Luckiest Bastard on Earth

(Tuesday Night)

"We are so good at this," Chad smiles. "This should be like a permanent thing."

"It's not, Chad," Ben slowly reminds him.

"Well, yeah," he laughs it off. "I just mean, it would be great if it could be." He leans forward to see Ben's expression, "Don't you think?"

"I think," Ben stares at the computer screen, "we need to get this finished."

"You know, I was actually thinking," Chad continues on, "that we should have dinner."

Ben gives him a look, "We just had dinner."

"No. I mean, like," he grins, "another night. Maybe with a movie before it or something."

"And why would we be doing that?"

"Come on." Chad excuses, "With everything you've been through lately, don't you think you deserve a night out?"

"I," Ben unsurely begins.

"Awesome," he interrupts. "Where's your phone?"

Ben's mouth gapes as he watches Chad take his phone, "Hey. I haven't said yes to anything yet."

"But you were going to," Chad smiles, before his eyebrows raise. "Woah. How long have you had this for?"

"What? The phone?" Ben asks in confusion.

"No, man. The photo." His laughs, "Is this your mother?"

Ben moves to see what Chad's looking at, and then he sighs at the sight of the background, "Right. Uh, I don't know. I found it on an old flash drive. I think it's from a birthday I had before… You know, before when my parents thought they could not teach me English and keep people away from me."

Chad furrows his brows at him, "That doesn't explain why you have a half-naked picture of your own mother set as your phone's background."

"She's in a bikini," Ben disputes.

"Just what I said," Chad proves his point. "Half-naked."

"Would you shut up?" Ben defends. "It's not like I'm jacking off to it."

"Does she know you have it?" he questions, and when Ben fails to respond Chad's smile widens. "She doesn't, does she?"

"Fuck off," Ben counters as he snatches his phone back from Chad, and he hurriedly swipes through it. "You're looking for my calendar, right?" He hands the phone back to him, "Here you go."

Chad looks at it, "Dude. Your schedule is like completely empty."

"It doesn't mean I'm not busy," he lets him know.

Chad thinks for a moment, "How about Tuesday this next week?"

Ben watches him place the event, and he answers in irritation, "Doesn't matter. You've already made up my mind."

He hands him back the phone, "Come on. It will be fun. Like this, but more."

Ben notices his grin, "You think this is fun?"

"Well, yeah," Chad laughs. "I mean, I get to do it with you."

It takes a minute for Ben to comment, "Right." with narrowed eyes, before he turns back to the screen. He sighs, "Only twenty-two more emails to read."

"Okay," Carlos irritably comments, "you've been smiling way too much."

"Really?" Chad questions.

"Yeah," he states. "Even for you. What's up?"

Chad's grin widens, "I got a date with Ben."

"You got a what?" Carlos disbelieves.

"It's on Tuesday, and we're going to go out to a movie and then have dinner."

"Wait. Hold on," Carlos lifts a hand. "I thought you said Ben didn't like guys."

"I said he had a girlfriend," he counters. "A girlfriend who is probably cheating on him, and he's been going through rough stuff, so—"

"So you thought you would use his suffering to your advantage," Carlos disapproves.

"No," Chad slowly says with a raised forefinger. "I just figured why not give it a shot?"

"I can think of one," he rebuttals. "Mal."

"Mm, no," Chad disagrees. "Mal could make me bald and light my palace on fire. Nothing's ruining this for me."

"You don't think that getting cursed to sleep for a hundred years and then wake up after Ben's dead is going to ruin your plans to be with him?"

Chad frowns, "Look. Mal still has nothing to worry about. Either Ben will like me or he won't. If he does, great. If not… well."

"So, he doesn't know this is a date, then?" Carlos realizes.

"He doesn't need to know," Chad answers. "It's what we're doing that's important."

"But isn't this date kind of going to suck," he questions, "if you can't even kiss him or hold his hand?"

Chad smiles, "So, I'm going to take him to a scary movie, and then he will have to lean on me for comfort."

Carlos takes a moment, "Ben doesn't strike me as the type of person to scare easily."

"Then I'm just going to have to make it a super scary movie," he solves. "As far as everything else goes, we'll just have to see where it goes."

Carlos shakes his head, before he faces him, "Chad. I cannot cover for you this time. When Mal asks me what's up with this, she's not even going to give me one second to answer."

"That doesn't seem fair," he says in a quieter voice.

Carlos's eyes shift, "I think she's just good with expressions, like knowing when people are guilty or scared and stuff." There's a brief pause. "I'm going to ask you— for your own safety— that you don't trespass a dragon fairy hybrid like this."

"I'm not worried about Mal," Chad decides. "She wants to be good, to prove to Ben that she's good? Then the last thing she's going to do is repeat her mother's hundred year curse."

"Mal is a very creative person," he warns. "She can punish you without getting caught."

"And if she does," Chad continues on, "then you can step up for me."

"Me?" Carlos's eyebrows raise.

"Yes, you," he firmly confirms. "You're the one saying Mal is going to do something bad if I do this."

"Yes, but I said that so you wouldn't do it," he urgently explains.

"Doesn't matter," Chad bypasses. "You have no idea how long I've wanted this. No one—especially that villain's kid— is going to think they can just come here and take this from me. I'm going for it, whether you like it or not." Carlos fails to speak, and then Chad smiles again, "And you would not believe where Ben is taking me to dinner."

"Where?" Carlos unenthusiastically comments.

"Starlit Nights," he excites.

He shakes his head, "What's Starlit Nights?"

"Only thee best romantic restaurant in town," Chad grins. "Apparently it's like the only restaurant Ben's ever been to. Isn't that awesome?"

Carlos's mouth gapes, "You are the luckiest bastard on Earth." before he thinks. "Are you sure he doesn't know it's a date?"

"No," Chad confirms. "If he thought it was a date, then he would have complained more about how I was forcing him to go out."

It takes a minute for Carlos to respond, "So, who's paying for this?"

"Oh," Chad recalls. "I'm paying for the movie and he's paying for dinner."

"But you're the one that asked him out?" he makes sure.

"Yes."

"But you forced him into it?" Carlos's eyes narrow in unsureness.

It takes a moment for Chad to admit, "I'm a wuss at rejection. It's easier to just ask someone out and then say yes for them, and, like, not give them a chance to talk at all."

"And yet you're so great at consent."

Chad frowns, "Was that sarcasm?"

"No, um," Carlos hurriedly explains, "I just mean that you force people on dates, but you somehow are still good at getting consent for things… I guess, I'm just confused."

"Well, let me unconfuse you," Chad replies, before he hands Carlos thirty dollars.

Carlos smiles at him, "Luckiest bastard on Earth." before he takes the money. "How do you want me?"

"Let's actually try it on the bed this time," Chad suggests. "It took me forever to figure out how to get the stains out of the rug last time."

"Couldn't you just look that up?"

Chad's eyes shift, "I could have. I should have, but my first idea was to just ask on some ask website… I didn't really get the answers in the time I needed."

"So, what did you do?" Carlos asks.

"Nothing really," Chad informs. "Hayden saw it before I could, and he gave me the whole rundown of what to do. So…" He points, "The bed. I don't want to have to deal with that again." and with that Carlos turns around and walks over to it.

-Next Up: Mal steals money for alcohol, she talks to Ben, and Ben talks with his parents... You do know by now that whenever I say talk the characters do very little actual talking, right? The last time I said this Ben's father broke into his dorm... Feel free to leave any comments or predictions regarding the information given during the last chapters. Don't be shy... It's likely that you're in no way crazy for considering the possibilities. I hope you've enjoyed.