Don't worry. You haven't had a stroke. I am actually updating twice in one week.

Alright people. I need baby names. I have a few in mind, but nothing seems quite right. Ideas? And how old is Thomas when Tara dies? I've been looking everywhere and I can't find a bloody answer! Should he be walking and talking by now? They were always a bit vague in the show.

Thank you all for your kind messages and support. I'm almost certain that I will be posting my new SOA fic here. I've also just posted a chapter of a Grey's Anatomy story if anybody is into that show. Honestly. I'm shameless. Enjoy.

Jax can hear the baby's cry the moment the roar of his bike ceases. Thinking nothing of it, Jax pulls off his gloves and his helmet, a small smile twitching on his lips as he thinks of his daughter and the lungs that Tara claims she got from the Teller genes. He disagrees. From personal experience, he is confident that his daughter's shrill cries are definitely inherited from her mother. Tara hasn't been impressed when he reminded her of all the shouting matches they've gotten into, and how loud she can be in the bedroom.

She definitely wasn't impressed when he proved her wrong later that night.

The door is unlocked which makes Jax rolls his eyes. He's always having to tell Tara to lock the damn door, but she rarely remembers.

"Babe?" he calls out, his brow furrowing when he gets no answer. "Tara?" he calls out louder to be overheard by the baby's cries. His heart pounds in his chest when there's still no answer. He goes to the empty nursery and forces a smile to his face as he picks up his screeching daughter and cradles her against his chest and rocks her gently. "Hey baby girl," he says, relieved when her crying halts. "Where's your Mom?" The baby turns her face into his jacket and sniffles. Despite his worry, the smile he wears is real as he gazes down at his daughter. She is everything what he imagined her to be, and so much more.

With the kid settled, Jax heads to their bedroom, but there's still no sign of her. "Tara!" Jax shouts again. The baby fusses slightly, but she thankfully remains silent. "Abel? Thomas?" Jax calls, yet there's still no answer.

He checks the bathroom, the bedroom, the lounge and just as he's heading into the kitchen he finally finds her amongst broken plates and glass.

"Tara?" he cries brokenly, his mind unwilling to take in the scene before him.

There's so much blood.

Her eyes are shut and even from this distance he knows that she's not breathing.

"No, no no no," Jax breathes as he stumbles his way to her body. He tightens his hold on the baby as he slips on her blood but he manages to catch himself before he falls. With shaking hands he carefully lays the baby on a clean patch of floor and finally collapses next to his wife.

Tears are falling from his eyes as he wraps his arms around her and cradles her dead body to his chest. Jax's hands tremble as he caresses her face. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." A gut wrenching sob tears from his throat. It should have been him, not Tara. He presses a kiss to her still lips and it's so so wrong-

Jax wrenches his eyes open and manages to stifle a gasp. His heart is pounding in his chest as he reaches a hand out to his right until he feels Tara's sleeping body next to him. He turns towards her slowly and feels himself relax slightly as he sees her chest move with every breath.

She's alive.

She's safe.

Jax stares up at the ceiling and forces himself to breathe. He feels his body relax with every breath and the reminder that it's just a dream. She's alive. She's safe.

Knowing that sleep will not come, Jax gets up and heads for the kitchen and makes himself a coffee.

It's just a dream, he has to remind himself.

Sitting at the kitchen table, he ignores the tremor in his hand as he slowly drinks, his eyes transfixed on the floor on the exact spot where he dreamt of finding Tara's bloody body.

He has the same dream every fucking night and it's slowly driving him insane.

A hand touches the back of his head, startling him. "Isn't it a little early to be thinking so hard?" Tara asks softly. Jax hums and leans into her hand, almost purring like a cat thanks to the way she's running her fingers through his hair. He feels himself relax at her touch. Pulling out a chair for her, she sinks into it gracefully and shoots a longing look at his coffee.

"How long is it until the kid comes out again?" Tara wonders longingly, her eyes never leaving his mug.

Jax grins, "Still got a while yet babe." He drains the rest of his cup and sets it down. Tara groans dramatically and rests her head against his shoulder. He puts his arm around her and pulls her chair closer until she is pressed firmly against his side.

He gets a good look down her top - Jesus, her tits are huge.

"What are you up to today?" she asks, running her fingertips along the tattoos on his arm.

He should head to see Marks and deal with Barosky, but he can't deal with them today.

He looks at the kitchen floor for a moment. So many things have happened in his little house that he bought for himself and Wendy, back when he thought that maybe he could make himself love her and maybe forget about the woman who still haunted his dreams. If somebody had told him back then that he would be sitting in this small kitchen with Tara Knowles with a wedding ring on her finger and her belly swollen with their third child, he'd have thought them fucking mental.

But she's here. Alive and safe.

And his.

