Principle of Nature
Chapter 5
Apples in the Desert

xXx

My Friend Gaara,
What. The. Hell. A BUNNY?! WHAT IS THAT?! WHAT. IS. THAT! Whaaaattt!? This isn't FAIR! It's not! You gave me a fucking DEAD RABBIT, you goddamn PSYCHOPATH. It's not even a kinda weird but really harmless stuffed rabbit! IT'S A FUCKING CORPSE.

There is something seriously wrong with you, man. Seriously.

Fucking give me something NICE, you goddamn bastard,
Naruto.

P.S: You are fucking sick.

A secretary paused outside the door to the Kazekage's office, scared stiff. Inside, she could hear the very soft, very sinister sound of half-crazed laughter. Turning around, she fled for her life.

No one would bother the man with anything less than a full-scale emergency for the next few days.

xXx

"Naruto, why do you have a dead rabbit on your door?" Sakura asked, frowning at her friend.

The blond blinked up at her, somehow managing to look slightly innocent. "It's a present from Gaara. He thought giving me a bunny corpse was funny. You know, I'm kinda seeing the hilarity now."

The kunoichi twitched. "Is this just to keep Izumo out?" she demanded flatly.

"That is a pleasant side effect, yeah," Naruto replied, smiling widely. "Did you need something?"

Frowning at him, she held out a packet of paper. "I understand Suna will be sending some nin to teach us techniques. You need to fill out that," she gestured to the packet, then pulled out a handful more from the satchel she carried, "And have them fill out these. One each. Then you need to copy them, and keep the copies in your records. You can send them to come to me at the hospital. Also, I got a letter from Shizune: they need more money. Tsunade lost it all."

The blond was sagging in his seat by the time she finished speaking. He wilted under her smile. "This is karma, isn't it?"

She shrugged. "Izumo may have said it was alright to make you suffer. Anyway, get that all finished, and when my fiance gets back from his mission, tell him he needs to track me down."

Naruto heaved a sigh, but memorized the instructions like a good little Kage. "Anything else, Mistress?"

Izumo, out in his office, smiled at the unpleasant sounds of a beating; aaah, life was good.

xXx

Sakura sighed as she stepped out of Surgery, giving the kunoichi with her a tired smile. "Disaster averted," she joked.

Mitsu snorted. "For now. Just wait till he gets into the beer again... oh, snap." She nodded ahead of them.

The pinkette followed her gaze, catching sight of her fiance, and sighed. "It's about time for me to take a break anyway. I'll see you in a bit, okay?"

The ginger woman nodded and left, leaving Sakura to her own fate. So the head mednin of the hospital hiked up her chin and walked right past him. Predictably, he followed. "He said you wanted me to find you."

"I know," she replied, and paused a beat before sighing. "Let's get to the break room. You can ward it."

"Okay."

And that was it between them until the door of the break room was shut and locked, with a mild jutsu sealing the room against eavesdroppers and spies. Only then did Itachi drop his expressionless mask and frown at her. "He also mentioned that the... ah, 'stalking' has to go. I refuse."

Emerald eyes narrowed. "Try again," she snapped, crossing her arms. "I will not put up with you haunting my steps, Itachi."

"I am merely concerned for your safety," he replied, just as stubborn.

She scoffed. "That's bullshit and you know it. You're freaking out because I'm pregnant and now the daddy paranoia has set in. And you know what? I am not going to be hurt. You prevented me from going on missions, you have basically had me put on village arrest, and you stalk me for kicks? Drop one of them, Itachi, or I swear to god I'll move in with my parents."

He glared back at her for a long moment, but of course it was Sakura, so she didn't back down. "And what about the child?"

"What about it? It's not part of the equation right now, Itachi," the kunoichi growled. "Right now, it is me and it is you and it is you getting into my personal space to the point that I am uncomfortable. I am neither a child nor defenseless and you are being completely unreasonable."

"I am not," he retorted, voice getting softer as it did when he was angry. "You're going to get hormonal and careless just because you're in the village. I can't allow you to come to harm."

Sakura snarled. "Hormonal?! Are you saying because I'm a pregnant lady it's okay?"

