Castiel startled awake, blinking around in confusion. He wasn't sure what had woken him up, given that he had the day off work and it was still dark. He glanced at the clock - five thirty am. Perhaps it was just his body clock? That thought went out the window when a loud, obnoxious ringing sliced through the room, and he groaned aloud.
"Dean," He groaned, shoving the warm lump that was laying half on top of him. "Dean, your phone."
"Don' care." Dean mumbled grumpily, burrowing his head into Castiel's chest. "G'back to sleep."
He rolled his eyes and huffed in annoyance, wriggling around as he tried to reach the phone on the bedside table with the arm that was currently trapped by Dean's weight. He supposed he couldn't blame the man for his sleepiness; Castiel was far too used to being wide awake as soon as he woke up.
Finally, after a lot of reaching and a lot of grumbled protests from Dean, his fingers brushed the phone. He managed to get hold of it and answered just in time, not looking at the number.
"Hello?" He sighed as he rested back against the pillows.
"Dean?! Are you okay? Bobby called, what happened? Are you-"
"Wait, wait stop!" Castiel got out over the panicked voice. "Dean's asleep."
"Asleep? But it's-" There was a slight scuffling sound through the phone. "Oh. Right. Sorry. Wait, um, who's this then?"
"Castiel. And you are?" He snipped, trying to extract himself from Dean's grip.
"Oh, right, Bobby mentioned you. I'm Sam."
"Oh, of course. Sam, could you just give me one moment?" Castiel asked, grumbling as Dean's arms circled his waist.
"Yeah, sure."
He put the phone on the table, using both hands to gently push Dean away and slip out of the bed. Dean grumbled, a frown creasing his face until he pushed a pillow into the man's searching arms. He chuckled to himself as Dean nuzzled into the pillow, his face clearing again. The man really was adorable sometimes.
He picked the phone back up and left the bedroom, padding out to the kitchen so he could talk without disturbing Dean.
"Apologies, Sam. I can talk now. So what did Bobby tell you?" He pressed a button on the coffee machine, starting the brew.
"Oh. Um. Well, he told me there was an incident with Dad, Dean got hurt, and he came out there.. Said that Dean wanted to apologise, and Dad was in jail so, uh, I guess I just wanted to make sure Dean was okay. I didn't realise the time. Sorry."
"It's fine, Sam." Castiel laughed softly, tapping as he waited for the coffee pot to fill. "I'm usually up before two am, so this is a sleep in for me. But anyway, yes Dean is okay. Shaken and confused, I think, maybe feeling guilty. Physically, he's got a black eye and a split lip, but nothing serious."
After their nap the day before, Dean had let him clean him up, then they had spent a while talking. Dean had been pretty closed off and quiet, barely giving answers to Castiel's questions, until eventually he had given up and they just watched a movie. They'd curled around each other, both seeking comfort, and eventually went to bed.
"Oh god." Sam breathed. "I didn't think- I knew, when we were kids, but I thought it stopped... Didn't he fight back?"
"Sam," Castiel sighed as he sat down with his cup of coffee. "I don't think it ever stopped. When it happened, he was... terrified. I've come to know Dean as the strongest, most amazing man I have ever met. But when he faced that, he- well, he was still a child. And I imagine he felt like he couldn't fight back, like he was powerless. I sent for help, because I don't think Dean would have. He told me that when he asked for help before, the police blamed him instead."
"Yeah, they were pretty shitty when we were little." Sam huffed out a sad laugh. "God, if I'd only stayed-"
"Sam, stop it. Honestly, does blaming yourself run in the family or something?" Castiel cut him off, suddenly annoyed. "If you had stayed, I feel that nothing would have been different. Dean is a protector - he would have kept taking the beatings to protect you."
"He told you that?!" Sam drew a shocked breath.
"No. But it wasn't hard to figure out."
Silence. Castiel took a few mouthfuls of coffee, mulling over the words in his head before he spoke them aloud.
"I really think you need to have this conversation with him in person." He spoke gently this time.
