"So what the fuck just happened?"
Luffy and Zoro shared a long look before shaking their heads. Zoro murmured, "Doesn't matter anymore."
Luffy added, "I don't like hurting regular humans…"
"I'm pretty sure there's a dent in my skull," Usopp snapped, rubbing his blood-encrusted head, "and ya'll were doing what? Inquiring minds would like to know…"
"No offense," Nami interrupted, "but I'd like to get out of here. Is that on the schedule for today?"
"Wait a minute, ma'am, uh," Usopp said, smiling at her apologetically, "there's a mystery I need solved. I was, uh, clubbed upside the head and knocked unconscious, so I don't know how valiantly these two fought and I would, uh, like to know how it all went down…"
"Oh, we fought valiantly," Luffy answered.
Zoro nodded in agreement, "Very valiantly."
"I'm walking." Nami called out, her bare feet slapping against the cement. "Bye."
"Sure," Zoro muttered, adjusting his pack, "Come on, Luffy."
"I'm coming," Luffy replied, bobbing from one foot to the other as he took off his shoes. He ran ahead of Zoro and Usopp, handing Nami his shoes, "Wear these."
"I can't take your shoes," Nami refused, shaking her head.
"Sure you can," Luffy insisted, shoving them forward, "we're probably pretty close to the same size. Plus, we only have two blocks to walk…"
"Two blocks?" Nami questioned, taking the shoes and slipping them on. "Where're you headed?"
Luffy held his finger up to his mouth in gesture and then he began running. He ran down the street, far ahead of the others. He skidded to a stop two blocks down and began to hop up and down in excitement, "We're here! We're here! I can see it!"
"Is he serious?" Nami asked, turning toward Zoro.
Zoro shrugged, "He's excitable."
"Excitable?" Nami asked, shaking her head.
"You'll see, ma'am," Usopp said, smiling despite himself. "That's just the best way to put it, he's excitable."
"Where're you from?" Nami asked Usopp, laughing softly, "Your accent is strong."
"Why, ma'am," Usopp drawled dramatically, "I'm from Georgia."
Nami groaned, a smile curving up the corners of her mouth, "It's ridiculous, don't be proud."
"Hey!" Usopp protested, drawing himself up to his full height, "Pardon me, but…"
"Hurry up," Luffy whined loudly, "knees to chest…"
They walked casually through the intersections until they came to stand beside Luffy. "What?" Nami shook her head in surprise, "this is where you wanted to go?"
"I've never been to one," Luffy admitted, "it's now or never."
Nami's face twisted sympathetically, "Hey, Luffy, I don't know if this is a good idea…"
"Why not?" Luffy asked, easily scaling up the zoo entrance.
"Luffy," she called out, shaking her head sadly, "it's been almost two weeks since the event… I don't think…" she trailed off as Luffy forced open the padlock.
"What're you worried about?" Luffy asked, closing the gate once the others had stepped inside.
Usopp caught on, he made a terrified face before whispering to Zoro, "If no one's been feeding the animals…"
"Hands up, motherfuckers!" a man shouted, seemingly coming from nowhere to aim a rifle in Luffy's face.
"Luffy!" Zoro shouted, pulling his sword.
"Whoa, whoa!" Usopp yelled, his rifle trained on the large, imposing man.
"I'll shoot," the man threatened, placing the barrel of the gun against Luffy's cheek. He shook his head and whistled low, "That's a hell of a gun you've got, brother. Tell me. Why are you here?"
"I just wanted to see the animals," Luffy breathed out, reaching up to place his hand on the rifle. He slowly shoved it out of his face and the man let it rest on his chest.
"Yeah? What for?" the man pressed, looking at the others dubiously. His demeanor changed when he saw Nami. He rolled his shoulders back, an offended look in his eye, "You okay there, girlie? Need some help?"
"Eh," Nami sighed, "These guys are cool enough."
"Don't shoot me. I got shot earlier and it fucking hurts," Luffy complained, rubbing his thigh.
"It's just a tranquilizer gun anyway," the man sighed. "Holy shit, bro!" the man gasped, finally looking Luffy up and down, "You shoulda said you were in need of medical attention…"
"I'm not," Luffy said simply. "I just wanna see the animals."