Itachi exhaled sharply, trying to dispel the mounting frustration. "That's not what I said, Sakura-"

"No, you didn't have to say it, dammit. I can read between the lines," she retorted, uncrossing her arms to clench her fists at her sides. "If you think it's okay just because I'm a woman, and hormonal, and pregnant, you have another fucking thing coming!"

"Sakura, you are not listening to me," he growled. "That isn't what I'm saying and it's not what I think. I think you are Haruno Sakura, fianced of Uchiha Itachi, and pregnant with an Uchiha. I think plenty other villages will want to snatch you away just because of that."

Her mouth pulled into a frown. "And you think I can't handle that?"

The Uchiha drew a breath, inwardly relieved that her voice had at least lowered. "I think you can. To a point. But not even you, as powerful as you are, can withstand everything. Being outnumbered, or poisoned, or jutsu like the kagemane... You are not infallible. I am not infallible. Together we are close enough."

Sakura fell silent for a long moment, abruptly realizing she'd been acting a bit ridiculous too. "Can you please stop the stalking?" she muttered, and when he frowned, she waved him silent. "I mean... just... walk with me. And no watching while I'm in surgery, or with a patient. You can be close, but don't crowd me, Itachi. Deal?"

He considered it only long enough to give her a once over. "Very well. Deal."

His beautiful, vicious kunoichi relaxed, feeling a bit tired suddenly. "Just as well. I fucking hate fighting with you."

A single brow slid upward. "I was of the opinion that you did not hate it so much."

She stuck her tongue out at him and stepped over, grinning when he tensed. "Relax. I'm not going to hit you." And she hugged him instead, pleased when he immediately wrapped his arms around her middle. "This is a better use of my time anyway."

"I concur." She swatted his arm and he smiled, resting his cheek on the crown of her head. "Is it too premature to ask for dinner? I'll cook."

She grinned against his collarbone. "Sounds wonderful. I'll con someone into giving me desert."

He chuckled. "My life is complete."

xXx

When Sakura returned home one night later that week, there was a familiar ink-like bird sitting on the swing on the porch. She took the scroll from it, smiling at the seal. Ino had finally written. Eagerly, she slipped into the house - it was empty - and made a pot of tea before sitting down to read.

Dear Sakura.
He smiled at me. Gaara. Smiled. At. Me. I almost died. Holy shit. He SMILES. … it was ridiculously pretty. Who has a pretty smile? Gaara. … I am so incredibly fucked. Except I'm NOT, which is the problem. OMG.

The rosette kunoichi had to pause for a grimace. T.M.I wasn't in Ino's vocabulary, apparently. "Ah well, can't have everything."

Also, Kankuro is a total pervert,-

"This is news?"

-and I'm pretty sure he has a shrine to you in his room.

Sakura blinked. And then blinked. "Say what?"

Locked door. Would NOT let me see inside. Absolutely refused. Why do I think it's you? He keeps asking how you're doing. Well, and Naruto, but I think they have some convoluted boy-love thing going on over there. I don't EVEN want to contemplate it. Ew.

A giggle escaped her throat before Sakura could stop it.

Anyway. So Sai is doing alright too. Of course. And he's still a pervert. Of course. And he has a fucking POSTER of Temari. Of- wait. A poster. No lie. Of Temari. He likes her boobs. How can I tell? She wasn't wearing a shirt in the poster. And I know all of this because I walked into his room to find him painting it. Sai saw Temari naked. I seriously hope she finds out, because I want to be there to watch her crush him. Seriously. That would make my week.

"Oh dear."

Kotetsu says hi, and also says to make sure Naruto isn't driving Izumo insane. Apparently they have some sort of turf war going on.

"That obvious?" Sakura snickered.

Kakashi has declined comment, but I think that's because he's all Super Nin. But you know he'd send his hellos if it was in his personality to do so. Can I recharacterize him? I think he'd be cute with bunny ears. Not that he isn't drop dead gorgeous anyway. Good god, no wonder Anko stalks him.

"Ewwwww."

Also, did I mention that Gaara smiled at me?

"Yes, Ino, and you know you did."

