AN After this chapter this time!
Chapter Fifteen
Merle didn't have a clue where he was when he woke up. He wasn't in his own room or his own house. Hell, he may not even be in Georgia anymore. He looked around and realized he had passed out on the dirty floor of some fucked up flop of a room. His mouth tasted foul, his stomach heaved and he gagged as he pushed himself up off the floor.
His eyes flitted around the room. It smelled like stale smoke, stale beer and garbage. Their was someone asleep on the couch but his muddled memory wouldn't cooperate. He had no idea who the woman was. He only knew it was a woman at all because she had one arm hanging off the couch and there was no way a man could be that thin.
He remembered going home yesterday morning. He remembered shooting up. He'd made a few phone calls and then people started showing up. He'd told himself that a party was in order. It was the beginning of a new era for him. He no longer had anyone breathing down his neck. He didn't have to do a fucking thing that he didn't want to do. He tried to convince himself that he was better off. He didn't remember a whole lot after his old friends had shown up.
He ran a hand over his head and glanced around again. What was he doing here? Why the fuck had he done what he'd done? A heavy weight settled in his chest and he sat down heavily in a threadbare chair that sat in font of the dirty window. He glanced over, wondering again where he was. That was when he realized the rig that was sitting partially opened on the sill.
He grabbed the box, opening it quickly and glancing up at the sleeping woman on the couch. He peered into the box and then grinned. He snatched the small twisted baggy out of the box and looked it over. The needles were wrapped and everything in the box was clean. He wondered idly if it would have mattered to him if it wasn't.
Minutes later he was grimacing at the burn rushing up his arm. It was a familiar sting at first but it wasn't followed by the head rush that he was expecting. The burn grew progressively worse as the drug flowed through him. He scowled at the feeling and then stood up quickly when his heart lurched painfully.
He stumbled to the couch and kicked it hard. "Hey, what the fuck was in the box, lady?" He asked. Sweat was pouring from him and the girl on the couch didn't stir. He kicked it again, panicking slightly. He reached down to shake her and then stumbled backwards. The girl was cold. Stiff.
"Fuck," he whispered. The fire was spreading throughout his chest now. He tripped over something on his way to the door but righted himself at the last minute. Something told him that if he went down, he wasn't going to get back up. He'd die here. He'd die in some fucking flop where no one knew him. Whatever was in that box had killed the girl on the couch. He was goddamn lucky to be alive as it was.
He leaned into the wall as he walked towards a flight of stairs, blinking sweat out of his eyes. His vision throbbed with every beat of his heart. If he could make it outside he would be okay. He would be fine if...
He yanked the door open and stepped onto the sidewalk, glancing around. Wherever he was it was obvious he was in a really bad part of town. All the buildings here were rundown and the traffic was light. He felt disoriented, dizzy. Before he knew what was happening his legs gave out and he hit the sidewalk hard, lying on his side as a pain slashed through his chest and then his head. He was about to black out.
No. That wasn't exactly true. He was sure he knew what was happening. He wasn't blacking out. He was dying. He was dying on the sidewalk on a dirty street. The last thought he had before his vision went black was of his brother. How he hadn't been able to do for him like he had always wanted. How he was going to die without knowing if the boy would forgive him or not... How thoroughly he had managed to fail.
~H~
To keep the kids occupied until Daryl got home she decided that he probably needed a few things and taking them shopping was better than watching them sulk. She may have gone overboard but all three of them had fun with it. When he'd gotten in bed last night he'd smelled like a jolly rancher so she got him his own soap. After that she just went a little crazy. She didn't think he would stop by the house he'd shared with his brother so he really had nothing.
They bought shirts, pants, boxers, socks, and two new pairs of boots since his had looked pretty worn. Everything that she could think of that he may need, she got it. He'd complain and she would roll her eyes at him and he'd get over it. There wasn't anything he could do about it because the clothes were already hung up and put away in drawers.
She made spaghetti because that was one of the few things that neither of the kids complained about. She wasn't worried about Daryl not liking it because she was sure if he'd eat a rabbit then he would most likely eat anything as long as it passed as food. She was cooking later than usual so he would be able to have a hot meal when he came home. Something told her that his diet consisted of whatever he threw in the microwave after work or food from what ever burger place they passed on the way home from work. Merle sure didn't strike her as the type to cook.
She hadn't heard the van pull into the driveway but she did hear the door slam shut. By the time he walked into the kitchen he'd taken his boots off. Her stomach tightened at the site of him. He was filthy, covered in a layer of sweat and dirt. His shirt clung to him. If they had been alone she would have been all over him.
"You're in trouble. Last time I came in that dirty, mama yelled at me," Jake said worriedly.
Daryl eyed the boy and grinned. "Yeah but she ain't my boss." They both laughed and then his eyes slid over, meeting hers. He winked.
She shook her head and fought a grin of her own. "You go shower and by the time you get done, this will be ready."
"Yes ma'am," he muttered as he passed her.
Lily grinned. "But you said she wasn't your boss!" She called after him.
"I lied. She does the cookin'. She's the boss, little girl. Those are just the rules."
"You have clothes in the closet," she called as soon as he left the room.
He walked back in, a frown pulling his brows together. "I told you not to go buyin' me anything."