"If you think this is some sort of exotic game buffet," a woman declared, stepping out from behind the welcome sign, "then you should just leave." She walked forward, her long, black hair swishing behind her, "I will destroy anyone who threatens the animals in this zoo."
"Oh thank God," Nami breathed out, "so glad there's another lady."
"Who are you people?" the woman asked, her eyes narrowed suspiciously.
The man shrugged, smiling at her apologetically, "Visitors, babe."
"Heavily armed visitors." The woman amended.
"We're not here to cause trouble," Zoro said calmly, "but we will be keeping our weapons. The last people we ran into left a bad taste in our mouth."
"Is it just the two of you, ma'am?" Usopp asked, looking around the peaceful zoo in disbelief.
The man and woman exchanged a look. It was becoming a familiar look, easy to recognize. It was the look of someone who didn't know who to trust.
"My name is Luffy," Luffy said simply. "Zoro and I have been together from the beginning. Wave, Zoro. The three of us- wave, Usopp- have been together for a week. We just met Nami."
"I'm Nami." Nami said with a smile.
"I'm Franky and this…," the man hitched his thumb toward the woman, "is Robin."
Robin seemed to consider it a moment longer before she added a curt, "Hello."
"Any zombies here?" Luffy asked, using his hand to shield his eyes from the sun.
"Zombies?" Franky questioned, looking to Robin.
"The crazy people who eat people." Zoro explained.
"Oh, uh, well," Franky stammered unsurely, meeting Robin's gaze.
"Is that a yes?" Usopp asked.
Franky shrugged, "It's complicated, brother."
"How's it complicated?" Zoro questioned coolly.
"If it's the animals you want to see," Robin announced, "there are only three hours of daylight left."
"We have permission?" Luffy asked.
Robin nodded, her hands flitting anxiously, "As long as you understand the animals are not to be harmed, then yes."
"Alright then," Luffy grumbled, looking around at the others uncertainly, "ready?"
"Uh, ma'am, there's not like a zombie grizzly bear or anything, right?" Usopp asked, leaning in close to speak to Robin.
"No," Robin began to answer, a smile finally tugging at her lips, "So far-"
"Animals are immune." Luffy answered firmly, chewing on his nails.
Robin arched a brow with interest, she turned to face Luffy, "What do you mean?"
"Well, beside humans, animals can't get infected," Luffy replied, grabbing a visitor's map from the stand. He turned and smiled, oblivious to how intently everyone was listening to him. "If the monkeys can't catch it, none of the others will."
"I ask again," Robin murmured curiously, "what do you mean?"
"Come on, Luffy," Zoro instructed, throwing his arm over Luffy's shoulder. "Let's go see some skunks… Think they have skunks?"
"They ain't got no skunks in the zoo!" Usopp shouted, chasing after them. He paused suddenly, flashing Nami a smile, "You comin', ma'am?"
"One more ma'am from you and I'll turn you into skunk food." Nami declared, walking past Usopp with a swanky gate. She spun in a circle, flashing him a smile, "Come on now. I'm not walking alone. I don't even have a weapon."
"Want me to follow them?" Franky offered, hitching his thumb at Luffy's group.
Robin nodded as she patted the tranquilizer gun in Franky's arms, "Yes. I do." She seemed to pause for thought before adding, "And take the skinny one to the Doc when you come to him."
"Sure thing," Franky replied, smiling handsomely. "Anything for you."
"Run along." Robin said, smiling despite herself.
They were somewhere between the exotic birds and small American mammals when Franky gave in to their pestering. Luffy wouldn't concede. He battered the large man incessantly until he answered his questions, "So you're a zookeeper?"
"No. I'm not a damn zookeeper." Franky finally admitted, leaning against the wooden railing. "I'm a mechanic."
"That's respectable," Zoro murmured.
"Like a zoo mechanic?" Luffy asked, unsurely.
"No, like a large and small motors mechanic, like vroom vroom," Franky replied, making a revving motion with his hands.
"Then why are you here?" Luffy questioned, climbing over the fencing to get a better look at the bald eagle.
"Hey, get back over here," Franky chastised.
