Thank you to 2brown-eyes, ceceprincess1217, gabby1017, and DICATAKADD for pre-reading, and to SunflowerFran for editing. Any remaining mistakes are my own.
Song for this chapter, My Secret byThe Platters. I tried to add the YouTube link, but FFN isn't cooperating, so hopefully you can find it if you'd like to have a listen. Or, the link will be in my group!
Chapter 2
Bella
Walking into the Cullen's house is a bit strange. I've been here for dinner before, as a guest, but this is now my home. So, I'm seeing this place with new eyes. The younger kids all buzz past us and run like a herd of wild animals up the stairs.
"Alistair, Katie, Garrett, Riley! What have I told you about running in the house?" Mrs. Cullen sounds exasperated, trudging up the front steps, her hand at her lower back. "I'm sorry, Bella. It must be the sugar from the cake. They're not usually like this."
"Now, don't lie to her, Ma." Emmett walks up behind her, carrying one of my suitcases. "Those kids are always wild. Isn't it a sin to lie?" The twinkle in his eye tells me he's just giving his ma a hard time.
"As much as I'd love to stand around and discuss my brothers and sisters, it's late, and I'd like to take, I mean get, yeah, get my wife to bed." Edward's statement catches us all off guard. It isn't until I see Edward's grin and hear Emmett's laughter that I drop my head, trying to hide my scarlet face.
"Edward Anthony Cullen! I cannot believe you!" Emmett is still laughing, and I'm still trying to hide my face. I don't see, but hear her smack her son on the back of the head. "Go, get upstairs." Now she's practically pushing us up the stairs.
"What? She's tired. I just meant she needs her rest."
"I know full well what you meant, young man. Now go." She gives him another nudge, but lightly grabs my hand. "Bella? Could I speak to you for just a minute?"
"Sure." She waits for Edward to head upstairs before turning to me.
"Do you have any questions?" she asks quietly. "I know you two have been ... intimate." I can tell it's difficult for her to say. "But if you have any questions, please don't be afraid to ask me. You're my daughter now, so ..."
I can't stop myself from flinging my arms around her, hugging her tight. "Thank you." I'm overcome with emotion, so happy to have a mother figure in my life. "That means a lot." After a moment I release her, suddenly aware of what I just did, embarrassed bymy behavior. "I'm sorry Mrs. Cullen. I shouldn't have ..."
"Nonsense," she says, waving me off. "It was fine. Now, questions?"
"Um ..." My voice isn't much more than a whisper. "Is it safe to, you know ..." Wringing my hands, I can feel my face heat up again. I just can't bring myself to say the words, but I need to know.
"Is it safe for the baby for you to be with your husband?"
I blow out a breath, thankful that Mrs. Cullen isn't beating around the bush. "Yeah."
"It's perfectly safe. As long as you're comfortable, you can be together until the baby is born."
"Thank you, Mrs. Cullen." I'm hugging her again.
"None of this Mrs. Cullen business. You can call me Ma like the rest of the kids."
Pulling away, I smile at her, so happy to have found such a loving family to marry into.
"All right. Goodnight ... Ma." A smile graces both our faces, and she shoos me off to bed.
I make my way up the stairs, in search of my husband. Opening the last door in the hallway, I find him in what's now our room, unpacking one of my suitcases. It just happens to be the case with all of my unmentionables. He's holding up one of my stockings, just staring at it.
"Whatcha got there?" My voice startles him, and he drops the very thing that had him so captivated just a moment ago.
"How long were you standing there?" He's been caught red-handed, and I have to stifle my laugh.
"Long enough." Stepping toward him, I can see the guilt on his face. "Long enough to know that my husband was eyeing my underwear." His eyes quickly dart down to my skirt then back to my eyes, no doubt thinking of what he had an eyeful of earlier.
"I wouldn't go that far. I was just ... helping you. Yeah, helping put your things away." His self-satisfied nod makes me giggle, and shake my head as I walk over to him. He starts to laugh too. "No, you're right, I was checking out the goods. Now, come 'ere." I step into his open arms, and bury my face in his chest, feeling surrounded by him. For the first time in a very long time, I feel completely safe, loved, a sense of belonging.
"Have I told you how great your family is?" I look up into his emerald green eyes, seeing a smile on his face.
"Well, today made you part of it, so it's your family now, too."
He leans his head down to kiss me, which turns heated, quickly. His hands are roaming, and mine find their way to his buttons. His shirt follows his suspenders off his shoulders, both now hanging at his waist, only his undershirt clinging to his chest. His strong arms lift me, his hands trying to find their way under all the layers of my dress. I feel him brace himself, and before I can stop him, I'm flying out of his arms and onto the bed. He dives in the moment my bottom hits the mattress, but the sound of hundreds of bells brings us both up short. He ducks off the bed, and onto the floor, to see what the trouble is.
Hanging my head over the side, I see that someone has tied jingle bells to every spring under the bed. I pop my head up, making eye contact with my husband, and we both come to the same conclusion.
"Emmett."
