[crate appears with the words "Operation:Antartica]
New York Docks
(Skipper's POV)
The Five of us watched from our hiding place as those twobit thieves were up to something. One of the two criminals brick I believe was operating the crane stupidly I might add. Cecil was giving brick direction when a police car drove up and put's it's spotlight now. Cecil noticing the police officer then started to pretend to do calisthenics. The police officer turn off his spotlight and drove off glaring at cecil the entire time.
Brick the slammed a crate full of fish into the pile of crates next to cecil. Cecil glared in brick's direction as he picked up a fish, "OH, brick?" "Yeah, cecil?" brick said as cecil threw a fish in his face knocking him out of the crane. They may not be watched by the police but they can't escape my gaze. "Well, well, looks like our old two-bit thieves have hit the hight seas," I said. "Thank you captain obvious," Elsa replied. "Did I ask for your comments?" I said.
Elsa rolled her eyes (I might have to court mashall her for excessive moxie!), "Kowalski," she said totally stealing my line, "what's the catch of the day?" "let's see," Kowalski said, "looks like 12 tons of…gasp! Patagonian toothfish?!" "Patablahoian tooblah?" Rico said. "I don't understand either one of those words," Private said. "Argentina and some type of fish," elsa said. "That doesn't clear things up," Private said. "These felonious chumps have been pirate fishing in Antarctic waters," Kowalski said. "What!" Elsa said. "those fiends," I replied.
"also over my head," Private said. "that's the penguin's mother land," I said, "boys, those deep water deadbeast just stol from our mama!" "no way!" Private said. "Mama?!" Rico shouted. "Their not actually stealing from our mama," Elsa muttered. "All right you shanty, singin' salt dogs," I said, "You wanna play pirate? Who am I to arrgghh-ue?" elsa faceplamed, "I thought you hate puns." "I hate Dave's puns," I replied, "I mean Nicolas, cage them? come on!" "Oh, that I got!" Private said. "of course you did!" Elsa replied. "argh!" Cecil was operating a forklift and thought he could get away as he drove to warehouse 25A. He look around suspiously but then shock his head contiuned driving.
He then looked to his side and saw the five of us wearing pirate hats and driving in the car next to him. Rico put up a pirate flag as he said, "argh!" as we contined to drive next to him. Using the ramp we built earlier and launch the car towards his forklift. "Wait…" Cecil said, "Isn't that the…?" Our car smashed into him and bounced away before landing. The forklift crashed dropping it's fishing cargo and exploded. Brick was holding a cardboard box, "Cecil?" Private, Elsa, Kowalski, and Rico attacked. "bah!" "ahoy!" "shiver my timbers!" "I'm going to kick you in the face now!" cecil climbed out of the wreakage of his forklift. He saw rico and shouted, "You!" as he jumped out from behind the wreakage. "en garde!" rico shouted pointing a wrench like it was a sword.
Cecil grabbed his crowbar but then made the tactical mistake of showing off, "That's a bad move, bird. I was captain of the fencing team…" Rico hit cecil in the foot with his wrench. "ow!" Obviously he got rusty with his fencing skills. Brick meanwhile was chasing me to exactly to where I wanted him to be. Brick stopped and was out of breath. A stage light came on, "Huh?" brick said as private appeared on the stack of boxes next to him. "Oh, I am the pirate king!" Private said, "and it 'tis, it 'tis a glorious thing to be a pirate king!" "really?" elsa muttered. "woo-hoo-hoo!" "ha,ha, ha," brick said, "bird." A wreaking ball came out of nowhere and took brick with it (no not like that one song). Rico and cecil contiuned their "sword" fight (good thing their weren't fighting with fish because that is totally a Me and Hans the puffin thing) until Cecil got hit by brick and the wreaking ball.
Kowalski brought the crane arm back in front of the crane cabin and said, "argh." Af few mintues later we had the two thiefs tied up. "Thank you, loading area. Good night!" "what do you mean loading area? it's only the five of us and these two," elsa said. "Hey!" a voice shouted, "is somebody out there?!" Private was the only one who heard her and being the big-hearted penguin he was rushed over to the source of the voice. "Hello?" Private said. "Please! I'm about to get fish sticked!" Private took…you know what how about we let private tell this part! (Kowalski's POV) Why? (Skipper's POV) just because…
(Private's POV)
I slide thru a vaguely familiar factory. "where are you?" I said. "Up here! Inside the tank!" I slid to a stop and found a fishhopper that was over metal jaws of death. The fish was groundup and packed as fishsticks. I jumped to the top of the tank and looked inside. "What happened?" I said. "Some jerk snagged me in one of their stupid fishing nets!" "You're all the way from Antarctica then?" I said. "Are we really having a conversation right now?" "sorry, hang on!" "hang on to what? Everything's either slicey or smashy or fish!" Blowhole…if you are spying on this right now with you advanged looking at you technology…I swear I'm going to… "Just…just give me your hand," I said, "trust me." And then to my horror a…LEAPORD SEAL jumped out of the fish at me.