"Why?" Luffy looked at Franky with wide eyes. "If you don't work here you can't tell me what to do…"
"Luffy!" Nami scolded, yanking him back over the fence by his hoodie. "Follow directions."
"Thank you, girlie," Franky sighed. He focused on Luffy, a scowl furrowing his brows, "Look here, I may not be a zoo mechanic, whatever the hell that is, but I am defacto second in command here. So you will follow Robin's rules or we will both get in trouble…"
"Okay," Luffy agreed easily, as if he hadn't been giving Franky any trouble a moment ago. He grinned as an idea came to him, "Can I ride an elephant?"
"Absolutely not." Franky barked, gesturing with his hands.
"So," Luffy continued, back on track, "what's a mechanic doing guarding a zoo?"
"Mila the Macaque was having her baby," Franky said, sighing as if he had a terrible thing to get off his chest. "She lost the one she had two years ago. So it's sorta a big deal…" Franky sat down on the fence rail. "So Robin called and said she'd be staying until the baby was here," Franky shrugged, "no biggie."
"You and Robin, then?" Nami asked, trying not to seem too surprised.
Franky nodded while continuing his story, "I was at work when one of my buddies turned. One second he's working on a timing belt and the next he's tearing through another bro's throat. It was… it was crazy…"
"Was he bitten?" Zoro asked.
"Nah, brother," Franky shook his head slowly, "we were at ground zero."
"What do you mean?" Zoro pressed.
"Whatever they dropped," Franky said, his voice barely above a whisper. "It's just fucking luck I had my welding mask on."
"Something was dropped?" Zoro turned toward Usopp, a look of irritation etched across his face.
"What? I didn't know either! Don't give me that look…" Usopp snapped.
"That's not important," Luffy groaned, waving his hand dismissively, "What about Mila?"
"Pandora was born 12 days ago," Franky answered, smiling proudly as if it were his own child. "Normally they aren't named for months, but, well, we're all just doin' what we want right now."
"How many people are here?" Zoro asked.
"Thirty-five."
"And how many zombies?" Zoro pressed on.
"Now, brother, I already said that's a bit complicated…"
"Usopp's smart," Zoro replied coolly, "he can follow…"
"Wow," Usopp sighed, "have a little more confidence in yourself there, Zoro."
"I wanna see the baby monkey," Luffy said, dropping his bottom lip forward into a pout.
"That's a hard pass," Franky refused instantly, "that baby is the most important living thing on Earth to Robin. Ain't no way she's gonna let you see her."
"How long until ya'll run outta animal food?" Luffy asked, a devilish expression crossing his face.
"Mind ya business!" Franky snapped, slapping his hand gently across Luffy's shoulder.
"I bet gorillas and elephants eat a lot of fucking green a day…" Luffy murmured.
Franky frowned, "Yeah? And?"
"And there won't be any deliveries, perhaps never again," Luffy replied.
"Your point?" Franky snapped.
"If you hurry you can dig up all these flowers and useless shrubs and plant food," Luffy pointed out.
"Yeah, but we don't have any seeds or bulbs and I don't know about you but-"
"What are you saying?" Robin asked, unexpectedly stepping onto the paved path.
"You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours." Luffy declared.
"What can you give me that I need?" Robin questioned, humored.
"You let me see that newborn baby monkey and I will bring you every single edible plant in a thirty mile radius." Luffy proposed, absolutely serious.
"What?!" Zoro snapped, looking at Luffy in shock. "What're you talking about?"
"I wouldn't have time to plant and cultivate seeds," Robin answered, "before the animals starve."
"I'll bring as much food as I can," Luffy breathed, "but about meat, I can't really help there…"
"Don't worry about the meat," Robin said, a smile tugging across her lips. "I've got that covered for now."
Luffy smiled too, the realization hitting him. "You're crazy lady. I love it."
"It's no walk in the park out there," Robin warned, gesturing to outside the zoo. "You could die or fail or both…"
"Don't worry about me," Luffy said simply, "you just make sure that macaque is here when I get back."
"He's crazy," Nami murmured, watching the exchange in shock. "He can't really expect to go out there and get food enough for a fucking zoo…"
"He does." Usopp said, nodding.
"Yep." Zoro agreed, lowering his head.