"Yeah." Sam breathed. "Yeah, you're probably right. Just, Dean doesn't do great with emotions, you know."
"He can be difficult, that's true, but I find talking helps."
"...really? You got him to talk?"
"Is that unusual?" Castiel frowned as he sipped his coffee.
"For Dean? Very. He doesn't tend to talk things through a lot."
"Hm." Castiel stared into the now empty cup. "Listen Sam. Why don't you come over. I don't think Dean will be working today, somehow, and he'll be more comfortable here. You can talk about everything and figure things out."
"Uh, yeah, sure. I can do that. I'll take the day off work. Where do you live?"
Castiel rattled off the address, along with directions of how to get into the underground parking.
"Okay. I can be there in, uh, half an hour?" Sam asked, nervousness lacing his voice.
"Dean will still be asleep." Castiel told him, chuckling softly.
"That's fine." Sam answered, making Castiel sit back in confusion. "I.. Well, you seem like an important person in his life. And I'd like to meet you. If that's okay?"
"Oh. Well, yes of course, then."
"Great. Great, I'll see you soon."
Castiel agreed and soon ended the call. He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face, his head tipping back slightly. Yesterday had been emotionally exhausting, and he had the feeling today would be the same. It wasn't that he minded, just that he had to prepare himself for a long day.
While he waited, he moved around the kitchen, pulling ingredients from the fridge. He figured since he was up anyway, he might as well make some food for Sam and, later on, for Dean. The process was calming, and he found time passing easily. He hoped he was making the right choice, bringing Sam here. While he was pretty certain, his anxiety left doubts about Dean's feelings on the matter. Perhaps he should have asked the man if it was alright first?
By the time he heard a soft knock on the door, he had just pulled bacon, egg and cheese breakfast muffins out of the oven. He left them on the counter to cool while he went to the door and welcomed Sam, leading him into the apartment.
"So, how long have you and Dean been, uh.. Friends?" Sam asked as Castiel poured two cups of coffee.
"Oh. About..." Did Sam know about Dean's orientation? Castiel couldn't remember, so he decided to leave the hidden question hanging. "Four or five weeks?"
"Wow. And he talks to you about things?" Sam raised his eyebrows in surprise, accepting the offered coffee with a grateful nod.
"Yes, most of the time. As I said I know he can be difficult, but he comes round pretty quickly." Castiel answered, offering the muffins. "Has he not always been that way?"
"Not at all. I mean, when we were kids he'd do anything to avoid talking about feelings," Sam started to tell him. "Seriously, there was this one time..."
"And then no kidding, he jumped off the roof in those underpants and that cape, screaming 'I'm Batman!'"
Sam and Castiel both dissolved into laughter to the point where he had to wipe tears from his eyes, shaking his head in disbelief. They had spent hours talking about the pair of brothers, and the stories ranged from impossibly miserable to downright hilarious. Neither of them noticed the footsteps approaching until Dean appeared, yawning and rubbing his eyes grumpily.
"Cas? What's goin on?"
"Oh! Dean! Sorry if we woke you." Castiel started to stand, but Sam beat him to it, stepping away from the table slightly.
"Dean."
Dean blinked in confusion, rubbed his eyes, then blinked again. "...Sammy?"
The next thing any of them knew, Sam had crossed the distance in long strides and swept Dean up into a strong embrace. Castiel couldn't help a soft chuckle as he watched the brothers greet each other with massive hugs and excited talking. Knowing what Dean was like in the mornings, he went to the kitchen and started another pot of coffee. He knew to hand Dean caffeine before the excitement wore off and grumpiness set back in.
"I can't believe how much you've grown Sammy, you're massive!"
"And you've filled out, look at this-" Sam poked at the muscle around Dean's abs, making the man chuckle.
"Stop that! Ah, man, it's so good to see you, been too long." Another round of hugs.
"Yeah, it's been what five years?"
