Thank you again to everyone who is following and taking the time to review, I really love reading your thought and who you love or hate.

Okay, this one contains some reference to sexual assault and some violence.

Serena Benson had been a morbid woman. She had spoken of death often when she was alive, she'd talked about how she might die, about how she felt about dying, how others felt about dying, how different poets felt about death. Olivia had been more concerned with living. Of course, being a police officer, she had thought once or twice about what could happen, but she chose not to dwell on it for too long. When the fear of loneliness had reared its ugly head, on nights when she was alone after a particularly tough case, the thought of dying alone would drive her to drink, not excessively, just enough to reduce the dear, to take the edge off, but that so rarely happened anymore. It was only now, as Olivia was being frog marched, in handcuffs, through mud and trees, that she realised just how much she wasn't ready to die. Panic rose in her stomach as she realised that death was coming, and fast.

As she trudged, slowly, she thought of all the things she had yet to do. She had yet to marry, she had yet to experience what it would feel like to hold her own child in her arms. She had barely had the chance to do anything at all. She hadn't bungee jumped, not that she had ever particularly wanted to, but at that moment it felt a great shame that she would never get the chance to do it. Although she hadn't dwelled too much on death, there was one thing she had been certain of, she didn't want to die with regrets. That was something that wasn't going to happen. She regretted so much, nothing more than the fact that she was going to die like this, in what was sure to be a painful, brutal way, with Elliot by her side… Elliot. She regretted that Elliot was with her, that he was going to die, that his children would lose the man who loved them more than life itself. Olivia regretted the fact that just a few weeks ago Elliot had been in her bed, that after so many years of respecting his marriage, she had fallen at the last hurdle. She couldn't help but wonder if kissing her, and touching her was Elliot's biggest regret? No, she thought, it would much more likely be about his children, and his wife, and everything he was going to miss out on with them.

It seemed silly to be thinking about regrets now. Why now, when she had no way of changing anything? Why hadn't she thought about her regrets before this moment, faced up to them when she might have had a chance to make amends?

They had been walking for what seemed like hours, it had been ages since she had lost her footing and there were no signs that they were even close to their final destination. Olivia didn't know if she should have been relieved that death wasn't imminent, or if she wanted to just get it over with. She felt physically sick with fear when she thought about what they were going to do to her, and to Elliot.

Her heart began to race as Rogers held a hand up stopped. Olivia could hear the sound of water, a river or something nearby. Was this it? Was this where she was going to die? Elliot stepped towards her, his hands brushing against hers as he tried to comfort her. It both comforted her and scared her, he was scared, he thought that this was the moment as well. She gripped his fingers as he stood with her back against hers.

Her heart sank. Everything in her life, every child she had saved, every perp she and Elliot had stopped, it all came down to this moment. It seemed so unfair. This had all started with them trying to help innocent children. How could this be the end after everything they'd done? After all the good they had done?

"This way," Rogers grabbed Olivia by the arm and pulled her towards the river, ripping her away from the comfort of Elliot's touch. She panicked. She struggled against him as he pulled her towards the water. Her heart rate doubled, she wasn't ready to die.

"Stop your struggling, I'm not going to kill you…" he told her, with a menacing smile. "We haven't had any fun with you yet." Olivia stopped struggling, anger rose in the pit of her stomach as Rogers simply grinned.

"Why don't you just do it?" Her scream surprised them all, even herself. It was all a part of the torture, making them wait, prolonging the inevitable, they enjoyed watching them squirm, wondering if every stop would be their last. "Just do it!" she screamed, angrily throwing herself against the much larger man with all of her body strength. She had never felt so angry before, it came from almost nowhere. Rogers, obviously surprised by Olivia's sudden outburst, managed to stop himself from falling to the ground, just. He laughed, slowly turning his attention to the woman in front of him, her chest rising rapidly. He attacked without warning, wrapping his hand around her throat and slamming her against the nearest tree in a matter of moments.