He's on his feet in a flash, running out of the room, screaming that he's going to 'tear him apart,'which is funny, considering Edward doesn't have one aggressive bone in his body. I can hear Emmett's laughter through the walls, the stomping of their feet, as Edward chases his brother. I just giggle and shake my head at the ridiculousness of it all.
I manage to maneuver the mattress off the bedsprings and push it onto the floor, near the center of the room, away from the adjoining walls. Our room is right next to the one shared by Emmett and Alistair, and I know that if they hear anything tonight, we'll never hear the end of it.
When he finally makes his way back into the room, I've managed to divest myself of my dress, and I'm now wearing just my undergarments, standing in the middle of the dimly lit room. The look in his eyes makes me think he could devour me if such a thing were possible. The sight of him stalking toward me in just his undershirt and slacks makes me think I could devour him as well.
When he finally reaches me, few words are spoken, and it doesn't take long for us to become tangled up in each other. And this time, I have to agree with Rosalie, it definitely gets better.
The weeks pass, and we've all settled into a new routine. I help Mrs. Cullen with housework, cooking, and caring for the younger children. Edward has taken more shifts at the bowling alley, even doing some work for his uncle in the city, in Pittsburgh. He hasn't told me what kind of work it is, but he's brought home a little more money than he had been making, so it seems to be worth missing him a few evenings a week.
The trouble is, the more hours he puts in with his uncle, the less he smiles, and the less he laughs. His carefree personality doesn't make many appearances these days. Every time I bring it up, he just shrugs it off, saying he's tired. But I know it's more than that.
I've tried to visit him a few times at the bowling alley, but when a few nicely dressed men started showing up to talk to my husband on more than one occasion, Eddie told me it was probably best if I didn't come to see him at work anymore.
As I lay awake, unable to get comfortable because of my growing belly, I hear Eddie's Chevy pull into the driveway. We have the windows open, enjoying the fresh, late April air, so I can hear him cut the engine. The light of the moon shines on the bedside clock, showing it to be nearly three in the morning. It feels like an eternity before I hear the door of the car open and then close, but nothing else. The night is so quiet, I expect to hear, at the very least, the opening of the back door of the house. But I hear nothing.
Curious why he isn't coming inside, I slip out of bed, going to the window. Peeking through the curtains, I can see his silhouette in the moonlight. He's leaning against his car, his head hanging low. Even from this distance, I can see he has the weight of the world on his shoulders.
When he raises his head, I step back just a bit, not wanting him to know I was watching him, and sit back on our bed. When I hear the back door open and close, but not the sound of him coming upstairs, I pad to the door, listening closely. When I hear the squeaky door to the basement open and close, I quickly turn and grab my housecoat before leaving our room.
Stepping out into the hallway, I stop to make sure none of the others are awake. When I count to twenty and don't hear anything, I quietly make my way down the stairs, through the kitchen, and to the basement door. Gingerly making my way down the steps, I see the lone bulb in the corner of the room lighting up my husband's form. He's standing with his back to me, in just his boxer shorts, stuffing his clothes into a paper bag. With my heightened senses, I can smell hints of booze and perfume wafting through the air as he shakes the bag down. Thoughts of how those smells came to saturate his clothes make my stomach twist into a knot.
"Edward?" My whispered plea causes him to stand ramrod straight, tension radiating from him. "What are you doing?"
"Go back to bed, Bella." His easy dismissal brings tears to my eyes. I take a few steps closer, reaching out my hand, before dropping it to my side, thinking better of it.
"Where have you been?"
"Working." His one-word answer is said with some hesitation.
"Eddie, the bowling alley closed almost four hours ago. Where have you been?" I try to keep the shaky nervousness out of my voice.
"Uncle Tony had some more ... work for me in the city."
"What kind of work? And why do you smell like a distillery?" I step closer, reaching for him then, turning him toward me. When I get a good look at him, my hand covers my mouth, stifling a gasp, hoping I don't scream.
He's covered in blood. It's splattered and smeared on his face, his neck. His knuckles are bruised and bloodied as well.
"Oh my God! Are you hurt?" I step closer, my hands reaching out to check him for injuries, but before I can touch him, he grabs me gently by the wrists.
"I'm fine, Bella. It's not mine." Looking up at him, I can see tears in his eyes. His convulsive swallowing tells me he's trying to keep himself from letting them fall. "Can you, uh, just help me upstairs? I'd, uh, like to take a shower." He looks like a lost little boy, like he's counting on me to help him through whatever it is he's dealing with, what's going on inside him.
Looking into those eyes, I can see he's struggling to keep himself together, so I do the only thing I know to do; I take my husband's hand and lead him upstairs. Starting the shower and helping him remove his boxers, neither of us say a word. He steps in and just stands under the spray, unmoving. Seeing him like this brings a pain to my chest. My usually strong, happy boy looks like a shell of the man he was; as if something has stolen that part of him.
I take off my housecoat and remove my nightgown, and step in behind him. My five-month pregnant belly makes it a tight fit, but I manage to get my arms around his middle. I can feel him shaking in my arms, his silent sobs wracking his body.
