Faded Memory
by Castlefan6
Authors Note: Thisis my AU version of what could have happened following Rick's discussion with Alexis about the night he danced, fell in love, and lost contact with a girl in college, sometimes memories come back at the worse time. COMPLETELY AU except for the conversation that prompted this and use of some characters names. THIS IS A CASKETT ENDING, EVENTUALLY
I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only
Chapter 22
Previously
"Yes Alexis, it's not the trophies so much as the memories of Henry that your Father fought so hard to hang on to. I remember when we got divorced, Richard actually went to Henry's to live until he could talk him into coming home, even then he was so angry at me. I don't think he said a word he didn't have to for almost 6 months."
"What happened Grams" Allison and Alexis asked in unison, turning to smile at each other.
"Well Henry died, he had Cancer and didn't want Richard to see the last few months, so he went to his Son's home in Florida, and when he passed, well it was difficult for Richard. Henry was the only father he had known, perhaps that's why he is so hurt and angry at Jackson. Henry wrote him a very sweet letter, and actually your Dad inherited Henry's garage with the vintage cars and airplanes. He never touched them, he looks at them often, but they're exactly as Henry left them, gosh, that was almost 25 years ago."
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Paula Haas Office
Two Hours Later
"OK you two what's so important that you needed to see me right away" Paula exclaimed
"Well we were wondering, actually worried about what the plan was once the Press get's word of me being Richard Castle's Love Child from his wild, untamed youth" Allison rushed out,
"Paula, Sis is so afraid that something bad is going to happen to Dad, or his career once the news gets out, I told her we should talk to you and if a plan isn't in place, then I'm sure we could put one together to ease her mind."
"Well, first off, it's great you worry about your Dad and his image, second you came to the right source. Rick and I have spoken a little about what to do, but I take it you have some ideas Allison, we can discuss those and I'll run it by Rick OR you two could present it. You probably stand a better chance to get him to agree to anything since he would do anything for his family."
Allison smiled at Alexis, "Well Sis, you want to break the shocker to Paula, I'll let you do the honors" as she laughed.
Chet's Apartment
Same Time Frame
Martha started out with a flourish, but soon discovered, it wasn't as easy a task as she had originally thought, well not if she wanted the letter to mean something and begin to open the door she had slammed with her son. Around her lay crumpled sheets of both stationary and then legal pad sheets, having switched to the legal pad once she was aware that she wasn't going to be able to sit and jot the letter and be done, it would take thought, and careful wording if Richard were to accept her work as heartfelt.
"Dear Richard,
I can honestly say, I have developed a deeper appreciation for what you do, finding the correct words to express how your heart feels has proved to be much more challenging than I ever imagined. One more item to add to my list to apologize for, so before I allow my frustration to ball yet another sheet of paper and throw it at the waste basket, let me apologize for the times I told you that what you do isn't really work, it is, and is definitely harder than you make it look.
I am sorry for every time I made light of your contribution to society, your success speaks for itself, yet your Mother is one of the last to understand just how hard you work to find the exact words to make your story real, I'm trying Richard, I truly am.
Well, since I digressed from my original thought line, I will share this with you, I love my Granddaughters, both of them and we as a family are truly blessed. Allison is more like you than I would ever have imagined, her sense of honor, and her ability to forgive are traits she inherited from you. We had a wonderful visit, and as she put it "We're good Grams, now work on making Dad know how sorry you are, please?" she and Alexis both are women that will make a difference in this world, no matter what they do.
As we talked, she pointed out some thoughts I am sure I glossed over in my decision to bring Jackson to our Family Meeting, especially without asking for permission. I truly am sorry for that, one of many inconsiderate acts I am afraid I have committed over the last few years. Please tell Kate, I apologize to her as well, she should feel comfortable in her home, without the fear of your meddlesome mother coming crashing through closed doors, again, I am truly sorry to you both.
As we reflected on your younger days, Allison asked me about Henry, and it was like a slap in the face, I now know how much it must have hurt you to see Jackson standing where, well we both know that Henry was the Dad you never had, and for that I will always be thankful, even if you did hide the Golden Gloves from me. I forgive you for that since as always Henry knew exactly what you needed and provided a means for you to reach your goal.
Once again, I tried to protect you and wound up hurting you even more, you see Richard Henry had Cancer of the brain, not stomach. When he left he knew he would never see you again, at least that he would remember and he wanted to spend his last days without clouding your memory of him as your Rock, your Strength and he felt he let you down.
I know I should have been honest with you, but I did this as much for Henry as I did you. One thing I was always sure of, he couldn't have loved you anymore than he did, you were always his world and I know he was and will always be Dad to you, I'm happy I did something right back then.
I know I have avoided the name you detest, Jackson so here goes. I told Alexis and Allison I made a lot of mistakes, mostly because I was in a "Love Haze" and thought I had met my Prince. I told a lie to protect you, 11 years later I was forced to tell even more lies, and perhaps 4 years ago was the hide mark of my deceit. I'm sure you don't want the details of the early meeting, only WHY I never told you when I found out, and especially how I could keep Allison's existence from you, what mother can do that to her Son?
All I can say, and this is the truth as much as I can recall, I had told so many lies it became second nature and Jackson had me convinced that what I was doing was for the good of the nation. I know now, it was for the good of those willing to pay the highest price for espionage in the industrial world, it had nothing to do with National Security. That's why Allison's Grandfather had come upon his radar, the instant coffee market was about to take off.
I wanted to believe that Jackson had been duped as well, but unfortunately, that wasn't the case. He's gone again, this time I hope for good and I apologize with all my heart for not being the Mother you thought I was, that hurts me more than anything in this world.
OK, Richard, here it is Kiddo, my cards are on the table, nothing held back. All I can do is apologize, and if that isn't good enough, well as much as it hurts me, I'll honor your wishes and stay away. I do thank you for allowing my Granddaughters to see me, that meant more to me than you'll ever know. I know even if you forgive me, it'll take time, time to earn your trust once again and I will work to do that, if you let me. The decision is yours my Son, I await your reply with all the love in my heart I have and will always have for you,
Love,
Mother"
Martha re-read the letter several times both on the legal pad and as she transferred it to the stationary Richard had given her for her last Birthday. She carefully sealed the envelope, called the Courier Service, and dispatched the letter, requesting signature required by Richard Castle only.
Now all she can do is wait, something none of the Rogers, Castle clan was good at it, but she had no choice now. She thought back, recalling the hurt look in Richard's deep blue eyes, so hurt he was afraid to speak, knowing he would say something he would regret. The silent banishment was appropriate, even kind in one way. He allowed her to sleek away without having to face the lies that had cost a beautiful lady a family she went to the ends of the world to find.
She looked at her phone, and composed a group text to Alexis and Allison,
"The letter of apology is on its way, fingers crossed, but I hate waiting"
The replies came almost simultaneously, first from Alexis,
"It'll be OK Grams, Dad loves you"
"Proud of you Grams, Sis and I will do what we can on our end, we need our family together, Dad Loves you and so do Alexis and I"
It felt so good to have the love of both Alexis and Allison, two beautiful young ladies, not because they were her Granddaughters, but because, they both had the capacity to love and forgive, now she prayed her Son would as well.
TBC