Chapter 27:
"Alexia," Cherry greeted the Laurel Princess. "Ms. Soda," Alexia replied. Nominally they were allies, but they weren't friends. Billy could feel the chill. "What brings you to my lands," Laurel Princess asked? "There's an illegal weapon factory here," Cherry responded. Alexia gave her an ironic look, and the little woman amended that to, "an unsanctioned illegal factory..." That was different. Beginning to walk away from the prying ears, Alexia murmured, "do we know where?" Billy relaxed momentarily. It appeared they weren't going to get to blows today.
Olesia appeared just then, lighting the world with a sunny smile. Billy returned that smile. They had all been a little uncomfortable while cooped up in Lina's vehicle for the last week or so. If it wasn't the serial abuse Thor was getting from Star, it was Patrick's moping over the impending ass-kicking he was going to receive when he got home to Fionna. If Patrick moping didn't cover the water front, they had Tom moping over missed chances. And that led into Olesia's infatuation and Lina's irritation with Billy. As he was about to speak to the elemental, a voice from behind reminded him of just why Lina wasn't speaking to him. "Billy," squealed the Lizard Princess. Like one of his childhood wrestling heros, Hamest jumped off the top step of the boarding ladder and tackled him, nearly knocking him down.
Ostensibly here to search the underground antiquities markets for the material stolen from her library, Hamest had been a clingy, irritating problem the whole trip. Olesia said, "I'm going to stretch my legs..." Hamest took Billy's hand and went striding off in the other direction. Leo Pedersen found himself laughing. At least he laughed until Lina cussed him. He was a little irritated that she seemed to be blaming Billy Mertens for something that clearly wasn't his fault. What was he supposed to say? Fuck off and go home? If anybody was to blame, it was the mad women who'd put him in this bind.
Tom stepped out of the truck then. As Lina bustled around, checking bits and pieces of their ride for damage, the thief sat down on the stairs. "You look like you lost your best friend," opined the soldier. When Tom flinched, Leo said, "I'm not going to judge or rub your face in it..." "My old boss wants a cut of the money the princess paid Stanislaus," Tom muttered. Leo goggled at him. "Uh, that doesn't make sense," the Froyo-person burbled. "He's saying it's income and I have to pay street-tax," Tom spat. He was, once again, looking at getting beat down–maybe dead–for his gambling habit. Lina told him, "maybe it's time you changed, tovarisch..." Leo nodded. "Change your stars, mate," he said. "It's a big world..."
Miles away, the notorious Huntress stepped down off a wagon, clutching her backpack. She was sick. Again. This was not the fucking time, but she was screwed. Fucked-up again, Emeraude, she thought, as she headed off up the street. There was a hotel up ahead. If she could get into her room, she could deal with the nausea.
That had been her every-day for the last couple weeks. Get up in the morning. Manage sickness. Get something down if she could. Get on the next wagon or train or boat going in the direction of Emerald Kingdom. Hang on, best she could, until the wagon or train or boat stopped. Puke over the side if she couldn't. Get lunch down, best she could before jettisoning that in the afternoon. Then get dinner down. She was a mess. The only thing keeping her going was the certainty that she was broke. She had no more money to invest in a project that seemed endless. How did you draw the whole of a people up to a level where they were actually prospering? She didn't know, and that was becoming a terrifying proposition.
Sliding down behind her, the wizard's bodyguard hustled to catch up. Behind them, Gemma took her time. Taking out a phone, she stopped and sent a text. They were days–maybe hours–away. The irritating wizard-woman suspected not a thing. She'd be Matriarch. She would still be Matriarch. She just had to arrange to silence a few irritating cunts first. Apolline would be the most trouble. Auda could probably be bribed to look the other way, but Apolline fancied herself as being above their crude past. Ironically, one of Gemma's own allies would be the next most troublesome. Clarice fancied herself as a power-broker because she had money. The bitch had far more money than she had sense. Of course, Gemma wanted that money. That giant wad of cash would buy a lot of her vice of choice. Shaking herself, the evil woman sent a second text before shouldering her bag. Her erstwhile mistress would wonder why she was so slow if she kept dawdling. They had a ferry to catch in the morning.
