Better of You

(Day 78: Sunday Morning)

There's a knock at the door, and Mal looks up just as Belle lets herself in. She looks back down, peeling the dead skin from her arm into the trash, "I thought the purpose of knocking was to let the other person say you can enter."

"I wasn't sure if you would be up yet," she answers, "but I still wanted to give fair warning."

"Consider me warned," Mal irritably replies, before she spots the pillow and swipes it a few times to get the skin pieces off. She puts the pillow back and notices Belle come closer in concern and interest, "Molting. The poison gets pushed to my outer layer of skin, and then I get to enjoy the lovely task of peeling it off." She places the next strip into the garbage can, "Kind of like snake skin, except not so nice and dry. It's more sticky. Like sunburn." She shrugs, "Or so Jay tells me. I've never actually gotten sunburned before."

"I would think a snake skin would be sticky at first too," Belle unsurely comments. "The dryness is probably just from the time since the snake had shed it."

"Whatever," Mal responds with disinterest, before she sighs. "Do you think Audrey would mind if I took a shower?"

"No. I'm sure she wouldn't."

"Great," Mal responds in irritation. "Now, if only I had brought clothes."

"Would you like me to see if Audrey has something she won't miss?"

"That would be nice," Mal nonchalantly answers.

"Okay." Belle pauses, "I will go ask her."

Mal looks up as Belle leaves, before she scratches at her scalp and rolls her eyes as several purple strands stick to her nails, clumps of dead skin stuck onto them. She uses her other hand to pull them off and then watches as they fall into the trash. "Well," she mumbles, "at least you're lucky. It's not like you have to lose all of your hair."

Belle comes in again with a pile of clothes in hand, "Did you say something?"

"No," Mal shakes her head. "Just reminding myself how lucky I am." Belle doesn't speak, so she eyes the pile of colorful fabrics. "Those mine?"

"Actually, yes," Belle raises her eyebrows. "Audrey says you can keep them." Mal stands from the bed, before she walks up to her and unfolds the brown and green knitted sweater, "Huh. I wonder why."

"It's the thought that counts," Belle reminds her.

"And she thought she could pawn her old Christmas shirt on me and tell her family it's charity," Mal insightfully says, before she smiles at Belle. "Thank you."

"No problem," Belle smiles back. "Do you need me to show you where the bathroom is?"

"Out in the hall, I'm guessing?" Belle doesn't speak. "Yeah. You can show me."

"Hey," Ben smiles, but then he sees the sweater and immediately frowns.

"I know." Mal seethes, "It's really bad, isn't it?"

"Well, uh," he uncomfortably smiles, "green doesn't exactly complement your hair." She grumbles, and he hurriedly reassures, "But it could be worse."

"It can always be worse," Mal irritably responds. "That doesn't make me feel any better."

"No," Ben frowns. "I suppose it wouldn't."

"Hey," Audrey chimes in as she nears them with a grin. "How's it going?"

Mal gives her a look, "I thought you were at church."

"We leave at noon." She hurriedly explains, "It starts at eight and the sermon is only two hours, so really we could leave before then, but we like to stay until noon." She glances at her silver watch, "And it is currently one."

Ben frowns as he sees Mal's confusion, "She would like to invite us to lunch before we head back to Auradon."

"Oh." Mal uncomfortably smiles, "I knew that."

"Are you feeling up to it?" Audrey worries.

"I think I'll be able to eat something without puking it up, yeah," Mal evenly answers.

"Good," Audrey smiles, before she grabs Mal's arm. "You can sit next to me."

"Wasn't I already sitting next to you? Or, well, across from you?" Mal manages as she stumbles after Audrey's fast pacing steps.

"And now we get to be even closer," she enthuses, and when Mal looks over her shoulder she sees Ben's cautious expression.

"Hold on," Mal pulls back on her, and she spins around to face her. Audrey frowns, and Mal widens her eyes, "What's this about?"

She tenses a smile, "I just thought we could try to get along more." before she glances down. "You know, I just feel like I never really gave you a chance."

