Faded Memory

by Castlefan6

Authors Note: Thisis my AU version of what could have happened following Rick's discussion with Alexis about the night he danced, fell in love, and lost contact with a girl in college, sometimes memories come back at the worse time. COMPLETELY AU except for the conversation that prompted this and use of some characters names. THIS IS A CASKETT ENDING, EVENTUALLY

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

Chapter 21

Previously

Kate added, "What's on the agenda for this week or should I ask, both of you girls are your Dad's girls so should I be worried about anything?"

Both laughed, and Allison spoke up "Dad, I hope it's OK, but Alexis and I plan on seeing Martha, I'd like to talk to her, and I'm really not upset, I hope that doesn't upset you or Mom."

"Not at all Allison, I never doubted she loved us all, it's just she and I will need to talk when things aren't so fresh and raw, I love her still, but just a warning to you, Alexis knows it already, She's a real pain in the Ass" as they all laugh.

"Dad, from what I hear it runs in the family, and I'm not revealing my sources," as Kate giggles from Rick tickling her, Allison is all smiles as she says

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Chet's Apartment

Later that Day

Martha was nervous, she had been since Alexis called earlier requesting permission to come see her, and bring her Sister, Allision. God, what was she going to say, I mean how to you justify keeping a secret like she had, especially to a daughter searching for her Dad, inexcusable, regardless of what Jackson had said to talk her into keeping silent. Well, all she could do was own up to her role, like Alexis had warned her, it's what you do after you screwup that marks your character.

The buzzer rang and Martha took a deep breath and answered to face not one, but two Granddaughters to give answers to.

"Hi Grams, thanks for seeing us, you remember Allison, don't you?"

"Yes Darling, I do, and thank you both for coming. I know there are many questions, I hope I can answer them for you, one I can tell you now is I don't know the WHY? All I know was someone convinced me it was better to keep quiet, but now I see that was perhaps the worst action I could have taken."

"Please come in, may I get you something to drink, tea, coffee, soda?" as she pointed to the sitting area where they would talk.

"Grams, Thanks but we're fine," Alexis responded for them both.

"Hi Martha, I'm sure everyone had reasons, I'm not here to blame, ridicule or make you feel any worse than you do already, actually I want to know is there anything I can do to help you and Dad get back as close as you were, I feel guilty." Allison spoke with confidence, not shyness. She was Richards daughter Martha thought.

"Well, Allison, let me say first how sorry I truly am, if I knew then what I know now, I wouldn't have hesitated to reunite you and your Dad, and Sister. I have been reminded that I hurt many people by my cowardice, and I am truly sorry to all. I am not offering excuses, I take responsibility for my actions, and as young ladies I think you both can understand the "Love Haze" that comes over you when you think you have met your Prince.

I did stupid things, then lied to cover them, a lie that lasted almost 11 years then I told even bigger lies to cover the first. It was never my intention to harm you or your family, Jackson had me convinced I was being a loyal citizen, perhaps he was being played as well, but looking back the situation had nothing to do with National Affairs.

The past is the past and can't be changed, but I would love to have the opportunity to play some role in your life, you remind so very much of your father, not only physical features but some mannerisms you and Alexis both had inherited. My son is a very Good Man, he's an honorable man, and I know he loves me but I also know, at least I'm beginning to see the depth of hurt I have caused him and you all.

"Martha, I never had a Grams, so if it's OK with you, I would like to be like Sis and call you that, I don't feel like I am showing you the respect you deserve by calling you by your first name or Miss Rogers. I hope that is OK?"

Alexis smiles as Martha pulls the young lady into her arms, "Welcome home Dear, Grams loves you, always has and always will, and Thank You. I know the hurt is big, and I'll work to make it right every day."

Allison pulls back from the hug slowly with tears in her eyes, and said,

"Hey Sis, do you mind if I crash your weekly lunch with Grams and you? I think that it's important for all of us to stay close, especially once the press gets wind of Richard Castle's Love Child, I can just imagine the mess it's going to be for Dad."

Alexis is beaming, "You know you don't have to ask Sis, but you raise a good point, maybe one Dad hasn't thought of. I think we need to visit Paula and see what we can do to help take care of Dad, once we leave here, OK?"

