So I've been a bit unwell and not sleeping much, so I've been too spaced out to right much these last few days, hence the longer than usual wait for a new chapter

Married Life

Chapter Twenty Three: Cold Light Of Dawn

Goblin Slayer woke with a hangover, a side effect of Minotaur Blacksmiths whiskey, but he was surprised to see that High Elf Archer was already up and out checking the farm for any signs of goblin activity. Even with his admittedly limited experience at reading people, he could tell that she wasn't coping well with the unexpected news of Godfrey's birth, but he didn't have a clue as to how best broach the subject with her. He wasn't even sure how to handle his own emotions on the matter, so he hoped that either Cow Girl or Guild Girl would take the lead at breaking the Ranger out of her funk.

Dressing in his customary armour, he ventured out, deciding that the least he could do was help her.

Mush to his surprise, he found her in a small meadow that was separated from the rest of the farm by a small group of trees, sitting on the grass, her bow laying forgotten to one side. He could tell that she'd been crying, but had no idea how to comfort her, or if he should even try. For want of anything better to do, he knelt down beside her as gently as he could then froze when suddenly collapsed onto his lap. He looked down at her for a moment then a memory Flashed before his eyes, and he tentatively stroked her hair as Cow Girl had once his.

"I screwed up, Orcbolg." the Elf's voice was soft, and he could tell that she'd been crying.

"You did nothing wrong." he did his best to sound reassuring.

"If I hadn't asked Sword Maiden to perform the Ritual..."

"Then we wouldn't have Fawn."

"But I..."

"We: I agreed to the Ritual."

"How do you do it?" High Elf Archer asked rolling over so she could look up at him, "How are you so fearless all the time?"

There was a moment of silence, Goblin Slayers hand hanging suspended in mid-air.

"...I'm afraid all of the time." he admitted, his voice a thin rasp, "Afraid that I'm not a good enough husband, that I won't be a good enough father. Afraid that I'll die in some random goblin cave somewhere and leave you all alone."

"But...you never show it."

"That's because I have the three of you there beside me." his hand came down to cup the side of her face, "You are my rock, my strength."

"I'm not sure how much help I'm going to be once word gets out. People already look at as with scorne and disgust because of our marriage. When they learn that I, for want of a better word, fathered a child with another woman...people may ask if Grace, Jacob and Eugene are even yours."

"They're obviously human, and people will find other things to talk about in time."

"Gam zeh ya'avor."

"I do not understand."

"It's a very old saying, the origin of which is lost even to my people, but it translates into the common tough as 'this too shall pass'."

"Wise words."

"When did our lives get so complicated?"

"The day you, Cow Girl and Guild Girl cornered me and told me that the four of us were getting married."

"True."

The pair lapsed into silence for a while, simply enjoying the relative silence of the spring morning.

Cow Girl made her way back to the cottage, having helped milk the cows then lead them out to the pasture. Her uncle and the two new farmhands, still going by Staff Fighter and Female Rogue, were perfectly capable of doing it without her, but she enjoyed the work: it gave her a sense of accomplishment that simply staying at home and looking after the children full time wouldn't have.

A delivery was due in town, but it was Guild Girls day off, so she had agreed to watch the children and carry out her share of the chores in the morning, then head into town to do some shopping after Cow Girl returned around lunchtime. They had agreed, somewhat reluctantly, that High Elf Archer had recovered enough from having Fawn that she could look for a low-level Quest to get herself back in the game. And the truth was with four children and the work being done on the house, they needed the extra income. They weren't in danger of going into debt, but the budget was far tighter than they would have liked.

Goblin Slayer had broached the idea of Pledging himself to one of the nobles responsible for administering the Frontier: he would have ensured them a regular income, but it would have tied him to the whims of a man he had never met, required to serve whenever called upon in whatever capacity the Lord demanded. That could be anything from acting as the local sherrif, to enforcing taxes and even joining the local militia should they be needed. Few Adventurers were willing to take such a burden upon themselves under anything but the direst of circumstances, as too many had been turned into little more than hired thugs of a distant authority. His wives had quickly forbidden him from even considering it: too much work had been put into rehabilitating him in the eyes of the local people and his fellow Adventurers to just throw it all away like that. Money might have been tight, but it wasn't that tight.

