Chapter 17:
"What are you still doing awake," Bonnie asked? Sarah flushed. She had finished a half-dozen formulations for Finn's 'kelp-to-food' process. They had four varieties of imitation meat, two varieties of imitation veggie dishes and even a dessert. She was ahead. Nadia and Simone had been teasing her about 'machine-efficiency'. She really was supposed to be sleeping. She'd been working crazy hours and putting strain on both her mechanical and organic systems.
Except she had insomnia.
But androids shouldn't have insomnia, she thought. It should be as simple as plugging in, closing out some processes, and grabbing some z's. But something wasn't working, and she'd been ducking the problem for weeks. The food problem had been a convenient excuse for the long nights and reclusive behavior. She'd sort of gotten to have a reputation for wanting to experience other things when Finn was off working. It was typical to find Bonnibel Bubblegum in bed with her double these days and just as typical to find Sarah feeling up Betty or screwing around with Marceline. But in the last few weeks, the tireless android had been suffering a distinct lack of libido. At least it kind of seemed that way on the surface.
Truth? She was just as horny as before. Trouble was, she had hangups. Sarah Mertens was starting to have real issues with touching and being touched. Even that's not really true, and you know it, she thought. It was the hard logic that defined her existence. She could no more hide from it than Finn could hide from his destiny. She had hangups about the very people she loved most touching her intimately, and this woman was no exception.
Settling at her right, Bonnie gave her a good looking over. Sarah turned away. "When was the last time you slept," the Candy Monarch demanded? The android-girl muttered something. "Sarah," growled Bonnie. "I told you before. You weren't built to run in continuous mode like that. You're wearing your parts out prematurely, and I don't have time to build new ones..." As the tall princess lectured her double on the dangers of overwork, the palace security alarms sounded, cutting off the one-sided conversation. In short order, both women were crowding in at the terminal, trying to type on the keyboard at the same time. Knowing that Sarah was far-faster, Bonnie finally gave over in favor of hovering at the android-woman's shoulder.
"Sector 7," Sarah burbled. The prison. Someone was breaking into the VIP jail. As Bonnie's mind conjured all the deadly dangers of that, Sarah rose as if she was going. "No," Bonnie murmured, as her hand caught the android-woman's shoulder. Sarah glared at her. "Sarah, you're a member of our family, the Royal family," Bonnie reminded her. "Your responsibility is here, not recklessly throwing yourself into fights with unknown invaders." The android's face flushed. She knew that. When there was so much work still to be done, she knew very well that it was foolish to be running off to fight an armed invasion. With a sigh, she turned back to the console and initiated lock-down. The invaders were in Sector 7. She could seal the private spaces of the palace and protect their family.
The alarm woke Drew from a fitful sleep where she tried urgently to revive Finn from a nano-machine-induced coma. For several moments, she lay there in a daze, caught between the terror of the dream and the shock of the alarm. Shaking off the fog, the tall doctor rose and rushed to the door of the infirmary wearing a flannel shirt and panties. Gathering up a hidden weapon, she staked out a position where she could 'light-up' anybody coming into her space. Moment by moment, members of the family arrived. Bon and Frenchie. Fionna and Patrick. Cherry in company with Breakfast of all people. There were two missing. Playing a hunch, the lovely doctor handed her weapon to Bon and went straight across the room to the intercom, her lovely butt wig-wagging sensuously.
Seeing her hubby eyeing his stepmom's ass, Frenchie elbowed Bon sharply, causing Fionna to giggle. It was funny to see that her brother was actually a sensual creature. There were times it seemed like he was 'doin' his duty' with Toast-Face. An oblivious Drew keyed the intercom, and momentarily Sarah and Bonnie's voices were coming through. "They're in the VIP prison," Bonnie explained. "Sarah's watching them..." Everyone knew what that meant.
Indeed Sarah was figuratively watching over their shoulders as the invaders made their way through the prison where Ooo's outlaw royalty hung their crowns these days. Plugged into the security system as she was, she could see them from any and every angle, as they took the prison-block by storm. She was aware of Bonnie talking with the rest of their family, but her thoughts were on the bitches down in the prison. Bon had equipped the prison with sleeping gas, which Sarah herself had promptly switched out for something more... permanent. She had her finger figuratively on the trigger just now, ready to take care of business. There was only one thing stopping her.
Maja was in there.
Finn had given his word that he would keep the witch alive if she helped them defeat the Dipped. Maja had kept up her end of the bargain, and Finn and Fionna were both bound and determined to hold up Finn's. It would be a devastating blow to both heroes if Maja were killed, even in the breach where Ooo's assorted ne'er-do-wells got the axe too. I won't let Wildberry get out, she thought. If it came down to it, she would take her lumps with Finn and Fionna, but Wildberry would never be allowed to escape her prison. Fortunately, that looked like a fight she wouldn't have to have, as the invaders moved straight past Wildberry's containment room and up the hall.
