Everything is Going to be Okay

Author: PreppyPrincess5103

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Summary: Harm. & Mac struggle with a long-distance relationship after his return to flying.

Part 8

Harm watched as she took her plate and walked away from the food line. He picked up his cup of coffee and hurried over to her. He placed one hand on the small of her back and leaned in slightly. "Can we talk?"

She turned to look at him and raised an eyebrow. "Not ashamed to be seen with me?"

He winced. "I'm never ashamed to be seen with you."

"Mm-hmm." She started making her way to the most discrete table in the dining facility. She realized he wasn't following, and looked over her shoulder. "Aren't you coming?" She bit back a smile as he hurried to catch up with her. She sat and placed her napkin in her lap. She took a bite of her dinner as he watched her. After a moment of silence, she sat the fork down and folded her hands in her lap. "So, what do you want to talk about?"

He shrugged and sipped his coffee. "I don't know." He sighed and put the cup down. "Okay, I do. Mac, are you being this hard on Buxton because of things I've told you about him?"

She narrowed her eyes. "Harm, I knew within 30 seconds of meeting him that this guy is an entitled jerk, but no. If anything, the things you told me weren't nearly harsh enough. I'm being this hard on Buxton because it's my job to prosecute him, and that's what I'm trying to do." She pushed her plate toward him and folded her arms on the table. She leaned in and lowered her voice. "This guy is reckless, Harm. You've been telling me that for weeks. You told me a few weeks ago that he was going to end up getting someone killed. And now he has. Why hasn't anyone reigned him in? You're a natural leader, and I feel like you're so busy trying to be one of the guys that you aren't leading them. Instead of talking to people about him that could make a difference, you've been talking to your girlfriend."

He leaned back in his chair and narrowed his eyes. "I have been telling my girlfriend about my days, and about the things that are happening in my world. My coworkers come up. Should I not be doing that?"

"Of course you should be doing that. You can tell me anything and I hope you always will. But this is the problem with dating someone you work with. The lines get blurred. In other circumstances you can complain about coworkers and I may only see them occasionally at a Christmas party or something. But our careers can and will continue to intersect." She picked off a piece of the dinner roll and popped it in her mouth. He was quiet for a minute while he studied her. She noticed him staring and leaned back in her own chair. "What?"

He shook his head and offered her a slight smile. "This is the first time we've gone against each other in court since we started dating."

She smiled. "Yeah. The admiral told me he suspected we were together. I wonder if keeping us from facing off in court was on purpose?"

He laughed. "He's a smart man, so it wouldn't surprise me." He thought back to the beginning of their partnership and smiled broadly. "If we had been dating when I fired that weapon in the courtroom, how pissed off would girlfriend Mac have been?" Her laugh surprised him. "We were barely friends, and you were livid."

She smiled. "Exactly. We were barely friends. I actually think I'd react better to it now. I'm more familiar with your courtroom stunts and theatrics. Not much surprises me anymore." He was staring at her again and she cocked her head to the side. "What now?"

"Have I ever told you that you're a better lawyer than me?" His voice was gentle, and she could see the sincerity written all over his face.

She scoffed. "Thank you, but I doubt that."

He nodded. "You are, though. I may win more, but it's because of stunts and theatrics. You know the law. You're more interested in justice. I really admire that." He watched the blush spread across her face, and his heart began to beat a little faster. "I really, really wish we were alone right now."

She plucked the napkin off of her lap and stood. "Come on."

Harm pushed open the door to the fantail and was taken by surprise to see Brumby and Bud already there. Both men looked up at the sound of the door, and Harm tensed as he noticed Brumby glance back and forth at him and Mac.

"Sorry to interrupt." Mac said.

Bud shook his head. "No worries, ma'am. We both just needed some peace and quiet. I forgot how many people were on one of these ships. I better go inside though. I need to try and call Harriet."

Mac studied him for a minute. "Is everything okay, Bud?"

He nodded. "Fine, ma'am. Just tired. Have a good night." He walked back through the door.

Brumby was a few steps behind him. He turned and looked at the two of them again, and bit back a smirk. "How is Colonel Farrow doing, Colonel?"

She rolled her eyes and clenched her fists. "Go away, Commander." Once he was gone and the door was securely shut, she exhaled and turned to look at the water.

Harm approached her and circled his arms lightly around her waist. "He still thinks John is your secret boyfriend?" He felt her tremble as she laughed and he rested his chin on her shoulder. "Did I ever tell you about the time during your trial where Brumby accused all of us of being a little bit in love with you?"

Mac turned in his arms and gaped at him. "You did not. I'm scared to ask who 'all of us' is."

"According to Brumby, your fan club consists of Bud, the Admiral, and myself. He didn't mention John specifically, but since he was willing to take the fall for a murder for you, I'm guessing that was just implied."

"He actually told Bud and the Admiral that they were in love with me?" Harm nodded and she sighed. "He's an idiot."

