Faded Memory

by Castlefan6

Authors Note: Thisis my AU version of what could have happened following Rick's discussion with Alexis about the night he danced, fell in love, and lost contact with a girl in college, sometimes memories come back at the worse time. COMPLETELY AU except for the conversation that prompted this and use of some characters names. THIS IS A CASKETT ENDING, EVENTUALLY

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

Chapter 13

Previously

Martha couldn't take her eyes off the room, and as the talks progressed, she became even more upset, till finally Rick stood up from the table, turned to look out in the direction of his Mother, with a very hurt look on his face, a look that Kate had never seen before,

Martha uttered the first words she had spoken since early in the morning which scared Kate to death,

"Oh God, he knows now" Martha said tearfully,

"Knows What Martha, are you OK, I mean you haven't been yourself all day,"

Kate noticed Rick glaring at Martha through the glass, as Allison tried to comfort him,

"Martha what does he know?" Kate asked more sternly.

"He knows that ***

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Midtown Loft & Terrace

5th Street New York

45 Minutes Later

Rick had left the meeting with Allison and stepped into the men's room where he totally lost everything on his stomach. After all this time, and poor Allison, Martha had allowed her to do her dirty work, not even brave enough to face her Son.

Rick was angry, well past angry with Martha, and it was all he could do to compose himself enough to step back out to the hallway, where Allison, and Kate both rushed to his side.

"Rick, What is it Babe? No matter what it is we're here, right here, and not going anywhere, so when you feel like talking" Kate pulls him into a tight hug as Allison catches his one hand in both of hers,

"Allison did you tell Kate what we discussed? It's OK Sweetie, I'm not upset with you, I just know how you felt when you found out your own Mother had deceived you and deliberately lied to your face, year after year." As he looked on the faces of his fiancé clearly worried, and Allison ready to burst into tears,

"Dad, I'm sorry, so sorry, I never should have brought this up, I never wanted to hurt anyone, especially you, but I seem to have just about destroyed you, " as she burst into tears,

Kate wrapped her into a tight hug, "Allison, no matter what was said, I know Rick, honey when he said he's not upset with you, please believe him, OK? Can you tell me what you were talking about when all this happened?"

Rick wrapped his arm around Kate's waist, and pulled Allison back towards him,

"Yeah, but not here Babe, I have to come to grips with this, and I need you to keep me sane," as he glared once again straight at Martha, who was weeping gently and shaking her head.

As they re-entered the Conference room, Kate, took the seat closet to the door, to prevent anyone from coming in, and not knowing anything yet, to try to get Rick and Allison to discuss whatever it was that had upset him so much.

"Allison, this isn't fair, but I need you to tell Kate what you told me, and the discussion we were having leading up to the moment I bolted for the men's room. I'm sorry baby, but I'm not sure I can get through it right now."

"Sure Dad, and again I'm sorry, I truly thought you knew, God I screwed this up so badly," she gets out between small sobs

"Allison, YOU have nothing to be sorry about, please believe me, I love you, even though I just met you, I got the same jolt of electricity when I hugged you exactly as I did the first time I held your sister."

She couldn't help it, nor could she hold it in any longer as Allison pulled Rick into a huge hug, "I know the feeling, I love you too Dad, I'm just so sorry you have to feel this hurt. Kate, Lex and I are here, and we'll work through this, please, just take it slow please. I know exactly how your heart is broken, but look at the hot chic's you have to make it go away", getting a weak smile from Rick, whose eyes were sad, pooled with tears and a look of disappointment on his face Kate had never seen before.

"Kate we were talking about the reason that drove me to seek Rick out, I intend on having kids someday, and I wanted to know any huge risk factors I might be facing. Dad said he was sorry that he could only supply the information from Alexis, himself and his mother and her heirs, it seemed he never knew his father or even his name.

I was a total Ass and blurted out, that I knew his father's information, my Private Detectives verified it last year when Martha came and spent a weekend with him at the Hamilton Hotel, in Washington DC. I shared the information with Dad, although I really don't think that he remembered much after learning his Mother knew all about his Dad. I'm so sorry Kate, I've hurt him so badly now, "

"Shhh, Shhh, Baby, you didn't do anything wrong." As Kate pulls the teenager trying so hard to be grown into her arms.

"You know why he is upset and with who, right, Allison, I guess you were shocked to find out about your Dad just about as much as he is now. You didn't do anything wrong, someone else put you in this position, and that's who he is furious with now."

Rick reached out and hugged them both, avoiding any glance toward Martha, in fact he found the remote and lowered the security and privacy blinds so she couldn't see anything.

"Dad, take these, it's the complete report on your Father, I know you and Grams are going to have to talk sooner or later, but at least you'll know what was discovered about him, and again I'm so sorry, I just knew this was going to hurt you somehow."

"Allison, I'm your Dad, it's my job now that I know about it, to protect you, not the other way around. You're right Mother and I are going to have a discussion, but I'm not ready to speak to her now, I'm not really sure how long it's going to take to be able to sit down with her and not want to scream, she knew, she knew with every time she lied to me. I made myself all right without knowing because I didn't have another choice.