Castiel glanced up as he put new cups of coffee on the table, concerned at the way the brothers had suddenly sobered and gone silent. He could see the guilt that ran through Dean's face as he looked down, and wished he could comfort him. But he stayed at the table, denying any touch in front of Sam. He was going to keep his distance until - if - Dean chose to initiate it.
"I- I'm sorry." Dean said quietly. "I shoulda come to see you. Made more of an effort."
"I should have realised that you were still under Dad's control." Sam made a face as they walked to the table together. "I, um. Well, I thought you'd... become like him."
The two went silent, staring at each other miserably. Castiel realised then that it was a good time to leave them alone, so that they could talk freely. He knew Dean didn't mind him being there, but Sam didn't know him. Yes, it would be better to leave them be, at least for twenty minutes or so, just to clear the air on this bit. He formed a plan, and within a few moments he had the kitchen trash bag in his hands and was clearing his throat to get their attention.
"I'm just going to take the trash out and leave you two to talk, alright? I won't be long."
Dean nodded in response, shooting him a grateful smile. The man obviously understood Castiel's reasoning, and it made him smile at how well they could read each other in such a small amount of time. With a small nod to Sam, he made his way out of the apartment.
He took the elevator down to the underground parking, where the trash carts were also kept. As the doors closed, he pondered on Sam's presence in their lives. He was happy for Dean, of course he was, but the niggling doubts in the back of his mind were back. He wondered if Dean would leave now - move in with his brother, leaving Castiel as a fond memory. The thoughts brought his mood down quickly, and he found his eyes welling with tears as he stepped out of the elevator and headed for the trash carts.
He was so involved in his thoughts that he didn't hear someone approach from behind - all he knew was that a strong hand grabbed him from behind, something soft and smelly slipped over his mouth and nose, and then everything went black.
"So then Dad put me on this job." Dean sat back in the chair, draining the last of his coffee. "That's when I met Cas. Poor guy. Man, his life was stress free before I came barging into it."
"Hm." Sam sat back, a slight smile on his face.
"What?" Dean frowned, noticing the grin.
"I can't be sure, I've just met the guy after all, but I don't think he really minds. You seem to be, ah.. pretty close."
"Well, yeah man, we've become fast friends." Dean could feel the nervousness creeping in as talk drifted to a topic he wasn't sure he was comfortable discussing yet. "But, I dunno, I think I should back off a bit. Let him have his life back. He's done a lot for me."
"Wow. Castiel was right, you have started to open up."
"Shut up. Bitch."
"Jerk." Sam grinnned at the old banter. "But seriously Dean. I don't think he wants you to back off. Can I ask though, are you guys.. you know..."
"Are we what?" Dean scowled, trying to avoid the question as long as he could.
"Together."
"Pfft. Sam, come on." Dean flushed slightly, really not wanting to discuss this. He glanced at the clock out of habit- then frowned. "Wait.. Where's Cas?"
"He's taking the trash out, now can you stop avoiding the question?"
"No, Sammy, seriously. It's been over half an hour."
They both fell silent, listening carefully in the quiet. There was no sound of Castiel moving around in the apartment - besides, Dean was sure he would have announced himself. He glanced at Sam momentarily, then they stood as one. Dean felt a shock of fear shoot through him, considering recent events.
"I'll check the apartment." Sam said quickly.
"I'll check downstairs," Dean said at the same time.
It was strange, Dean thought to himself, how he and Sam quickly fell into old ways. Back when John had been obsessed with the idea of a supernatural world existing, he had trained the two of them like soldiers. Even after their mothers' death had been proven to be a horrible accident, he'd continued to train them - he just gave up on pretty much every other aspect of life. Now, without even thinking about it, they had slipped back into that training the moment they realised Castiel was missing.
No. Not missing. He was just late. Dean was sure, as he hit the button and watched the elevator doors close, that he was going to find Cas safe and sound in one piece, probably talking to a stray dog or some shit. Yeah, that had to be it. Somehow, as hard as he tried to convince himself, it still didn't ease the worry in his gut.
