"Wow." Castiel repeated under his breath as he walked through his apartment, Dean by his side. "Just... wow, Dean."
"Looks good, huh?"
Castiel's eyes drifted over the place in amazement. Together, he and Dean had completely transformed it. It had taken a little over a week of them working together every afternoon after Castiel came home from work. They'd fallen into an easy routine - once Castiel was home, Dean would come over and they would work. They shared dinner and talked about anything and everything. After dinner they would either get back to work, or get caught up in each other until it was time for Castiel to sleep. Then Dean would leave, and the whole routine would start again the next day. They'd never really taken the time to appreciate the transformation while they were working on it, but now it was clear.
He felt guilty about taking so much of Dean's time, but he never said anything. He didn't want to miss the chance to get to know the man, and with each day that passed he felt them growing closer. It was worth every second, he thought as they took in the fruits of their labour. The walls were painted in a very light shade of blue that seemed to brighten the room by itself. Dean had built shelves and installed them into the walls, staggered to look like steps leading up. Castiel would be able to store most of his books there.
All the cupboards in the kitchen now had new doors on them, sanded lightly and varnished to bring the grain of the wood out beautifully. The pantry had been fixed, no more curtain to hide its contents, and the new doors matched the kitchen beautifully. Dean had even mounted the TV on the wall, enabling him to recycle the wood from the broken coffee table. He'd used the wood to build a small unit into the wall underneath the tv for Castiel to store his various accessories.
They'd moved the couch closer to the TV, which left enough room between the lounge room and the kitchen so that the dining table wasn't in such a small space. He could actually have six chairs around it and sit on both sides, instead of the three chairs he'd had before. Dean had found matching chairs at a thrift store and brought them in. They had quite enjoyed eating dinner there tonight, chatting across the table to each other.
"Dean, this is more than I could have imagined." Castiel turned to him, wetness stinging at his eyes. "Thank you."
"You haven't seen the bedroom yet." Dean grinned, beckoning Castiel to follow.
"Oh? You mean I'm allowed to have my bedroom back now?"
Dean just laughed and took Castiel's hand to pull him along. Castiel had been banned from his own bedroom for the past two nights - Dean had been working on it in short bursts throughout the week, then covered the walls with sheets and forbidden Cas from looking. Then he'd told Castiel to sleep on the couch instead, since he could no longer properly hide his work.
"I hope you like it." Dean sounded nervous as he pushed the door open, and motioned inside.
Castiel smiled reassuringly at him, then stepped into the dark room. Moments later the light was flicked on, and he gasped aloud, floored. All four walls were painted with a captivating forest scene. The image of trees stretched from floor to ceiling, complete with little flowers amid long grass at the bottom of the walls. He stepped closer, reaching out to touch the little bees painted on the flowers - he smiled up at the image of a bird sitting in a nest in one of the trees. A small pond was carefully painted into the wall, making it look like it was in the distance. It was almost exactly like the place he'd spent most of his childhood - the place he escaped reality.
"Dean..." He breathed, turning to look at the man still leaning against the door frame. "This is... It's beautiful."
"Ya, well... It's not perfect. I just, I remembered what you told me about the forest you used to go to as a kid. And how much you liked watching the birds, and the insects. I know you said you can't go back there, but I thought this, well it might make you feel-"
Castiel was on him in an instant, kissing the words from his lips and effectively cutting him off. He felt the smile against his lips before Dean was kissing back, their lips moving seamlessly until they were both breathless.
"Dean," Castiel gasped out finally, cupping the man's face in his hands as he rested their foreheads together. "This is more than perfect. Thank you."
Dean stared back at him, a pleased smile lifting his lips up. He leaned forward and they were kissing again, more heated than before. Castiel's dick twitched in interest and he moaned softly against the man's lips as his hands moved under his shirt, splaying out across the soft skin on his sides.
"Thank you, Dean.. Thank you.." Castiel repeated in a whisper as his lips worshipped the man's neck.
"Ah- Cas, you know what that does to me-"
"I know."