I think of everyone you probably understand this situation best, and Baby, I'm more sorry for the time we lost, you, me Alexis and Kate than I ever will be for someone who knew about me but chose to stay out of my life."

"Dad, I know this is tough, I used to want to hate you, but when I found out the truth, the only thing I hated was the lies. Please give your Mother a chance, when you're up to it. This is just an FBI report, and some Private Detectives, I'm sure there's more to the story than this, that secret is still with you Mother, and your Dad.

Also, with this new development, I think I should hold off talking to Grams until after you two have an opportunity to discuss what happened, however long that is. I'm going to put this out here right now,

Dad, I may not have known you for long, but I swear, I'll love you just as you love me, and I'll try hard to make you proud of me each day, be a role model for Alexis, and a friend to your friends."

"You have no idea how proud you have already made me, Kate and Alexis. Sweetie, I'm sure it took a great deal of courage for you to do this, BUT We're so thankful that you did."

"I can say this Allison, we're getting married soon, and nothing would make me happier than to have BOTH my daughters in my bridal party, would you think about it, you don't have to answer today if you don*"

Kate is almost tackled with the young lady wrapping her in such a tight hug, "Of course I will, Kate, Thank you are you sure, I mean I un*"

"Of course, I'm sure, you're in the bridal party and that's settled."

Rick had taken this opportunity to step over to a corner of the room, call the car service, and order a car to take Martha home. He didn't want to see her the rest of the day at least, and the time they had left, he wanted to be a happy time. They just sat around the table, Rick in the middle, with both his ladies wrapping their arms around him.

About 15 minutes later there was a knock on the door, Kate peered out to see Alexis and Paula looking worried. Kate opened the door, she noticed Martha was gathering her belongings and approaching the door, Kate simply shook her head No, Martha reversed her tracks and followed the driver to the elevator doors.

"Dad, did you order a car for Grams, just Grams to take her home?"

"Yeah pumpkin, I did, we need to talk, your Grams and I but I'm not ready now, and I really don't want to say anything more about it now, OK?"

"Sure Dad, I mean I'm sure you guys will work it out, you always do" but even Alexis didn't have the usual enthusiasm.

Rick had made two copies of the file Allison had brought, he gave one to Paula, the other to Kate and asked them both to keep tabs on it.

"Paula, if you have time, see if you can verify some of the pertinent facts in here, and I'm sure I don't need to tell you this is highly confidential"

Paula turned and opened the folder and gasped, dropped the folder, then fought back tears as she retrieved it.

"Ricky, are you sure you don't want to pull in Paul or Jimmy for this, I mean you know I'll do what I can, but those two guys know everyone."

"I'm sure Paula, you're right, they know everyone which means everyone knows them, this has been carefully hidden for 37 years so we need to be careful not to blow up any connections along the way."

"OK Rick, and for what's it worth, I'm sorry, very sorry but I am glad Allison was such a gem. It seemed like you all had a great time with her, and she fit right into this family, especially Kate, Good Job Mom." Paula said sincerely.

"Thanks Paula, I'm just doing the best I can and when in doubt think what my Mom would have done, so far I've been lucky."

The day had passed so quickly, it was hard to realize it was already approaching 7:00 PM. Claude had been dutifully standing by and now had Allison's car parked in a secure spot, as they said hurried Goodbyes, it was agreed a family call was going to be held of Friday this week, just to keep everyone together.

Allison kissed first Kate, then Rick, then drew Alexis into a hug,

"Talk to you later little Sis,"

"Can't wait Big Sis," came her reply

Then Allison took Paula into a hug as well, expressing how thankful she was and asking her to call her if she had any questions on the files.

The ride to the loft was very quiet, Rick staring out the window and Kate held his hand on one side, and Alexis holding the other hand. They were trying but whatever Rick was feeling it was deep, it was hurt, and it wasn't going away anytime soon.

When they entered the Loft, Kate place her keys on the ring, and noticed a note laying on the bar, it was from Martha, she folded it in half and quickly handed it to Rick to read,

"Richard,

I know you probably think all sorts of things about me now, and in many ways you would be right. I only ask for an opportunity to explain my side of the story, when you are ready,

Until then, l''ll be at Chet's, I do love you Richard, that never changed,

Mother,"

Rick read the words, took the note to a drawer in his desk, opened it with a key, folded it neatly and re-secured the lock, all without saying a word.

He finally stopped, took Kate into his arms and said,

"Babe, I'm so sorry, I don't mean to be this way, it's just the lies, all the lies I just can't take them anymore."

Kate kissed him gently, and whispered, "I understand Babe, I'm here now and not going anywhere, here if you need me for whatever.

"I do need you, I need to lay on the bed and hold the woman I love and have her hold me. It's the only place I feel safe", and before he had finished speaking Kate had them both on the bed, her hugging Rick tightly, kissing him gently on his forehead. I got you now, it's going to be OK. Less than twenty minutes later, Rick had passed out from exhaustion in Kate's arms.

On the other side of the Park, Martha had cried herself to sleep, wondering WHY, but now knowing it was too late, all she could do now was wait for her son to call, God only knew how long it would be,