"Agreed"

"Grams, I forgive you, Alexis forgives you, now you need to work on Dad. I know Mom, er Kate said once she had him so pissed off, even to a point where she couldn't reach him by phone, email or text, till finally she sat down and wrote a letter to him and sent it signature required on delivery, knowing Dad's curiosity could never let it just sit, or throw it away without reading it. Guess it worked, I could never imagine Dad ever being that upset."

"He doesn't get that way often, but I've seen him upset to that point a few times, mostly when he was fighting my birth mother for custody for me" Alexis offered.

"Well even as a young man, he was slow to anger, preferring to walk away rather than fight, but after all the years of being bullied, God help the men who wouldn't let it go. Richard boxed Golden Gloves, and was quite good, he doesn't know I know since one of my ex-husbands took him and was his coach. The marriage may have ended but Rick and Henry's affection never did, till the day he died Richard stayed in contact." Martha said looking out the window, almost like reliving a day in the past.

"Are those the trophies Dad has stored away upstairs in the special storage box? I remember I went to put something on it, and he freaked out when I was little, I sat down and cried, and of course got what ever I wanted for about a week" Alexis eyes twinkled.

"You Brat, you took advantage of Dad like that? Really?" Allison quizzes, then she busted out laughing, "I would have made it two-weeks Sis, you caved too quickly" as all three women laughed.

"Yes Alexis, it's not the trophies so much as the memories of Henry that your Father fought so hard to hang on to. I remember when we got divorced, Richard actually went to Henry's to live until he could talk him into coming home, even then he was so angry at me. I don't think he said a word that he didn't have to for almost 6 months."

"What happened Grams" Allison and Alexis asked in unison, turning to smile at each other.

"Well Henry died, he had Cancer and didn't want Richard to see the last few months, so he went to his Son's home in Florida, and when he passed, well it was difficult for Richard. Henry was the only father he had known, perhaps that's why he is so hurt and angry at Jackson. Henry wrote him a very sweet letter, and actually your Dad inherited Henry's garage with the vintage cars and airplanes. He never touched them, he looks at them often, but they're exactly as Henry left them, gosh, that was almost 25 years ago."

"Grams, I think you found your starting point for your letter to Dad, I mean if anything will grab his attention, the memory of a Dad he had prayed for probably for years, to have and then lose him, I'm sure he is still hurting. I know I had to go to therapy once I discovered the lie, I felt so, well unworthy, that I wasn't good enough and that's why I never got to meet Dad." Tears pool in Allison's eyes as she is wrapped in hugs from both Martha, and Alexis.

"Listen to me young Lady, YOU did nothing wrong, this is on me, and I promise you I'm going to make it right or work on it till my last breath. It's far too important to have our family, our entire family together again.

I know they would never shut me out completely, but I want to be part of Katherine's children like I was Alexis, and I want to be part of both of your lives. It starts today, and Girls, Thank You for coming, even more for being so open, honest and forgiving. Now I have a letter to write and you need to see Paula. I love you both, so I'll see you at lunch on Thursday, OK?"

Alexis smiles "Grams, it's a date, I already changed the reservation to party of three"

Allison wraps her arm around Alexis then pulls Martha into a group hug, "Till Thursday Grams, stay safe, and keep working no matter what, like you said, nothing is more important than this family."

Martha closed the door behind her Granddaughters, feeling more hopeful than she had in several days. It was almost like looking at Richard at that age, Allison was a carbon copy of her Dad, with or without DNA there was no doubt this young lady was the child of her son. Martha thought how lucky she was that she possessed the same quality for forgiveness that Richard did, she only hoped now she could find the words to unlock that part of his heart.

She hadn't thought how he would feel seeing his birth father, almost like she was trying to wipe Henry from his memory, the only REAL Dad he had ever know. The hurt he must have felt, it was no wonder he struck out at Jackson and her the manner he did. Another huge mistake on her part, she needed to make right, and she would, starting now. She gathered her writing materials, tossed the remainder of the wine down the drain, and settled in to write perhaps the toughest letter she would ever have to write.

TBC