She hummed and then stirred the meat sauce. "Okay. I'll go ahead and take it all back. I don't want you to be uncomfortable. I have a couple of nightgowns that are too big for me in the back of the closet. You can go ahead and wear one of them. Tomorrow the kids and I will return everything we bought you today. And since you can't borrow any of Jake's underwear since he's still got some growing to do, you can borrow some of mine. You'd look good in pink."
She kept her face straight as the kids fell into giggles at the table at the picture of their father wearing a nightgown. They were four so they thought she was much funnier than Daryl did.
He muttered something and stalked away.
She called out again. "The rest of your stuff is in our bathroom, not the one off the hall!"
~H~
Their bathroom. He refused to acknowledge how good that sounded in his head. Last night he'd used the other bathroom to take a shower because she'd been in this one getting ready for bed. He hadn't gotten a good look at it the night before. Now he got to appreciate the space. Sharing a bathroom with Merle was flat out fucking gross. He was a goddamn slob.
He wanted to hurry because he was starving but there was one of those huge rainfall shower heads in the middle of the large glass enclosed stall and the pressure felt incredible on his stiff muscles. The shower back at the house he had shared with Merle was cramped and moldy and the nozzle dripped water so slow that it usually took ten minutes just to rinse the shampoo out of his hair. She had gotten him his own stuff to wash with and, damn, he appreciated it. He wasn't used to anyone really thinking about him and the things that he might need. He was used to looking out for himself.
Reluctantly he hurried through it but made a vow to spend a fucking hour in there next time. Preferably with a naked soapy Carol in there with him. Maybe he'd better make it two hours. As he dressed he idly wondered how many gallons the water heater in this place held.
She'd done a good job gauging his size but that didn't really surprise him. It felt good to have something new. The last time he'd had new clothes was when he'd splurged a few years ago on work pants and he bought his shirts in packages of three, usually from the Dollar General. Before he turned the closet light off he glanced down at the floor and shook his head at the new boots sitting there. He was going to have a hard time getting used to this. He appreciated everything she'd done today but he felt a little bad. He didn't want to feel like a leach.
And the boots would have to wait a while to get broken in. He had talked to Russel after lunch, explaining things in more detail and letting him know that he needed to give his notice. He'd even told the man about how bad Lily had been that morning. He wouldn't do that to the girl again. And it wasn't that he wanted to spoil her either. He wanted her to know that she meant more to him than being a good employee. She meant more to him than a job. He needed them to know that just after one day, they meant more to him than anything did. He had never wanted kids but now that he had them all he wanted was to be the best dad he could be. He would wing it and he would do just fine.
So Russel had let him go, assuring him that if he ever wanted to come back, his job would always be there.
Daryl turned off the light and shut the closet door. By the time he got back to the kitchen she was filling their plates. It still felt weird. The scene before him, surreal. A family sitting down to eat an actual meal at an actual table. The sheer normalcy of it had him smiling to himself. Carol said something that had the two of them laughing again and she grinned at them. He smiled but then it faltered.
A memory came, unbidden, to the forefront of his mind. He couldn't have been much older than these two, maybe five years old, and him and Merle were sitting at a table much different than this one. Merle was fourteen at the time.
Daryl was still hungry, even though he was finished with his dinner. There hadn't been much to begin with. His mom and dad were sitting across from him and he knew that he shouldn't. He knew that he had already eaten his share but there was one more hot dog on the plate in the center of the table and it didn't look like anyone else was going to eat it.
Reluctantly he reached for it, glancing up to make sure his dad wasn't looking. Apparently he'd been watching out of the corner of his eye, catching Daryl in the act of "stealing" the last of the food. The man was fast. One second he was sitting there, paying no mind to the boy, and the next thing Daryl knew he was knocked clean out of his seat.
He'd rolled over onto his back and that was when Merle got up, shoving the table so hard that both their mom and dad were knocked backwards onto the floor. Daryl scrambled up, backing against the counter as Merle rounded the table and launched himself at the man.
The police came later. Daryl had stayed silent as they asked him questions and then Merle was hauled off in cuffs. It wasn't the first time. Before he was taken away he'd knelt down in front of him.
"You just keep yourself scarce, little brother. You watch yourself, keep quiet and stay outta the way. I can't keep an eye on you from Juvie. Maybe when I get out I can figure out a way to get you outta here, okay?"
Daryl had nodded, forcing back the tears as Merle was hauled off. He kept himself scarce but as soon as the last cop car pulled away, he had paid for what Merle had done.
He swallowed thickly and shook the memory. That wasn't his life anymore. This was his life. And it was going to be a good life.
"You like your clothes?" Lily beamed as he sat down across from her.
He nodded. "Sure do."
The girl grinned and dug in messily. He did the same but a few seconds later he felt Carol's hand on his knee. He glanced over and she was frowning, a worried look in her eyes. He held her gaze and then felt the corner of his mouth turn up. She searched his face for a few more moments before turning her attention back to her own plate.
I'm so sorry to all of you that wanted to see Merle in a better light than the one I've put him in but I needed this to happen in order to get anywhere with this story! I'll post the next chapter first thing tomorrow so you don't have to wait too long to find out what happens! Thanks for reading! =)