I tried to run away but ended up trapped in the tank with the seal. "Why didn't you tell me there was a leopard seal in here with you?!" I shouted throwing fish at the seal in an attempt to escape. "ow! I am the leopard Seal, dummy!" That even worst…helping a leapord seal…nature's snake…Skipper going to demote me for sure! "Predator! Deceiver! Nature's snake! Carnivorous Charlatan! Wha!" The leapord seal jumped at me shook me around a bit and…wait…saved me? "You… You saved me," I said completely confused. (Skipper's POV) Don't trust her private! Remember leapord Seals are Nature's snakes! (Kowalski's POV) aren't snakes nature's snakes? (Skipper's POV) Quiet! (Elsa's POV) ladies your both pretty…NOW STOP INTERRUPTING THE STORY! (Private's POV) anyway…where was I?
"You…you saved me?" I said completely confused. "Yeah, and I kind of expected some rescue payback," the leapord seal said. "there you are. Come on! Johnny Law just spotted our pirate roundup," Skipper shouted. "Go on, I'll catch up!" "Nippin' the old processed fish sticks?" Skipper said, "all right, just don't ruin your supper." Skipper went to leave but stopped long enough to say, "we're having fish." "Why, yes, of course," I said. I looked around frantically until I found the factory control panel. "Hey!" the leapord Seal shouted before losing her grip. But luckly I lowered the factory crane hook just in time and pulled her out of the tank.
She fill to the ground in front of me I flinched fearing her next move. I approached her but before I could ask "Is she dead?" She suddenly put her flippers up and said, "Yes! You rock, little penguin!" "Please don't eat me," I replied. "Are you kidding me?" the seal said, "I don't even like penguin. It smells like orca poop." Oh good…wait…ORCA POOP! "hello?" she said. "Ok," I said from a safe distance above, "so I believe you. I'm just gonna keep believing you from up here!" "You know what? Believe what you want. I'm going home. Now, which way would that be?"
(Skipper's POV)
later that night…
Penguin HQ
"Curiously, officer found the duo tied up and ready for arrest. And in an even curiouser twist…One of the men had a live fish shoved down the back of his slacks." Kowalski, Elsa, and I glared at Rico. "eh…what are you gonna do?" rico said. "Ok, so…Who likes surprises?" Private said. "oh no…not that question…" Elsa said. "Shh…we're watching our press," I said. "Along with depleting endanger fishing stocks, pirate boats often snare other helpless wildlife in their nets, like albatrosses and leopard seals." "Oh they just had to bring them up," elsa said. "What it his hippie media spin?" I said, "since when is removing leopard seal from the predator chain a crime?" "Leopard seals," Kowalski said, "Nature's whiskeriest killing machine!"
"Right, so… if hypothetically one of us resced a whiskery killing machine…" RESCUE? WHAT PENGUIN IN THEIR RIGHT MINDS RESCUES A LEOPARD SEAL? A dead one maybe…must definitely not a penguin who's alive. "Mind you, a very pleasant one…" "Hypothetical denied, Private," I said, "There's no such thing as a pleasant killing machine." Just then a whiskery killer machine dropped thru our hatch. "Hi. I'm…" "Killer machine!" "Leopard seal hit the deck!" Elsa said. "No not when it's in here!" Kowalski shouted. Kowalski, Rico, Elsa and I then went into full scale panic mode. "Wait! Stop, everyone!" Private shouted, "It's OK. I brought her here."
We all stopped and looked at Private in shock. "What?" Elsa said. "say what?" Rico said. "It was Bricks and Cecil's fault," Private said, "They accidentally caught…actually, I didn't catch your name." "Hunter…" Upon hearing the word hunter we went back into panic mode. We managed to knock each other out except elsa. "Honestly, how is that helpful?" Private said. Hunter then did the seal version of a sholder shrug. "Please, all she wants to is go home to Antarctica," Private said, "she's not gonna eat any of us." "Are you that blind?" elsa said.