Mal frowns, "My eyes didn't glow, did they?" and then Audrey frowns again. "Great. I'm still broken. Keep it up like this and I just might lose my hypnotism for good next time."

"Don't worry," Audrey tries to reassure. "I'm sure you will get it back eventually."

She shakes her head, "Audrey. What's going on?" before she notices her frown again as her eyes shift to Ben.

When they look at Ben his posture stiffens, "Anything you would like to say to my girlfriend you can say to me."

Audrey half laughs, "You know, it's probably not even worth mentioning."

"What's not worth mentioning," Mal prods.

"And we shouldn't keep our parents waiting," she continues on.

Ben sighs, "She's right. We shouldn't." before he walks past them and Audrey turns around again; however, Mal grabs her arm to stop her.

"What's going on here?" she insists.

"Later," Audrey urgently whispers, before she turns around again and Mal follows her out to the dining room.

"It's mostly leftovers," Aurora states as the three of them take their seats, Mal sitting between Audrey and her father. "But the potato salad and sandwiches are new."

Belle smiles, "I'm sure it will be lovely all the same."

"Grace," Audrey announces with excitement, before she offers her hand to Mal.

Mal glances at it, "You do this at every meal?"

"Yeah," she laughs.

"Seems a little overkill," Mal opinionates, but Audrey doesn't flinch. She lets out a breath, rolling her eyes, "Fine."

"Yay," Audrey grins, before she offers her other hand to Ben.

He darts his eyes between the hand and her, "I think I'll pass."

Mal gives him a look, "What happened to it's their castle and we should do it?"

"It's just lunch," he excuses before tilting his head. "Come on. Like all Catholics pray before lunch."

Audrey immediately interrupts the would-be tense silence, "It's alright. It's his choice."

"Does that mean I have a choice?" Mal questions.

"Come on," Audrey giggles. "Just one more time."

Mal sighs, "Okay." as she tenses her own smile.

Audrey closes her eyes, "Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name; thy kingdom come; thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven." and then Mal shuts her eyes as well. "Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us, and lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil." Her voice becomes more passionate and emotional, "Oh, my God, I place my trust and confidence in You, who will reward the good and punish the wicked. I believe in You and accept everything You have taught and revealed. I believe that in one God there are three Divine Persons: God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. I believe that God the Son became Man without ceasing to be God. He is Jesus Christ, my lord and my Savior, the Redeemer of the human race. He died on the Cross for my salvation and eternal happiness." Mal feels Audrey's hand tighten onto hers. "Oh, my God, give me a strong faith. Help me to believe with lively faith. Oh, my God, all-good and all-merciful, I sincerely hope to be saved. Help me to do all that is necessary to gain eternal salvation. I have committed many sins in my life, but now I turn away from them." Mal opens her eyes and notices Audrey's deep frown. "I am sorry, truly sorry for all of them, because I have offended You, my God, Who are all-good, all-perfect, all-holy, and all-merciful. I love you— oh, my God— with all my heart. Please forgive me for havin' offended You. I promise that, with Your help, I will never offend You again." Mal looks at Ben, but he only shrugs a shoulder in response. "My God, have mercy on me. For the kingdom, the power, and the glory are yours now and for ever. Amen."

"Amen," Mal unsurely repeats, before she sees Audrey open her eyes and smile again.

"Very nice," Audrey's father notes, "although I probably would have added a wellness prayer with everything that's happened."

Aurora looks over at Mal, "How are you doing today?"

"Well, I have a headache and I'm still tired," Mal timidly replies, "but I'll be fine."

She nods, "I'm glad to hear that."

Ben inquires, "Did you decide whether you wanted to press charges or not?"

"Yeah," Mal frowns.

"And?" he prompts.

She looks at him, "I survived. Let's move on."

He hesitates, "You're sure about that?"

"The police probably wouldn't believe me anyway," Mal glances down. "I'm just the fairy dragon hybrid who is the daughter of what they thought was a magic using cannibal." She forks through the smashed potatoes, "And if I were to die, they would never have to worry about that kind of thing ever again. Because, I am the last of my kind, and that guy was just doing humanity the generous favor of ridding the world of my inherent evil." She sets the fork down and places her hand to her head.

