As everything settled down. Their excitement to be exact. They talked for a bit until the train came to a complete stop. The two young adults felt a bit of a distance between each other, which saddened them in a way, but both understood the reason. A deep sigh escaped both of their lips before they stood to get off the train.
"Thank you for understanding." Rose looked up at Jacob sheepishly, "And... I'm sorry for starting something and stopping midway..." She chuckled faintly, her face becoming hot by the rememberance of what occurred not that long ago as she placed strands of her hair behind her ear, looking down.
"No need for apologies, Rose." He smiled faintly, "I should actually be the one thanking you." Jacob chuckled, rubbing the back of his head, hiding his look of embarrassment, "Thank you for realizing something I kept turning a blind eye on..." He looked down, sighing lightly, "I... I just never understood my reasoning of discomfort with my sister until just recently... and with your statement, I think you're right..." He looked at her with gentle eyes, smiling softly, "I'll put effort into resolving the issue my sister and I appear to have before it worsens. Thank you..." Jacob kissed Rose's cheek softly before waving her off.
"I'll see you when everything is settled. Until then..." She smiled, waving good-bye.
"Indeed. Until then..." Jacob sighed deeply, watching Rose walk away until she slowly disappeared in the distance, "She's right..." He said to himself, clenching his hands tightly, preparing himself to come forward to Evie, "Hm...? Why is my journal on the floor...?" He questioned himself, shaking off the curiosity by placing it under his pile of papers.
Jacob was a little nervous so he went to the restroom to splash his face with water to wake himself up enough to be prepared for the worst. He sighed deeply, looking at himself in the mirror, feeling pathetic as ever. The young man dried himself with a towel, exiting the restroom walking down the boxcars.
Jacob walked towards Evie's room, slowly opening the door, checking to see if she was feeling any better. Once he walked in he noticed she was still asleep. A faint sigh left his lips before walking up to her quietly, placing her blanket up to her shoulders. He sat beside her, examining her sleeping face before looking away, thinking of how to clear things up with her. Jacob looked back at the sleeping Evie, suddenly noticing her face turned pale. Deep concern crossed him as he placed his hand on her forehead, feeling she was burning up. He panicked. The young man grabbed a rag and damped it with cold water, placing it gently on her head. As he did, he jolted after being grabbed by Evie.
"E-Evie... goodness, you scared me." Jacob chuckled, catching his breath, "Seeing as to how you're awake, I need to check your tempature and prepare you soup. Also, you need to-"
"Jacob... we need to talk..." Evie sat up, getting out from under her blanket, her hand still holding his.
Jacob sat there for a moment, dumbfounded by the sudden statement, "Yes, but after you feel better, Evie." He was about to get up until Evie pulled him back down, "Evie I need-"
Evie held up her hand, signalling him to stop talking, "Jacob... I'm not sick, I'm just... getting over a slight hangover." The young woman stated, "All I needed was water to rid this small migraine from my absurd amount of drinking. I'll be fine, Jacob." She chuckled lightly, looking away.
"Of course you do." Jacob shook his head with a snicker, "You always forget to take it easy when it comes to alcohol. Trying to show you have a high tolerance, when you most certainly do not." His snicker turned into a laugh, making Evie join in before they both fell silent.
"Also... I need to have a little chat with you about... us." She looked up at him with a look of seriousness, "And about Rose."
"Us...? And what does Rose have to do with this? Where are you getting at, Evie?" Jacob tensed up by the sudden words.
Evie sat there silently for a moment, looking at her shaking hands before looking up at her brother, "For starters, I'd like to ask if..."
"If...?" Jacob questioned.
"If you love her?" She looked up at him, trying to keep herself together.
"Her...? Whom are you talking about?" Jacob asked.
"You know exactly who I'm talking about!" Evie suddenly raised her voice.
"I'm sorry sister dearest, but no, I do not know who in the world you're talking about!" Jacob rose his voice right after, "Mind clarifying?"
"The woman at the bar! Rose Moore! Ring a bell?!" Evie looked at him slightly infuriated.
Jacob sat there, falling silent as he looked away, "I don't know my position with her, Evie." He mumbled, "But I will admit, there is no seriousness between us because of the position we happen to be in." He sighed faintly, "So no, Evie... I don't..." Jacob looked back up at her.