"Don't fall for her blubbery lies, private," I said as we set up our protective fort, "Leopard seals eat penguins." "Not me. I am a strict fishetarian," hunter said as Private feed her a fish., "see? Bird meat is gross. Has anybody here actually tasted penguin?" Rico raised his flipper causing us to look at him in shock. "Great, right? I mean, how lucky was I, running across the one leopard seal who doesn't eat penguins?" Elsa faced palmed and Kowalski said exactly what was on everybody's mind, "Oh, your poor, naïve half-wit," Kowalski said, "All leopard seals start out with a non-penguin diet…fish, krill, your basic smaller squids." "I love squid. It's like gummy seafood." "but once they grow out of the pup years, even the most strict "fishetarian" seal turns into a…well I'll just let eh hand puppet illustrate this one."
"Oh," Kowalski in a highpitched voice, "Hello, ms. Leopard seal…I hear you only eat fish." And then in a deep voice, "No more, sucker!" Kowalski then made eating sounding effects as he smashed the seal and penguin puppet together. "What? That's just silly talk!" "Hey! Don't know me, can't judge me. "Oom, nom, nom." "ummm, lean." "I don't even sound like that," hunter said. "Oh! Please, don't!" "Would you get that puppet out of my face?!" Hunter the bite the head off of the penguin puppet. "Wah!" Kowalski shouted. "yikes," Hunter said, "so…that was weird…right?" "Well, we'll just have to get her home while she's still young." YOU want to go to the leopard seal colony? "What?" Rico said. "Have you gone completely mad?" I asked holding up the puppet head.
"She's in trouble, Skipper," Private said, "And as penguins of honor, it's our duty to help." "He got you there Skipper," Elsa said. "Fine…" I said. SHORTY… WE straped her into the emergency evacuation launcher, "You should splash down somewhere in the East River," Kowalski said, "then…go south." "Hunter's only a pup. She'll never make it to Antarctica on her own." "Sure she will. Leopard Seals are a crafty breed," I said, "Rico, count us down!" "three…two…one!" But then at the exact moment Kowalski pushed the button he jumped on top of the leopard seal and was launched into the air with her. "Private!" I shouted. "bring him back!" elsa shouted. "Gah! Why didn't I install an undo button?!" "Boys…" "Not all of us are boys," elsa replied. I waved elsa off, "Private just hitched a ride on the pit-a-pet- express to New Deadburg!"
"Making up Town names…that never goes well for us," Elsa muttered. "We don't let a man swim into seal-infested waters alone. Even our most naively stupid man." "orders, Skipper?" Kowalski said. "Fire up the submarine, Mr. Kowalski. We're going to… dramatic pause…" "Oh get on with it," Elsa said, "we're going to Antatrtica!" The sub was loaded and was speeding towards the southern ocean. "Rico, weapons check. Test fire the torpedo tubes," I said.
Rico nodded and started pushing the buttons to activate the torpedo tubes only to get lemur sounds. I opened one of the torpedo tubes and to my horror found julian sleeping in it. "What in the name of Aaron Burr's slapping glove?" "Bah!" Julian said, "Hello. Do you like my secret royal nappity tube?" Elsa faced palmed, "Julian…" "It's dark, It's quiet, and it makes me fell like a handsome vampire. Bah." vampires probably don't say bah…they probably say Blah-de-blah or something." (DRAC's POV) I DO NOT SAY BLAH-DE-BLAH! (Skipper's POV) well nobody asked you…and don't you have a hotel to run or something? (Drac's POV) I should probably get back to that.
(Skipper's POV) "shall we reverse course to dump our unwanted cargo, Skipper?" "Oh please…yes," Elsa said. "Negative," I said as I pulled ringtail out of the tube, "Private needs us ASAP." "Hey, a little respect for the undead," Julian said. Your not a vampire julian.