The sun was starting to peek over the horizon when Lina rolled down into the seedy town that hosted the ferry the following morning. Cherry had spent most of the night in hushed conversation with Alexia. As a Crowned Royal with a vested interest in the business, Hamest had gotten dragged in whether she wanted to be or not. Billy had gotten a break from the pawing–and Lina's sharp tongue. As the evening wore on, the family had actually relaxed enough that Star fell asleep in Thor's arms, giving Billy hope she would cut the poor mook some slack.
In the moment, though, everybody was on alert. All roads were leading to Emerald Kingdom. The thugs who'd tried whacking Billy were from here. Signs they'd jointly uncovered suggested Nieve was here. And the guns used to raid their homes had their origin in Emerald Kingdom. Alexia was very nervous, and Billy hardly blamed her. She had the threat of hordes of angry, starving peeps coming out of the wastes, and Aysun appeared to be creeping.
Billy was standing in the top hatch as Lina pulled up to the ferry docks. He could see the glittering spires of the Emerald City on the far side of the neck. Things could possibly get a little crazy when they crossed the sea into Emerald Kingdom. Depending on just how deep Aysun was in things, they could run into trouble real damn fast.
As the young man scanned the scene, his eyes glimpsed a dangerous new wrinkle that sent a chill of cold fear through him. Moments later, the big man had the side door open and he was tearing down the stairs. As his bewildered companions stared, Star raced off after him. She found Billy confronting a shockingly familiar figure in the middle of the vast crowd waiting on the ferry.
"Mom," Billy murmured? As the others watched, Billy Mertens rushed up and snatched the masked woman off her feet, enfolding her in a bone-crushing hug. Bill kissed the little woman on her cheek before letting her down. Before her feet had touched the ground, Star was hugging her. Gemma was a little shocked to see tears in the nasty bitch's eyes as Emeraude Mertens uttered a heartfelt, "my babies..." Shaking off his surprise and delight, Billy asked, "what're you doing here?!" A scant moment later, Cherry opined in ironic tones, "I was wondering the same thing."
The fallout was immediate. Cherry unilaterally canceled both her own trip and the Matriarch's trip across the neck to Emerald City, threatening to sanction anyone who disobeyed in the name of the Privy Council. An hour later, the entire group was gathered in the swankiest hotel room on the west side of the neck for a rather unpleasant 'catch-up' session, with Emeraude front-and-center in the gathering. News that she was going to the same location on the far side of Emerald City as their own destination had Cherry ready to slap her.
"Have you lost your damned mind," demanded the crime boss? "Did you not get the warning I sent..." She was up and pacing now. She had Billy's undivided attention. He'd known nothing about a warning! Wringing her hands in irritation, the little woman paced up and back, while the Matriarch sat in the hot-seat, and her idiot councilor typed away on her phone. "It's not like I was going into the bad-lands," Emeraude muttered. The Emerald Kingdom was supposed to be one of the civilized kingdoms and thus safe. Glaring at her, the Mafia Princess reminded her, "there is no safe place for us, Emeraude. What the hell were you thinking?"
Those words had Bill sitting up and taking notice. His eyes searched the crime-boss's furious face. He was surprised to realize that, under the anger, there was a very real fear. Glancing away, the Matriarch muttered, "I had some business there." "So you've said," growled Cherry. "What was it? What're you doing here?" "We were here to conduct a transaction for the Grey Forest," Gemma declared. "I don't think that's any of your..." "Shut your fucking mouth," Cherry growled. "If I want to hear from you, I'll tell you to talk." The skinny nymph shut her mouth. With a sigh, the Matriarch said, "there was a request to open a franchise..." It took a moment.
"There's no men who would be seeking a franchise without my permission," an exasperated Cherry growled. "Emeraude, you know better!" Cherry had shut down the illegal prostitution racket. She'd killed it and made the capos like it. The only people who should be looking to do it from the underworld were sick fucks who liked hurting women or kids. They wouldn't be meeting with anybody who could leak the deal back to the Boss of Bosses. The only thing this little junket could be was a trap. The Huntress flushed to her hair at that exposition. She'd been in and out of the gangs, working as a hitter for enough gangsters that she indeed should have known better. It was wishful thinking. It was a way to get some money into the coffers.
