A/N;; I can't believe it's already December, so not ready for next year, haha. This update will hopefully be followed up before Christmas. I still lovvve you guyssss. ^^
Two nights ago, or maybe three, maybe four..? It was definitely some nights ago. They didn't talk much. Messes of torn paper lay scattered around them, all to show for one single, neat, clean-cut copy. Pages long. From the desk, tedious and carefully chosen words simmer, mocking her quietly. She already knew she wouldn't listen to half of such an overly-rehearsed snooze fest. Sometimes, she hated listening.
At about early morning, she couldn't be exactly sure why she was there. They had been drinking.. oh, right. It used to be fun. Supposed to be fun. It was the only reason for her desperate love of the hobby. But no. Kakashi was the most professional buzzkill.
Anko saw firsthand just how restless and uneasy he happened to be. He fought sleep like some sort of plague, tossing and turning all night, interrupting any hope of rest on both ends. Nervousness was not a common emotion she got the pleasure of witnessing in Kakashi Hatake. When unfortunately, it turned out to be a particularly uncomfortable experience.
She weakly reached for a long-necked bottle on the nightstand, not bothering to react as it made contact with the ground. She felt like doing the same. Gone. Her motor skills were shot and she was so fucking tired. She should've been relishing in nonproductive moments of silence, but instead found herself silently resenting the man beside her with every breath. She was still conscious because of this insomnia-ridden man. He finally became still, long after her patience wore down.
"Are you okay?"
He asked, watching as her fingers twitched, head throbbing sensationally. She laid flat on her stomach, face buried in pillows. He didn't feel too great in all honesty. Early morning wasn't as much of a concern as what day it was. Every fucking hour, every few hours, every godforsaken sixty minutes.. He would count. Time was not going to slow down for him, no matter how badly he wanted it to. But he was great at wasting it. There were an unfathomable number of things he should've been doing besides dreading upcoming weeks of constant stress. Alcohol didn't seem to be on his side, either.
She out-drank him without shame, a tolerance that only rose with practice. She said absolutely nothing for a long while. Even when he was sure she'd lash out at him for being so fidgety. They were different shades of hungover.
"I'm fine..." She peeked out from the corner of her elbow. More bottles than she remembered drinking trashed the floor. Oh, well. "I do wish you'd choose a position and quit moving, though."
"You never said anything, so I figured you didn't mind," He stretched, eyeing his book collection across the room. The small window he had for catching up on readings was closing quickly. He was still working on saying goodbye to any improvised leisure.
"I shouldn't have to," Anko found her voice muffled, lazily pawing at him. Her fingers caught his mask, blindly attempting to guide him down.
Kakashi leaned further to the side, resisting before sedately prying her hold off him. Sudden assertions weren't what he needed right then.
"I'm trying to sleep," He complained after a few more vain tries, readjusting his mask and doing his best to repress all the responsibilities he was avoiding.
Now he was tired? Welcome to my conscious little world, she thought spitefully.
Anko lifted her head after that, squinting at his rugged appearance in offense. She understood wholeheartedly where bad moods came from, but she accepted no blame. Bags started to line bloodshot eyes, hair poking in strange directions, life heading in an unpredictable spiral, and... somehow.. he still looked hot.
"I was just trying to get a kiss, but you know what, fuck you," She hastily turned away from him, stealing half the blankets in the process. "whatever, I see how it is."
"Okay, okay, my bad," Kakashi sighed in defeat, draping one arm over her in a futile gesture to show how wrong he was.
Although she knew he meant no harm and that he sounded genuine, she was still kind of pissed. He brought these troubles on himself. "Go away, I'm tired."
"Hey, I really am tired," He felt like he hadn't slept in days, and everything seemed to weigh on him all at once. Kakashi slid his hand up her back, trying to ignore the strong scent of liquor in her hair.
"You're so annoying," Anko let him get closer after she pulled away successfully twice, even though she never got her kiss.
"Ouch, that hurts," He acted like he hadn't heard that quote before. Actually heard it now and again from the snake handler.