As soon as Olivia had hit out Kieran was on Elliot, holding him back. He cried out as soon as Rogers reached for Olivia. Kieran punched him so hard in the gut that he fell to the ground, crippled in pain. "Liv…" he grunted, struggling to breath as the pain overwhelmed him. He wouldn't let them hurt her, he didn't care what happened to him but he wouldn't let them touch her.

Rogers squeezed his fingers so tightly against Olivia's throat that he was sure, in just second she would be dead. "You don't call the shots here Olivia, I do. You'll have your moment, but don't think for a second that it will be quick, or painless. I'm going to make you wish that you'd never been born." He spoke only loudly enough for her to hear, whispering in her ear, slowly. He released her with a shove, sending her crashing to the ground next to Elliot. He used his knees to push himself closer to her, still unable to speak, barely able to breathe as she too struggled to catch her breath. Neither one of them even attempted to get up, they simply sat shoulder to shoulder, finding slight comfort in the fact that they could feel the other's touch.

"Take off your clothes." The Rogers spoke slowly, no emotion in his voice. Both Elliot and Olivia looked at him, and then each other.

"What?" Olivia whispered, still able to feel where Rogers hands had been just second ago, squeezing the life out of her slowly. Her heart sank. It started here, the torture, the pain, all in front of Elliot. His grip on her hand became impossibly tighter, as he regained his composure, no longer winded Elliot pushed himself impossible closer to her. He wouldn't let it happen, he'd sooner die. He didn't dare to look up, he didn't think he could stand to look into the faces of the men who wanted nothing more than to get their hands on Olivia. Elliot couldn't stand having no control, not being able to do anything to protect Olivia.

"Are you deaf?" Kieran chimed in, Elliot could hear the joy in his voice. "Time for the clothes to come off," he laughed, roughly grabbing Olivia's arm and pulling her away from Elliot.

"No!"

Olivia stood, alone, her chest heaving, with Rogers and Kieran on other side of her. Rogers unlocked the handcuffs, she thought out hitting out, about running but she knew she wouldn't get far, and there was no way she would leave Elliot. He was staring at her, his eyes wide with fear, she could tell that he was desperately trying to think of a way out of this.

"Elliot, it's okay," she mumbled, willing her voice not to shake. She knew what they would happen if Elliot tired and fight this, and she couldn't bear to think of him being hurt. Feeling completely numb she turned to her friend, her partner. "It's okay," she repeated. They locked eyes, silently expressing fear, regret and pain with just a glance.

"We haven't got all night Olivia," before she knew what was happening Kieran was in front of her, pulling at her jacket until it was in a heap on the ground. She felt sick every single time that he touched her, sick and terrified. There was nothing that she could do, there was no way out, and worst of all Elliot was going to witness everything. She thought about begging, about pleading with him not to hurt her, not to do it in front of Elliot, but she knew that everything she asked him not to do, he would take great pleasure in doing, and that he would be happier knowing just how much she didn't want it to happen. So she stood exactly where she was, she didn't move and she didn't say a thing.

She thought about how fuious Rogers had been last time she had been in this situation when he had been unable to get a reaction out of her, so she would do the same again and hope that it was enough to get them to lose interest.

Olivia struggled to keep her footing as Kieran roughly pulled at her shirt, taking too much joy in stripping her clothes from her shaking body. She closed her eyes, unable to watch the look of sheer delight on Kierans' face.

"What do you think Elliot?" Rogers spoke slowly, watching as Kieran threw Olivia's blouse to the ground leaving her stood in only her bra and jeans. "I have to say, how you've worked so closely with her all this time, and you've never just taken her?" he asked, looking Elliot dead in the eye.

"She's not mine to take," Elliot spoke through gritted teeth, meeting Rogers stare.

"You know, Olivia, Elliot told me about what happened when you were undercover, I though you would have been a little bit wiser this time huh? To be in this position twice, it's just irresponsible of you, don't you think?" Rogers smiled as Olivia slowly opened her eyes, she looked completely defeated. For an instant she felt betrayed, hurt that Elliot would share something so personal with someone else, especially as he didn't know all of the details, he had never asked. Quickly, she realised that the mention of Sealview was simply a way to try to break the bond between Elliot and Olivia, she wouldn't let them succeed.