"Ringtail, Prepare yourself for an epic journey of Carnivorous peril, from which we may not return!" "Oh," Julian said, "Will there be the possibility of forbidden love with a beguiling lady werewolf?" "You read too many teenage vampire romances," Elsa said. "I do not," Julian said. Elsa picked up the Twillight book that was in Julian "royal nappity tube" Oh I hate that series, "Nope," I said. "Man," Julian said, "OK. But, I'm gonna do my handsome vampire mopey face." Julian then his handsome vampire mopey face, "Bah…" "This is going to be a long trip," Elsa muttered. "Skipper do you really want to be stuck with him for…" Kowalski pulled out his calculator, "Eight thousand five hundred twenty-three miles?" "IF that's what it takes to rescue private," I said, "if that what it takes." "Now that dedication," Julian said, "I'll try not to be too annoying…" "Well that's a first," Elsa said clearly not believing him.
(Private's POV)
Lower New York Bay
Hunter and I landed in the water near the statue of liberty. "Are you sure about this?" Hunter said. "Let's get you home," I said taking the rope off of her. She picked me up in her mouth and shook me around, "Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!" She noticed that I looked quesy and dropped me back down into the water, "oh, sorry," she said. "That's all right," I said, "we're all friends here." "So we're friends now?" "well, maybe not quite yet," I added, "but you know just the thing for that?" "ROADTRIP!" we both shouted at the same time.
(Skipper's POV)
One Long and unnessary Song sequence later
Penguin Submarine
We were all on course when suddenly julian grabbed the wheel. "Do a barrel roll!" "No!" Elsa shouted knocking him off the wheel. "Oh the penguin woman is no fun," Julian said.
(Private's POV)
We finally arrived in Antartica. We exited the water and landed on a small iceflow. "Oh, my gosh! We're totally close!" "Great!" I said, "you recognize this place then?" "No," she replied, "I can just tell because of all the leopard seals." You mean all the leopard seal who don't share your fishetarian ways? "ahhh!" I shouted as I noticed that we were surrounded by leopard seals. After a few seconds of screaming I fainted. "Hey!" hunter said. "Seals," I said, "so many. So mouthy." "Would you cut it…" she said, "You're Ok, private. They haven't caught your scent yet." "How can you be sure?" I said.
"Because, all of your tasty part are still attached to your other parts." Afraid a few minutes of silence, "I do know this place! There's a tunnel down there that leads to my village!" "what, down there with the seals?" "Uh...kind of." I took a deep breath calmed my nerves (and my instincts) and said, "right…stay calm and carry on." We dived into the water with me on hunters back. Hunter swam towards her fellow seals and making sure that I was facing away from the others. "food?" Oh great there downing the one word thing (at least food is better then…Fossa Hungry Fossa eat) We pasted several more seals who all said, "food?" One seal just floated their and sniffed getting real close to finding me. Luckly hunter pushed him away just in time.
A lone seal moved up who shouldn't be a probably given what Kowalski said about pups'diets. "food," the lone seal pup said. "FOOD!" the rest of the leopard seals said. "Ahh!" we shouted as me made a break for the tunnel. Two seals followed us into the tunnel while the rest got held up by…Skipper? And the others.
(Skipper's POV)
The Submarine
"Custom horn," Julian said, "this is so boss." Elsa and I facepalmed at the same time. "yes," Kowalski said, "it's the little details that make a war machine." "private… in extreme peril," I said. "right," I said. A gang of leopard seals started to swim our way and Rico instantly alerted us. "Fire all Torpedoes!" I shouted not noticing julian's guilty expression. Rico started to push the buttons to fire off the torpedoes but all the shot out was fruit. "What!" Elsa shouted. The seal just watched in confusion as the fruit floated to the surface. We all glared at Julian, "hee hee, "he said, "No, It's Ok, because I also put the torpedoes in the fruit place." "WITH MORT!" we all shouted. "Oh…now I feel the stupidness…"
meanwhile back at the lemur habitat…
Mort had stupidly put a torpedo in the blender. "Hello, Banana. Would you like to be a smoothie now?" "uh…mort," Maurice said, "that's not a banana." "Yes it is I found in the fruit place," Mort said as he turned on the blender. As soon as the blender started spinning the torpedo exploded sending mort flying into the air, "Why, Banana?!" "why do I even bother," Maurice muttered.
The Penguin Sub
The leopard seal started to bang into the sides of the sub. "Nice try, Psycho killers," I said complete unaware of my comrades getting thrown around, "No tiny-brained seal skull can pound throught six inches of steel." "Tell me, where did you find the invisible see-throught steel?" Julian said. "I told you we should have built an all metal sub!" elsa shouted. I facepalmed as a seal smashed into the glass. "oh, shiitaki mushrooms," I said. A barrage of water slammed into us and the sub went spirling to the bottom.
(end of part One)