The enemy was well-organized, armed, and equipped. They came with dart-guns, which was dangerous news when Finn had drastically limited the manufacturing and sale of guns after the undead got put down. There should be no stockpiles of guns in unknown hands. Cherry had direct or indirect control of all the guns that were not in a Royal Arsenal somewhere. More to the point, these men wore armor and carried themselves like soldiers.
So who were they?
The android carefully zoomed in, as her creator watched over her shoulder. "Are those...," Bonnie burbled? Slime people. She shivered in fear, and her eyes flicked to the ventilation grate. Even knowing that Theo was out of business, Bonnie felt a trickle of fear. Slime Guards. Here. Hurletta was supposed to be in therapy. Why would she invade the palace? No answer was forthcoming, though. All the two look-alikes could do was watch as the infiltration team sprayed gas into Blargetha's cell, before dragging her out.
And then they moved on to Maja's room.
The following morning, Blargetha awoke from a horrific dream where Finn cruelly abused her, raping her for Hurletta's amusement before turning her over to his soldiers. She'd come to wakefulness just as the King of Ooo personally dragged her, naked, out into the rain to be dissolved and washed away. Awaking with a start, she did her best to clear the cobwebs from her brain.
Sitting up took two tries with her head pounding and her mouth tasting like week-old coffee and donuts. The room she found herself in was dark but not quite pitch-black, and she could feel a faint rumble of something. Engines, she thought. She was on a vehicle, and she was moving. A train, she wondered? As her eyes adjusted to the darkness, she realized she was in a room with walls that curved from floor to ceiling. Airship, she surmised. She was on a Grid-Face Person airship.
The obvious questions were how and who? Princess Nadia was Finn's loyal honey. She'd born him two bastard children. Why would she allow her people to snatch Blargetha out of prison? It didn't make sense? Unless they maybe don't know who I am, she thought. Moving to the door, the slime-person tried the handle, finding the door locked from the outside. She was a prisoner, clearly. She'd been snatched out of Finn's hands by people who might well mean her harm. Her thoughts went back to the phone. Her benefactor might well have been a sham. In her terror at being summarily put to death, she'd latched onto those hopeful messages. It was entirely possible the whole thing was a scam to insure her cooperation. It was even possible Hurletta was behind it all–a pretense for the elder sister to have her killed.
As she pondered what to do, the door was opened. A heavily armed humanoid was on the far side. Blargetha stood there a moment, staring into his hard, implacable face. At least you'll know, she decided. Stepping through, she waited meekly for the guard to step off. Shutting the door, the gruff guard took her by the shoulder and steered her up the hall.
The space was narrow–much more so than the airship she'd been on before. Doors on either side were made of wood and looked much more flimsy than the alloy doors on a Grid-Face Person's ship. Her mind filed away all those little details against the day they might be useful. She could get out of a room with a wooden door. Wood had give to it, and was much less resistant to acid. Getting back to the ground was a bigger problem, of course.
The guard brought her to the head of the hallway. Opening the door there, he shoved her into the room beyond. She found herself in a control booth, roughly twice the size of the room she'd awakened in. She could see out the front windows of the machine. Zeppelin, she thought. No, the Grid-Face people weren't involved here. As the diminutive woman at the helm turned to face her, Blargetha felt a trickle of cold fear. She hadn't seen a wax-person since the so-called 'King of Ooo' swindled Bonnie Bubblegum out of her kingdom. The swindler had met his end in a fire during the Vampire Crisis.
Frowning, the little woman growled, "do you know me?" "No," Blargetha murmured. The lie was apparently convincing enough that the woman troubled herself no further. "My business partner wanted you pulled out of that cell," she said, "for work that suits our purpose." Blargetha kept her expression carefully neutral. This wasn't the rescue she'd hoped for. It sounded perilously like she'd been brought out of the baking pan, only to find she was already in the oven. She'd been prepared to sell her sister out again. She'd been prepared to do any kind of deal it took to keep her skin. So deal, Blargetha, she thought.
"What do you need," the evil genius murmured. "I don't have a kingdom to rule anymore." Lip curling in a sneer, the wax-person replied, "that suits our needs perfectly. We don't need a spoiled little princess-bitch getting airs. What we need is your brain. We need you to... read some ancient texts for us... And maybe try to build some of what's described inside." "Terms," Blargetha burbled? The wax-woman frowned. "What terms are we agreeing to," Blargetha elaborated. Gesturing, she said, "you want weapons. I want freedom. We can come to an agreement." The wax-woman howled laughter.