After a second of silence Audrey reassures, "I'm sure the police wouldn't think that."

Mal mumbles, "You have too much faith."

"No, actually," Audrey sternly counters. "I think you just don't have enough."

Mal furrows her eyebrows and whispers, "What?"

"Think about it," Audrey instructs. "After everything you've been through, and you're still alive. Okay? You survived the island prison, you survived your mother's uprising when you nobly fought against her, and now you're saying you've survived being poisoned time and time again?"

She slightly shakes her head, "So?"

"So," Audrey emphasizes, "don't you see? You survived great peril. You're alive." Mal laughs through a breath. "I'm serious. You're here, because God wants you here. You're worth something. He has plans for you."

Mal grins in stress, "You think God has plans for me?"

"Well," Audrey hesitates, "yeah."

"What about me being here?" Mal asserts. "Do you think it was God's plan for me to be here?" She intensely looks into her eyes, "Tell me. Was it His fault that I hurt you, that we needed a truce in the first place for me to even be here?"

Audrey frowns, "God works in mysterious ways." and then Mal lets out a loud breath. "If what you tried to do to me lead us here so that we could talk and I could help you, then I feel like that sacrifice may have been worth it."

Mal looks over the table, "Where'd that wine go?"

"Mal," Ben begins.

"No," she interrupts, before she turns back to Audrey. "You are right about something. My life has been hell, but you know what? This God you believe in, I can't believe that divine, all-merciful person could exist and let me suffer from the time I was born." She half laughs, "Because, why? What, just because I'm a hybrid— some demon from your book— I had to be punished? And if so, what makes me so special, huh? Why am I still alive?"

Audrey sees the tears in Mal's eyes, and she lets out a sad breath, "Maybe… Maybe you're meant to help people." She takes her hand, "Maybe you're here, because if I help you, then that means you can help others."

Mal takes her hand away from hers, "And what makes you think I need help?"

"You're powerful enough to help people," Audrey bypasses. "You really should."

She huffs, "You're kidding, right? I can't even help myself." as she runs her nails through her tangled, curly hair. "I can't focus on pointless school work. I can't find meaning in anything. Hell, I can't even make my own body heat." Her mouth gapes and her eyes widen, before she meets Ben's, "It hasn't been twenty-four hours yet, has it?"

"Merde," Ben remembers, before he turns to his mother. "Mom. The thermometer."

"Right," Belle recalls, before she takes it out of her small purse and hands it to Mal.

"What's going on?" Audrey asks, as she watches Mal press the button and place the thermometer into her mouth.

"Don't you remember the court's conditions?" Ben stressfully counters. Audrey stays silent, merely looking at him, and then he wets his lips, "She's required to take her temperature twice a day or she'll get put in prison."

Audrey makes a noise, "But if she just missed one—"

"Then that means she isn't trying," Ben frustrates. "It means she won't be able to recognize when she needs heat, and then she'll hurt someone else." He sighs, "Or, at least, that's what they will assume."

The thermometer beeps and Mal reads the number, "Ninety-six point four." before she hands the thermometer back to Belle. "I'll write it in the notebook when we get back."

"Ninety-six degrees?" Aurora worries. "Isn't that low?"

"It's been lower," Mal frowns.

"But it can be higher," Ben frowns in return. "It should be higher."

Mal furrows her brows at him, "Well, I'm sorry. I was a little busy getting poisoned, and I didn't exactly see you offering yourself up to me."

Ben makes a noise, "All you have to do is ask. You know that."

Mal silences, and it's tensely quiet for a moment before Belle reasons, "We can solve this later. How about we just finish lunch?" She attempts to smile at Audrey's family, "And then we can get out of your hair."

"Sounds like a great idea," Leah agrees, before everyone uncomfortably continues the meal."

"Oh, Mal," Audrey calls after her, as Ben's family begins to exit out to the car. She hugs her, "I'm so glad I caught you in time." but Mal keeps her arms up.