Not yet, at least... He thought to himself with a sigh of irritation.
"Okay..." Evie responded lowly, looking slightly relieved, though still recalling a scene she is trying to erase from her mind as she continued onward, "Now... I'd like to apologize to you about something I rarely ever do..." She stared at him, too nervous to continue.
"What must you apologize for, eldest sister?" Jacob tilted his head, curious.
"I... The reason I'm wanting to talk to you is not just because of the cold shoulder you've been giving me since the day of my wedding, but because of something I happen to have come across reading..." Evie fiddled with her fingers for a moment, looking down at her hands soon clasping together.
"Oh? And what was it you happened to have come across?" Jacob crossed his arms, an eyebrow raised as his eyes narrowed into suspicion, hiding his feel of nervousness.
"I... I happened to have read something I feel utterly sorry for intruding on." Evie looked up, her eyes saddening before slowly closing to build up courage to confess on what she has done.
"Evie, just come forward with it already! What is it that you have-"
"I read your journal!" She spat out, her heart racing furiously from her anxiousness.
"Excuse me...? Mind running that by me again, oh sister of mine?" Jacob froze as he asked.
"I... I read your journal..." Evie could barely look at him.
"Well... that explains how I found it on the floor earlier..." He chuckled faintly, shaking his head, "How far have you read, dearest sister?"
"I... I read up until... August nineteenth." She tucked her head slowly under, between her shoulders, trying to hide like a turtle as she prepared herself for a huge lecture from Jacob she never once expected to go through before in her life.
"Of what year...?" He growled, his teeth gritting from a blend of annoyance and embarrassment.
"Eighteen... sixty-six..." Evie mumbled.
"Christ... you have got to be joking me..." Jacob scoffed, stuck between the feeling of anger and embarrassment.
He stood up, his hands clenching tightly as his heart began to race. The young man didn't know how to react to what Evie just confessed. Jacob paced back and forth, trying to think of something to say, but nothing came to mind. He was flabbergasted by what he just heard. The young man covered his reddened face.
"Jacob, I'm sorry I-"
"Save it!" He shouted, "Well..." He chuckled with disbelief, "Seeing as to how the cat is out of the bag, I assume this clears everything up already." Jacob glared at Evie.
"No, it doesn't, Jacob!" Evie began, "It just leads me to wanting to ask more of the meaning of this!"
"Isn't it obvious already?!" Jacob yelled out, marching up to her, "You read my journal! It answers practically everything, Evie! What more do you need?!" He growled, leaning in towards her with a scowl.
Evie stiffened by the sudden closeness, barely able to breathe, putting effort into responding to his words, "It doesn't answer one of my questions..." She whispered, looking straight down, hiding her flustered face.
"Oh? And what exactly might that be, Evie? Hm?" He responded with a growl, practically right near her ear.
"When did this all start...?" Evie questioned, looking up.
Jacob's jaw tightened by the question. He remembered exactly when it all occurred, wanting to pretend he completely forgot, denying it ever happened, but he thought to himself on what the use of lying was for him seeing as to how Evie basically found evidence. He groaned with frustration as he closed his eyes tightly, turning away from Evie, hanging his head in shame while rubbing the back of his neck, resting his other hand against his waist. Evie waited for a response, her anxiousness increasing by the wait. Jacob turned and peered into Evies eyes as he opened his mouth slightly, trying to find the right words.
"It started..." Jacob covered his mouth with his hand, having difficulty continuing, "...It started ever since the very first time I saw you at your most vulnerable state."
Evie looked at him, not recalling ever becoming vulnerable in her life.
"Heh... of course you wouldn't recall such an eventful moment..." He scoffed, looking aside as he shook his head, covering his lips slightly, cupping his chin, "It happened when we were six about to turn seven..." Jacob began.
Nineteen years ago...
"Grandmother! We're home." Young Evie called out while entering their grandmother's home, "Grandmother...?"
"I bet she's just resting again." Young Jacob said, taking his hat off, placing it in his coat and kicking his boots off to the side.