But damn if he doesn't want to get out of this goddamn house as quick as possible.

He resolutely turns away and smiles at her. "Let's go back to bed," he says, pressing his fingers against the soft skin of her thigh and trailing them higher as they slip under his shirt.

"There's too much to do," Tara replies, indicating to the half packed boxes currently occupying the house. They're moving in a week, and she's right, there is too much to do. Despite her words she spreads her legs, and Jax is not one to miss an opportunity so he presses his eager fingers to her panties and strokes her gently.

"I'll get the prospects to do it," he whispers. Tara shifts her hips, though with her ever growing belly she doesn't have much room to maneuver. Her panties are damp already, and fuck if it doesn't make his dick hard to see her so ready for him with so little effort on his part.

"Come on," he says huskily. "I'll make it worth your while." His dick is stirring in his pants and he's aching to be buried inside of her already. Tara shudders against him, her nails digging into his arm.

"What are you offering?" she whispers, brushing her lips against his. Her breath hitches as he presses harder against her clitoris. She moans softly and slowly rocks her hips against his hand.

"What do you want?" he counters.

Tara gives him a sultry smile and replies, "I think I want your mouth-"

Jax is kissing her before she can finish, eagerly swallowing up her words as he pulls her against him tightly and slips his hand inside of her panties-

"Ewww!"

Jax pulls away from her and looks down at Abel with a raised eyebrow. A smile twitches at his lips as Abel's face looks up at them in disgust and indignation.

"Mommy I'm hungry."

He tightens his hold on Tara but she's already pulling away and grabbing the box of cereal. Abel climbs up onto a chair looking mightily proud of himself.

The little shit.

"Thanks kid."

Abel looks at him seriously. "You shouldn't do that Daddy."

"Do what?"

"Kiss Mommy!" he whispers, shooting a fugitive look at his mother. Jax follows his gaze and sees Tara turning away from them as she shakes in silent laughter.

Confused, Jax scratches his head in bewilderment. He's way too tired to work this shit out. "Why bud?"

"Because she's a girl!" he hisses.

Oh.

Jax's lips curl into an involuntary smile. "Really? I hadn't noticed." He meets Tara's glare and smirks.

Abel nods seriously and leans forward as if he's about to reveal the secret to the end of the world. "Girls have cooties Daddy."

Jax rubs at his beard and does his best to stifle his laugh. Any anger he had over his interruption vanishes because his kid is just too fucking cute. "Listen bud. It's true. Girls have cooties. But guess what?" Jax leans in and whispers, "Mommies don't."

Abel's mouth drops open and looks at his mom as she places his bowl of cereal in front of him and places a kiss on his cheek. His eyes flick back to Jax who winks at him as he kisses Tara full on the mouth.

"Jax. Jax wake up!"

He groans and forces himself to open his eyes. Tara's standing over him, her face twisted into a worried frown. "Jesus. What's wrong-"

"We have no mint berry ice cream," she says, practically on the verge of tears. Jax raises an incredulous eyebrow and is seriously contemplating how much he loves her right now because he really, really needs to fucking sleep. It's been the first night in so fucking long that he hasn't had the dream, and he really doesn't need this shit right now.

"And you woke me up because..?"

Tara looks at him like he's a fucking moron. "Because you need to go get me some."

"Can't you just eat something else?"

"No!" she snaps. Jax raises an eyebrow at her tone, she tries again. "Baby, please," she says this time more gently. "I need mint berry ice cream. The baby needs mint berry ice cream. Please."

Jax rubs at his eyes and sits up to turn the light on. Tara frowns at him. "Fine. I'll go." She's already walking away as Jax shouts after her, "No you're fucking not!"

He forces himself out of bed and dresses quickly, half expecting to find her driving off already, but she's sitting on the couch with a small smile. "Thanks baby. I'll make it up to you."

Jax rolls his eyes and heads out, all the while wondering how she has him so wrapped around her little finger.

He's half asleep as he's coming out of the grocery store with the damn ice cream clutched in his hand when he hears a familiar voice shouting, "Jackie Boy!"

"Brother," he greets with a tired smile.

"Jesus Christ ye look like shite. Tara been keeping ye awake again?"

Jax shoots Chibs a hard look, but the older man only laughs. "Dinna get ye knickers in a twist man. I'm only jokin'. What's up with ye?"

"Shit man. I'm sorry. I'm just fucking tired." He pulls out his cigarettes and lights one. He relaxes as he takes his first drag. He ignores Chibs' penetrating stare and lets himself enjoy his first cigarette of the day. Being around the kids so much, he doesn't get to smoke half as much as he used to.

He flicks the stub away and lights another one. Chibs remains silent as he lights his own cigarette and waits patiently.

