Chapter Three
Connor had never timed himself scrubbing up for an op but he had a bet that this time had been his fasted. All the time he had taken to get ready, he had watched as the surgical team prepped Will for his first of many operations. This operation had been set as mainly damage control, his friend needed to stop bleeding out and that was his main goal. He needed to stop the bleeding.
As he entered the room, he felt the room change. Everyone in the room had worked with Will. And some had become friends with him.
Rhodes couldn't help but look at his friend's face every few minutes as he waited for everything to get set in place. His instruments were brought next to him and another rack of blood bags had been set to push as much blood into Will. Machines that told him that his friend was still with them littered near Will's head.
The Anaesthetics Registrar and his team had the worst job, Will's blood pressure and heart rate kept dropping and when they had thought they had stopped him from getting any worse, he did. When he was ready, the main registrar had turned to him and told him outright that he couldn't promise things would go smoothly. But he would try is best.
Connor and to be truthful everyone in the room knew that this operation was going to be the hardest they had ever done. When he got the green light from everyone in the room he got to work unpacking the wound. Only to be greeted to seeing that the packs were now drowning in his friend's blood.
"Suction now." Connor asked unable to see anything. His second quickly started his best to remove the blood to give him a clear field however the blood was only replaced by more blood.
At that moment he heard the door open; he quickly looked up only to see Sam who was already scrubbed him ready for the operation.
"What have we got?" She asked as she got to the other side of the trolley holding her hands up, looking at the wound in front of her which still had a couple of packs around it. As she had walked in, Connor caught her looking at Will's face. He knew that she was checking to see if what she had heard was right. Gossip in the hospital always got its way around like wildfire.
"Single stab wound to the center of the abdomen, scan shows that it has gone right through the diaphragm causing it to collapse. It has caused major bleeding into the chest and abdomen. He had a large hemothorax in his left lung which a chest tube is in place for. We need to clear the blood away from the wound if we have any chance of closing the wound and stopping the bleeding. The scan wasn't clear if the knife got to the heart or not."
At the end of Connor's report, he knew that the one detail he had left out but had made clear that the knife had gone in a upper motion and his fear that the knife tip or more of the blade had gotten to Will's heart.
Sam nodded at the plan; she knew that everyone was going to feel the pressure of helping with this operation. Everyone in the hospital would be waiting for an update on Will's condition but also the hospital bosses when they found out. She looked around the room and said.
"Ok everybody, I know this case is personal but we need to work like normal. He is a patient and that means we give everything we got to keeping him alive." She had also noted that the leads of each department had taken the jobs that they would have given to more junior members of their teams. Only the best for one of their own.
They were going to have a fight on their hands to save the life of someone they worked with and a friend. Sam stepped up to the table and nodded. He reply with a nod and they got to work.
...
When Jay had first been taken to the waiting room by Maggie; he had first chosen to pace the waiting room waiting for news. After ten minutes he had final collapsed into one of the chairs that lined the room. He had been on his way back to the district when he had gotten the call.
He had been surprised that Will had put him down as his emergency contact, they had only just started to mend their broken relationship and yet his brother needed him.
What was worse was the worry that he hadn't been told any details about what had happened to his older brother. All Maggie told him was that he needed to get to the hospital now. And the worry had only grown when he had pulled up to see a sea of police cars already outside.
But when he saw the blood that still remained on the floor just in front of the desk, he knew that it wasn't good. Fear, shock and anger entered his system all at once when Ms Goodwin had told him what had happened. His older brother had been stabbed right outside the hospital and now was fighting for his life.
That anger made him call Voight as soon as his feet had touched the waiting room floor. He wanted whoever had done this to his family to pay. But now that anger had almost gone, and the pain and worry had taken over him. He sat there in a chair to which he had sat before waiting for news of a fallen police officer before. But this time it was his own blood.
He found himself rocking his feet on the chair legs as he waited. He hated the wait. All Jay could think about was watching his brother covered in blood being wheeled away from him. He had been deadly pale. He had seen that before with people who hadn't survived their wounds and that scared him. His only hope that he had left was the knowledge that his brother was one to fight, he would fight to live.