"It was a way to make some money," the Matriarch muttered. She was unusually defensive about that. Billy could tell his mother was in duress because she was about as unlikely to be on the defensive as his dad was to hit a woman for the fuck of it. She's never liked the sex-trade, Bill, the big man thought. She'd done all she could to keep Star and Fionna away from it–to the point of throwing her own mother out of town. Emeraude Mertens wouldn't want anything to do with profiting from other women's misery. Coolly, Cherry murmured, "if you need money, Emeraude, you could have asked..." At the nymph's frown of suspicion, Cherry said, "I have things that I need that don't involve evil, dear. And there's others of us who need things too."
Now the crime boss's eyes fell on Gemma. "Who did you speak to," she growled? Putting down her phone, the skinny wood-nymph replied, "they were Emerald Kingdom folk. You know they've only got two or three names between them..." Billy flushed. He'd thought that himself a couple of times. It often seemed like every guy out of Emerald Kingdom was Achmed or Aziz. It was an awful thought–one he'd never have given voice to himself. At the same time, that snarky reply almost made him laugh.
"Alright," said Cherry. Turning to Thor, the little woman said, "please escort my colleague to the airfield. Take some cash and buy them a flight home. Today." The Huntress shot to her feet, but Cherry was implacable. "You're going home, Emeraude," growled the Boss of Bosses. "If I find out who summoned you here, I'll have their balls cut off. Get out." Just like that. Emeraude Mertens subsided. With a nod, she hefted her pack and turned to go. Thor hustled to follow. He was in hock, and he didn't need to make that situation worse.
Behind him, he left a family in turmoil. "It was a trap," Cherry muttered, as she began to pace again. "Somebody's playing a game here." Billy's face twisted in a frown, and Star's expression showed worry. "We caught it, honey," Cherry murmured. "By Glob's will, we caught her before she stepped into the trap, but something dangerous is afoot here. Somebody went to a lot of trouble to get the Matriarch of the Grey Forest here, when there's thousands of women willing to sell it for little or nothing..." And that didn't even get into the slave trade. "You think someone wanted her specifically," Billy rumbled. "I think somebody wanted a member of this family, Bill," Cherry muttered. "They weren't going to get a Nadia Ivanova or a Bonnibel Bubblegum." A princess wasn't going to just walk into their hands.
Billy turned and glanced in the direction his mother had gone. Emeraude was uniquely vulnerable in her current situation. She alone had both the motivation and the contacts that would have lured her here. "I'll warn the others," Cherry announced, her tone suggesting she knew what he was thinking. Billy nodded. They had bigger fish to fry at the moment, but his dad would have to do something about the Grey Forest. His mom was getting swept away.
Outside in the street, Gemma continued to type into her phone, even as the crime-boss's moronic thug tried to get his bearings. She'd been damned close. She'd been close to getting rid of the obstacle blocking her from the Matriarch's seat and getting Móguĭ off her back at the same time. Still, she did have other options. "Well," growled Emeraude? She was glaring at the thug. "It's this way," said Thor. "I think." Rolling her eyes, the wizard stepped off. "We passed it on the way in," she muttered. Throwing an angry glance over her shoulder, she snapped, "Gemma!" The nymph hit send on the location of her annoying mistress's wayward child. A pregnant girl would make a nice hostage. She'd be the gift that kept on giving when she finally popped. In the now, the evil wench hustled to catch up.
Thor returned to find the family scheming on what they were going to do next. This whole business was starting to look like one giant trap. Cherry didn't like the way the trail here for Billy seemed almost like bread-crumbs. He'd gone from investigating the slickest kidnaping she'd seen in many a year to a pack of thugs who were too stupid to send somebody who could handle business. Penny's thugs had nearly killed the ice-wizard in the no-man's land between the Candy and Froyo Kingdoms. They'd cornered Billy the Human with little more than a shock-stick and their wits. Every attempt on Billy's crew on the hunt for Nieve almost felt like comic-relief from Cherry's viewpoint.
