Evidently I'm not that good at posting regularly...I'm 3/4 of the way through the next chapter and will chuck that up soon too :)
Lots of blah about Adrien thinking and feeling in this chapter, Marinette in the next, hopefully some more action coming up after that!
Adrien ducked into the nearby bathroom and released his transformation. He felt slightly disconnected from his body and only automatically held out the piece of camembert for Plagg. His kwami seemed to notice his mood and munched quietly to let his miraculous holder have some time to think.
The words that Ladybug had whispered were obviously not intended to reach his ears and he felt guilty for having heard them. The guy I like… that guy. Adrien leant against a nearby wall and looked up at the roof, resting his head on the hard brick behind him. He had to think logically. There were always three options for someone's feelings, right? Either they liked him, didn't like him, or were somewhere in-between. For his strong Ladybug, he had ruled out the latter because she didn't seem the type to be indecisive about her feelings. That meant she was either into him or not.
She had always pushed him away before but Adrien had always put that down to her passion for saving the city, telling himself that she just wasn't ready to date because she was too busy. If she didn't acknowledge his feelings then she must not be open to anyone else's. Just too busy. Adrien's own father had once instructed him to not have a girlfriend until university, or later if possible, because it would 'take too much time' and he should 'focus on his studies'. Adrien had always assumed that Ladybug felt the same way about the boyfriend thing, because after all she was just as busy as him with school and saving the world.
But now… she had just admitted she liked someone. That meant that she was actually into someone and wasn't ignoring her feelings like he had thought. He considered the possibility that maybe she just had feelings for this guy and wasn't acting on it because she didn't actually have a proper crush on the guy. But he could still see her wistful smile as she had spoken the words, and how her eyes and seemed to gaze off into the distance. He had known then that she was thinking of someone and he had felt his heart break. He would have given anything to have her speak about him that way.
He had to focus. So, she definitely liked someone. Now the two options were that it was him or…someone else. Someone not him. She hadn't said any name, so there was still a small chance it was him. He briefly considered the possibility that it was his civilian form. After all, he had many followers and, as he had found out many times, some of those girls were scarily obsessive. Adrien tried to think if he had seen any girl with those bluebell eyes watching him from the crowds, but no. There were no girls that particularly stood out from there, and Ladybug didn't seem the type to fall for a guy that she didn't know well. That meant that if it was him, she would have to know him closely. Could he have missed her?
There had been a few times when he had reflected on the girls at his school and class, the only girls he knew outside of the people he worked with. Every time he had felt the nagging feeling that he was missing something, like she was there but he just couldn't SEE her.
He put his hands over his face. She could be there, but it was just as likely she wasn't and he was just imagining it and being hopeful. Adrien had considered every girl numerous times and he was sure that none of them were that wonderful woman that made his heart pound every time he saw her. He would have had to notice if she was around. Plus, if she was in his class, she would have noticed him too. She was as smart as she was fair, and she wouldn't have been able to keep such a secret from him.
No, she couldn't be in his class.
That meant that, logically, it wasn't him as a civilian. That left him as a superhero. But he knew deep down that she didn't like him like that. As a final clue, that look into the distance as she had accidently revealed that she liked someone. If it had been him she would have looked at him, not away from him.
And from his damn logic, that left one solution. That guy that she liked just wasn't him.
Adrien heard footsteps approaching, and quickly dropped his hands and looked up to see who it was as Plagg zoomed back into his jacket pocket. He was surprised to see Nathaniel slowly walking towards him, looking concerned.
'Hey, Adrien, are you ok? Did you get hurt?'
Adrien smiled weakly 'Nah, I'm ok.' Apart from feeling like my chest is being crushed by a giant, and wanting to scream and cry… 'Thanks for checking on me. What happened? Is everyone ok?'
Nathaniel didn't seem to believe his 'ok' statement, but continued anyway. 'It was pretty cool actually. Ladybug and Chat Noir accepted his race challenge and then beat him by using the old hedgehog and the something-or-other animal trick and dressing a bunch of blond guys as chat noir. Anyways, he threw a tantrum about losing and attacked them but then they tripped him and turned him back into normal.' He had become pretty animated while telling Adrien of the events, but seemed to remember where he was and calmed down, blushing. 'Sorry, that probably doesn't make any sense.'
Adrien's smile widened at the enthusiasm of his new friend. 'Nah, that's all good I think I get it. Pretty epic really.'
Nathaniel nodded emphatically 'It really was! Anyway, shall we go join the rest of your friends?'
Adrien started to nod and walk out of the room but hesitated. 'Nathaniel, they're not just my friends, right? They're your friends too?'
Nathaniel blushed.
'Well, I…I've never really… I mean I'd like them to be but…' He looked at the floor to hid his face.
'I'd like them to be my friends but I've never really been able to…I don't know, fit in? Nino is kind but he was in his own little bubble before you arrived, Alya is new and I haven't had much of a chance to talk to her, and Marinette…I…I can't seem to talk to her properly. I keep tripping over my words and saying dumb things because my mind just goes blank!'
He looked up and Adrien was surprised to see the fierce determined look in his eyes, shining out from behind his screen of red hair.
'One day I'll be able to say just the right thing and then she...' The look disappeared quickly as he realised what he was saying and who he was talking to. 'I… will be able to be friends with them.'
Adrien felt surprised. He never knew that other people felt like that about his friends, but the more he thought about it the more he began to understand how this other boy felt. Adrien had been lucky to make friends with Nino on his first day but he had no idea just how lucky he was to have Nino become his best friend. And as for the girls, he could understand how Alya's brashness could be intimidating for the shy guy, but he had always assumed that Nathaniel and Marinette were somewhat friends.
In fact, the more he thought about it the more he realised that he had never really seen them speak that much. And when he tried to think about whom else he had seen talking with Nathaniel, he realised that the poor boy had always been on the edge of the group.
Adrien felt a wave of guilt wash over him. The way that he had felt when he first arrived at the school, the first day of not knowing anyone, that was how Nathaniel must feel every day: friendly but not friends, together but alone on the edge. Adrien had been too absorbed in his own world to pay attention to the other people in his class. Sure, he got along well with everyone but he realised that he hadn't made much of an effort to really get to know anyone. For all he knew there were other people who felt like Nathaniel. He had to try to fix that.
'I'm sorry Nath, I didn't know you felt like that. But, I'd like to count you as my friend if I can?' He winced internally at how awkward that sounded but Nathaniel didn't seem to notice. He brightened up and blushed even more. Adrien wondered what Nathaniel and Marinette would be like as a couple, deciding that they would likely just both be bright red the entire time.
'R-really? I would like that.' Nathaniel smiled at him.
Adrien grinned back, and dramatically held out his hand. 'In that case, mon ami, shall we go join OUR friends?'
Nathaniel shook his hand delicately and bowed his head elegantly, replying 'Indeed, good sir.'
They both giggled and left the bathroom. Adrien followed Nathaniel back to where they had been sitting before the akuma attack, thinking that it was a weird place to make a friend but he was glad he had.