On the phone to Voight, his Sergeant had told him that they would drop every case they were currently working on to catch the guy. He also promised that they would get to the hospital as soon as they could. Jay had already seen a forensic team arrive the same time as him.
However the one thing that Voight made sure was drilled into the wound man's head was that he was not to try to find where his brother was attacked or start working on who had tried to kill his brother. Jay had started to argue with Voight, saying that this case was personal. Someone had gone after his brother. But Voight had made it clear that he wasn't allowed anywhere near the case.
As Jay waited for news, his mind had already started to play tricks with him. Images of what the attack might have looked like haunted him. Had there been one attacker or had a gang targeted him, seeing who could kill him first. But the main thing that had crossed his mind was the idea of his brother been targeted because of him. Had he sent his brother to hell because of something he had done?
Both of them had taken self-defence when they had been younger and he knew very well that Will could defend himself when he needed too. But unlike him Will had no military experience. He had been involved in fights but never ones that meant he was fighting for his life. Maybe if he had taught him how to defend himself this wouldn't have happened.
Will's job shouldn't come with these risks. Jay knew that but at the same time he had seen the darkness in the world for too long and knew that everyone was a victim. And sadly, this time it had been his brother who had taken the hit.
The sound of a door opening brought him out of his thought; he looked up to see Natalie walk in. Everyone knew that his brother and her liked each thought back to when Will had started talking about her to him. It was normally little comments about her but he could tell that his brother really liked her. The whole hospital knew that the pair liked each other. Everyone expect them.
As he looked at her more closely he noticed that her eyes were red and swollen as if she had been crying. She quickly rubbed her eyes once more before coming to sit next to him.
"Have you heard anything?" She asked barely whispering, her voice also told him that she had been crying for a while and her voice had become harsh.
"Nothing yet." Jay said shaking his head, he had wanted to tell her that his brother was a pain and love to keep people waiting but he didn't have the heart. His brother was fighting, fighting to stay alive.
"He is a fighter, always has been." Jay muttered looking back at his hands. Growing up in their house, they needed to be. However this time Will had more to fight for. Their father had never been a fan of Will becoming a doctor, being ex-military himself he had planned for both of his sons joining up like he did but that wasn't Will.
Will had never been one to pick a fight, hell he was the smartest kid in their school. Jay would have never passed as many of his classes if it hadn't been for his older brother. But unlike him Will knew what he wanted to do and that was to help people. To train as a doctor and it had also been the reason why he had left for New York.
Their mother had wanted what was best for her sons and had been proud of Will to get into medical school. And she had tried to help him the best she can however she wouldn't help pay his way through it. He had to do that himself. Their father seem to never approve and told him clearly that he wasn't spending his money on something that was just a waste of time.
Jay hated the man for that, Will had made something of his life and he could never understand how Will could just forgive the man like he did? Jay had refused to visit or even speak to his father after Will left. And only when he had too, a few times he had to bail him out of jail for doing something stupid. Those moments he hadn't told Will, nor did he plan too. But his brother was forgiving, he had always been that since a kid. And personally he knew that Will had forgiven him for a lot of things over the years. Some things Jay had regretted the moment he had done them.
Natalie nodded; she new that Will could fight. She had seen it. She had seen it when he was dealing with his patients as it wasn't just a fight for them. He fought alongside them. And he took their losses as his own.
She hated herself so much at the moment. She had started to fall for the headstrong Chicago boy the moment she had meet him. There was something about him; his smile and laugh always made her smile. However she had first thought that her feelings were wrong, like she was cheating on her dead husband. Which was why she never told him what she felt. She kept it buried.
When the feelings had become so strong that she couldn't ignore them anymore, she left horrible. She had just lost Jeff, and was about to have his son. She couldn't love him when was still deeply in love with Jeff and grieving him at the same time.
However when Owen had been born and she had expected that she needed to move on, she couldn't think of a better man than Will. He had been so kind to her with everything. He was brilliant around her son and had been there to help her from the moment he was born.