He smiled at me. I think I fell a bit in love right then. No lie. It was so preeeetttyyyyy. OMG. So you're probably wondering why. I'll tell you, and don't roll your eyes.

Sakura, who had indeed been about to do so, blinked. Ino knew her too well.

So I went up to the Kazekage dome with the list of approved techniques, because I was going to ask him if I was allowed to consult with Shizune-shisho about one of them. I'm not entirely familiar with it, you know? Never had to use it, though I have gone over the theory. Anyway, so I was let in, and we talked about that for a bit before I realized he had a kunai sitting right on his desk.

Not really an issue. I mean, he's a ninja. A leader of ninja. Normally, I wouldn't think twice about it. Except it had a bow around the handle, and was a thing of complete sharp-and-pointy beauty. Fucking ornamental shit. This thing is MEANT to sit on a shelf and look pretty. And it had 'Hokage Uzumaki' engraved in it.

Sakura's brows hiked up in surprise. "For Naruto?"

Yep. For Naruto.

"Ino, that's creepy. Stop it."

Sorry. Anyway. I asked him about it. He said it's Naruto's birthday present. I asked why an ornamental kunai. He told me it's a message between them. Wouldn't elaborate. But whatever. Let them have their boy secrets. I jokingly asked if he was going to tag it.

He SMILED. And then told me that no- he wouldn't want to waste the kunai. Aiieeee! He's so fucking hot! And kind of sweet. In that holy-shit-he-could-flatten-me kinda way. Actually, that's not such a bad idea...

I need to get laid.

Love, your best friend in the WORLD (or else!),
Ino

Sakura was smiling as she read over it again. Ino was so insanely bubbly. Not only that, she seemed happier. Not because of Gaara, or anyone else. It was the change of everything. The chance to just forget about her troubles for a while, with a team of people that were completely neutral to her standpoint in life.

It was nice to see her best friend enjoying things again.

xXx

"... and then, of course, he took the damn thing and dumped it over the cliff. Choji was all 'what did you do that for?'" Ino grinned slightly as she finished up the paperwork. "You know what he said?"

The secretary - the same man she'd flirted with that first day - smiled and accepted the packet. "No. What?"

She giggled. "'It was too troublesome not to'. I love Shikamaru to death, he's like my brother, but I swear, sometimes... Hee!"

He chuckled. "You ninja have some interesting stories," he teased.

The blonde waved him off. "Oh you should hear about the first time my best friend got really upset with her fiancé." Blue eyes flickered toward the clock, and she pouted. "Uuuunnfortunately, I don't have the time. I have a meeting with my teammates shortly. Did you need anything else for the files, Aoi-san?"

Glancing over the packet briefly, Aoi Yanzo shook his head. "Nope. Looks like I have everything. I'll see you later, Yamanaka-san."

She beamed, waved and left. Ten minutes later found her slipping into the lounge of her suite. Inside, Kotetsu and Sai were muttering amongst themselves while Kakashi apparently dozed on a futon to the side.

On the table in the corner, there was of course a tray of food, waiting for someone to eat it. Ino wasn't going to protest the invitation, and went over to pick up what looked like crackers with sesame seeds on them. There was a clove of still-steaming garlic, and a bowl of roasted black olives, and a plate with some sort of creamy stuff that looked a bit like cheese spread.

Experimentally, she spread some of the cheese over a cracker and nibbled on it, smiling. "That's kind of delicious," she said, delighted.

Kotetsu gave her an amused look. "Yes," he answered. "Are you ready to begin?"

She nodded, beaming. Sai cleared his throat.

"My efforts with Santi-san are going well. He's the man Baki-san introduced me to. He's been learning what I have to teach him. He's a good student. Patient and thorough. We have managed to establish a pattern of sorts, which is handy since I've never done anything like this before. He has plenty of scrolls on hand for notes, and I've been able to teach him how to special seal them, keyed only to his or my chakra.

"As for my relations with others, I of course have a cordial acquaintance with Baki-san, as a result of him being our escort for our stay. The Kazekage checks on our progress in person occasionally, but he usually sends Kankuro-san to do so in his stead. I suspect he keeps his own records on the matter, so should he ask a direct question concerning our purpose here, consider answering completely and truthfully."

