Wellness Update: I still feel bad, sadly. Also, I am on Spring friggin Bresk, so that sucks and the universe despises me, absolutely. However, lucky for me, a writer's work is never done and I have plenty to work on.

Hey. So, I have decided that in order to both increase my average wordcount per story, and decrease the amount of clutter found on my profile, I am slowly going to start moving all of my one-shots (except for the extremely special ones [ex: Fade because it can be triggering, Heartbeat, my first one shot]) to the collection.

I promise, not much will change. You'll just be able to follow one single story and have access to many, in return. From this point forward all new one shots (unless they are triggering, or special edition) will be found here!

Warning: This story is pretty sad, though not truly angsty. You may end up crying over the sadness, but you may not. Neither makes you better than the other.

Disclaimer: Every Witch Way is absolutely, a hundred thousand percent, not remotely mine. This is all fun and games. Just enjoy the fanfiction.

Jax,

It's been a while. Like, a year. A very, very long, horrible year, for me at least. Don't know about you, but hopefully yours is better...

I know you most likely don't want to read this, especially not after everything that went down with us. But we still have some unresolved issues and I'm in the mood to fix them, so what that hell.

Last time we talked, we acted like idiot high schoolers that weren't willing to deal with the fact that we wouldn't see each other again for a long time. We said things we didn't mean, because we were kids, and kids are idiots. Actuallu, we still are kids. And knowing us, even with the four musketeers broken up we are both still going to keep our promise to tell adulthood to fuck itself as long as we can.

But, I know that there are definitely some thing you deserve to know. I don't hate you. I never did. You were a tornado that spun into my life, ripped it all to hell, and made me love you. Don't know how you managed it, but when I wasn't looking you took my heart without my permission. Bastard. (I mean that in the most endearing way possible)

And then, you were a day away from leaving me to go to the other side of the world. I was headed for Puerto Rico, you were going back home to Sydney. I loved you move than I ever thought you could love someone and you were about to leave me. It hurt.

So, when we fought, I told you that I hated you. I told you that I wished I never met you. Because if I never met you, I wouldn't love you and it wouldn't hurt like hell. I hated our lives, and that all those teachers who told us we would never last were right, and I wanted to stop time and scream and, well, you get the idea.

I spent three months trying to convince myself that I meant it before I gave in. The things that you and I did to each other, out of fear and anger, were horrible. I wish I could take back that fight. God, I do.

Life tore us apart, and I sulked for a while. But someone new walked into my life. Patrick pulled me out of whatever stage of grief I was in and showed me that college is supposed to be about enjoying life. These past six months, all he's done is make me happy. I'm lucky to be with someone like him, who's willing to stay with me even after all the time that I've woken up from a dream saying your name. Honestly, I don't deserve him.

I hope you're happy. I hope some other girl, fiery and stubborn and all the things that you are, walked into your life to be what I never was. We were always just a little too different for our story to really work. I guess a fore that burns so bright just isn't meant to last.

I quoted Veronica Roth. So freaking what? She's a smart lady.

Our first reunion for high school is coming up in a month. I don't know if you'll be there or not. I hope you will, kind of. I'm not sure if I plan to say something or to hide all night, but I miss you just enough to want to see you again.

I must be the worst girlfriend on the planet. Here I am, on my laptop at one in the morning, my boyfriend sleeping like a rock, writing a letter to someone I haven't even had the balls to call in a year. It's bad enough that I miss you, much as I hate it. This must make me terrible.

Why is life such a bitch? Really, why? All I wanted was you. I wanted to do all the things we planned, keep the promises we made, and never know what heartbreak felt like, again. Part of me knew when we climbed out of that pool that you meant more to me than Daniel ever did, and if I lost you hell would freeze over and the Earth would burn.

Maybe that's a little dramatic, but that's pretty much how it felt for me.

I suppose, maybe I am only doing this for closure. Maybe our goodbye wasn't good enough. Actually, there's no way it was good enough. But, if we never get to stand on top of the Eiffel Tower on New Year's Eve, at least I know I got to tell you I wish you all the happiness in the world. And at least one little rugrat to make you wonder why the hell you ever decided to have kids!

This is long overdue. This is the goodbye where I start sobbing uncontrollably and beg both myself and the universe not to do it, even though I know at the bottom of my heart that it has to happen for either of us to grow.

I guess we've reached the end of our story. This is where I let you go.

Thank you for the time of my life. Thank you for all the wonderful stories to tell. And thank you, for teaching me to watch out for the bad boy's that are going to smile at my daughter one day, and take all rational decision making abilities from her, as well as her heart.

Thanks for making me realize, I didn't have a damned clue what love was like until I walked into my dad's office and you dropped the pen you'd been levitating.

I hope I'll see you at the reunion.

Goodbye, my Grade A Jerk.

Love always,

Em.