Hello my Beautiful readers! It has been quite a while. This story got nominated for a, I believe a Readers Choice Award. Which I never expected in a million years, especially from this story. Not because I didn't think it was good, but because it wasn't received well, and I didn't think a lot of people liked it. But anyway thank you to whoever did nominate me I am completely flattered and honored. This chapter is a bit, I don't want to say all over the place but, it could have been better. I promise the next chapter, whenever I get it out, is going to do bit better job explaining why Venus is like this why she's having so much anxiety and stress. And we're going to see a little bit more of how her powers work. But that's next time, right now just enjoy what I've given you and sorry for spelling and grammar errors. So enjoy guys, gals, and non-binary Pals.

When I woke up the next morning, I stayed in bed for a few minutes. I thought about the talk I had with Master Splinter last night. I debated whether I should go out or just stay in the concrete room. The room was a safety net, something that was sheltered and protected. I had been in a place like this before, I didn't want to feel protected anymore. I didn't want to feel sheltered from the outside world that I wasn't sure about. So, I put on my mask, walk to the door, took a breath and walked outside.

I made my way to the kitchen. I saw that Mikey was already there. He had tried to get me to talk a few times, and I can admit if I wasn't in the state I was at the time, I probably would have laughed at things he said. I had taken a seat at the table when he noticed me.

"Morning!" He said in a very cheery voice.

"Morning," I said in barely a whisper. It felt awkward.

"You want something to eat?" he asked. "Sure," I said. The whole thing felt a little uncomfortable, but only for me. He moved around the kitchen in a happy manner humming to himself. I continued to sit at the table quietly, unsure of what to do with myself.

"So," he said after a minute, "what's your name?" he asked. I then remembered that no one here knew my name, because last night was the first time I talked to someone.

"Venus de Milo," I said after a short pause.

"Like the statue?" he asked. I nodded. "Exactly like the statue," I said. I was always told I was named Venus de Milo because the goddess was the most beautiful woman ever, and when I was born my mother thought I was the most beautiful things she ever saw. I never really agreed with that.

Not long after I heard a meowing sound. I turned to look at the refrigerator, and my nonexisting eyebrows raised. Mikey saw my confusion and said,

"Oh that just Kitty," and with that, he opened the freezer, and my eyes grew to the size of CDs. In the freezer was cat made of Neapolitan ice cream, and it was alive.

"Ahh, why is your cat made of ice cream?" I asked. Never thought I say that one.

"Well, she was a regular cat but then she got mutated," he said, reaching his hand behind his neck.

"Mhh," I said, not sure on what to say, but heck, I'm a 17-year-old turtle mutant who can use magic, I should have learned by now anything's possible.

After a while, Mikey set some plates and silverware on the table and put a large plate on pancakes. "Thanks," I said. He nodded and I took a few. We ate quietly, after while I heard some come in.

"Morning sis," Mikey said, "Morning," Karai said rubbing her eyes, "Do we have coffee?"

"Yeah, but remember to save some for Donnie. He gets crazy without it," Mikey said pointing to the coffee pot. As she pouring herself a cup of coffee, she saw me. She smiled at me and I smiled back, awkwardly.

"Hi," she said.

"Hi," I said.

"So, I see you left your room," she said. I shrugged, "Well it was leave the room or go crazy, so, you know," she laughed at that one. She took the seat next to me and grabbed some breakfast. After a minute had passed she turned to me and asked. "You have a name?"

"Venus," I said. She nodded and when back her food. In the next ten minutes, the rest of the brothers all came in and noticed I was not in the room I had been in the whole time and that I was now socializing. Donnie seemed relieved that I was eating. The other two boy simple asked my name and that was that. Later at some point, Raph asked me,

"So, where you from?" I didn't say anything at first, I don't know why. Then I said, "Japan," I could feel all their eyes on me.

"Really?" Raph said, raising a nonexisting brow.

"Yes," I said just looking straight forward.

"That's cool," Mikey said, "Where in-?"

"I don't really want to talk about it," I said cutting him off. I looked down and the room was quiet. I felt stiff and tenses. I hated it. After a bit, the family resumed their normal conventions.

When breakfast was done, I offered to help Mikey with the dishes. It felt weird. Not just being in the room with them or trying to talk to them. Everything felt wrong. I couldn't shake it. It felt like something was crawling in my skin. My body wouldn't relax no matter what.

Later, I sat with the brothers and Karai on their couch and watched some cartoon that I really did try to pay attention to. At one point or another, Donnie asked, "Do you speak Japanese and English?"