She had found that with Will, she didn't need to pretend anything. There was a connection that became even more stronger when they were together, and when they were apart all she could think about was where he was. That connection because even more stronger when she had been in labour. All she could think about was that she needed Will. She wanted Will but he never came. After Owen had made himself known and was fast asleep, all she only guessed that he might have thought that he wasn't welcome.
But even after the birth she couldn't make herself tell him how she felt. It never seemed to be the right timing, but now she was worried that maybe she would never get a chance to tell him how much he meant to her. To her and Owen.
"How's Owen?" Jay asked looking at her, the silence was killing him. And since he had never meet the little man that Will had never stopped talking about. Natalie at first was shocked at the question; for one she didn't think Will's younger brother would even know her son's name but she could only guessed that like before Will had talked about her to his brother.
"He is good." She started, glad to be talking about something good. "He is sleeping through finally but that is thanks to Will." She said without thinking; it was like having a normal conversation about her son to a friend, but she knew that it had been Will who had saved her from some very stressful and restless nights.
For a few months, Owen hadn't been sleeping very well. And working in the ED and having little sleep had nearly wiped her out. One night by chance, she had forgotten her coat and had planned to call Helen to see if she wouldn't mind watching Owen when she went and got it. She had booked the week off and had planned many day trips for Owen. But as she went to pick up the phone, there was a knock on the door.
And there he was, he had noticed it when he had been leaving and knew that she would need it. However he then understood why she had been in what he classed as a bad mood. Owen was not at all going to sleep. Quickly he had offered her his help; she didn't want to stop him from enjoying his night. She had heard him planning to meet his brother at Molly's. However he told her that his brother could wait.
She had watched him take a screaming Owen into his arms from his cot and started to rock him gentle. And then quickly ordered her to go and grab something to eat and to grab a shower. She smiled and thanked him promising that she would be as quick as she could. And that she was, she quickly made a sandwich and ate it as she turned the shower on and got her towel from the radiator.
She quickly checked on Will and found Owen smiling at the doctor like it was christmas day. She smiled at the image, Owen loved Will and that had been clear from the first time the pair had seen each other. But as the warm water hit her face, she remembered that Will wasn't Owen's father and that her son would grow up not knowing his real father. Jeff would have been much like Will. He would have loved playing with his son. She felt a tear fall from her face. She never wanted to feel like she was replacing Jeff, but at the same time she knew that Jeff had told her one night before he was deployed that he wanted her to move on if anything happened to him.
Twenty minutes later she had walked into the sitting to find it empty. Fear filled her heart in that moment but it disappeared when she heard Will's voice in Owen's nursery. Will was stood in front of Owen's cot with the little man fast asleep in Will's arms.
Natalie couldn't work out what Will was saying but knew that he was singing a lullaby to her son. She had no idea that he could sing but as he sang softly to her son she found herself smiling. Later she worked out that he had been singing in Latin. Will had never known that she had seen this as she had quickly went back into the kitchen as soon as he had placed the sleeping baby in the cot.
Snapping back to the present, she wished she had said something to Will.
"Yer, Will has always been good with kids." Jay said with a smile, thinking back to his brother. Even as kids, Will had always been good with younger kids. When they played in the street, it was Will that had got the other kids involved. Will would be a great father if he ever settled down. However his brother had partied for most of his life but deep down he knew that like him, Will was waiting for the right girl. Personally, Jay knew that he had already but the idiot couldn't see what was right in front of him.
The pair fell silent for a while, both thinking about Will. And silently praying that he was holding his own. What was worse for Natalie was that she, like Jay, could only guess the injuries that he had suffered. She had just entered the ER when she had seen the state of trauma one and then to learn from Maggie and April that the blood that was painted over the floor was Will's blood.
The silence was only broken by the door opening, however it wasn't the floor that lead to the operating rooms. Instead they saw Erin, Antonio and Voight coming towards them, Erin quickly grabbed Jay's hand and sat next to her partner. She could feel that her partner was close to losing all control of his emotions. And she had learned that when family was involved the anger was the worst.