Didn't feel like a joke to me, Billy thought. Still, he had to admit she was right. They hadn't gotten better. It would have made more sense if the men they faced down got more skillful and powerful. Instead, they'd had a steady diet of dopes willing to throw down for chump change who almost seemed not to realize just who the hell they were dealing with. Our enemy didn't tell them, Billy thought. They were set up to die. The thought was awful at the same time it was illuminating. Now, as his mind went down paths that he hadn't really tread in a long while, he had an epiphany.
"Aysun's behind this," he said, "or somebody close to her." When Star might have spoken, Cherry shushed her. "Go on," she said. "She wasn't keen on having to take orders from dad," Billy remarked. "She was really pretty pissed. She was in it up to her eyes with Berry-Bitch in the Lich War, and she was pretty close to them in the civil war after that. Nieve isn't on our side either. Not really. We smashed her kingdom. I smashed it. At least whatever my brother's zombies didn't fuck up. She and Aysun have common ground..." "Aysun has a nephew," muttered Star.
Every face there swivelled to hers. With a sigh, the little nymph said, "he hit on me a month after the Dipped got put down. He was sniffing around, maybe looking for chances to creep on their neighbors when we met. He suggested keeping me as a fuck-toy. I... don't think he knew who I was." "More to the point, he's somebody Nieve could marry," Olesia opined. "She may have been the suitor Nieve snuck off to meet. That makes sense, Princess Star." Star blushed at being called a princess. At the same time... It was true. Just like her mom, she had to get used to that weird change in status. Her life might very well depend on it. Cherry turned to Bill, who laid out Olesia's theory. Nodding, Cherry agreed, "it fits. It fits the other puzzle pieces."
Returning to her chair, Cherry sat herself and spent a while deep in thought. When Tom might have spoken, Star waved him to silence. After a long, long while contemplating the depths of the scheme, Cherry announced, "they didn't know you, Bill. At least they didn't know you were the one who was coming. They expected some patsy they could cream. When they got you, they had to rethink their plan. I think... I think that's when they started laying breadcrumbs." "To get me here," he agreed. Someone was waiting on the far side of Emerald City to ambush them, and the Emerald Princess might or might not be in on the scheme. It didn't matter if she was or wasn't. There seemed to be powerful people in her circle who were.
On the far side of the Neck, a glittering Grid-Person airship came swooping out of the sky, descending on the Emerald City in a spray of dust and smoke. Waiting on the airship there in the palace square were a handful of figures in the signature all-enveloping robes of the Emerald Folk. As the ramp came down, a tall, bear-like man came down the ramp with a slim, slinky figure at his side. Finn the King's eyes took in the sight of the square and a surge of melancholy regret filled him, as he remembered. The last time he'd danced with Maja had been here in this palace.
Shaking off the unpleasant feeling, the big man strode forward, looking natty in a beautiful silk suit. The effect was offset by the somewhat jarring appearance of the heavy, bearskin hat he wore. Strangely, combined with his many scars, that lent an air of danger to the visitor. He was a mass of dangerous contradictions and nothing like the ugly, uncouth thug that Princess Aysun had grown up with. If anything, Finn Mertens had become more of a man. In spite of or because of the fact that he'd never really changed, he'd somehow become much more than he had been, and that realization shocked the aging princess.
"Princess Aysun," he greeted her. No bow. She wasn't used to that. He'd always bowed, and she wasn't used to having this man, who'd been their dog, lording it over her. Teeth gritting, the angry princess rumbled, "and how may I help the King of Ooo?" Finn the King motioned for her to walk with him, as he stepped off. "There are men here making dangerous moves," he said. Her face snapped up to his. His expression was that eerie, serene expression that she'd seen in Bonnibel's palace. He was simply talking about something that was. No real problem at all. They were going to find these troublemakers and shut them down. That was all.
And Finn is in the house...