"Start digging this shit up," Luffy instructed Franky, thinking nothing of ordering him around. "You're gonna need a big garden."
"It's been two weeks," Usopp groaned, following behind Luffy. "The groceries will have been completely looted and the produce will be rotting and…"
"And you've been shot!" Nami cried out. "Oh, God. He's probably delirious from blood loss."
"I see your point, but he's always like this, ma'am," Usopp explained with a grimace.
"Enough with the 'ma'am'," Nami barked, pinching Usopp's side. "I'm 20 not 40."
"It's never too early to be polite," Robin interjected, her smile tight.
"Can you just let him see the monkey?" Zoro asked, turning toward Robin. "So he doesn't go on some suicide mission?"
"I was only teasing him a bit," Robin replied with a smile. "Come now, Luffy," Robin called out, "if you wash your hands well I'll let you see Pandora."
"Yes!" Luffy cheered.
"So, where's the rest of your unit?" Franky asked, slowing down to walk alongside Usopp.
"I was dropped with a team of four," Usopp answered, "One immediately needed evac and the other two went, uh, are currently missing." Usopp made an involuntary face and he started chewing on his lip to balance it out. "And so far, the rest of my unit, it's been radio silence."
"Ah," Franky nodded. "That's rough."
"How'd you make it out? If you don't mind me asking," Usopp asked. "Ground zero was totally fucked. Only people I've heard about getting out were Luffy and Zoro."
Franky looked at Luffy and Zoro hard for a moment before saying, "I did some things I regret to some people who weren't themselves. And then I got in the car because if I was gonna die, I was gonna see my wife one more time."
"Awww," Nami cooed. "You're married?"
"Not yet," Robin replied, wriggling her bare finger. "Someone dragged his feet so long the literal end of the world happened first…"
"That's super mean," Franky groaned, "you know I was saving up for the ring."
"Hardly matters now." Robin said.
"Well, ma'am," Usopp interjected, "I'm an ordained minister." He gestured from Franky to Robin, "I can fix this."
"What? Really?" Franky shook his head in disbelief.
"Oh, what a turn of events," Robin teased, "Now what will you come up with, Franky?"
"Ain't nothing stopping us now. I can just waltz right into 'Zale's'…" Franky teased back, "My brother can't come. You're wearing a souvenir shirt. There's no beer. I see no problems with any of this."
"Are you really an ordained minister?" Nami asked, eyeing Usopp.
Usopp nodded, "Yes, ma'am. It cost me $25 on the internet and it looked amazing on my entrance applications."
"Have you actually married anyone?" Nami questioned, pinching Usopp's side again.
"Ouch!" Usopp complained. "Yeah, I've married five couples." Usopp paused, adding quickly, "And I don't discrimate or nothing. I did traditional weddings because that's who asked, but I can do any kind of wedding."
"Who are you talking to?" Zoro demanded, cutting his eyes.
"Look, Franky," Robin murmured, lacing her fingers through his. "It isn't too late after all."
Franky twisted her around, dipping her low in his arms. He leaned over her, kissing her passionately. His muscled arms wrapped around her thin frame and she smiled into the kiss. Finally, he broke away for air. He murmured sweetly against her chest, "All I want is to be your husband…"
"Oh my God!" Nami squealed, slapping at Usopp in excitement. "He is sooo romantic! He is so sweet!"
Robin stood up, fixing her hair. She flashed Nami a smile before sighing, "Oh, he has his moments. But don't be fooled. All boys are crusty, nasty boys."
"Are they married now?" Luffy asked, clapping his hands uncertainly.
"No, not yet," Zoro clarified, folding his arms over his chest. "There's a whole speech thing they have to do and stuff."
Luffy stopped clapping, "Can I see the monkey before you get married?"
"We're not getting married at this exact moment," Robin said, smiling indulgently. "There's a lot of work to do."
"If you help," Franky rumbled, "it'll be monkey time even sooner."
"Wha'd'ya need help with?" Luffy drawled.
"Feeding and watering the animals and cleaning habitats," Robin explained. "It's a tough job for thirty some people."
"Sure, we'll help. I'd love to help." Luffy chattered excitedly.
"Usopp, Nami," Robin called out.
"Yes, ma'am?"