"Any news if Will?" Voight asked sitting in the seat opposite to Jay, he could tell that his young detective was angry, and that the anger was very close to the surface along with all the other emotions that were stirring in the young man.
Voight had only meet the young doctor a few times but he liked him. He had dropped everything and had helped him save the life of someone he cared about without even a second thought. But what impressed him the most was that by law the doctors were meant to report any bullet wounds. And as Will had told him when Jay was taking him home was that in his eyes he had reported to the law. However knew that there was going to be no paperwork for it and that along risked his own job but also his license.
Jay shook his head, and looked directly at his Sergeant. "Do you know who did this?" As he said those words he saw something in his Sergeant's eyes. He knew something. Jay glared at his Sergeant who now couldn't meet his eyes. Jay then turned his head to Antonio who did meet his eyes but the look he could see wasn't good.
"Uniform found where Will was attacked, it was a little courtyard at the side of the hospital…" Antonio started watching both his friend and Voight, he knew that if they told Jay too much, he would want to be involved and speaking from experience getting involved in a case that was too personal never ended well.
"We had Mouse pull up all the CCTV footage from the area to see if we could track Will. And from that we have a clear picture on who attacked him." Antonio added now looking directly at Jay who had let go of Erin's hand and was now gripped the edge of his seat. Natalie didn't say a word. She couldn't.
"Who?" Jay asked barely able to control his anger as it came wrapped around his voice when he asked.
Antonio looked at Voight who nodded. He knew that it wouldn't keep secret for long and more so when they had asked Ms Goodwin to ID the man she had removed from the hospital. And that they had more likely been overheard.
"The attacker was possibly a man named Jason Andrew Walker." Antonio started letting the words sink in. Natalie couldn't help but gasp, she knew the name and knew now why Will had been attacked. However it only made her feel like Will could never catch a brake.
"A couple of hours ago he brought in his wife, Sarah with their son Alex. She had been complaining of having dizzy spells. Will was the doctor signed to the case; after speaking to the other doctors on shift, he was running tests when her heart gave in." Jay closed his eyes for a minute as Antonio stopped. He knew that his brother would blame himself for the woman's death. He always took loss personal.
"Autopsy found that she had an unidentified heart condition. And that she was a ticking time bomb. One minute she was fine and the next she was dead." Jay opened his eyes and looked at Antonio, he knew what was coming and he felt the anger grow again inside him.
"From what we got from the nurses and the other doctors, after Will called time of death, Mr Walker blamed Will for his wife's death. Saying that he didn't do enough to save her in time. Ms Goodwin and security made him leave after making threats. We have police looking for him now." As Antonio finished Jay crushed his hands into fists.
Everyone sat in silence for a minute. Natalie's face was cut from her tears running down her face. She had been the one to stop Will from trying to bring Sarah Walker back. She was gone and they all knew it but Will didn't want to stop. He wanted to save her for her little boy who had sadly seen the whole thing. At the age of eleven, he had seen his mother die.
"Are you tell me…" Jay started as he felt the anger grow now to dangerous levels. "... that my brother was attacked because he couldn't save someone?" Jay said in a threatening tone.
Erin placed her hand on his leg to try her best to calm him, however as she did Jay shot his leg away from her. It was like he had been touched by a red hot knife as the anger had now started to rage in his body.
Voight knew the signs that Jay was losing control of his emotions and knew that he needed to get his detective's mind off hunting the person who had tried to kill his brother. He knew that anger and knew that it would in the end cause more pain than good.
"Jay, we will get this guy. And he will pay for that he has done." Voight started to stay, catching Jay's eye. And then added the words that he knew would keep Jay far away from the search.
"What I need you to do is stay here with your brother…" At his words, Jay opened his mouth to argue that he wanted to caught Walker himself. But before Jay could interrupt him Voight added.
"...I have a feeling that Walker when he finds out your brother is alive will come back and finish the job." Voight said sending a warning look at his detective.
Jay nodded but didn't unclench his hands. The anger was still there, but at least he now could put that anger to use. And Voight was right, even if he couldn't help find the bastard that had attacked his brother he knew that now he had a task he could focus on. Will was still in danger and when he did wake up he needed protection. Walker wouldn't get anywhere near his brother again and if he did, he wouldn't be responsible for his actions.