"That he is." He ran his hands up and down her waist. "Although any man would have to be stupid not to be a little bit in love with you." She smiled and he leaned in to kiss her. After a long moment they pulled apart, and he leaned his forehead against hers. "Personally, I'm a lot in love with you."

The next evening…

Harm adjusted the weight on the bar, laid down and began to lift. He had hoped to spend more time with Mac, but she and Bud were working. He wasn't much of a gym person, but right now it was the only way he could think of to release some tension. He was frustrated with Brumby, he was frustrated with Buxton, and more than anything else he was sexually frustrated. He finished one set, and then lay there for a minute. He got up and added more weight to the bar and lay back down. He lifted it once, realized it was almost too heavy and gently sat it back down. He lifted himself up and bit and scanned the room. He spotted a few guys over by the water fountain.

"Hey, can one of you spot me for a few minutes?"

The whole group moved over to the weights. One lay down on the bench next to him, and the other two stood behind them. Harm did a few more sets, and quit once his arms began to shake and he didn't think he could lift anything else.

"Thanks for your help, I appreciate it."

"Anytime, sir." The young man picked up his water bottle, and he and the other two left the gym.

Harm sat on the bench and scanned his surroundings. He stood up and wiped down the equipment before heading to a treadmill. After a brief warm-up he increased the speed and began to run. He saw a familiar figure come in the room and he groaned inwardly. Brumby. And just his luck, he was heading to the only other open treadmill – the one next to his. He increased his speed and focused on the group of TVs mounted near the ceiling. Brumby took the open treadmill but didn't say a word. He began to run, and focused his attention on the TVs as well.

They had kept this up for a while, when two young pilots came in and headed to the recently freed treadmills a few down from Harm's. He kept running, but came to an abrupt stop at a few of the words he had picked up from their conversation. The words he had heard - 'Mackenzie' 'tits' 'ass' 'her knees' 'bitch' - made his blood run cold. He realized that Brumby had also stopped running, and one look at his face told him that he had heard them as well. Harm calmly stepped off of the treadmill, walked over to the younger men and pulled the emergency key out of one of the treadmills. The runner stumbled at the abrupt stop and grabbed the rails to keep from falling. The other wisely stopped on his own.

Harm was aware of Brumby approaching and leaned in close. "You will not speak those words about Colonel MacKenzie, or any other female officer, ever again. Do I make myself clear? The Colonel is superior to the two of you by much more than just rank, and you will treat her with respect."

"We were just joking around," one said, "lighten up."

Harm stepped closer. "I will not lighten up, and you do not want to try me on this. Do I make myself clear?"

The two men were both silent, and one finally nodded. "Yes sir. I apologize, sir."

He glared at the one who hadn't responded and waited until he nodded. Harm walked away and Brumby followed after him. "Rabb."

Harm turned and sighed. "Brumby."

"Colonel Farrow isn't in the picture, is he?"

Harm said a silent prayer that Mac wouldn't kill him, and shook his head. "He's not. Thank you for having my back." He said quietly. "I couldn't just stand there and listen to them saying those things about her."

"I don't stand for that either. No matter who it is. But especially not when it's someone I know and like." Brumby hesitated a moment. "Why keep it a secret? You're not in the same chain of command anymore."

"She wants it to be a secret. She was tired of being the star of the JAG gossip mill, so she wanted to keep it between us."

Brumby nodded. "I understand. And I won't tell anyone."

"Thank you." Harm extended his hand to Brumby, which he accepted and heartily shook.

Mac fidgeted with the phone cord while she waited to be connected to Harriet.

"Hello?"

"Harriet? Hi, it's Mac."

"Mac? Hi! Is everything okay?"

"Yes, of course. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to worry you." She perched herself on the table and sighed. "Harriet, I'm about to ask you something incredibly inappropriate, so please tell me to butt out if you want to. Are you and Bud doing okay?"

"I think so. I mean, we've both been so busy since the baby came. Has he said something to you or Harm?"

Mac took a deep breath. "He's been so down on himself since we've been here. He thinks he's less manly than these people in more combat heavy rolls. We were talking about it tonight, and he implied that the two of you haven't been intimate since AJ was born."

"We haven't been," Harriet confessed. "We're both tired almost all of the time. He tried to initiate it once, but I still felt so uncomfortable in my body so I said no. He hasn't tried since."

"He thinks that this kind of thing lasts for years. And knowing Bud, I don't think he's going to make a move until you do."

"Years?"

Harriet's voice came out as a squeak, which made Mac smile. "That's what he thinks. Listen. When we get home, why don't I babysit for you two some. I can take him for a few hours and you two could have some much-needed time alone."

"Would you really?"

"Of course. He's my godson. Just don't tell Bud about this conversation. I think he would die of embarrassment."

Harriet laughed and promised. "Thanks again for telling me this, Mac. He and I are both really lucky to have you as a friend."

"We're all lucky to have each other."