"I can't sleep," Jax says eventually, not looking at his VP. "I.. I keep dreaming that Tara's going to die."

Chibs rubs his chin awkwardly. "Jackie, nothin's gonna happen to Tara. She's a strong lass. I was the same way with Fiona when she was knocked up. I was a bloody mess. Tara's done the whole childbirth shite before-"

"No. This is different. I..I keep finding her dead body on my kitchen floor and it feels so fucking real. The baby's cry and the blood - there's always so much fucking blood. And the feeling when I realise that she's dead-" Jax inhales sharply and runs a hand through his hair.

Chibs is silent for a while, his eyes fixed upon Jax. "Ye know Jackie," he says, his Scottish brogue soothing Jax's worries for being a pussy worrying over a damn nightmare. "I know this isn't gonna be much comfort to ye, but it's only a dream. That ain't gonna happen."

"Look at what's already happened to her! She's been kidnapped, fuck she's gone to prison-"

"But she ain't gonna die."

"You don't know that," Jax snaps.

"No I don't. But I do know every one of yer brothers would die before lettin' anythin' like that happen to ye lass. She's protected."

Jax deflates, knowing that he's right. Even when he had been a teenager, the entire club knew how the prince felt about his girl. His brothers love him, and over time they have grown to love her. There's been far too many times his brothers have come to his family's rescue.

He trusts his brothers, all but one. There's a reason why Juice is kept far away from his family. He hasn't forgotten the fact that Juice betrayed him by revealing to Nero that Jax ordered him to kill Darvany. He betrayed the club that day.

Nor will he ever forget that the man is a rat.

"We ain't in any dodgy shit anymore, well, dangerous dodgy shit. Yer lass is safe," Chibs says softly. Jax let's out a breath and runs a hand over his face. His worries aren't gone, hell, he suspects that he's always going to be a nervous wreck when it comes to the safety of his family. But he feels a like a weight has been lifted from his shoulders.

"Thanks brother," he says quietly.

His cell rings making both men jump. Rolling his eyes at how impatient she is, he doesn't even bother looking at the called ID. "Yes babe?"

"Hurry up."

"Have a little patience-"

"I'll be saying that the next time you have a hard on and I'm trying to go to sleep. Hurry the fuck up."

She hangs up before he can even think of a reply. He runs a hand over his face. He's fucking exhausted. He puts his cell in his pocket and sees Chibs smirking from the corner of his eye. "Shut up."

"I didn't say nowt Jackie."

"You were going to."

"It's just a little ironic, innit?" Chibs chuckles. "Five years ago the only reason you would be out shopping at this time of night is to get some whiskey and some johnnies-"

"I swear to God Chibs-"

"But now ye buying yer pregnant wife - what was it again?"

Jax pauses. "Mint berry ice cream," he replies sheepishly. Chibs laughs in his ear and claps him on the shoulder.

A smirk plays on Jax's lips. "Wouldn't have it any other way brother."

She all but runs to him as soon as he's through the door. He smiles as she all but ignores him and snatches the ice cream out of his hands. If he were a braver man, he would laugh at her, but he values his life too much right now. These last few weeks, her mood swings are a little erratic.

And by a little, he means a whole fucking lot. One moment she's blissfully happy, the next she's a raging, screaming mess. She's making him a little nervous.

He follows her into the kitchen and watches in confusion as she grabs a spoon and heads for the cupboard and pulls out some ketchup.

Jax wrinkles his nose in disgust. "Babe," he groans as she squirts it all over her ice cream.

"Shut up," she snaps. "It's what the baby wants."

Unable to take her eyes off of her, he watches as she moans around her spoon as the ice cream hits her tongue. "Don't I even get a thank you?" he asks in amusement.

Tara doesn't even to bother to look at him, her attention focused firmly on the tub in front of her. She moans around her spoon and that's thanks enough. A smile twitches at his lips as he leaves her to it. "G'night babe," he calls over his shoulder. He strips and all but collapses into bed, and he's asleep the second his head hits the pillow.

It feels like he's only just closed his eyes when he feels her mouth on his neck and her nails gently scratching his chest. He's wondering if he can just feign sleep and hope that she leaves him alone when her hand travels lower. "Tara-"

"Shh."

His breath catches as her mouth sucks on his neck, marking him. He fists his hand in her hair, unsure if he's keeping her there or pulling her away. He opens his eyes to the glorious sight of his naked wife framed by the dim light coming from the lamp. "What are you doing?"

"I'm making it up to you. I want you so much," she breathes, wrapping a hand around his hardening cock and stroking him in a way that sends him crazy. Her teeth scrape against his throat, and damn his traitorous body because it's never been able to say no where Tara is concerned.