Voight knew that his message had got through Jay. Standing quickly he turned to Erin who was now looking at him hoping that he wouldn't make her leave Jay alone.
"Erin you stay here with Jay, and work with uniform to get Will secure. The rest of us will find Walker. You have my word." Voight said patting Jay's shoulder before leaving with Antonio close behind him.
Jay was in his own world now. At first it was about what he would do if he got his hands on Walker. But then it fell back to how he was going to get Will to expect that the woman's death wasn't his fault.
He didn't even hear Erin get up and tell him that she was going to speak to security and get the uniform officers that were going to be assigned to Will's protection team. He knew that his brother would be blaming himself for not doing enough to save the woman in his care. But he hoped that his brother was fighting to come back to him. Even when he felt that he had failed.
But now he knew that he would do everything in his power to make sure that no one could hurt his brother again. He had lost his brother once and he wasn't going to let it happen again. Not on his watch.
After five minutes, the door opened again but it wasn't the door that would give them news. Instead Ethan and Dr Charles walk into the waiting room, Natalie softly smiled at Ethan who held her shoulder before taking Voight's seat looking at Natalie to Jay.
"Any news?" Ethan asked looking at Jay, hoping that there would be news by now. Dr Charles just stood by the door watching the two doctors and the young and very clearly an angry detective.
"No. Nothing yet." Natalie said seeing that Jay couldn't talk or was afraid that he would start shouting. Instead he just looked at the floor to the door, not making eye contact with anyone. He was now tired of waiting. All he could do was pray that someone would come and tell him if his brother had survived.
"I should have gone after him…" Ethan said looking at his hands who were shaking a little but not too much that it wasn't noticeable.
Jay looked up at the doctor in front of him. Natalie wanted to say something but the words wouldn't come.
"...I could have stopped this." Ethan muttered quietly but in the quiet waiting room., they all heard it. Dr Charles moved towards Ethan ready to correct the doctor but seeing what he was doing Ethan spoke up.
"No… I knew that he was upset. That case hit him hard and then for the husband to go and threaten Will…" At Ethan's words, Jay looked up confused at the doctor's words. The one thing that he could guess was that Ethan had taken it upon himself to look out for his brother and now felt like he had failed him. Just like he had.
"Or you could also be killed or hurt too. Nothing would have stopped this. He would have gone after Will here or later on…" Jay had interrupted Ethan's rant. But then he stopped as images infected his mind of Will bleeding out in some alley or on his apartment floor.
"He is just lucky that he was able to get help." Jay then added giving Ethan a stern look. His brother would have never forgive himself if someone else had gotten hurt because of him. And his brother had enough guilt on him at the moment anymore could possibly make him see that there was no point in fighting.
Jay also knew that Will had a good friend in front of him and would kill him for making his friend hate himself and blame himself for actions that they had no control over. However that didn't mean that he couldn't blame himself for not being there for his brother like he should have been.
Dr Charles smiled softly at the young detective and could see that his words had affected Ethan very well. They were soon joined by April who quickly sat next to Natalie without a word. Nat knew that it was time for her break and didn't blame her for wanting to be with them waiting for news.
Silence filled the room again until they heard the sound of the door opening again and Erin and Maggie joined them but instead of sitting down Erin called Jay's name. Looking up he saw the doors to the operating room open. Connor looking tired and stress was marked deep in his face.
They all quickly got to his feet and at the same time and moved towards Connor.
"How is he?" Jay asked as soon as Connor meet them hoping and praying that his brother had fought for him but more importantly for himself.
Rhodes sighed and looked at his friend's brother. He liked Jay but didn't know how the young detective was going to deal with the news he had to tell. He also could see the worry on everyone's faces. However he looked directly at Jay to answer his question and he knew that Jay was not going to like it.
"I am not going to lie to you Jay…" Rhodes started knowing that they were not going to like what he was going to tell them. But he had no choice, they needed to know.