Chapter 9

Could he ever get enough of her? Jarrod didn't think so. They made love in the darkness of the mountains, the rocking of the train giving them those extra sensations they had come to adore, and Jarrod wondered how he was ever going to recreate them once they were off the train. "You may not be as eager to make love with me once we're in a bed that doesn't sway from side to side," he whispered as she sighed and he slipped down next to her.

"I doubt that," Beth said. "I don't think I could ever get enough of you."

Jarrod chuckled and pulled her close, feeling her head against his chest as he rolled onto his back. "I was just thinking the same thing about you."

"How many children do you want to have?" Beth asked.

"As many as God will allow," Jarrod said. "And I insist we name two of them after our stars."

Beth laughed. "Polaris and Dubhe?"

"Well, maybe middle names that no one need ever hear," Jarrod said.

Beth said, "Our first son must have your name – Jarrod Thomas."

"That's so conventional of you."

"A bit," Beth said, "but I can be conventional about some things. I'd rather not saddle our children with names like Polaris and Dubhe. I'd like them to have good, solid names. Names people wouldn't put question marks after when then pronounced them."

"All right, Jarrod Thomas for our first son. Elizabeth for our first daughter?"

"Yes, and your mother's name for a middle name. Victoria."

"I don't know. Sounds like too many queens of England, don't you think?"

"All right, my mother's name for her middle name – Pamela. Victoria can be our second daughter's first name, and my father's name for our second son."

"What was your father's name?"

"Stephen. And our third son – "

"No, now, let's not plan everything out," Jarrod said. "Let's leave some surprise."

"The surprise will be our second son's and daughter's middle names – Stephen Polaris and Victoria Dubhe!"

Beth burst into laughter and Jarrod followed right along.

XXXXXXX

They were crossing the Nevada desert when the sun came up. It wasn't as flat as Beth expected it to be. There were hills and mountains interspersed, but the sunrise still woke them up when it came in through the window. Jarrod still slept, snoring a bit. Beth listened and while she couldn't quite liken the sound to a cat purring this time, it did give her comfort and warmth. This was real. He was her husband. He was sleeping beside her.

Beth sat up, trying not to wake him. She put her robe on and slipped over to the window. She pulled a chair up there and watched the colors change across the desert and some mountains in the distance. She got lost in her dreams, about what it would be like once they reached Jarrod's home and family, what their life would be like once he got back to work and she was on her own (or would someone from his family be around most of the time?), what it would be like to carry his child and give birth and raise a little one who looked like both of them. Such sweet dreams of the future. Beth rested her hand on the window sill and then rested her chin on her hand, and she smiled.

Jarrod woke up and noticed she was gone, but he saw her right away at the window. He smiled, watching her. God, she was so beautiful in that early morning light, her face beaming as she watched the world climb out from under the covers. "Dreaming?" he asked quietly without sitting up.

She had been lost in thought, but his voice was so tender and quiet that she didn't jump. She looked his way, smiling, and she nodded. "And watching the sun come up. To think – " she said and looked back out the window, "I nearly stayed in Denver and missed this. Thank you, Jarrod."

"What are you thanking me for?" Jarrod asked.

"For this. For us. For everything. I've just been sitting here and marveling that all of a sudden I'm the luckiest woman in the world."

Jarrod laughed a little and then a yawn snuck up on him. "Oh, I'm sorry," he said as it eased off.

Beth came back to the bed, slipped her robe off and climbed back in beside him. Without a word, he snuggled into her and began to kiss her. Beth sank into the luxury of his kisses and his touch and would have said she was the luckiest woman in the world again, but words seemed superfluous right now.

XXXXXXX

They breakfasted in the dining car as the train began a long, slow climb up toward Reno and the mountains into California. They were comfortably quiet together this morning, Beth thinking about what it was going to be like to meet his family, Jarrod thinking about the same thing but also thinking about having to get back to work before too long. They didn't realize it at first, but they were each having their first worrisome thoughts about the reality after the fantasy, the practical life they were about to begin living together. Neither one of them was ready to let the other one know any unease was settling in.

But then, they didn't need to. They had already learned to read each other's eyes. Beth was the first to say, "You're worried about how we're going to settle in together, aren't you? Once we get to Stockton?"

Jarrod quickly shook his head. "No, I'm not worried. I am a little upset at the thought of having to go back to work and leaving you even for five minutes, much less five hours. I'd ask you to come with me, but you'd be so bored you'd probably leave me forever."

"No," Beth laughed. "I'll have plenty to do, once we begin actually living together. There's cleaning and laundry and cooking and sewing."

"Well, I hate to burst your bubble, but we have help that does all that."

"We won't have that forever. We'll be building our own home."

"And you may have all the help you want."

"I'm not sure I want any, at least not in the beginning. I think I want to make our home myself – plant the flowers, make the curtains, harvest the vegetables, sweep the floors – " By the time she said the last, she was beginning to laugh.

"Whatever you want, my darling," Jarrod said, "but as soon as you get tired of all that and would rather join the Women's League or help out at the orphanage with Audra, you let me know. And besides, we have to build our home first."

Beth nodded. She had been thinking about that, but she hadn't had any ideas gel yet.

Jarrod had. "I know just the spot for our home. I've actually thought about it for a long time."

Beth got caught up in his smile. "What's it going to be like? Where will it be?"

"Well, now, that you will have to wait for," Jarrod said. "I want to show it to you rather than describe it. It's a place I love more than I have words for, though I suspect you'll find the words when you see it."

Beth reached for his hand, and he took hers and kissed it. "I know it will be beautiful, but somehow I have the feeling that I don't have any concept yet of how beautiful. I think the beauty I'm going to see in California is something I don't have words for."

"Not yet perhaps," Jarrod said, "but you will."

XXXXXXX

When they returned to their car, Jarrod decided it was time for him to read to Beth, so he borrowed her book and picked up where she left off. But it wasn't long before he noticed she was nodding off against his shoulder. Poor darling, I've kept you up too much taking advantage of you, he thought and put the book aside. Then he began to dream, the way Beth had been dreaming, about the future.

He knew exactly where they would build their house. It was a place he'd loved since he was a little boy, a place of refuge and a place of poetry. That's where Beth belonged – in a place of poetry. He even had some idea of how their home would look, how Beth would look sweeping the floors. He chuckled a little at the vision she had given him. Beth sweeping floors. Beth doing laundry. Beth chasing Stephen Polaris and Victoria Dubhe around the house.

She thought she was the luckiest woman on earth. He thought he was the luckiest man. And he knew his family would come to adore her almost as fast as he had. They didn't know about the woman he fell in love with during the war, the woman he thought he'd be bringing home to marry but who turned out to be anything but what she seemed to be. No one had any idea how devastated he had been to find out the truth, to come to know that he had been wrong all along about her. No one knew how hard it had been for him to trust again, and to fall in love again, really in love.

But now it had happened. Jarrod put the book aside and rested his head against Beth's. This was real, and he wasn't wrong this time. Maybe what happened with Julia so long ago wasn't as bad as he had always thought it was. Maybe his shattered love with her, that kept him from falling in love again, led him to Beth, as sure as a straight line from Merak and Dubhe led to Polaris. Whatever it was, he had what he wanted, what he needed, right here in his arm right now.

And once they got home, they could begin to make that future they were both dreaming of a reality. Jarrod smiled and kissed Beth on the top of her head. He couldn't wait for the future to come.