The former Root-nin pulled out a scroll, fed his chakra into it and released the seal. "My other associations include passing acquaintance with the kunoichi Temari - whom, as you all know, left on a team for Konoha yesterday evening - and Kami-san. I am vaguely more familiar with Kankuro-san, though as always he keeps to himself and doesn't waste time conversing with me or Kotetsu-taicho outside of official business."

Ino blinked at that. "Really?" she blurted, drawing his gaze, and three sets of raised brows. "He talks to me all the time."

Kakashi nodded. "He has asked me after Sakura and Naruto," he added. "But nothing beyond that."

The kunoichi nodded quickly in agreement. "Me too. But sometimes we- eh, talk. He's incredibly nosy, actually..."

Kakashi and Kotetsu exchanged a look, before the latter cleared his throat. "In what way?" he asked, feigning idle curiosity.

"Hm?" She blinked at him, then frowned. She wasn't fooled, but since it was a request from her taicho, she answered anyway. "Harmless stuff, really. Flirtsy stuff. Favorite color, favorite novel, hobbies. It's just harmless flirting."

Her taicho seemed to accept her opinion on it, and nodded Sai on. The ANBU gave her a once-over (Is he concerned? That's new! she thought, surprised) before tapping the scroll. "As I was saying. I have noted a few people to avoid if possible, due to their disapproval of this exchange and their hostility toward myself and Kotetsu-taicho. The rest are at least neutral on the matter, or loyal to the Kazekage and his wishes."

Kakashi reached out and shifted the scroll around to get a better look at it. He tapped a name. "This one's been openly hostile? Can you describe him to us?"

"I can do better." Sai pulled out another scroll and some ink, hand flicking through a sketch.

The man he drew was kind of stocky, with a bandage wrapped around his head and bits of hair sticking out. There was a pronounced scar along one cheek, ending behind the bandage, which wrapped over what appeared to be a stub of an ear. He wore loose pants ending at his shins and a tight, sleeveless tunic type shirt that split at the hips into a back and front portion hanging to about mid-thigh. His sandals were standard ninja issue.

"I don't know much about him, other than he's known as Saru and appears to be some sort of Puppeteer. When I consulted Kankuro-san on the matter, he would only say that Saru is one of a few that do not like the thought of giving away their puppetry secrets," Sai reported.

Ino wrinkled her nose in distaste. "He's ugly," she decided uncharitably, and jerked away when Kakashi flicked her ear. "Oy!"

"Be polite," he chided, eye crinkling in his usual smile.

She just stuck her tongue out at him, and Kotetsu quickly intervened before they could get anymore childish. "Alright. I have nothing to contribute to his report, other than that I've spoken with the Kazekage a few times over minor snags - mostly Sai's inability to socialize properly," he gave the ANBU man a stern look, "But that's it. Ino, your report?"

She set aside her empty plate and took a moment to dust her hands off and organize her thoughts. "Was a bit rocky at first. Asana-san, the hospital director and head med-nin, is very suspicious of younger people. I had to prove myself several times over before she even bothered to start listening to what I was saying. After I helped during an emergency cesarean, though, she's warmed up a bit.

"I've managed to convince her to adjust her practice with sutures. It's a bit outdated, and my way is more efficient. I am so glad I'm the mednin and not Sai, because no offense, but you do not have enough social practice to deal with this lady." She rolled her eyes. "Nag nag nag, she nags all the time! Reminds me of a grumpier version of Tsunade-sama, if that's even possible." She waved a hand dismissively.

"Anyway. So as I said, I've talked with Kankuro-kun a bit, and Kazekage-sama a few times. He checks on us as well." She considered that, head cocking slightly. "He's actually a surprisingly pleasant conversationalist, once you get past the whole 'grr I'm the leader of the Hidden Sand' thing. And he's super sweet on Hokage-sama, which is just absolutely adorable."

Kotetsu coughed. "Ino-chan... As fascinating as that is, that's not the point of this meeting..."

"Oh! Right, sorry," she said, fighting the urge to blush. Oh crap! I went on a tangent about him! "Uhm, where was I? Right, right. Have also talked with Aoi-san at the reception desk a bit. He's very nice. The only issues I've had so far are with Kamane-san in the crisis ward. She is not receptive at all to my presence. Doesn't show the capability of physical violence thus far, and she's only a civilian as far as I know, but she's unpleasant to deal with.