"You two come with me," Robin instructed, "Franky, you take Luffy and Zoro with you. Drop Luffy off at the doc first."
"I don't need to," Luffy insisted.
Robin smiled at Luffy sadly, "You're bleeding all over my zoo, dear."
It was a short golf cart ride to the medical office. "Hey, Doc," Franky announced, "Got you a patient."
"Oh," the older man sighed, looking Luffy up and down. "I usually only treat patients with tails…" He extended his hand toward Luffy, "I'm Doctor Crocus."
"Luffy," Luffy said in greeting, taking Crocus's hand.
"Zoro," Zoro murmured, shaking his hand next.
"What do we have here?" Crocus asked, patting the large examination table in gesture.
"I don't need anything," Luffy maintained, looking in the jars on the counter.
"Take a seat," Crocus instructed, "And you'll get a treat." Luffy sat down, confused to why everyone in the room was laughing. "Well, I guess tails or no tails, it's all the same," Crocus laughed in amusement before sobering up, "I'm going to need you to remove your jacket and your jeans."
Franky turned around in an effort to give privacy. Zoro lowered his eyes to the floor. Luffy groaned before undressing down to his underwear and socks, "I'm not wearing a shirt so I'm just kinda… naked-ish now…"
Zoro looked up, too curious to be polite. He focused on the place where he knew the bite had been. The skin was a bluish green but unbroken. Zoro sighed in relief, tapping his fingers against his legs anxiously.
"What happened?" Crocus asked, pressing with a tongue depressor against the ugly, bleeding wound on Luffy's thigh.
"I got shot." Luffy murmured, scratching his head.
"How long ago?" Crocus asked, quickly pulling on gloves.
"An hour. Maybe." Luffy replied, shrugging.
"We're gonna need to get the bullet out," Crocus muttered, leaning over Luffy's leg, deep in thought. He pressed the sides gently. "And do some X-Rays."
"No thanks," Luffy refused.
Franky turned back around, "Look, brother, Crocus is the best veterinarian we have. The apocalypse ain't the time to get picky. A doctor is a doctor…"
"Oh, please don't take it personal," Luffy clarified with a grin, "if he were a people doctor I wouldn't even be sitting here. I don't mind you, Crocus. I don't. I just don't want any X-Rays. And the bullet's fine. It'll come out on its own."
Crocus smiled sympathetically, "No, kid. The bullet won't just come out on its own. You're risking infection and amputation, and worst case, death."
"You should listen to them," Zoro said, meeting Luffy's gaze. "Who knows the next time we'll run into a doctor. Of any kind."
"Ugh, Zoro," Luffy complained, "Don't gang up on me. Lame."
Crocus laughed, "Don't take it personal either. But it would be a shame for me to let an otherwise perfectly healthy young man die from stubbornness."
"If you take the bullet out, I won't need X-Rays right?" Luffy questioned.
"Well, we should really do the X-Rays to make sure the bone hasn't splintered and that all of the bullet comes out…" Crocus explained patiently.
Luffy scratched his head, his nails forcefully scraping against his scalp and through his hair. Zoro thought he might rip his own ear off until Crocus grabbed Luffy's hand. He held Luffy's hand in his own tightly before saying, "No X-Rays."
"No X-rays." Luffy agreed, letting Crocus place his hand on the table.
"Now, as for removing the bullet," Crocus said, scooting around on his rolling chair. He started gathering supplies, handing them to Franky who placed them on a tray. "I think it's best if we use chemical cauterization, do you know what that means?"
There was a strange tinkling sound. Zoro opened his eyes just in time to see it himself, the bullet bouncing off the examination table and onto the tiled floor. The bullet seemed to dance, ringing like a bell, against the ground before it stilled. Several droplets of blood rolled off of it, pooling beneath the metal.
Zoro, Franky, and Crocus slowly lifted their gaze. Luffy was still on the examination table, his hands at his side. Blood leaked from the wound, running down his thigh and calf. A moment later Zoro realized that Luffy's right hand was covered with blood.
Crocus dropped the tool he was holding, "What the hell did you do?"
"I told you it wasn't a big deal," Luffy murmured. "But I do need it to stop bleeding," Luffy gestured to the jars on the counter, "Can I have a band-aid?"