Mac watched Bud talk to Harriet and grinned. Harm turned to her after his offer of a ride on a tomcat was shot down. "Did I miss something?" She laughed and he smiled at the sound. "Let's give him some privacy and see if our spot is free."

They found the fantail empty and Harm breathed a sigh of relief. As soon as the door was shut, he grabbed her hand and pulled her to him. One hand cupped her head and the other slid underneath her top. This was the last moment they were going to have for a while, and he craved the feel of her skin. His lips met hers, and her mouth instantly opened beneath his. His tongue met hers and both moaned into the kiss. His fingers brushed against the underside of her bra and she gently pushed him away.

"Sorry," he said sheepishly, "I think I got a little carried away." He leaned back in and placed soft kisses from her ear to her collar bone, and grinned at the little sounds she made. After another minute he forced himself to stop. He tightened his arms around her and held her close. He buried his head in her neck, and breathed in her scent. "I'm going to miss you."

"I'm going to miss you too. So much." She pulled back and studied him. She adored everything about this man. She reached into the pocket of her skirt and pulled out a folded piece of paper. She extended it to him, and he smiled at the déjà vu of the moment.

He took the paper and looked down to see his name was written in her elegant script. He looked back at her. "Tell me what it says."

She smiled, remembering the same moment. She leaned against the railing and met his eyes. "It says how much I love you." She bit her lower lip and forced back the tears. "It says that I'm happy I got to see you, even if the circumstances weren't ideal. It says that no matter where you end up career wise, I'll be by your side." A tear escaped and slid down her cheek. "It says that I think you're amazing, and I think our future is going to be better than either of us could have ever imagined."

He slid the note into his pocket and brought his hands to her face. He wiped away the tear with his thumb and then tilted her face to his, and kissed her gently. "I love you."

She covered his hand with hers. "I know. I love you too." They stood for a moment, and then she turned to stare out at the water. "It's not a hotel room in Destin, but I'm glad we've been able to have time alone out here."

He moved to stand beside her and grinned. "When most people are looking for privacy, they're usually wanting to have sex and need real privacy. This is a little too accessible for that."

She glanced at him and raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? And have you had a lot of aircraft carrier sex, Commander?"

"Red light, ma'am." He laughed as she rolled her eyes. "I've actually never had sex on a carrier."

"Really?" She studied him.

He scoffed. "Of course I haven't. Women weren't even allowed to serve on carriers until late 1993, so they were never around when I was flying before. And this time I have you. And I'm definitely not throwing away what we have for a quickie in a supply closet." He took a breath. "I know what happened with us when I was seeing Jordan may make you worry, but this is different. I could never do that to you."

"Harm. I know you wouldn't do that."

He watched her for a minute, and decided to change the subject. "So, what's going on with Bud & Harriet?"

"Apparently for the two of them, a baby means abstinence. Bud doesn't feel very manly since he and Harriet haven't been intimate in a while. And being here around all of you combat types made him feel even less manly. Especially when he heard we're referred to as legal weenies."

Harm winced. "This," he said, gesturing to the ship, "doesn't make anyone more or less of a man. Bud is a damned good man. Better than almost every single one I've met here."

Mac nodded. "You don't need to tell me that. But I took care of it. I called Harriet to tell her how Bud was feeling, and I'm going to babysit more when I get back so they can have some time alone together."

"You're a good friend."

She shrugged off the compliment. "They've been good friends to us. It's the least I can do." She looked up at him and smiled. "AJ is getting big. He's starting to develop his own little personality. It's fun to be around him."

"I hate I'm missing it." His voice was quiet.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to rub it in."

He shook his head. "Don't apologize. It's not your fault." He took a deep breath. "Mac, we've mentioned kids, but never really talked about it. You do want kids, don't you?"

"Of course I do."

He turned to face her. "Even if I'm out here for six months every other year?"

She put her hand on his chest and was silent for a minute while she felt his heart. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "It's not what I imagined when I used to think about having a family. I always hoped my husband would travel less than me, not more. But you're worth the sacrifice."

Harm walked with Mac, Bud and Brumby to the helicopter. Mac was visibly on edge, and doing a poor job of hiding it. Bud was still on a high from his conversation with Harriet and was oblivious, but Mic noticed.

"Anxious to get back to Colonel Farrow, Colonel?" He laughed at her glare, before winking at Harm and excusing himself. He climbed into the helicopter. Bud gave Harm a hug and followed him.

Harm watched the two of them get settled and turned to her. "Travel safe, Mac. Please email me when you get home."

"I will. Take care of yourself, Harm."

"I will." He tugged her into his arms, and held her tightly. "I love you," he whispered into her ear, "and I'll be back before you know it."

"I love you too." She pulled away from him and bit her lower lip. "Bye Harm."

He watched her get into the helicopter and settle in the seat closest to the door. He held up his hand to wave, and stood there as they shut the door and began to lift off. "Two more months," he told himself, "we can do this."

End Part 8