I Could Have Stopped It

(Day 4: Wednesday Evening)

"Wow," Carlos comments. "You look super mad."

"Yeah, well," Mal reaches for her milk. "I just came from Fairy Godmother's office."

"What did she say?" Jay questions.

"Oh, nothing," Mal sweetly sounds with a high pitch. "She only accused our parents of abusing us all and implied that we're all just helpless victims."

Jay and Carlos give each other a look, before Jay comments, "They kind of do abuse us, Mal. All of the threats and everything… It may seem normal to us, but no one does it here."

"And that's exactly why they wouldn't know what real abuse is," Mal asserts.

Carlos shakes his head, "Do you not remember that time Jay came to us with a blade hanging out of his shoulder?"

Mal stresses a smile, "So, his father got a little upset. All of our parents do. It's just because they've been trapped on that island. It doesn't make them abusers."

"Carlos's mother burns him," Jay refutes. "Regularly."

Evie covers her mouth as she responds, "Oh, God. Carlos." and all Mal can do is stare at him in disbelief.

Carlos glares at Jay, "I can't believe you told them."

Mal sadly stares at Carlos, "I can't believe you didn't tell us. I thought we were supposed to be friends. Why didn't you come to us?"

"Because it's not that bad," Carlos looks around before meeting her eyes. "Look. I'm used to it."

"You shouldn't have to be," Mal insists. "Why does she even do it?"

Carlos looks down at his tray, "I don't know. I think sometimes she does it as punishment for, you know, when I don't do my chores. Other times… I really don't know guys. It might just be because I'm there."

"See," Jay tells Mal. "Our parents hurt us. Admit it. What they do, it's abuse."

Mal shakes her head and laughs, "No. Just no. I'm not a victim."

"Mal," Carlos comments. "None of us like these terms they use, but even I have to admit that by definition that's what it is. It doesn't matter how we feel about it. It's happening."

"No. No," Mal insists. "I'm not a victim. I'm just not. Not to my mother. Not to Hook. No one. You hear me?"

"Wait," Carlos gestures with a hand. "What does Harry Hook have to do with this?"

Evie frowns, "Mal. What did he do to you?"

She nervously laughs, "I told you before E, he didn't do anything."

"You never told me any such thing," she replies back.

"Well. I'm telling you now. Nothing happened."

"No," Carlos disbelieves. "You brought him up. He had to have done something."

"No. He didn't," she insists.

"Mal," Evie begins.

Mal cuts her off, "He was just mean. Okay?"

Jay furrows his eyebrows in speculation, "Did he hit you? I swear, if he did—"

"No," Mal interrupts. "He never did anything like that. I just didn't like him. Okay?"

"Mal," Evie sadly says as she reaches for her hand, but Mal pulls away before she can.

Mal merely responds, "I have to go." before she stands from the table and leaves.

As they watch her leave, Carlos asks, "What do you think happened?"

"I don't know," Jay answers. "She never told me the full story. It always just seemed like some book that had pages missing."

"Ones that she's unwilling to give to us," Evie adds on as she lays her head in her hand. "Upside is, Carlos, I got you a brownie, and Jay. You can have the spaghetti." She watches as the two of them give each other a look. "What? What is it?"

Carlos comments, "You scared us today."

"I couldn't even speak or move," Jay admits. "What happened—"

"It's fine," Evie interrupts. "I'm fine."

"Maybe you are. Maybe you aren't," Jay softly responds. "But what happened did scare us. Just the idea that that could have happened and that we were encouraging you…"

"You weren't encouraging anything," Evie replies in sureness. "You just took props. If it weren't for you, then they'd be in the trash right now. Is that really what you want, to know that while five-year-olds are starving on the Isle the food you could have taken from me just ends up in the trash here?"

"We're not going to enable you anymore," Carlos sternly responds.

Jay sees her disbelief, "You don't have any idea how horrible we felt when we saw what had happened to you. We're lucky you only fainted. If it had been worse, if you had died…"

"We don't know how we could've lived with ourselves," Carlos finishes.

Evie's eyebrows furrow as she shakes her head, "Whatever." and Jay and Carlos watch as she takes the tray to the garbage can, dumps it clean, and then brings it over to the metal counter to be washed.

Mal looks at the glint of light on the blade. She should have done something to stop it, anything to stop it. I should have kicked more. She slides the blade towards her. I should have kneed him in the balls. She makes another small, deep incision. I should have just screamed. Why didn't I just scream? She places two long, deep cuts next to each other. "I should have tried something," she whispers, before she lightly slides the blade horizontally underneath the two smaller cuts and running over the two longer ones, creating what kind of appears to be a square.

"Mal," Evie calls.

"Go away," Mal yells back.

Evie steps towards the door and places her hand on it, "Please, Mal. Can you just come out and talk about this?"

"Don't you get it, E? I don't want to talk about it. That's why I left the table."

It takes a moment for Evie to respond, "Then let's just watch a movie or something. I hear movies are great. We should watch one." She doesn't speak. "Come on, M. Please."

"I don't feel like watching TV right now," Mal refuses.

"Then just let me in," Evie pleads.

"Um," Mal sadly laughs. "I'm, uh, not exactly decent right now."

There's silence for a minute, before Evie softly asks, "Why?"

Mal shakes her head as she stares down at the blood lines, "Because I deserve it." She hears the doorknob move back-and-forth. "I'm not letting you see me like this again."

Evie takes her hand off of the door, "You don't deserve this, Mal. Whatever Hook did to you, it's not your fault."

"And how would you know?" she questions. "You weren't there. You didn't even know me back then."

"No," Evie calmly responds. "But I know you now, and I can't believe you'd ever get so upset over something if you had any choice in it."

Mal clings harder to the blade as she grits her teeth, "Like I said, you weren't there. It was my fault. I started to hook up with some stranger, and because of that I found myself in a situation I couldn't get out of. What happened to me was my fault. If I hadn't gone out searching for some random guy to be with, then he wouldn't have even had the chance to do what he did."

"You did it for heat," Evie sternly reminds her. "You're not some slut. You did what you did to survive. You just got unlucky and wound up with the wrong guy. It's not your fault."

"Unlucky," Mal hysterically laughs. "You make it sound like I went to buy some nail polish at Curl Up and Dye only to find out it was cracked open and dried up."

"Then tell me what I should be comparing it to. What happened exactly?" Mal stays quiet. "Come on, M. Aren't I supposed to be like your best friend? If you can't tell me, then who else are you going to be able to tell?"

"No one," Mal asserts. "That's the whole point. I'm not telling anyone."

It's quiet for a minute, before Evie evenly comments, "Alright then. I won't ask again, but just know I'm here whenever you need me." Mal doesn't respond. "Okay, then. I'm just going to see how TV is really supposed to be. Feel free to listen in… if you like."

Mal stares down at her destruction. Just a mistake. Just some unlucky mistake. No. I could have stopped it. If I had just known… If I had just seen it coming. She holds the blade between her fingers and examines the bloody fingerprint she had left, "I could have stopped it."

- That's it for day four. Feel free to review on what you think so far. I love reading your guys's comments and questions, so don't hesitate.