The thing is, lately, she always wants him. She's so goddamn horny all the time - not that he's complaining. Apart from those few weeks after her stint in prison, they have always had a very active sex life. But now he's half afraid that his erection is going to become a permanent thing because of the amount of time he's spent having one these past few weeks. The amount of sex that they're having was nothing but a fantasy when he was sixteen and she only let him have a little taste of what he desired more than anything in the world.

But he really needs to fucking sleep.

Tara's oblivious though as she bites the lobe of his ear as she gently cups his balls and whispers, "When I was pregnant with Thomas, I was so wet for you." Jax groans. She carries on pumping him slowly, her fist tightening on the base of his cock with every stroke. "I couldn't think about anything else. I rubbed myself raw thinking about your hands, I used every toy I could get my hands on, but nothing worked baby. I needed you." She squeezes his cock and gently swipes her thumb against his head.

Jesus Christ.

He can't help thrusting into her hand. The image is enough to explode right there, but what little self control he still possesses moves her hand away. "Where are these toys that you keep mentioning?" he demands tightly.

Tara's only reply is to smile wickedly. "Stand up."

"What?"

"Stand up. I want you in my mouth."

Fuck sleeping. He's wide awake now.

What little breath he has left leaves his body as he scrambles to his feet. With far too much grace for a woman seven months pregnant, Tara climbs off of the bed and kneels before him. It's a sight that has always excited him. There have been hundreds of women who have knelt before him to suck his dick, and yet seeing Tara, this strong, confident, beautiful woman, kneel before him. Well, it reminds him just how fucking lucky he is.

Tara looks up at him, and it's a sight that he won't ever forget. She wraps her hand around his cock once again and slowly licks the head of his cock. Jax clenches his teeth and hisses as she teases him with a few swipes of her tongue before wrapping her lips around his length and takes him into her mouth. His eyes flick between his cock in her mouth and the bounce of her tits with each movement. Jax fists Tara's hair as she trails her hands up his legs and firmly cups his ass. With a brief squeeze that has him smirking, she lets go and bobs her head faster and sucking harder. He's quickly losing what little control he had as he tongue swirls around his head with every movement.

"Tara," he groans, unable to help the thrusts of his hips as they meet her eager mouth, and he's just about done for as she takes him completely in her mouth.

The sensation is heavenly, and he's seconds from coming when she gives the head of his cock one final lick and releases him.

"What the fuck babe?!" he exclaims before he can stop himself. Tara raises an eyebrow at him, but after the show she put on how can she fucking blame him?

"Have a little patience baby," she quips, a sly smile on her lips. Jax rolls his eyes and is about to retort when she knelt up and brought her hands to her tits.

Holy fuck.

All thoughts fly out the window as he watches her run her thumbs over her nipples, a soft moan escaping her mouth. She bites down on her lip and looks up at him with hooded eyes as she brings her breasts up to his cock and presses them together, trapping his cock between them. She glides her breasts up and down his cock in encouragement. "You just going to stand there baby?"

"Fuck," he hisses, the sight of his head peaking out from between her tits. "Tara," he groans, rocking his hips gently, mindful of her belly.

"You don't think I haven't noticed your eyes glued to my tits for months?" Tara says softly. She thumbs her breasts again and pinches them gently. Her eyes are hooded as she dips her head and takes the tip of his cock into her mouth and sucks gently before releasing him. "I bet that you've wanted to do this for months."

Jax's eyes close in pleasure as his hips move quicker until he is fucking frantically between her breasts. He forces his eyes open, watching his cock disappear as her beautiful mounds bounced with every thrust. Tara whispers words of encouragement, her tongue darting out to lick the head of his cock until it's all just too much. Jax wrenches himself away from her. "Get on the bed," he growls, helping her up. "Lie on your side."

Tara's quick to comply, and he is even quicker as he presses up against her back. She turns her head and gives him a bruising kiss that soon has her moaning into his mouth as he lifts her leg with one hand and slips his hand between her legs with the other. His fingers glide over her slippery clitoris as he works her up.

Her hips are rocking against his hand when Tara pulls away from his kiss and whimpers, "Please Jax. Fuck me." His hand lifts her leg even higher, the other moving to cradle her belly as he slides his cock into her. He pumps into her with short erratic thrusts. He's not going to last long. "Touch yourself," he groans, his hips stuttering as he loses control Tara's hand slips between her thighs and rubs her pussy, her fingers brushing against his cock with every stroke. He clenches his teeth as he feels her clenching around his cock until she's sobbing in pleasure as she finally orgasms. Jax catches her mouth in a hard kiss to shut her up, and then he's coming, his whole body shaking as he carries on fucking her until he has nothing left to give.

He's pretty sure he blacks out, because the only thing he remembers before sleep claims him is Tara kissing him gently and softly saying, "Get some sleep baby."

It's the first decent nights sleep he's has in weeks.