Castiel grinned against Dean's skin before he nipped lightly, loving the soft whimper he drew from the man as Dean arched against him. He decided in that moment exactly what he wanted to do. He pushed them back against the wall hard, meeting Dean's lips for a filthy kiss before stepping back again.
"Wha-" Dean complained as Castiel pulled away, eyes searching his own.
Castiel just shot him a seductive little smirk, then dropped heavily to his knees in front of the man. His hands hastily worked at the clasp of Dean's pants, watching the moment that understanding lit Dean's eyes and he gasped. He shot him another wicked grin before jerking his pants down hurriedly, licking his lips in anticipation as Dean's cock sprang free, already rock hard and leaking.
"Oh shit oh shit oh- ohhh..."
Dean's cursing cut off on a moan as Castiel enveloped the cock inside his mouth. His tongue swirled around the head, eliciting a series of short moans before he bobbed down, taking as much of Dean's shaft into his mouth as he could with his fist wrapped around the base. Dean's fingers tangled into his hair and pulled slightly, and Castiel moaned deep in his throat. The vibration pleased Dean, if the tremble in his knees was anything to go by, so Castiel moaned again. At the same time his fist tightened, stroking the man's shaft slow and firm as his glanced up to lock eyes with Dean.
"Shit.. Fuck, Cas! Keep that- Unh- up and I won't - shit- I won't last long!"
Castiel pulled back far enough for Dean's cock to pop out of his mouth, letting the tip rest on his lips as his hand kept working it. He stared up at Dean with that wicked grin, a thrill shooting straight to his own twitching cock at the way the man watched him with lust and desire.
"That's the idea, Dean." He hummed before engulfing Dean's cock in his mouth again, doubling his efforts.
"Oh for the love of- Fuck!"
Dean gasped and arched as Castiel pressed his tongue firmly against his shaft, bobbing his head in time with his hand. His other hand slipped inside his own pants, moaning around Dean as he squeezed his own rock hard shaft.
"Fuck Cas, that's hot- wanna see you-"
Castiel leaned back again, glancing up at Dean.
"You want to see me jerk off while I suck your cock?"
"Yesss.." Dean hissed, his own hand moving to grab at his cock.
It took some manoeuvring, but soon Castiel had his pants pushed down and one hand wrapped around his own shaft. Sucking Dean off was exciting him so much that he had to pause, clamping his hand around the base of his cock, letting the fire in his belly abate before continuing.
Once he could continue he leaned forward again and flicked the tip of Dean's cock with his tongue, swirling it around the head before taking Dean down again. The moans were louder now, and he could feel Dean watching him as he writhed against the wall. It sent thrills of excitement through him, and he caught himself groaning throatily as he bucked into his own hand, fire curling in his belly.
"Fuck, Cas, I'm gonna come... So close, Fuck, yes-"
Castiel moaned again, his hand tightening and moving faster on Dean's shaft as he felt it stiffen in his hand. The noises Dean was making were purely pornographic, and he felt the man go still, fingers tightening in Castiel's hair as the first spurts of Dean's come shot down his throat.
"Cas, shit, CAS!"
Dean screamed out as his come flooded Castiel's mouth. Castiel swallowed it down then moaned out as his own balls drew up tight. He pulled himself a few more times before he shuddered, shooting come all over himself and Dean's leg as he came in tandem.
He let Dean's cock slip from his mouth as the man dropped to the floor, landing on his ass. They stared at each other, both panting in exertion, before Dean pulled him in for a long kiss, tasting himself on Castiel's tongue. Castiel's arms wrapped around him, and when they broke, Dean rested his head on Castiel's shoulder.
"Jesus, Cas." Dean whispered after awhile. "That's gotta be one of the best thank you's I've ever gotten."
"One of?" Castiel pulled back and stared at Dean, raising one eyebrow.
"Okay, maybe the best." Dean laughed. Then his face dropped and, following his line of sight, Castiel realised he had glanced at the clock on the bedside table. "Shit, Cas, it's nearly nine! You're gonna be exhausted for work tomorrow!"