She fights the urge to defend herself, "What's this about?"

Audrey lets go of her, "It's later."

When Mal glances back at Ben, Audrey smiles in reassurance, "Can I steal her for a minute? I need her help for something."

Ben gives an unsure look, "I suppose you can."

"Goodie," Audrey grins, before she pulls Mal across the foyer, down the hall, and into a private room. "How are you?"

"Feeling a little weirded out right now," Mal intensely expresses to her.

Audrey swipes some hair behind an ear, "Okay. Look." and she's quiet for a moment. "I just… I need to know that you're okay, before I let you leave."

"Before you let me leave?"

"Yes." She hesitates, "You see… I love Ben. I do, but there's these things about him— and I know it could have been my fault. I'm a very proactive person, and our personalities could have just clashed. I know that, but... there were just these things— and I just really need to know that you know and that it hasn't happened, that you're okay."

Mal's mouth gapes, "Audrey. What's going on here?"

She laughs through a tense grin, "You know, it's just that… I know he would never want to hurt anyone in any way." Mal gives a cautious look. "But, there were just these times when— when he would ignore me or be all passive aggressively defensive— I could tell something was wrong, you know, but he just wouldn't let me in, and…" She breathes, "It just, uh, left me feeling a little devalued, I guess, you know?"

Mal slowly shakes her head, "No. I don't." as she can see the glossiness in Audrey's dark eyes. "But I don't really, uh, pressure Ben to talk about his life or feelings or anything, so…"

"But you do know there is something, don't you? Something that he's been hiding?"

Mal pauses to think, "Everyone has something to hide." before she addresses the other things. "And, yeah, Ben can get busy. I'm not always on his mind, but most of the time he just really wants to talk about me. He likes to talk about me and help me. He's not really the kind of person who likes to talk about their own drama."

"And, what? You're not curious?" Audrey wonders, but Mal stays silent. "Can't you sense that he's keeping his guard up, pushing you away?"

"I have guards too," Mal easily states, before she takes a step forward. "And Audrey, you need to know that the reason why I haven't pressured Ben to talk about himself is because on the Isle we learn not to talk about ourselves. We learn not to ask other people about their lives."

She slightly shakes her head, "Why?"

Mal partly smiles, "Because it makes things worse. Because you just really don't want to know what's actually happening." Mal glances down, "It's his life. He knows how to handle it. I don't, and there's no point in me knowing about it if I can't do anything about it." She looks off, "And, you know, if he wants to talk about it, then he will." before she shakes her head. "But I'm not going to force him to talk about something that he doesn't want to talk about."

"I'm telling you something has been wrong with him," Audrey urges. "Don't you want to know what it is so that you can help him?" Mal opens her mouth to speak, but Audrey doesn't let her, "He likes you. You make him happy. You can get him to tell you. I know you can."

"Audrey," Mal shuts her eyes in frustration.

"You can get the information I never could. He responds to you."

"Audrey," she shouts, and then she sees Audrey become still with shock. "Ben's king. He's a—" She lets the breath out. "I'm sure he has a lot of problems, but just think about it. Think about the most stressful, time-filling thing you can imagine." Mal pauses, "Ben is a busy person, probably more busy than anyone knows. Do you really want me to bother him about his life and his problems the minute he's able to get away from them?"

"I just want to help him," Audrey whispers as tears fill her eyes.

Mal hesitates, "He'll ask for help if he really needs it." before she moves past Audrey.

"Did you ever ask for help?" she counters.

Mal halts, her hand on the doorknob, "Yes." as images of her talk with Uma flash through her mind. "No one cared enough to bother."

When Mal steps into the car Ben's parents glance at her as he questions, "What did Audrey want?"

Mal takes a seat across from Ben, "She wanted to know if I was okay."

"Because of the poison," he assumes.

"No." Mal stares into his hazel eyes, and then his frown deepens with concern.

"Mal?" His voice had been sad, panged; however, she still doesn't speak. He uncomfortably laughs, "Look" before he wets his lips. "Whatever she said—"

"It isn't true?" Mal finishes, and then Ben frowns again. "I get that some things are private, that some things just can't be talked about, but…" Mal shakes her head, "Ben. She was practically crying. What did you do to her?"