"You shut your mouth you son of a bitch!" Elliot realised what he had done as soon as he'd done it. Rogers swung, hitting Olivia in the jaw with such force that she hit the ground in less than seconds. The bastard had warned Elliot that every time he lost his temper Olivia would pay.

"What was that Elliot? What am I?" Rogers goaded him, willing him to say something else. "Not such a big man now are you? You're pathetic!" he spat. "What is she? What kind of a hold does she have over you? Tell me I'm a bastard, she can take a few more hits and it will make you feel so much better." It was like the man had lost his mind. When they were held captive before there was no sign of this side of Rogers, he had been nothing but composed at all times, something had changed.

Elliot concentrated on breathing, clenching his fists behind his back wishing he could have just a minute alone with both Rogers and Kieran. Olivia lay on the ground, still stunned by the huge blow. He could see that she was trying to regain her senses. Elliot would have given anything to have had his gun, or a knife or anything that would cause as much damage to the sick bastards as possible. He had never had an urge like this, the urge to hurt someone, the urge to kill and to take great pleasure in doing it.

"She needs to take her pants off," Kieran spoke slowly, his eyes fixed on Olivia as she lay on the ground.

"Take your pants off Olivia," Rogers called, leaning against the trunk of a tree, suddenly very calm. Olivia barely moved, still recovering from the almighty punch she had received, wondering if he had broken her jaw.

"Let me do it-"

"She can do it! Olivia take your pants off before I let Kieran do it for you!" Rogers yelled, marching towards her. Elliot noticed the exchange between Rogers and Kieran, who was now staring at his boss with hatred. Why wouldn't Rogers just let him do it? Why keep him away from her when she was at her most vulnerable? It didn't make sense, not that he wasn't relieved. His heart was still racing, he was still expecting them to attack at any moment but there was something holding them back, and for that he was grateful, but how long would it last?

"You," Rogers turned towards Elliot. "Clothes off."

EOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOEOE

Phil sat alone, in the darkest spot in the bar that he could find. He'd been given strict order by Captain Cragen to go home, despite arguing that he didn't need or want to. Cragen thought otherwise. Phil knew that he wouldn't be able to sleep, so here he was. He was exhausted, he wanted nothing more than to close his eyes just for a little while but he couldn't, not while Olivia and Elliot were still out there.

It had been two days since Elliot and Olivia had been abducted, and he had spent the first twenty four ours convinced that they had been murdered. Rogers was clever, finding exact body doubles, putting Olivia and Elliot's clothes on them and then setting fire to the bodies, that kept the team busy, wasting valuable time. Rogers probably used that time to get Elliot and Olivia as far away as he could. Phil shuddered when he imagined what might have been happening to Elliot and Olivia.

He couldn't help but feel guilty, had his cover not been blown none of this would ever have happened. Olivia and Elliot went through hell because he didn't realise that he was in danger, he didn't sense the signs. Anger bubbled in the pit of his stomach as he thought about Olivia, about all of the times she had sat with him, about the help she had offered him over the past four weeks. He should have checked that it was Rogers and Kieran that had been arrested, he should have double checked sooner. He didn't. Elliot and Olivia were gone, unlikely to return and it was his fault. He knew that Rogers wouldn't let them escape a second time, there was just no way.

Phil sighed, clinging to his glass, the smell of whiskey drifting towards his nostrils. He hadn't really had the chance to get to know Elliot, the man had disappeared for three weeks, possibly unable to deal with the strain, unable to face what had so nearly happened to him and his partner. Olivia was a different story. He remembered the night that Olivia found him curled in a ball, sweating and crying out in the crib, in the middle of yet another nightmare. She had gently woken him, offered him water and sat next to him on the bed, not pushing, simply placing her hand over his, waiting for him to speak.