"Dean," Castiel laughed as he stood and helped the confused man up off the floor. "Tomorrow is my day off again. Remember?"
"Oh." Dean chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment. "Forgot."
"Mmhm. So, why don't we go shower and get cleaned up?" Castiel asked.
"Oh. Um. Well, I suppose I really should be getting home. It is late."
Castiel paused, looking Dean over as he considered whether or not he trusted the man to stay the night. Really, he had gotten to know Dean pretty well over the past two weeks. And he did like having him around. And it really would be more convenient if Dean only had to pop next door to start work in the morning.
"Or, you could stay here." He suggested quietly. "If you want to, that is."
Dean just stared at him, those candy apple green eyes locking on his with... something, in their depths. Castiel tensed, waiting for the rejection that was sure to come. Yet it didn't come - instead Dean simply nodded and smiled, then turned and headed for the bathroom with Castiel following.
"You want to do what?" Dean asked, his fork full of eggs stopped halfway to his mouth.
"I said, I want to come and help you in the apartment." Castiel repeated, taking a small bite of bacon as he pushed his diary across the table.
Dean's eyes flicked down to the list as he continued to eat breakfast. On one side was a schedule of everything they had done yesterday. Today's date was less defined. There wasn't a long list of items to do; instead, there was simply a line drawn from eight am to seven pm, with "Help Dean" scrawled in the middle.
"But Cas," Dean started, "It's your day off, man. You're s'posed to relax."
"Dean. You have been working non stop for over a week, between there and here. Let me help you now."
Dean looked down at his plate, obviously thinking. Castiel allowed him a few moments, then plowed on.
"I know it's hard work. But you've taught me so much. I'm sure there's something I can do."
"Well..." Dean chewed his lip, and Castiel knew he'd already won. "I guess, there's a bit of drilling to do. So I can put the furniture together. And some sanding, you can handle a sander right?"
"Of course. You just need to show me what to do." Castiel had never used a sander, but he knew how to drill, and he figured he could learn on the job.
"Well, if it's what you want. I don't know if I can get dad to pay you, though. I'm not even supposed to have anyone else there."
"You don't need to do that, Dean. I just want to help you."
Dean frowned slightly, but he relented with a nod. By this point they had finished breakfast, and they rinsed the dishes off together. It took a bit longer than it should have, seeing as how Castiel kept flicking water at Dean, who retaliated by snapping the tea towel at his ass.
Finally, after half an hour of shenanigans, they were dressed for work. Castiel carried the toolbox out of the apartment, shrieking as Dean snapped the towel at him again. Both dissolved into fits of laughter as Castiel locked the door.
"Well, what do we have here."
Castiel's blood ran cold as he spun around to face the owner of the dark voice. There, standing across the hall, stood Uriel. The man's lips curled up into a frightening smirk as Castiel pressed himself back against the door, feeling his heart rate rise. This man seemed to trigger his anxiety nearly every time, always had.
"Cas?" Dean's hand slipped into his, grounding him.
"Well, look at that. Come here to scare one fairy, and I get two." Uriel chuckled. "Must be my lucky day."
"Who the fuck do you think you are?" Dean growled, instantly defensive.
Castiel tried to pull him back as Dean stepped in front of him, but the man stood firm. He didn't want Dean to get hurt on his account, and he had no idea how far Uriel would go. The look in the man's eyes made him scared.
"Dean, don't."
"Dean, don't" Uriel mocked him as he stepped toward the pair. "Listen to lover-boy, Dean. I only want him."
"Yeah? Well, sorry tiny, but you're gonna have to get through me first."
"Okay then."
At the same moment that Uriel stepped forward and grabbed Dean's shirt, Castiel screamed his name, trying to pull him back. He didn't notice Dean's other hand, which had snatched a box cutter from his belt. Dean's hand swung up and swiped across Uriel's arm, and several things happened at once.
Uriel released Dean with an agonised cry, clutching his cut arm to his chest.
Dean stumbled forward, suddenly off balance, toward the hulk of a man who had rage in his eyes.
Castiel reached forward and grabbed him, pulling Dean back to himself and holding him tight.