"Cas?" Dean called as he stepped out of the elevator. "Cas, where are you?"
He frowned as there was no reply, turning toward the trash carts. He froze, however, when he saw the bag on the ground - the same kitchen trash that Castiel had taken out, nowhere near where it should have been. It had been dropped a bare few paces from the elevator.
"No... no, he's gotta be here... Cas? CAS!"
He searched the parking lot, and outside the apartment block, calling out for Castiel and muttering to himself the whole time as panic started to creep in. He tried to tell himself that Castiel had probably just gone for a walk or something, but he knew it wasn't true. Castiel wouldn't just leave.
His fears were confirmed when he spotted something small and rectangle near a pillar in the parking lot. He prayed as he walked closer, begging it not to be what he thought it was. But when he picked it up, his fears were confirmed.
It was Castiel's phone.
"Bobby, we've got a situation. We need you to come to Castiel's house." Sam spoke into his phone, pacing the lounge room. "Yeah. He's.. um... missing."
Dean sat at the table, head down, just staring at the phone in his hands. He felt... numb. Like he should be doing something, saying something, but he couldn't force himself to do so much as move.
"Yeah. Okay. Umm... I'm not sure. Dean?" Sam glanced over at his brother and sighed. "He's... not doing too well. Just get here soon okay? Okay. Bye."
Dean's hands tightened around the phone that he held, tensing as Sam walked closer. It was hard to think that not even an hour ago he had been talking about whether to back off or not. Now Cas was just... gone. He couldn't process it.
"We'll find him, Dean."
"Yeah. Yeah, I hope so, man. I just-" Dean stopped and shook his head, fighting back the overwhelming sadness. "I dunno. I just.. wish everything would go right for a change. Seems like everything keeps going bad around me."
"This isn't your fault Dean." Sam frowned at him, wondering when his brother's self esteem had gotten so low. "Bad things just.. happen, sometimes. You can't blame yourself for it."
"I just don't know what else to do." Dean frowned, glaring at the table. "I don't even know where to look for him."
"What about... people he knows? Is there people you can call, check in if they have seen him?" Sam asked, then pointed to the phone. "You can call his contacts. It's a start, right?"
"Yeah. Yeah, you're right."
Dean gave a sad, but grateful smile, feeling for the first time like he could do something useful. He unlocked the phone and started scrolling through the contacts, looking for familiar names that had come up in conversation previously. He recognised a fair few of the names, and made a mental list of who to call.
"I'll make more coffee." Sam said as Dean started dialling the first number.
As Castiel slowly came to, the first thing he noticed was a killer headache. He groaned quietly, wincing against the pain. What the hell had happened? The last thing he remembered was...oh. He noticed now that his hands were tied behind his back, and the hard floor he laid on was moving. As he opened his eyes, he took in his surroundings with growing horror. He appeared to be in the back of a vehicle that was still driving. He swore to himself and pulled against his bonds, testing them - but they were tight, and he wasn't getting out anytime soon.
"Oh, sleeping beauty is awake." A voice came from the front, followed by a dark chuckle. "Hope you're comfortable."
"Uriel." Castiel breathed, closing his eyes as he realised the severity of his situation. "What have you done?"
"Oh, nothing yet, Castiel. But I assure you, I have big plans. Now why don't you relax? We've got a ways to go yet."
"Why are you doing this?" His heart rate was picking up, his breath coming faster. "You can stop this. Just leave me. I won't tell anyone."
"Oh, Castiel, what silly notions you have. You won't be telling anyone, not by the time I'm through with you. You won't be alive to say a word. But don't worry, we have plenty of time until then."
Oh god. He was going to die. He felt the anxiety clawing its way through his chest, his breath coming in uncontrollable gasps. He struggled, whimpering as the rope cut into his wrists, but he couldn't stop. The panic was taking over his mind, and he forgot everything - the situation, the pain, breathing - everything but the panic of knowing he was going to die. His chest was burning, his vision was blurring, and he didn't even consider taking a breath before he passed out again.