Best For Last: PT II
Eight
ELIZA'S POV
I've been home for a couple of hours and I can't believe Arizona is here with me. I can't believe she let me in when I called by, but to have her here with me now, the possibility of us getting back together ever present in my mind, I don't know what to do with myself. I feel like the moment I speak, it'll fall apart. I feel like the moment I make any kind of movement, I'll watch her walk out the door.
I know that isn't likely to happen since she's sitting closer to me than she has been for the best part of a year, but I'm so scared of this ending, silence seems like the best option. Mom keeps flitting in and out of the living room, but I know she's just trying to be a good host. I don't know why since she's known Arizona since forever, but she's just as nervous as me. She puts on her telephone voice when she's nervous and Arizona has even looked at me once or twice, wondering what's going on with her.
I love my mom with everything that I am, but the more nervous she is, the more terrified I become. It's like a never-ending theme around here lately, but tonight, it feels good. It feels a damn sight better than it has been, anyway.
"Ladies, I have to head out for a while…" Mom appears, again. "Will you be okay?"
"Uh, where are you going?" I furrow my brow. "It's New Year's Eve."
"You know I'm not interested in all that." Mom rolls her eyes.
"That still doesn't explain where you're going…"
"Can you mind your own business just this once?" She asks and I raise an eyebrow. "You don't have to know every detail of my life, Eliza."
"Fine." I roll my eyes. "You're being weird and I don't like it."
"Eliza, your mom doesn't want to tell you where she's going. Let her be." Arizona speaks, my heart rate soaring.
"Thank you, Arizona." Mom throws her a wink. "You and I always were on the same page." Both of them laughing, I look between them, my forehead creasing.
"Okay, now you're both being weird." I slump back in my seat.
"Goodnight, girls." Throwing a wave over her shoulder, mom disappears out of the room and I hear the front door open. "Behave yourselves."
Oh. My. God.
"Did she just…" My mouth falls open. "Did my mom just leave so we could be alone together?"
"Finally." Arizona laughs. "Thought you'd never get there."
"She didn't need to leave."
"Agreed but she obviously felt it appropriate." Arizona shrugs. "If you don't want to be alone with me, I can leave." She sits forward.
"If I don't want to be alone with you?" I grip her wrist. "In what universe is that the truth?"
"In one where this isn't happening and I'm dreaming." She gives me a sad smile. "This is real, right?"
"So real." I breathe out.
"Then I'm glad your mom left us alone." Arizona relaxes back into the same position beside me. "I've missed you, Eliza."
"I've missed you too." I lean in, pressing a kiss below her ear. "We still have a lot to figure out though…"
"I know." She takes my hand.
"Where do we even begin?" I sigh, turning and facing her fully. "I mean, I don't know where to start with any of this."
"Me neither." The gorgeous blonde sitting next to me groans. "But I know that regardless of where I am in the world, I want to be with you. I need you in my life."
"I have to try." I shift closer, now virtually in Arizona's lap. "I can't lose you again. No way."
"Then we both have to try…" She pulls me closer, settling over her legs. "Tomorrow is a new day. A new year. I want so much for us both, Eliza. Now is that time."
"I don't know how I survived this last year without you." My voice breaks. "Was it easy for you?"
"No." She gives me a sad smile. "Nothing about what we become was easy. It was crippling."
"I'm sorry I ruined your experience in London." I drop my gaze. "That was really stupid of me."
"Hey." She lifts my head. "I was the stupid one for ever going…"
"You still have to go back, though."
"I do." Arizona agrees. "But that isn't happening right now so can we just enjoy the last night of the year?" She raises an eyebrow. "I don't want the next one to begin how this one has been."
"Yes." I smile. "Yes, I want nothing more than to enjoy this night with you."
C: Can we talk, Eliza? X
E: No.
C: Please? I'm sorry for what I said. X
E: And I'm sorry you feel that way. It isn't a good time.
C: You're with her, aren't you?
E: Yeah, I am.
I'm not going to lie to Claire, I have no reason to. Arizona and I are willing to work things out, and I don't need her around for that. I know I kinda bolted earlier without saying much, but I'm sure Claire realizes what's happening here. It wasn't my intention to hurt her, but she hurt me the moment she accused me of cheating. I never would've done that to her, but now? Now, I'm looking after myself and taking back the relationship I foolishly ended.
