I Will

(Day 22: Sunday Afternoon)

Ben takes his water bottle from the bench and drinks it, as he waits for the people to disperse and for his teammates to go back to the locker room, and when the bottle empties he walks up towards his coach. "Great game, Ben. You've done your school proud."

"Yes," Ben simply answers, and there's a quiet few seconds before he continues. "Coach. I have to tell you something."

He frowns, "What is it?"

"I think I have to quit the team."

Coach Jenkins smiles, "This is a joke, right? One of my best players leaving the team, could you imagine that?" Ben doesn't respond, and the Coach's smile falters. "You're not joking, are you?"

"No," Ben frowns. "I'm afraid I'm not."

The coach shifts his stance, "Son, if this is about those rumors going 'round—"

"It's not just the rumors," Ben interrupts. "This has been a long time coming. I've just been prolonging it as much as I could." The coach doesn't speak, so he continues, "Now that I'm king I'm going to have a lot of meetings and appointments, and since I'm still in school they're going to have to be placed in the afternoon."

Jenkins lets out a breath, "Ben. We've talked about this." before he attempts a smile. "You've got such a natural athleticism. You would really only need to show up to practice a couple days a week to go over the plays. You said it would be fine."

"Yes, well," Ben straightens his posture. "I've changed my mind." He sees his coach look off into the distance, "I just thought I'd give you one last good game. It wouldn't have been fair to leave you right before a match."

"I appreciate that," he finally replies, "but I don't believe you're leaving just because you're king now."

Ben is quiet for a minute, "You're right. I just thought that would make a good excuse. Not that anything I said was untrue, but it's not the reason why I need to leave."

"Then what is it?"

He looks away for a second, "Just what you said. Chad's being a real royal pain, starting all of these rumors about me, and maybe that's my fault… but I can't stand it anymore." He sees the coach listening intently. "The guys have been asking me questions, and I feel like my excuses have just been getting more and more lame every time I say them."

"Have you been changing your story at all?" he asks.

"No." Ben shakes his head, "Maybe. I don't know." before he lets out a stressed breath. "I can't keep doing this. I can't keep lying to the people I'm closest to."

"So, what? You're just going to avoid them?"

"Not entirely," Ben explains, "but maybe if I don't spend as much time with them, then they'd want to spend that time doing something other than asking me stupid questions."

Jenkins looks at him seriously, "You can't run away from your problems. They're just going to follow you."

Ben sadly laughs, "Don't you think if I had another option, then I'd take it?" and his coach silences. "I'm not allowed to tell anyone anything. If I can't explain myself and if they're just going to keep berating me with questions, then what else can I do?"

The coach calmly comments, "Your parents wouldn't want you to quit."

"Maybe," Ben agrees. "But they'd want me to confess the truth even less."

"Look. I know this must be hard—"

"Hard?" Ben exasperates. "And this? What could you possibly know about this? I'm a king, and I'm straight up lying to my kingdom on a daily basis! Why, King Ben. How have you been?" He glares at him, "Yeah. I'm fine. I've just had a life-threatening fever my entire life." but then he begins to feel disoriented and plops himself onto the bench, placing a hand to his head as he does so.

Jenkins takes a couple steps and kneels down on one knee, "Ben. You've got to calm down." but Ben shakes his head. "Where's your medicine?"

"In my locker," he replies under his breath, before he breaks into sobs. "Why? Why am I like this? Why is this happening to me?"

"Ben."

He looks up at his coach, "You know that my doctor hasn't been able to explain it? And then, there's my dad. He's all like 'we can handle it', 'you don't need to know why', and 'there is no need for a second opinion'." He huffs, but then he takes in a deep breath as the lightheadedness hits him further. "I— I don't feel well. I'm… dizzy."

"Hold on," Jenkins says as he stands to his feet. "I'll go get that medicine for you."

Ben looks up for a moment, watching him run back to the building, before he stares back down at the ground. It's like he's unable to think, and yet these images flash before him. There was a time very similar to this one, where he got upset and his father told him to calm down. "No. I'm not going to calm down. I'm a teenager. I think I deserve to be able to show the least bit of emotion every now and again. I mean, how is anyone supposed to know how I feel if— if…" He had placed his hand down on the dining table to keep himself steady.

"Honey. Maybe you should sit down," his mother suggested.

He shook his head, "No. I— I want to stand."

"Honey," his mother had worriedly said again.

At the sound of her voice he fell into the chair, "Why can't I just do what everyone else my age gets to do?" He remembers how she had come over to hand him the thermometer, but he rejected it. Instead, he just shook his head before resting it in his arms.

"Ben?"

Ben looks up and sees the coach handing him the tic-tac case and a water, "Thank you." and after he takes the items he downs three of the Tylenol.

The coach sits down on the bench, and after a minute he asks, "How are you feeling?"

Ben lets out a soft breath, "Tired. Just really tired."

Jenkins nods before saying, "You know, I was thinking…" Ben turns to look at him. "You had to get into sports, because you needed something to calm you down. But if this environment has turned into something stressful for you— Well, for someone like you stress can be a really bad thing, and you're already getting enough of it already… So, if this has turned into something stressful or anxiety provoking for you, then maybe it is best that I let you go."

Ben calmly responds, "Thanks for understanding."

Coach Jenkins smiles, "You betch ya."

Ben smiles back, but it doesn't take long for it to falter, "What did you mean by someone like me?"

"Oh that." He laughs it off, "You know, someone like you. Someone with your, ah… well, you know. Your condition."

"Right," Ben unsurely replies.

"Speaking of which," the coach continues. "All of that energy you display on the field, it's not just going to go away. If you quit this team, I need you to promise me that you will find something else."

Ben solemnly frowns, "I started when I was a kid, and kids have a lot of energy." before he looks down for a moment. "Just because I still have some energy, that doesn't mean that things are going to be as bad as they once were."

The coach gives him a stern look, "Promise me you will find an alternative."

He opens his mouth before saying, "Yeah. Don't worry. I will."

Jenkins smiles wide, "We're going to miss you, kid."

Ben nods before smiling back, "Yeah. I'm going to miss you too, Coach."

- Let me just thank everyone who has been leaving reviews. As always the first couple are scary to get, but the more that I've gotten the more reassurance I've had in this fanfiction and how I'm writing it... There was this one review that had a typo, and I'm pretty sure that repeated word replaced an important word; however, do not fret. After staring at it for a minute I think I understand what it was supposed to say, and I totally agree. It probably would make it easier for Ben to deal with his beastly qualities if Mal had been honest to him about what she is, but there are many reasons why she would not willing tell anyone about her and because of that Ben probably won't find out until certain circumstances present themselves... I say probably, but what are we kidding? I'm currently writing that chapter as we speak. I bet you all can't wait for him to find out.