The stranger laughed and laughed as if her unhappy guest had told the funniest joke in forever. It was a disconcerting response for the fallen princess. Blargetha found herself growing very nervous as her host howled at her. And then the nasty little woman put the knife against her stomach. Blargetha jumped back, but the guards caught her and held her in place. "You don't have to live," said the wax-woman. "We can find somebody else..." "I-I'll do as you say," Blargetha babbled. Nodding, the stranger replied, "I'm sure you will. We'll be landing in two hours. I suggest you make ready."
Back in the Candy Kingdom, the family was gathered in the dining room over a late breakfast discussing the events of the previous night. Even after the invaders had slipped back into the darkness, the family had passed a rather sleepless night in the nursery. Drew was upset about Maja being abducted and disturbed by the second invasion of their home. Sitting there in her underwear, she was balanced on the knife-edge between anger and despair. Bonnie was far more concerned about the possibility that their Treasurer had gone rogue. The Slime Guard had the weapons and training to hit the palace and take Blargetha, and Hurletta had the motivation to launch such a risky gambit.
As the family discussed what to do and how much to tell Finn, Sarah came striding in and tossed a scrap of cloth on the table. "Fake's," she announced. "None of them were slime-folk..." The gathering sat up and took notice. "Emerald-People," the android-woman reported." She'd gotten DNA from the duct they'd used to enter. Bonnie sighed her relief. They wouldn't be at war with Hurletta. With that out of the way, Cherry moved business onward to the weapons the hit team had and Maja's proclivity for 'seeing' Finn's future. That was especially important in light of Sarah's discovery. Hurletta's army was sanctioned to have firearms. There shouldn't be other actors with guns.
"We have a problem," said the Mafia Princess. "All the weapon factories my predecessor had are shut down. Finn shut down the official factories indefinitely. I now think that decision was premature..." Drew frowned at her. That didn't make sense, and she said so. Betty's holographic image volunteered, "in my time, it was common practice for governments to find 'busy-work' for idle weapon builders..." "...because they'll find things to do," Simone murmured.
Bonnie groaned. She'd pushed for that. She'd been insistent that Finn shut them all down because... she was a control freak, and she didn't like the idea of other people having guns. "So someone's paying them," Drew rumbled. "Do we know who's involved?" "I have six men who are known to me who may be involved," said Cherry. "Enough for maybe a small batch," sighed Bonnie. "Those weapons looked too well made for craft work, Cherry..." They had a factory running somewhere with a staff of unemployed gunsmiths.
Decisively, the pretty princess said, "we quash this until we know more. Cherry's on finding this illegal factory. You have a week." Rolling her eyes at the woman's imperious demeanor, Cherry turned to Simone, "how dangerous is Maja's condition? Really?" With a sigh, the Ice Queen replied, "marginal. The Quicksilver Curse shields Finn and those near him. She can't see more than maybe an hour into his future." Cherry reminded the Minister for Magic, "you spoke of her using her powers to find the Fire Bleeder. Could someone use her to find the monster again?" Simone took a deep breath, and it was clear this was an angle she hadn't foreseen. She was all but squirming. Blowing out that breath, the Grand Master admitted, "it's possible..." Turning to Bonnie, Cherry said, "I think that trumps the guns..." Nodding, Bonnie agreed.
That left them with the most important matter. "So," murmured Phoebe. "Do we tell Hurletta...?" "We have to, Phoebe," Cherry replied. The room erupted, but Boniface quelled the turmoil. "She's right," he said. "Princess Hurletta is a close ally. While I do not believe that Blargetha went of her own accord, the optics look poor. We have to do better." Bonnie nodded. "Ok," she said. "I'll do it..." The business got divided up just like that. With business decided, the family meeting broke up.
Cherry headed out immediately. Fast on her feet for such a little shit, she was halfway down the hall, and Star and Boniface had to catch her. "I don't agree with you going," Star announced. All the moms were supposed to be ending the adventures. Cherry's dark eyes stared into the younger woman's eyes, conveying hidden hopes and fears. Bon opined, "you won't be around to correct your karmic debt if you continue to pursue these risky endeavors..." The fallen attorney glanced away. Calmly, Star declared, "Thor and Patrick will go..." With a sigh, Cherry nodded. She liked that no better. Thor and Patrick had wives and children. Spinning her around, Star reminded her, "you've got three young kids to manage. We can share this risk." "Alright, Star," the gangster murmured. "We'll play your way."
Well, Blargetha's finally met her 'rescuers'. Out of the rain and into the rushing river.