"Also have dealt with Kami-san. He's a bit of an introvert, but he seems more curious about our presence than upset with it." She paused, considering. "I found out he's a puppeteer. Journeyman, I believe. I didn't even know they had ranks." She rolled her eyes.

"All things considered, it's been pretty smooth sailing. Mostly everyone is super nice, and they make sure I'm comfortable. The Kazekage has even seen that I'm allowed an office during my stay so I can keep things more organized. He's really a sweety." She grinned fondly.

She didn't notice Kakashi and Kotetsu exchange another look, or Sai give her an assessing glance. Kakashi straightened. "As for my report... Asana-san seems to have taken a bit of a shine to Ino-chan. She treats her with deference that she does not use with anyone else besides the Kazekage and perhaps his siblings. We are still being watched by the Suna ANBU, but they have not been overtly or covertly hostile, and they remain in the background for the most part. They only appeared once when Ino-san got lost, and told me where she was so I could find her."

Kotetsu gave the blonde a stern look, and she had the grace to blush. She'd forgotten to add that. No, she'd been hoping it wasn't relevant. "Is that all?"

"Yes, that's all of my report," Kakashi agreed calmly.

"Very well. Let's finish eating and resume our duties," Kotetsu said. "Sai-san I hope you can return to Baki-san alone for now? I need to send a written report to Hokage-sama."

Sai nodded. "Yes, I can do so." He rose. "In fact, I am going to return now." He picked up his supplies and put away the tools before handing the scrolls to Kotetsu for further perusal. "Please return the graph tonight, but feel free to add any observations of your own to it."

"Ah, may I see it when he's done, in that case?" Kakashi asked, and got a simple nod in response. "Very well. Thank you."

Ino hurried after Sai. "Hey! I'm gonna walk you back," she said. She wanted to ask him something. "I'll see you later, Kakashi-san!"

Kakashi waved her off. "I'll catch up in about an hour."

The two left, and Kotetsu sighed. "She seems to have transferred her attention from Kiba to the Kazekage," he muttered despondently.

Surprisingly, the Copy-Nin shook his head. "No. She's been interested in Gaara-sama for a long time. It's not new."

"She has?" Kotetsu's brows hiked up in surprise. He hadn't known that.

A nod was the answer. "I had noted it during Naruto-sama's chunin exam period, and Sakura-chan has mentioned it as well." He hummed thoughtfully, rubbing his thumb over a cloth-covered chin. Then he hooked his finger over the edge and tugged the mask down, reaching out for an imported apple. "At any rate, she seems to be keeping herself in check. However, Kankuro-san's inquiries as to her person are somewhat worrisome."

Kotetsu hummed noncommittally, grabbing a plate with some sort of flaky bread. "I'll make a note in my report to Hokage-sama. In the meantime, we'll just keep an eye on her and both Sand brothers."

"Noted." Kakashi bit into the apple, and blinked. "How is it this fresh?"

xXx

Another long A/N... sorry. ^^;

That last scene was twice as long as I thought it'd be... Lol. Anyway hope you enjoyed!

I would like to note- YAY, finally some ACTUAL Gaa-Ino tinges about! Sorry it's taken so long to get to it, but I'm still setting things up. ^^; Please be patient about that. Have a bit of faith, I DO know what I'm doing- mostly.

Anyway, with this, things on the GaaIno front should pick up. I will also be paying more attention to the HinaNaru side of things, and as always am semi-focused on ItaSak... But PLEASE, if you're here for JUST the pairings, don't hassle me about it. I don't like writing pointless romance. It makes me grimace. I WILL get to it, but I'm going to take my time and at least put reasoning in for it. I'm not convinced that relationships without stepping stones will last, so I'm going to give them stepping stones.

And crap, I'm rambling again. Arg. Well, next chapter, we'll finally get some GaaIno one-on-one (though it's very brief), but also prancing around is Kankuro! So you'll get some of him.

Reviews are appreciated! Please and thank you. ^^