He had cried that night, he had told her just how scared he had been. He confessed that he had been having non stop nightmares since being rescued, and admitted that he wasn't sure he would ever sleep again. He'd told her just how much of a coward he felt, having run away when Elliot had begged him to stay, Olivia have him a soft smile and gently squeezed his hand.

"You have nothing to feel guilty about, they tortured you."

He could still remember her soft tone. She had stayed with him for hours, comforting him, talking him through his pain, turning the conversation back to him when he tried to ask how she was. She very rarely spoke of herself, or sought comfort for what she had been though but she had been a pillar of strength for him. Slowly, the nightmares had stopped, they were replaced with dreams, of her.

Phil had thought about asking her out, about kissing her, holding her in his arms. He had been summoning up the courage when all hell broke loose, then suddenly she was gone. He wanted so desperately to save her, to find her and to bring her home but he couldn't help but wonder if she wasn't already dead. He shuddered, knowing that it wouldn't be slow or painless, they would make her suffer, they would try to make her beg… she never would, that much he knew. He felt so helpless.

He didn't want to be in a bar drowning his sorrows, he didn't want to be asleep. He wanted to be out there, trying to find Olivia and Elliot. They had followed every single lead they could think of. He'd wracked his brains to think of every single place he had ever heard Rogers mention.

Phil had always prided himself on his positive attitude, on the way that he didn't give up until he absolutely had no other choice. For the first time, in a very long time, he struggled to feel even a tiny bit hopeful. As much as he wanted to find Olivia and Elliot, he couldn't help but feel that Rogers was too clever, everything had been planned right down to the very last detail. They were lucky to escape once, Rogers wouldn't let it happen again.

"I thought I told you to go home?" Cragen appeared almost out of nowhere and sat across from Phil.

"Uh, I couldn't sleep. How did you know…"

"One of the detectives saw you, called me. I thought it might not be a good idea you here on your own," Cragen spoke slowly. Phil had been an asset to SVU and to the case, Cragen had become fond of him almost right away.

"Can I get you something to drink?" Phil asked, unaware of the older man's past issues with alcohol.

"Uh, you have no idea how much I want to say yes, but I'm okay," he gave a soft, forced smile. The two men sat in silence, simply staring at the glass of whiskey that Phil had yet to drink.

"You think they're already dead?" Phil asked, watching as Cragen closed his eyes and sighed. Phil knew how much the man cared for his officers, Donald Cragen had welcomed him with open arms.

"I… I can't think about that right now," he admitted.

"I've worked with Elliot and Olivia for…so long…"

"You care about them," Phil spoke, no question in his voice.

"When you work with someone for so long… They've made it out of tough situations before, I just… I'm just holding out hope," Don spoke slowly, his heart heavy. "I'm not going to give up, and you shouldn't either. They wouldn't for a second if it was us."

"You sent me home-" Phil started, only to be cut off.

"You need to sleep, you go and sleep and then you get your ass back to the station and you do everything that you can to find them," Cragen closed his eyes, he wanted to desperately to find Elliot and Olivia to know that they were safe, it physically pained him to imagine what they might have been going through at that very moment. The only comfort he could find was the in the fact that Olivia and Elliot were together, crazy as it sounded, he knew that they were stronger together, if there was any way that they could escape, together they would find it.

Elliot would protect Olivia and Olivia would protect Elliot, as much as they could. If anyone could get out of this mess it was Elliot and Olivia, he'd repeated that sentence to himself so often he'd almost begun to believe it.

"I was going to ask her to dinner…or something," Phil mumbled, unsure as to why he was confessing to the older man. "I…have feelings for her," he shook his head. "I was waiting for the right time, and she was seeing that guy, and I have no idea what's going on with her and Stabler-"

"They have a very complicated relationship," Cragen almost felt sorry for the man. He'd felt sorry for all men who tried to date Olivia, all men who got in the way of whatever it was that Olivia and Elliot had. He had never had the balls to ask Elliot and Olivia if they were sleeping together, but the tension came in waves. Sometimes he would chastise himself for ever having doubted them, other times he was almost convinced that something was going on. He knew that while Elliot was with his wife nothing would have happened, but there had been those few months in which everything seemed to change.