Evie walked down the halls, leading to their grandmothers room. She wasn't there. Jacob went to the living room to see if she was resting on her rocking chair. She wasn't there either. They went to the kitchen, wondering if she was baking like she usually does when the children are out. She wasn't there either. They began to worry, hoping to at least find a note, but nothing. Evie went to the restroom, seeing if the door was closed. It was, meaning she would most likely be in there. She knocked, hoping their grandmother was there. No answer. Evie knocked again. Still no answer. The young lass knocked one more time. Still nothing.
"I'm going to open the door." Evie spoke aloud.
"Evie! It's rude to open the door when someone's using the restroom!" Jacob grabbed her arm, stopping her in her tracks.
"When did manners ever matter to you, Jacob?" Evie questioned with a scoff.
"I beg your pardon? I've always had manners—"
"Says the boy who leaves things around, burps at the table, practically proving his lack in table manners. Oh, and let's not forget the time you were a peeping Tom on—"
"Alright, alright... proceed... goodness..." Evie chuckled at his reaction.
Jacob released her and looked away, practically silently saying by expression, fair point... rubbing the back of his neck, hiding his flustered face after his sister reminded him the time he climbed a tree, accidentally seeing their next door neighbors wife get undressed. Evie chuckled, shaking her head after noticing her embarrassed brother. Once all her giggles were let out, she cleared her throat and opened the door slowly, peeking through the door that was ajar.
"Grandmother!" Once Evie opened the door she saw their grandmother lying on the floor near the sink.
Evie bolted and dropped to the floor, grabbing her, gently shaking her, hoping she would wake, but nothing... Evie placed her index and middle finger against their grandmothers wrist, hoping to feel a pulse, but there was no pulse... the kids were in utter shock as silence filled the air. Within a matter of seconds, Jacob bolted.
"I'm going to get a doctor!" He shouted as he left the house.
Evie sat there, their grandmother resting her head on Evie's lap. The young lass was shaking by the feel of horror crawling its way through her skin. She didn't want to believe the sight of their dead grandmother, hoping it was all just a horrible nightmare, but it sadly wasn't one. Evie didn't wake up. This moment was real. This horrifying moment led Evie to suddenly bawl without her even realizing it, automatically covering her face to hide her tears that kept overflowing to the point of where everything was blurry.
"The doctor is on his way, Evie—?!" Jacob froze by the sight of his eldest sister crying her eyes out, "Evie!" He ran towards her, wrapping his arms around her, placing one hand on the back of her head while the other wrapped around her back, holding her close, "It's okay Evie..." Jacob cradled Evie gently, trying to calm her down, not knowing what else to say, so he just let her cry in his arms.
"Jacob... why...?" Evie whimpered, burying her head in the nape of his neck, "She was doing just fine yesterday!" She muffled into his shoulder, trying to wipe away the tears that just continued to overflow.
"I know... I know, Evie..." Jacob spoke calmly and quietly, "This world... can be cruel sometimes, but... she's in..." Jacob had difficulty finishing his sentence, knowing it would hurt them more, but forcefully said it, "She'll be fine now..." is all he could end up saying.
Evie continued to bawl on his shoulder. Jacob held her tightly, showing she's not alone. A tear slid down his cheek, but he wiped it away quickly, trying to stay strong for his eldest sister even though he was feeling just as sad. He rocked her back and forth slowly, hoping it would help. By impulse he placed his lips on her head, pressing his lips gently on her hair, showing he's there for her and that he loves her.
Jacobs heart suddenly skipped a beat, leading him to place his hand on his chest for a quick moment, questioning himself on why that suddenly happened. He shook his head to clear it, ignoring the feeling just so he could put full focus on comforting Evie. Evie was the most important person at that moment. The young lad stroked her hair softly as she slowly fell asleep in his arms by exhaustion of crying. The doctor arrived and Jacob looked up at him, pointing out their grandmother. That was the time she passed away. As heart breaking as it was for Jacob to the point of wanting to cry with Evie, he stayed strong for the sake of her.
Once their grandmother was being carried out, Jacob stood up, putting all his might into holding Evie in his arms, carrying her to their bedroom. He set her down gently and fell to the floor, landing on his knees, sitting there, looking at Evie's sleeping form. She looked exhausted. As Jacob was about to get up to grab her some extra blankets, Evie pulled on his shirt, mumbling , please... don't go... in her sleep. Jacob jolted by the grab, but sighed lightly and barely placed a small smile on his face as he looked at his eldest sister. Some tears escaped her eyes, sliding down her cheeks. The young lad felt a piercing pain in his chest after seeing his saddened sister. He sat on her bedside, wiped the tears away softly as he began to stroke her hair gently.