C: I can't have meant that much to you.
E: I'm not doing this with you. Arizona and I have things to talk about.
C: You're going back to her?
E: Yeah. Yeah, I am.
C: Well, fuck you!
Hitting the settings tab on my cell, I hit the block selection and sigh. Arizona seems to be in her own world, but as of this moment, I'm free to do as I please. Kissing Arizona earlier was always going to happen, but I won't lie, I do feel kinda shitty for not officially ending things with Claire before I did.
It's 11:45 on New Year's Eve and I'm wrapped around Arizona, scared to ever let her go. She was right before when she said we should enjoy this evening and so far, I am. We are. It's been quiet and I guess we've just both been thinking, but we're together and that's what matters. Of course, I wish we could just be totally at ease but that's not possible. I don't know what the future holds for us and once Arizona leaves, I don't know the next time I'll see her.
I'm hoping I can get out to London when I have breaks from university life, but the uncertainty is still there in the back of my mind. I guess it always will be, though. I wouldn't be human if I didn't feel this way. This worry. The fear of losing her again one day.
"You wanna sit outside for a while?" Arizona asks, her nails grazing the back of my neck.
"Mm." My eyes close. "Whatever you wanna do."
"I don't care what we do if I'm being honest." Glancing over my shoulder, I give her a smile. I've been settled between her legs for the last hour or so and right now, the thought of moving, the thought of disconnecting, I don't like it. "Just happy to be here."
"Come on…" Climbing from between her legs, I pull Arizona up to her feet and we head outside, hoodies covering our bodies.
Her arms wrapping around my waist, I relax back against her and release a slight sigh. Just yesterday, I never imagined I'd be in her arms. I was planning a trip with Claire, missing my ex ridiculously.
"Hey…" I glance up at her, my head tilted. "What are we?"
"What do you wanna be?" Arizona asks.
"I want to be yours again…" I know I have things to discuss with Claire, but she made it perfectly clear what she thought of me just this afternoon. "I want us to be together again."
"Consider it done." Arizona presses a kiss to the top of my head. "I love you and I want you to be happy…"
"I'm happiest when I'm with you."
Arizona's lips find the skin of my neck, illiciting a low moan from me. God, I've missed this. My head falling back on her shoulder, her arms tighten around my waist and tears slip down my face. I don't know how this year is ending how it is, but I'm taking it. I'm taking it and I'm ready to make this work with Arizona. I'm ready to love her, regardless of the distance between us.
Knowing she never wanted to end things with me breaks my heart, but in that moment, I thought I was doing the right thing. I thought by letting her go, we would both be happier. Clearly, I was wrong. Clearly, I've been the biggest asshole on the planet.
"Are you staying the night?" My voice is barely above a whisper.
"I'd love to stay the night." Arizona's chin rests on my shoulder. "You think that would be okay?" Her hand slips up the front of my hoodie and settles on the skin of my stomach.
"Y-Yes." I whimper. "More than okay."
"You okay?" Arizona attempts to pull her hands away but I grip them.
"Don't stop doing that." Her fingertips ghost across my lower stomach. "God, I've missed you touching me…"
"Mm, I've missed it too." My girlfriend breathes out. "All I wanted was to be here with you. To hold you." Arizona turns her face into the crook of my neck. "Kissing you and just being yours…"
"Arizona…" My breath catches, her hand brushing the underside of my breast.
"Eliza…" Her voice is low.
The sound of fireworks in the distance, I glance down at Arizona's watch and realize it's midnight. Turning in her arms, my lips find hers, a low moan rumbling in her throat. Our kiss deepening, my hands slip to her perfect ass and I push her back, guiding her inside my home.
"Please, don't stop this." My girlfriend pleads, those deep blue eyes killing me. "Eliza, please…"
Her back connecting with the kitchen counter, I pull her away and drag her towards the staircase. Right now, there are too many obstacles in the way. I just need her naked and in bed with me, so if that could happen real soon, that would be amazing. Stripping her hoodie from her body as we reach the top of the stairs, she tugs the zip on my own, guiding it over my shoulders.