Ben makes a noise, failing to speak, before his mother prompts, "Honey?"

Ben squeezes his hands together, "Well, ah." before he purses his lips. "What did she tell you, exactly?"

Mal tilts her head, "She said you could get passive aggressively defensive." before she slightly nods. "That there were times when you completely ignored her." Ben's eyes move away, his mouth cracked open as he runs his tongue over his sharp molars, before he turns his head towards the window and observes the castle. "Ben," Mal irritably responds, and then he looks back at her and sighs. "I get that Audrey is a fragile girl who's biggest problem is probably figuring out what to wear in the morning, but even she has to have a reason to cry."

He eyes the floor, before he takes in a deep breath, looks back up, and admits, "I did have a tendency of getting defensive with Audrey." He glances down, wetting his lips, before he faces Mal again, "And, uh, one of my more common defenses was…" His eyes shift as he takes a shaky breath, "It was to say that because she believes in God, that causes her to be stupid and make up problems that don't exist."

"Ben," his mother exasperates.

"I know." He doesn't dare look at her, "Audrey's faith is very important to her—"

"So, you used it against her?" Mal disbelieves. "What happened to being respectful of people's religions and not being blatant about your beliefs?"

When Ben doesn't speak his mother instructs, "You need to go back in and apologize."

Ben sighs, shaking his head, "Honestly, Mother." before he meets her warm brown eyes, now filled with sorrow. "I don't think she would really want me to."

She shuts her eyes for a moment, "I thought I raised you better than this."

"Like Father has never done anything like this before," Ben frustrates in French. "You forgave him. You never complained to him."

His mother gives him a look, "That's uncalled for."

"What?" Mal darts her eyes between the two of them. "What did he say?"

She sighs and continues in French, "I knew the kind of problems I would have to help your father through when I married him. We expected better of you." Ben doesn't speak, so she switches to English, "Honestly. I thought I taught you to respect women."

"You did," he quickly reassures.

"Then what happened?" she loudly questions.

"I don't know," Ben shouts, and he feels his eyes become moist as he lets out a long breath. "It was just hard, okay? It got too hard."

"Yes, well," his mother's eyes shift, "things get hard sometimes, don't they?" Ben opens his mouth to speak, but then she presses the com button. "Travis. We can leave now."

Ben watches as she picks up her novel and opens it, "Mother." but she just stares into it. He looks at her for a moment: how her eyelids hide her irises as she tentatively reads and how her manicured nails turn the page; however, when he catches her sweet scent he turns away from her and stares out the window. He feels his eyes fill with tears as he notices his reflection in the tinted glass, and he can still smell her. He can't ignore it, each intake of breath more shaky than the one before. He's betrayed her, and she may never forgive him.

"I just need to know," Mal hesitates, "that you won't get defensive like that with me. If you don't want to talk about something, just say so." She sees the tear fall down his face, "You don't need to push me away… and… if you ever feel like talking, you can."

"Thank you," Ben manages, and when he wipes the tear away he feels just how hot his face has become. He pats the tic-tac case in his pocket; however, he knows he can't take the medicine right now, not with his girlfriend sitting just across from him to see.

"So?" Mal softly asks.

"So?" Ben repeats.

She pauses, "You won't do it to me."

Ben's quiet for a moment, as he tries to get a grip of himself, so afraid that if he says more than just a few words that his voice will crackle and his mother will hear. He tries to steady his breathing, "If it happens, let me know and we can figure it out." He stares at his reflection, "But I would hope I've learned my lesson." He breathes deeply, taking in the calming scent, before he leans his head against the cool glass, shuts his eyes, and drifts asleep.

- Any opinions or questions? These were two long chapters. I would really like to read some comments on them. Theories are good too, if you have any.

-Next Up: Mal's therapy session and Carlos gets tested. There may or may not be a family dinner at Ben's beforehand, as it is Sunday... with the drama that happened in this chapter it's likely.