The elevator dinged and the doors opened, to reveal the apartment block manager along with two police officers. The manager pointed at the man with a yell of "That's him!"
Uriel growled as he noticed the three new arrivals, then pointed at Castiel and Dean threateningly.
"I'll be back for you two."
Then he fled down the fire escape, the officers following him. The manager approached Castiel quietly, who was busy checking Dean over for any injuries. Dean was fine, but Castiel couldn't stop the trembling that had taken over his whole body.
"Breathe, Cas. Just breathe. It's okay, he's gone."
Castiel hadn't realised until that moment that his breathing was fast and shallow. He tried to listen, but he couldn't quite get the panic under control. Not until Dean took his hand and laid it on his chest. His other hand covered Castiel's eyes, forcing him to lose one of his senses so that he could focus on the feel of Dean's chest rising and falling evenly. Slowly, he matched his breathing to Dean's and found himself calming down, his breathing and heart rate returning to normal.
Once he was calmed down, Dean removed his hands. Castiel opened his eyes and gave him a soft smile of thanks, before turning to the apartment manager, who was patiently standing off to the side.
"Mr. Novak, are you okay?" The short man asked timidly.
"I- yes, I'm fine thank you." Castiel answered, slipping his hand back inside Dean's.
"I see you two have made up." The man smirked, pointedly glancing at their joined hands. His face quickly turned grim, however. "But you seem to have found a new trouble. Do you know that man?"
"Yes." Castiel answered with a quick glance at Dean. He still hadn't told the man about Uriel. "Um. I used to work with him."
"Is there a reason he might want to hurt you?" The man asked.
"Um. Probably because I cost him his job. He said that was going to cost me."
"Wait, what? Cas, why didn't you tell me?!" Dean asked, his eyes turning worried.
"We weren't on the - ah - best of terms, then..." Castiel trailed off, a blush creeping up his neck at the memory of that particular night.
"...Oh."
"Mr. Novak, I'm going to have to ask you to give a statement to the police." The manager told him. "You can come with me to wait for them to come back."
"Actually, I have some work to get to." Castiel answered, his hand tightening on Dean's. "But I will be in that apartment there, when they get back."
"Cas, you don't have to, we can-"
"We need to get to work, Dean." Castiel glanced at him meaningfully, and Dean mercifully seemed to understand.
"Right... right, yeah. We've got some work to do. There." Dean pointed to the apartment door needlessly, then nodded to the manager. "We'll be going now."
"Yes. Yes of course. I'll send them up." The manager replied, confusion on his face. "Good day."
As the manager left, Castiel was pulled to the next apartment behind Dean. The door closed, and he turned to see Dean holding his arms out invitingly. A look of confusion crossed his face, until Dean beckoned him again. Then, with a choked sob, he fell against the man. He hadn't even realised that he'd been crying until he was wrapped in Dean's arms, both men sliding down to the floor as Castiel just let all of it out.
"It's alright, Cas. I got you."
Somehow that phrase only brought the tears on faster. It had been such a long time since somebody had held him, comforted him like this. So long since he had felt safe and taken care of. He wondered briefly how he had survived without Dean, before, as he sniffled and hiccuped in the man's arms. He felt Dean's hand in his hair, stroking through the strands comfortingly as he whispered soft words of comfort in his ear.
They stayed there for a long time. Castiel heard someone knocking on the door, but he didn't care. He didn't notice Dean call for the visitor to come in, nor did he notice the police officers stepping around them, eyeing Castiel with concern. He felt Dean tense, but he didn't notice the pointed look he shot the officers as one of them reached for Castiel. The second officer nudged the first and, taking the hint, both retreated further into the apartment to wait.
It took awhile, but eventually Castiel's sobbing subsided. Dean pulled back, moving his hand to Castiel's chin so that he could tilt his head up to meet eyes.
"You alright?" Dean asked him quietly, wiping the tears off his cheeks.
"No." Castiel answered honestly, sniffling and rubbing at red eyes. "But I will be. I think. I'm sorry, Dean."