"Fucking beautiful…" Arizona pulls back, her eyes trailing my body. "God, you're so fucking beautiful."
"Inside the bedroom." I squeeze my thighs shut, my body craving the only person I've ever loved. "Now, Arizona."
"This is happening, right?" Finding her eyes, unshed tears welling in them, I simply smile and push her back and down on my bed. The bed I once shared with her. The bed I've made love to Arizona in so many times. This is happening and there is no doubt about that.
"W-Wait." She places her hands on my chest as I climb over her, straddling her legs.
My heart sinking, she's going to stop this. I know she is. Why wouldn't she? Just this morning, I was leaving to be with Claire, but now? Now I'm here and begging for her touch. Studying her face, she is staring back at me, that look of love she once had for me as intense as it ever was.
"W-What?" I furrow my brow, attempting to climb off her.
"Stay." She grips the waistband of my sweats and tugs me against her. "Happy New Year, Eliza."
"Happy New Year." Leaning in, my lips crush into Arizona's, that desperate need for her ever present in the forefront of my mind. My body aches for her. It throbs. Nobody in this world has ever made me feel how my girlfriend does, and nobody else ever will. Whether we're together or not, she will always be on my mind. "Arizona…"
"Tell me what you need, Eliza." Her words sending my head into a spin, I slip her shorts over her legs, her naked sex now on view only for me. Removing the final barrier covering my own body, I climb back on the bed and settle over my girlfriend.
"Shit." Tugging my bottom lip into my mouth, I dip my head and take her nipple between my teeth. "God, you've no idea how much I need you."
"I've dreamed about this moment since the second I left." Arizona's back arching from the bed, I suck a little harder, my hand dipping between her legs. "Oh, fuck." My fingertips connecting with wet heat, my eyes close and I smile against her skin.
"You're so wet…"
"I've spent a year thinking about you." She whimpers. "And I really need you…"
"You've got me." Pushing two fingers inside my girlfriend, I waste no time in giving her exactly what she wants. All breath leaving her body, her hips lift from the bed, but I push them back down. My thumb resting on her swollen clit, she gasps again and a smile forms on my mouth. "God…"
"C-Come here." Arizona pulls me closer to her. "I want you here with me." Pushing deeper, her fingertips find my own soaked center and my mouth falls open. I'm going to last all of five seconds once she truly touches me, but I don't care. Every moment that she spends at home, I'm going to take what I can get. I'm going to spend every moment wrapped up in her arms. This? This is the desperate need to reconnect. This? This is the want and need we've both craved since Arizona left for London.
"Fuck." Her own fingers slipping inside me, my head falls back on my shoulders, that familiar tightening in my stomach intensifying. "A-Arizona…"
"I'm never letting you go again." Sinking deeper with every movement, I can feel the truth in her words. I can feel the love between us. It's never not been there, but it was hard to feel at times. Now, though? Now, it's as strong as it ever was. I know, because I can feel the emotion pouring from the both of us.
"Oh, fuck." Her thumb teasing my clit, my body falls forward and I brace myself on my left hand. "Arizona, I'm so close…fuck!"
"Come for me, Eliza." She leans up, capturing my lips. "God, I need to feel you come undone for me." Mumbling against my mouth, I ride her hand, never slowing my own pace inside her. "That's it." She moans, my walls squeezing her fingers.
"Oh, god. I'm coming." Falling over the edge, my body shakes and writhes against her, her own walls squeezing me, begging for release. Sliding down her body, I suck her clit into my mouth, adding a third finger.
"Oh, shit!" Her legs trembling, I curl my fingers and hit the spot that drives her insane. "Fuck, yes. Don't stop." Shaking, Arizona grips the back of my head, her fingers tangling in my hair. "Y-Yes." Coming hard, arousal covers my fingers, coating the tip of my tongue. "F-Fuck."
"Mm." Lapping up everything I can, I press a kiss to the inside of her thigh, my fingers slowly pulling out. "God, I've missed you." Dropping down beside Arizona, she turns on her side, studying my eyes. "I love you, Arizona." My voice breaks. "I love you so much."
"I love you, too."
Thanks for reading, guys. Reviews are welcome and appreciated as always.