"It should."
Kakashi felt his hand heat up against the warmth of her skin, and he got lost in space for a millisecond. "Are you sure that you're still going to like me after this?"
She hesitated, the air catching between them. Stupid questions. She turned her head so he couldn't see her expression. It was asked with a hint of sarcasm and wonder, maybe something that could be taken for skepticism. He meant it as a joke. But she took everything too seriously nowadays. The answer was yes, and he had to understand that part scared her most. Would he still like her? If nothing changed between them physically, she couldn't ask for a lot more; the complexity of his thoughts were something she'd never grasp. He wasn't quite the emotional rock any woman hoped for, but she wasn't the emotional rock any man dreamed of.
"Well, damn, I guess."
"That didn't sound too convincing," He did his worst impression of a sorrowed tone, cautiously reclaiming blankets so there was less of a barrier between them.
"Because we've gone over this," Anko scolded in case he stopped listening, "I'm gonna kidnap the fuck out of you whenever I feel like it because I like you so much."
"I don't know," Kakashi seemed unconvinced of her intentions, "I think you need to remind me."
"What are you, a woman?" She rested against him, drawing both arms around his shoulders. "You know I don't like that many people, so I have to keep you around."
"I'll be sure not to ask you any more questions," He settled, "but that kidnapping part sounds kind of fun."
Present day. She stood in a gray clearing of some sort, but she hadn't remembered walking there. What time is it? She can't shake the feeling that she should be somewhere.
It was only then Anko noticed the mass amount of white graves surrounding her. Some marked, some unmarked. Dead people. She was familiar with many of the graves there. Friends, strangers, civilians of Konoha.. She wasn't crazy about cemeteries.
A harsh breeze took her off guard, and everything became eerily silent all of a sudden.
"My parents are buried here, but I suppose you knew that."
She almost landed headfirst sideways from spinning around so fast. How was it possible that she didn't sense him, even a little bit? How come she had no control over anything that happened lately?
"What do you want?"
Anko sent him a wide-eyed stare filled with hateful fury. She couldn't believe this was to be her first face-to-face with Orochimaru postwar. She wasn't mentally prepared, and her heart rate was just starting to return to normal.
"I was very young when I lost them," He ignored his former student well, "you must be able to sympathize with such a past tragedy."
"Did you fucking hear me?" She yelled, taking a brave step forward. "Answer!"
"The one you're standing closest to, yes, that's the one," Orochimaru kept his hands in the pockets of his long robe.
She glanced down for a split second, offering no compassion whatsoever. "Just what are you getting at?"
He shrugged, seeming to gaze right through her, "I've always watched you."
Anko froze in place, the surrealism of the moment finally hitting. The realization that it didn't feel like a nightmare. She swore that she would take him down, put a stop to his evil doings, make sure he never hurt anyone like he hurt her. She failed herself, and she couldn't let that go."You've watched me?" Yeah, I bet that creepy bastard's watched me.
"Of course," Orochimaru held his hands together in a peaceful, non-confrontational gesture. "Why wouldn't I look after my best student?"
"That's bullshit," She glared until her eyes stung themselves, "you're nothing but a user."
"I did train Sasuke, but he was only meant to be my vessel," He closed golden orbs, "you were still my best student. Far more obedient, too."
"Shut up!" Anko cut him off before he could continue. She could feel a lump swelling in the back of her throat already. She didn't know why she always got so irrationally emotional when confronting him. Unfiltered rage boiled through every inch of her, and it was a never-ending burden. "I don't want to hear your lies, or whatever the hell you think justifies your actions."
"You smell of hard liquor."
It was almost as if they were in totally separate worlds. She wouldn't calm down. "Do me a favor and drop dead! I don't want to see you ever again!"
"Oh, but you're such a bitter girl, Anko," Orochimaru didn't move, didn't even seem fazed. "when are you going to forgive yourself?"
Her body reacted on its own accord then, thrusting a kunai at his neck. She never gave it a second thought. He knew how to trigger somebody with no self-restraint.
And he was gone.