"Does she love him?" Phil asked, hoping that the answer was no, knowing otherwise.

"I really don't know. All that I do know is that I wouldn't want her to be out there with anyone else, if anyone can get out of this it's them two."

**

The waiting was unbearable. Elliot and Olivia had both been stripped down to their underwear, waiting for whatever horror was coming, only to be thrown new clothes and ordered to put them on. They had yet to be handcuffed again, instead they sat on the ground incredibly close to each other. As Rogers and his men, deep in conversation, stood meters away.

"You have to try to run," Olivia whispered, terrified that someone would hear her. She had been thinking about it for a while, she knew that she had no chance of escaping, she was the one that they wanted, but Elliot might make it. She knew that if she had tried to run she wouldn't have made it more than ten steps without one of them grabbing her. She also knew that if she ran in one direction and Elliot in the other, he would probably get away as the men would focus on her more than him.

Elliot shifted next to her, taking a few moments to think before replying slowly. "If we try tor run-"

"No," she interrupted, "not we, you." Elliot's jaw tensed, he didn't want to hear what she was about to say. Olivia knew it would be tough to convince him, but she was going to damn well try. "Think about it Elliot, they've said that they don't even want you here, you're just an added extra. If we both run in opposite directions-"

"No," Elliot spoke through gritted teeth, he knew exactly what would happen. "I'm not leaving you here, we're getting out of here together-"

"No, no we're not and you know it," Olivia tried to hide the fear in her voice. "You can get away Elliot, I know that you can-"

"Stop," Elliot whispered, the thought of leaving her was almost more than he could bear. "I'm not leaving you, there is no way in hell. You wouldn't leave me."

"If you asked me to-"

"Bullshit," he struggled to contain his anger. Olivia slowly reached for her partner's hand, her fingers intertwining with his. Elliot looked at her, unable to hide the pain that covered his face.

"I know… I know that you're scared. I can't… I can't watch you die…" tears filled her eyes. "Do you understand that?" she had never been so honest with him, she had nothing to lose. "I cannot watch them kill you, and that's what they're going to do. They're going to kill you to hurt me, I can't-" a single tear slipped down her cheek.

"And if I leave," he took a deep breath. "If I leave they're going to kill you. You think I can live without you? Knowing what they did-"

"Your kids-"

"Don't bring them into this," he begged, unable to even think about his children, unable the fight the sadness that thinking about them would bring.

"Who said you two could speak?" Before either Elliot or Olivia had the chance to react they were pulled up from the ground.

"No!" Elliot cried out as Kieran pulled Olivia away from him. Without warning, Rogers punched Elliot in the gut, followed closely by another.

"You don't fucking get it!" he punched Elliot in the face, hard. "You do what I say!"

"No!" Olivia screamed, watching as Rogers continued his assault. "No! Please!" she cried out as Elliot's knees buckled.

Olivia felt as though her chest was going to implode. Not now, she begged silently, please not now. She heard Elliot's grunt with each blow, unable to fight back. He was going to kill him, this was it, this was the moment she had been dreading. She fought against Kierans' grip, he laughed behind her.

Suddenly she was free, and Kieran was on the ground, she had landed a blow to his face with her elbow that he hadn't been expecting. She ran towards Rogers, desperate to stop him, desperate to help Elliot. She launched herself at Rogers, throwing him off of Elliot and onto the hard ground, she landed on top of him with a thud. In second he was on top of her, pinning her to the ground with just one hand, reaching for her throat with the other.

"You stupid bitch, you stupid, stupid bitch!" he screamed, tightening his grip on her throat. Olivia clawed at Rogers, struggling to breathe as he crushed her windpipe.
The last thing she saw as everything faded to black was Elliot, battered, bloody and still.