"I'm here, Evie..." Jacob smiled faintly, "I'll always be here for you..."
He kissed her forehead gently, not even realizing until it happened. His face suddenly became flushed as he looked away, wondering to himself on why he did that. He peeked over at Evie and noticed a warm smile slowly cross her face as she snuggled up to him in her sleep. Jacob felt an odd feeling inside his chest, but brushed it off as he lied beside her, continuing to comfort her as, he too, drifted off into a deep slumber with her in his arms.
Present Time...
The room was silent that all you could hear was the train engines and the items rattling. Jacob looked away, scratching the back of his head, trying to make himself less uncomfortable, but failing, of course. Evie stared at her hands that clenched each other tightly, burying them between her legs. The silence was so painful to where Jacob gave in and broke it.
"That's... that's when it started..." He mumbled.
Evie looked over at him, signaling him to sit down beside her, beginning to question, "Do... do you still do...?"
"Do... What?" Jacob questioned, a little lost.
"Still... love me in that kind of way..." she looked at him blankly, trying to calm her pounding heart as she waited for an answer.
Jacob was silent for several seconds before gathering up all the courage he had to look over at Evie. Once his eyes met hers, he closed his eyes slowly. He tried to control his racing heart that was beginning to become heavy as he took a deep breath, exhaling slowly. As he became a little calmer, his jaw tightened as he nodded his head slowly, having his heart answer for him. Jacob kept his eyes shut tightly, awaiting for a lecture to begin, but it didn't. What happened was something he least expected and that being a feeling of soft lips brushing gently against his. His eyes fluttered open by the feel, throwing him completely off guard when he saw Evie's face become pink as she backed away slowly.
He felt as though his heart stopped by the sudden feel. Jacob was in utter shock. The young man was wondering if this was a dream. He didn't know how he should feel after that sudden kiss. Shocked because it was Evie? Happy because it felt as though their feelings were mutual? Shameful since it was his sister? Less than a second later, he leaned towards her, placing his lips gently on hers before opening his lips ever so slightly to deepen it, throwing those questions and his moral out the window as his dreams of longing for her touch became real.
Evie was just as shocked, but she didn't push him away. She was lost and wondering why this is happening? Why she kissed him? Why she's letting him kiss her? But she ended up doing the same, throwing everything out the window, just focusing on the kiss that felt endless.
Evie rested one of her hands on Jacobs cheek, while she wrapped her arm around the back of his neck, pulling him closer to her. Jacob leaned in, lying her down, putting his weight lightly on her as he placed one hand on the back of her neck while placing his arm around her lower back. The young man ended up lying on top of her, resting one arm on her bed as his other hand slid its way down lower, passing her butt, holding onto her upper thigh, pulling her up against him. Evie cupped his face, turning her head slightly to make the kiss deeper and passionate. Their tongues tangling and dancing together as they slowly began to grind against each other lightly, their excitement heightening. Jacob made a trail of kisses, leading his way down to the nape of her neck, biting into it, making her hiss from the feel of pain turning into a feel of pleasure.
As their feeling of arousal grew, Jacob separated their lips, opening his eyes, seeing Evie right before his eyes. His heart tightened after seeing Evie, suddenly feeling guilt take over. He bit his bottom lip as he closed his eyes, turning his head aside, looking away as he gripped onto the sheets with the feeling of frustration. Jacob shook his head lightly with a chuckle. Evie looked at him, wondering what was wrong. Jacob kissed her softly one last time before getting up.
"I'm sorry..." He whispered, walking back to his room, "I'm so sorry, dear sister." Jacob entered his room and lied down, lost in deep thought, closing his eyes, trying to clear his mind and sort out everything in his head.
Jacob didn't know what to do. He loved his sister, but a liking of Rose continued to grow. He felt ashamed for how things were turning out. The young man knew it was wrong to love his sister in that kind of way, but he just couldn't control his longing for her. And the young man also knew that it was wrong to go after another woman just to numb the pain. Jacob was stuck and torn between the two, leaving him with nothing, but misery. That night was one he wanted to forget, but also remember.