"What happened, Eddie? Whose blood is this?" I ask in a pained whisper.
He shakes his head. "I can't." The head shaking increases, along with his breathing. "Oh, God, what have I done?" He pulls away from me, stumbling over the side of the bathtub, out of the shower, and to his knees, emptying the contents of his stomach into the toilet.
I'm struck dumb for a moment, all of it seems to happen in slow motion. When I finally come to my senses, I step out, kneeling next to him, rubbing what I hope are soothing circles on his back.
"Edward, you're scaring me. What happened?"
He's shaking his head again. "I can't. Bella, I can't tell you." When he looks up at me, his eyes are pleading, begging me to understand.
"Why not?" I ask quietly.
He closes his eyes, shaking his head. "I'm sorry, baby, I just can't." My clueless, teenaged brain can't process what all this could mean. My only real worry is for my husband, who's sitting naked on the bathroom floor, dripping wet, and looking broken.
"Okay, but we need to finish cleaning you up. Come on." I grasp his arm, helping him to stand, then nudge him back under the steaming water. He's listless, allowing me to wash him. It's breaking my heart, seeing him like this.
Stepping out, I help to dry him, then myself, before leading him back to our room. He falls unceremoniously into our bed, a vacant look on his face. Crawling in next to him, I curl into his side, wrapping an arm around him. Knowing I won't get a wink of sleep until at least one burning question is answered, I take a breath before asking.
"Eddie?"
"Hmm?"
"Can I ask you one question?"
"Hmm?"
"I know you said you can't tell me where you were tonight, but can you tell me if you were ... Were you with another girl? I mean, I could smell the perfume, and ..." He sits up, just enough to hover over me, his hand cupping my cheek before I can finish my questions.
"Bella, baby, no, I wasn't with nobody else. I promise." His eyes are frantically scanning mine, looking for my understanding.
"Then why did I smell perfume on your clothes?" My voice is timid, even to my own ears.
"I come home looking like ... that, and you wanna know why you smelled perfume?"
"Yeah." My eyes drop, unable to meet his gaze.
"Bella?" He puts his bent finger beneath my chin, urging me to look at him. "Bella, look at me." Unable to deny him anything, I do. "Baby, I wasn't with any girl. Well, not with, with one anyway. I was with Uncle Tony, and well, our meeting wasn't in an office, let's just say that. He had some ... company, and she tried to cozy up to me." I tense at his statement. "No, Bella, it wasn't like that. I ... I could never do that to you. You believe me, don't you?" His words come out in a rush, jumbled.
Looking into his eyes, though, I see what I hope is sincerity. Maybe it's just wishful thinking, but I want to believe him, so I nod. The relief on his face is instant. He exhales a large breath as his head falls to my chest, his arms once again wrapping around me.
"Thank God, baby. I don't know what I'd do if you didn't believe me. I need you so much right now. I don't know how I'd make it through this without you." His mumbled words into my chest and neck soon turn to heated kisses, and his hands begin to roam. Before I know it, we're joined together, my husband finding comfort in my body ... in us.
Just before I drift off to sleep, I hear his whispered words; words I'm sure I'm not meant to hear.
"I'm so sorry, baby. I didn't want this life, but it found me anyway."
The Boy
The first time Uncle Tony sent me out with Felix, one of his soldiers, it was easy enough. We made an appearance, threw around my uncle's name, and roughed up the poor schmuck who was behind on his protection payments. We were in and out in ten minutes, cash in our hands and adrenaline pumping through my veins. Felix was so impressed with me, he asked Tony if I could start running with him. We've been quite effective in getting people to pay up, too.
The money's a hell of a lot better than what I make at the bowling alley, so I can't complain. My cut of the first few shakedowns I did was almost a hundred bucks, so it's worth it. This way I know I'll be able to take care of my family. At this rate, we'll have enough to put down on a house in no time.
Uncle Tony said he wanted to use me for some bigger jobs, with bigger payouts. What I didn't expect was to be handed a baseball bat and ordered to make an example of someone ... to end him. Tony sent Felix and me out to 'take care' of the guy. The whole time, Felix tried to fill my head with all the sordid details about why this guy had to go, his sticky fingers dipping into Uncle Tony's profits and running his mouth behind Tony's back, but it didn't make it any easier to actually take that first swing.
I'll never forget watching the life fade from Sal's eyes while Felix cackled behind me, or the three times he had to pull off the road so I could heave into the gutter on our way home from dumping him in the Monongahela. He said it gets easier, that soon it'll be like second nature.
God help me if it ever is.
So, the bells under the bed actually happened to my grandparents when my pregnant 16 y/o grandmother and 19 y/o grandfather spent their wedding night in his family home, younger siblings harassing them and all. ;) They were married for over 50 years.
Thanks for reading and for all the love you guys gave to the first chapter! It blows me away to have so much support. I was an epic fail at review replies last chapter, which isn't a good way to start off, and I apologize. I'll try to do better!
Pic teasers and song links in my Facebook group, Sunshine Fics. :) See you Thursday!