, and stood up with Daniel. He had been up all night himself, because Everly had the flu and kept sneezing elements.
"Watch him like a hawk." Daniel ordered, the most serious Jax had ever seen him. It took all the wizard has to suppress his laughter. He and Phillip nodded.
A few moments later, Jax glanced at the kitchen. "Hey, Phillip. I'm going to go get us a snack. Watch the kid, okay?"
His best friend didn't hear a word he said, being a cartoon loving man child, but nodded. "Yeah, yeah. Sure, whatever, bro."
A minute passed, and the urge to use the bathroom got really, noticeably strong in Phillip. He glanced around and frowned, not really sure where everybody went.
Eh, well. He's in a three foot high play pen. What's the harm in walking away for just a second? He reasoned, and stood, heading for the room like an idiot.
Minutes later, the bathroom door creaked open and Trevor toddled in, while Philip was washing his hands. He smiled at the baby. "Hey, buddy. How'd you get in here? I thought you were-" He cut himself off, realizing where he was supposed to be and why.
"Oh shit." He mumbled, as the water from the sink and the toilet started to float. "Shit!"
Trevor smiled from ear to ear, clearly no longer tired, and dropped it all on his head before letting out a shriek and racing off. "Hey! Get back here, you little thing!"
Daniel, Diego, and Jax came racing in. "What the hell happened here?" The kanay wondered aloud. Phillip spit out some of the water.
"The kid."
Daniel looked at Jax and then Phillip with a glare sharp as a dagger. "I thought I told you to watch him!" He hissed.
"We were!" Jax put his hands up in defense. "I left for two seconds to get a snack, and then this one decided to go to the bathroom and leave Trevor unattended."
"You should know by now not to trust Phillip to do anything right! He can't!"
"Hey. I find that very offensive!" He spoke up. Daniel groaned.
"Fuck it. Whatever, let's just find my kid and... Oh no. Smoke!" He panicked, as did everyone else. They raced off to the kitchen, where the cabinets were now burning.
"God damn it! Diego!"
Genuinely scared of Daniel for the first time in his life, Diego shot water at the fire, extinguishing it before it could do any damage. Daniel quickly dove for his son, but Trevor dodged him, and went straight for the guest room, which he closed with a windstorm.
"Oh, hell. No, no, no. Dear God above, give me strength."
It turned out, he needed it. Because by the time he and the guys managed to lodge the door open, Trevor was completely naked, despite his onesie zipping in the back, and his diaper being taped on because he liked to remove it.
But that, wasn't even remotely the bad part. No, the coup de grace was the string of massive letters that read "Fuk U" on the wall, written in his own child's shit.*
It was confirmed. His kid hated him.
"Where the hell did he even learn that phrase?" Phillip laughed.
Jax shook his head, trying not to laugh, because Daniel was currently looking at Phillip like he would kill him. His chicken arms wouldn't allow it, of course, but he wanted to. "I have no idea. Just be glad he can't spell it right."
"Can I have a towel, now?" Phillip took off his jacket. "I'm cold and wet."
Jax sighed, and dried his buddy off, magically. "Thank you, Jax!"
Daniel and Diego were already heading for Trevor, and Jax went for the bathroom, sure there had to be cleaning supplies in there.
Two and a half hours to go.
Yay...
A few more hours and a ton of scrubbing later, Trevor was out cold, due to the help of the cough syrup Jax brought, just in case. Daniel didn't even care that his child had been drugged by the point, so long as he would sleep through the night.
The guys collapsed on the couch, completely spent. Trevor had played with water, burned the kitchen, stripped naked and cussed Daniel out in writing (Jax photographed it, to prove to the girls they didn't make it all up) as well as thrown Diego and Daniel across the room.
They were beyond done. Now, they were the ones that needed a day off.
"Danny! We're home." If there was a heaven, his wife's voice was the choir of angels singing. Mia and the girls came through the door, and not one of their husband's was any less than grateful beyond words to see them.
"Oh, thank God!" He shot up out of the recliner, grabbed her face, ignoring the shopping bags she held, and kissed her as hard as he could. Mia smiled once her shock wore off, and kissed him back.
"Well, hello to you, too." She laughed.
"Em!" Jax was also extremely happy, as were Diego and Phillip. The four women looked at one another with suspicion, wondering what the hell made their husbands want to be so loving, suddenly. Yes, normally they were sweet, but they were looking at them like the had just escaped Vietnam or something.
"Hey."
"Let's go home." He grabbed her hand. "I want to go home and see our sweet, loving, innocent, powerless children. Right now."
She cocked an eyebrow, wondering what was up with the description. "Okay. What happened to all of you? You look like we rescued you from a war zone."
"We were." They all said in unison.
Daniel and the rest of the guys continued on to tell them the full story, from the acrobatic handstand (Emma's favorite) to the cussing in poop (Andi's favorite) to the cough syrup trick Maddie made a mental note of.
"Hold on a minute." Mia crossed her arms. "You drugged our child?"
Daniel went ghost white. "Well, uh, Jax gave him the dosage! And to be fair, the kid tried to kill me. It's just cough syrup. He won't die."
Mia laughed, harder than he had seen her laugh before. "I'm not mad! I just wish I knew about the sooner! Do you know how many long nights I've been up with him just because he wasn't tired, yet?"
Relief washed over both Daniel and Jax, because they were both sure they were going to be killed.
"You poor boys." Andi smirked. "The kid must hate all of you. He's an angel for us."
"He is sure as hell not an angel!" Phillip shook his head. "And, by the way, we are never having kids."
She rolled her eyes. "Uh huh. Sure."
Emma and Maddie were just a private mess of giggles. "I have never been more glad our kids will be at least seven before the get their powers." She wrapped her arms around Jax's neck, and gave him a peck on the lips. "I'm sorry you four had to suffer like that."
He chuckled. "All is well that ends well. I'm just glad I remembered that trick from when Jessie got that one flu and nearly killed everyone. Turns out my dad is good for something, after all."
She hugged him again, and Diego headed for Maddie. "Please tell me we can convince your mom to watch Everly and Ryan overnight. If I have to deal with another small child using the elements I will shoot myself."
It may have been inappropriate, but she laughed. "Don't worry. I was going to surprise you. They were already staying over."
"Thank God!"
After a few more minutes of chatting, everyone left in their separate cars, and went home. Mia grinned at Daniel, and gave him a look he knew all too well.
"What?" He asked warily.
"I got a present for you, too. You know, for watching Trevor." She shrugged, and leaned against the table.
He smiled. "Really? Mia, you didn't have to do that."
"Yes, I did." She insisted. "You did something you didn't want to do, for obviously good reasons, so I could be happy. You deserve a present." She hooked her fingers in his belt loops and kissed him.
"Okay, then. Where is it?" He asked. She gave him the look again, stood on her tiptoes, and whispered in his ear.
"I'm wearing it."
That night, she most definitely made it up to him. Trevor slept until eight in the morning (Daniel would have to thank Jax, later) and when he woke, he was once again am agreeable child, in the presence of his mother.
But Daniel still never wanted to babysit, again.
This was meant to be funny, and adorable! I just loved writing Trevor. It was so much fun! Poor guys. I feel like I should apologize for making them suffer. :(
*I am not even kidding you. When my brother was a Trevor's age, he used to SOMEHOW, like Houdini, get off all his clothes, including a duck taped, backward diaper, off, and throw poop at my mom. Seriously. I wish I was lying.
Anyway, this is my late Christmas present to you all, since I may not be able to make a story for it! Hopefully I can for New Year's, since I'm busting my butt working this out.
Love you guys! Kisses!
Review?