Still, it was good to have something she could control to concentrate on.

Things had been tence the night before. While not every night ended up with some depraved orgy, despite what a lot of people in town liked to think, the four of them were usual at least affectionate, even if it was just a few kisses and gentle caressing as they got ready for bed. And they'd talk; things that had happened during the day, their plans for the next, whatever little things cropped into their minds. But the night before had been silent, the four of them hardly even acknowledging the others as they changed quickly before climbing into bed. Goblin Slayers place was centre left, leaving the rest of the bed for his wives, and usually two would sleep on his right, one on his left, taking it in turns to rotate between the three.

But that night had been anything but usual.

Despite what had been said earlier in the day, things were still far from back to normal between them. It was less the things that were said, but rather those left unsaid. And while it was true that she and Guild Girl still loved High Elf Archer, the strain that had been put on their relationship after her confession over what had happened in Water Town had still not fully healed. Having Sword Maiden show up unannounced with a second child born of that night... Old wounds had been ripped open once again. And while they hadn't lied to the Elf when they told her that they did not blame her for what had happened, there were still some very strong and confusing emotions that they needed to deal with, a process that would take time.

In the end, High Elf Archer had taken the space on the far left, leaving room for Goblin Slayer once he returned from his patrol of the farm. Much to the surprise of both of her wives, Guild Girl took Goblin Slayers spot, wrapping her arms around the Ranger, inviting Cow Girl to spoon her from behind. She did as she was instructed, reaching across the brunette to take the Elf's hand with her own, holding the three of them together.

But despite their physical closeness, they were still distant.

Cow Girl had drifted off into a fitful sleep, waking at some point to discover that High Elf Archer had left, but Goblin Slayer had taken the empty spot behind her. Guild Girl had turned over so that the two of them were face to face, embracing like lovers in their sleep. She contemplated trying to get up without waking her two bedfellows, but she couldn't see a way to detangle herself without causing too much movement, especially given how light a sleeper Goblin Slayer was. Instead she tried to calm herself by remembering that High Elf Archer had no doubt gone to check on the children, something they were all prone to do if they woke in the night. Feeding all four alone was physically impossible, so if they were all hungry, it was a question of which of the other wives was the easiest to wake to help.

Witch had bought them a contraption that would not have looked out of place in a torture chamber that was supposed to help, and all three of them had sworn to get their revenge when she had her first-born.

She had been at the point of falling back asleep when High Elf Archer had all but bolted into the room, slamming the door shut so loud Cow Girl was surprised that it didn't wake Goblin Slayer. The Ranger was dressed in the robe she used on the rare occasion they had house guests, but her usually happy-go-lucky expression had been replaced by one of confusion and concern. Cow Girl raised her head, and inquisitive look on her face, but the Adventurer almost jumped into bed, grabbing Guild Girl like a drowning man thrown a roap. The redhead reached out to her wife, and was surprised to discover that she was shivering, even though the cottage was reasonably warm. The Elf buried her face in the brunettes hair, almost as if she was trying to hide from something.

A momentary pang of fear stabbed Cow Girl through the heart, concerned that something had happened to one of the children, but then she heard footsteps in the hallway that stopped momentarily outside their room before continuing on to the guest room next door. They were far too soft to be Lord Paladín or Mage, and that left only Sword Maiden. The sound of the footsteps seemed to strike High Elf Archer with an almost physical force, and Cow Girl couldn't help but wonder just what had been said to affect her so.

But it was the middle of the night, and some things were best left for the morning, so she simply held her wives and sort the solace of sleep.

Waking with the rising sun, she discovered that High Elf Archer had already left to inspect the property for signs of goblin activity during the night, while their husband was adjusting the straps on his armour. Leaving Guild Girl to sleep a little longer, Cow Girl had checked on the children before washing herself and dressing. She wanted to ask High Elf Archer about the night before, but something told her that it was a conversation best kept until they had a moment alone. While there were no secrets between the four of them, sometimes it was best to talk things out individually.

Something had happened, something beyond the shocking revelation that High Elf Archer and Sword Maiden had a child, and Cow Girl intended to get to the bottom of it before it tore their family apart.

To Be Continued...