"Sorry? For what?" Dean looked confused.
"Falling on you." Castiel half chuckled, gesturing at their position on the floor.
"Cas." Dean cupped his face in his hands, staring into his eyes. "Don't be. My arms are here. You can fall into them, anytime you need."
"Dean.." Castiel leaned forward, hugging the man tight. This time there were no tears, but an overwhelming tightness in his chest.
"We might want to get up soon, though. The police are waiting." Dean chuckled, kissing his lips gently.
"Oh. Oh. They're here? I didn't-"
"It's fine. You needed time. They waited. Come on."
Dean stood and offered a hand. With a smile, Castiel took his hand and stood, and continued to hold the offered hand. Dean paused, waiting for confirmation; Castiel nodded, then followed him out to where the police were waiting.
"Dean, what's wrong?" Castiel asked later, over the dinner they had ordered in.
"Nothin'." Dean frowned as he picked at the king prawn omelette he had ordered.
"Dean." Castiel put his fork down and stared at him levelly. "You've been off all afternoon. If you just tell me what's wrong-"
"I said it's nothin'!" Dean yelled, standing up quickly. "Fuck, Cas, can't you just leave shit alone!"
Castiel rocked back in his chair, shocked by the outburst. He didn't move as Dean stormed up the hall, until he heard the bathroom door slam. His head dropped into his hands as he leant forward on the table, wondering where it had all gone wrong. Everything had been fine this morning - was he angry at Uriel? At the Police? At the way Castiel himself had reacted?
First came the crushing despair at the idea that maybe Dean thought less of him. Then came anger. No, Dean wasn't about to get away with yelling and slamming doors that easily. His eyes narrowed as he pushed himself up, following the man.
Moments later he was pounding on the locked bathroom door.
"Dean! Stop being an ass and get out here! Explain yourself!"
"No! Just fuck off, Cas!"
"So help me Dean, I will break this- Oh shit!"
Castiel broke off on a cried out curse as the door was suddenly wrenched open, leaving him flailing in free air. Moments later he was falling - not forwards as he had expected, but backwards. They hit the wall, Dean falling onto him heavily and effectively pinning him to the wall as his mouth plundered Castiel's.
"Mmph! Dean- Ah- We need to-" Castiel muttered out between kisses.
"Shut the fuck up would ya." Dean snapped at him, then started sucking a mark roughly into Castiel's neck.
"Oh- Ahh, Dean - Okay..." Castiel relented, feeling himself harden quickly.
Dean gave no ground. He sucked and bit hard marks into Castiel's neck, then moved back up, licking into his mouth and nipping at his lip aggressively. It was all he could do to keep up with the man as they stumbled blindly to the bedroom, shedding clothes along the way.
Finally Castiel felt the edge of the bed against the back of his knees but before he could react, Dean was throwing him back on the bed with practiced ease. As he watched Dean climb up to straddle him, whimpering with excitement. He could tell this was heading toward angry, rage fuelled sex and it was going to be hard and fast.
As he reached up to Dean, he suddenly found his wrists in a strong grip yanked above his head and pinned down. He stared up in surprise at Dean, meeting hard eyes that made him unsure if he should be worried or not. Yet his cock twitched, hardening further with excitement at this turn of events.
"Don't touch. Don't talk." Dean growled, curling down over Castiel so their lips were inches apart. "Just... just..."
"Yess..." Castiel hissed, bucking up into Dean desperately.
Dean bit his bottom lip hard, causing him to cry out with the fine pain and pleasure combination. He felt something slide around his wrists and tighten, instantly recognising the feel of his own belt. His wrists were secured to the bed head - loose enough that if he tried, he could get free. He didn't try.
He watched with hooded eyes as Dean retrieved the bottle of lube from the bedside table. He squeezed some into his hand, then Castiel gasped and arched as that hand closed around his cock and started jerking him roughly. No smooth build-up, then.
He whimpered and writhed on the bed, his nerve endings on fire as Dean pulled on his shaft. Then suddenly all touch was gone and he arched up with a cry, trying to follow after it.