I nodded, "Yes," I said, "I also speak Mandarin."

"Cool," Mikey said, "That sounds totally awesome."

Just then Master Splinter came into the room. It was time for them to train. I was told to just observer for now.

I could see that all of them took training seriously. But at the same time, they were a bunch of 17-year-old boys and their sister. There was familiar chaos to the dynamic between all of them. I could see the brothers' personalities in their fighting styles.

Leo was calmer and more traditional. Raph was a bit more aggressive and hard. Donnie put thought into his movements. And Mikey well, he was just about everywhere. They were all good, don't get me wrong. But the fought so differently from each other.

Karai was a bit more ahead than them I guess that was because she was a like bit old than the turtles. She seemed to be a bit more intense as well.

I got this yearning feeling in my gut by watching them. I realized then I missed training. I missed the sweat and blood, the pain, the ace in my muscles. I missed being a kunoichi. Badly.

I wanted that back. I wanted my strength back.

When training was done I waited a minute before following the siblings back out to the main area. I watched them interact with one and other, and laugh together. They seemed happy. One big happy family.

XXXXX

That night April came down to the lair. She had with a boy with dark hair and his two front teeth missing. His name was Casey Jones. I mostly just watch the groups conversation. Feeling too awkward to say anything at all. It was like I wasn't really there. As the group of ninjas was behind a screen, and I was there just to watch them.

Then Leo said, "Alright guys let's head out."

"Bye, Venus!" Mikey called as he raced out of the lair. I laughed just a little bit. Before he left Donnie turned to me and asked, "You feeling okay?"

I nodded. Physically, I was feeling better.

Once everyone was gone, the lair was silent and still. I leaned back on the couch and let out a sigh. My body decides that now it would finally allow me to relax. I rubbed my face with one hand and with the other I held on to my amulet. Why was I acting like a freak?

"You seemed troubled."

I jumped at the at the sound of the of Master Splinter's voice. My hand flew to my heart and I let out a gasp. After a second I calmed down and stood up to face him. A minute of silence passed and then I said, "You and your family had been very kind to me. More than I deserve. But I can't help but feel, strange here. I don't know if I really belong. Here if anywhere."

The old rat looked at me for a long time, as if he was studying me. Finally, he turned and said, "Follow me."

He leads us into the dojo and had me sit next to him in front of the large tree. I copied his position, sitting on my knees and having my back straight.

"Close your eyes and clear your mind," Master Splinter told me. Oh, so he was going to have me meditate. I closed my eyes and breathed in through my nose. I tried to relax and let my mind clear so could begin. But I couldn't clear my mind or focus on something else. My mind erupted into a sense of chaos, and anger, and sorrow. It started slow and then it tumbled down and until it was too much. After a while opened my eyes again. I sighed and tried once more. I got the same thing, flashed of darkness in my mind.

"Having trouble?" Master Splinter asked.

I nodded meekly, "There's a reason I stopped doing this. I could clear my mind of focus. My mind would just begin to spiral out of control until I can't take it anymore."

Master Splinter thought for a minute. I felt embarrassed and angered that I couldn't just relax and focus. Was I really that messed up? I had those many problems? I wrapped my arms around myself, biting down on my tongue.

"You need to retrain your mind," Master Splinter said, "and bring yourself back to when you could meditate properly."

"How do I do that?" I asked.

"You practices," he said. We stayed in the dojo for another three hours. By the end, my mind feels a little foggy and still blocked off, but it's a tiny bit better.

I go back to my room and sit on the bed. I look around the room. It's bare and empty. I grab my backpack and empty the contents out on the matters. My old book and journals go in the dark of the nightstand. The few magic items I still have joined them. I slide the small photo album under the bed to be forgotten. There two sweatshirts which I put on the foot of the bed. There also jade come which I place on the nightstand. And at the very bottom of the bag are two things, that didn't fall out, and I don't remember packing. The first was a small doll that was made for me when was a baby. I named her Bell and she had hair made of yarn, and a body made of felt. She could now fit in my closed fist. I set her on the bed carefully.

The last thing was, a hand mirror, made of silver and there were flowers and dragons designs coming from it. I could use both hands to hold it. I know what it was. I was thinking of all the horrible things that could have happened if it had broken. I grab one of the sweatshirts and wrapped the mirror up. I set it too under the bed.

When I sit down on the bed again, I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. I grip the sheets tightly and try and relaxes. My body felt like it was on fire, as though at any moment I would burst into flames. What was I going to do? Now I had another problem to deal with. Do I tell them about it? No, they won't believe me. So I lie? Not forever. My head was spinning and I feel ready to vomit. Oh God why me?