"Patience, princess," Dean chuckled, moving up.
Castiel realised he was positioning himself over his cock with absolutely no prep, and he felt a jolt of fear through the excitement. Dean's hands dug into his shoulders as the man wriggled his hips, getting Castiel's cock head in just the right spot before starting to push down.
"Dean, wait, you haven't- AH!"
They cried out together as Dean sunk down hard on Castiel's cock. Dean curled over Castiel, panting for breath against the burn and sting as his nails dug hard into skin. Castiel panted as he desperately tried not to move, for fear of hurting the man more than he obviously already had.
Then, unbelievably soon, Dean started to pull off him, waiting until Castiel had almost slipped out before ramming down in an instantly punishing pace. Loud grunts and groans fell from his lips on every thrust, laced with pain, and Castiel couldn't help staring at the man in awe and shock as he fucked himself on his shaft.
"Fuckfuckfuck yes, harder, oh my god," Dean was panting in between obscene noises.
Castiel couldn't hold back anymore. He thrust his hips up, meeting Dean's movements to bury himself even deeper in his ass. He strained against the belt, against the bed itself, pushing up harder as he lost control. He realised the cries and whimpers were coming from his own mouth.
"Dean I can't- can't hold on- Dean please-" Castiel choked out, fire running white hot through his body.
"Don't you dare," Dean growled, then groaned out again as he slammed down even harder, if that were possible. "Don't you stop.. Gonna come..."
"Come for me Dean.. Come on me.." Castiel whimpered, trying to meet Dean's erratic thrusts even as he tried to hold back.
He arched out a cry as he felt Dean's nails drag down his chest, felt the shuddering in his body - then Dean threw his head back and screamed, slamming down one last time and holding as he shuddered out his orgasm untouched, hot ropes of come pulsing out to cover Castiel's chest.
"Dean!"
Castiel gasped out, his vision going white as he felt Dean clench around him. His balls drew up tight, then fire shot through his cock as he emptied himself into him, bucking and crying out as the intense pleasure overtook him.
It seemed to last forever, both suspended in pleasure. Then suddenly it ended and they both went limp, shaking in each other's arms as Dean collapsed on his chest.
They lay there for a long time, enjoying the slight shocks that pulsed through them after. He wriggled his wrists free and wrapped an arm around Dean, using his fingers to gently trace soothing patterns on his back. It took some time before he noticed the wetness on his shoulder, where Dean's head rested.
"Dean?" He asked quietly.
"I don't wanna lose you." Came the muffled response. "Don't wanna *sniffle* lose this. Don't wanna go home."
"Then don't." Castiel whispered back, worried. He brought his other hand up to gently stroke through Dean's hair. "Stay here. Stay with me."
"Nothin's ever that easy. Not for me." Dean choked out a half-laugh, half-sob. "Cas, I'm scared. This... it's happened so fast and- and what if we lose it as fast?"
Castiel knew what he meant. It was truly terrifying how deeply he felt for Dean, in such a short time. But, as cliche as it seemed, he felt like he'd been looking for Dean his whole life. Like this man was the one thing that had been missing all along. Maybe, perhaps, Dean felt the same way.
He cradled Dean's face in his hands, pushing him back so that he could stare into red rimmed, wet green eyes. His thumbs gently moved over his cheeks, wiping away the tears that had been falling.
"Then we take it as it comes. One day at a time. I'm not going anywhere." His eyes searched Dean's, begging the man silently to believe him, trust him. "Stay, Dean. Stay with me."
Moments passed, simply searching each other's eyes. Then slowly, Dean nodded, and a smile lit up his face. Castiel returned the smile, his chest tightening in a most pleasurable way.
"Let's go take a shower."
A/N:
Welp, this is going in a different direction than I planned.
Once again the way of dealing with that panic attack was from my own experiences.
It goes without saying, but don't try that last bit at home. Anal tears aren't fun. _
Please leave a comment if you liked it! Or even if you didn't! I appreciate constructive criticism if it helps my writing! (Not if you just don't like the idea, that's why we are all different :) )