There's a knock at my door. I gasp and come back to reality. I take a few breaths before saying, "Come in."

Mikey stuck his head in, "We're back," he said happily, "And we have dinner. You wanna come?"

I wanted to say no. I wasn't hungry and I didn't want to be out there. I felt sick and tents. But I nodded and said, "I'll be out in a minute."

I forced myself to stand and walk out into the lair, and to the kitchen. I can hear others' laughing and talking. Go in I told myself, but I couldn't. I couldn't move so I just stood out there and listen. I was about to go back to my room but then Leo came out. I froze in horror.

"Hey," he said.

"H-hey," I said. Now I felt like a creep. Did he know I was out here the whole time? Oh, gods, please no. That is the last thing I need.

"I was coming to see if you were coming," he said. I nodded, my words failing me. I felt panicked and scared. I wanted to run to my room and scream into my pillow.

"Come on then," Leo said grabbing my wrist carefully. My brain screamed to pull my wrist back and shove him away from me. I felt like I was going crazy and I don't know why. Then I think back to the mirror. Was it, messing with my mind? Or was this just a whole new set of problems I was having?

When we get into the kitchen I see everyone standing around the table. Karai was sitting on the counter scrolling through her phone. My face heats up, and I'm pretty sure I spaced out for a minute. When I come back, I heard Mikey asked, "You ever had pizza before?"

I looked at him and blinked. "No. No, I haven't"

"Well, that's about to change!" Mikey then handed me a slice of pizza and waited with excitement.

I'll say it was pretty good. I can honestly say, I had never tried anything like it before. As I ate dinner I listen to the group talk about their night. From what I could tell it had been quiet and simple. Or boring as Raph and Casey put it.

After about an hour of sitting quietly, I slipped away, back to my room. I let out a gasp and pulled off my mask. What was I being so problematic? I moved over to the bed and got under the blankets. Today wasn't terrible, I thought, but it was far from good. Tomorrow I'd try harder. I'd try and become healthy so I could train again. I'd try and talk to them. Ask questions about themselves, about New York. All of it. But right now I need sleep. Then maybe in the morning, I could be calm.

XXX

(Third Person POV)

"Where's Venus?" Karai asked after a minute.

"She probably went to her room," Leo said looking up.

"That girl's weird," Raph said, shaking his head a bit.

"Raph come on," April said, a little anger, "This probably all new to her. She might need time."

"But you have to admit, she does kinda act like she sees ghosts all the time," Casey commented.

"Come on," Mikey said, "she nice. She helped me with dishes this morning. I think April's right. I don't think she' used to all this epicness."

Raph then shoved his younger brother to the floor.

"Ow!"

"She probably does need time to adjust to living here," Donnie said, "She's lived in Japan before this and you have to realized the two are pretty different."

"Why does that matter? It's not like she's staying for long. She'll probably leave once she better," Karai said, matter-of-factly.

"No, she will not," Master Splinter said walking in where the group of teenagers was.

"I have asked Venus de Milo if she wishes to stay here, and she expected. Once her body is restored to proper health she will fight alongside you all."

" Are you sure that's the best idea, sensei?" Raph asked, thinking back to how tense and jumpy the female mutant had seemed, "She seems a little bit mental, and not like the best choice for a kon-" before he could finish the red-clad turtle was given a swift hit to the head.

"Do not judge her Raphael," the old master said, " You do not know the battles she has fought or the storms she has faced." he looked at the teenagers. "For now, attempt to make her feel welcome. I'm sure in time she will grow used to life here," and then he turns and left. Karai though for a moment before getting up of the counter and following her father.

"Father," she said. He turned and looked at her.

"Yes, Miwa?"

"When Leo, and Donnie, and I found Venus, she had three bands on her arm. And I had sworn I had seen it before, back when I was with Sheader. The one with the dragon and the stars. Did you see it too?" she asked. Master Splinter nodded.

"Do you know what it is? The way Sheader talked about it was like he had known about it for a long time. I was thinking-"

"I have reason to believe that Venus de Milo wishes to keep her past to herself for now. We must respect that," the girl's father said.

"Then how can we trust her then? Why should we?"

Splinter looked at his daughter for a long moment, "Miwa, this girl has nothing. She had lost her seans of purpose and meaning. She has nowhere to go, and no one to go to."

"So we just let her stay?" the girl asked.

"We let her trust us, so we can see it was right to trust her," Master Splinter said, before leaving her there.