Okay here's a long chapter for you! please review review review!
Sherlock was hovering next morning in his cotton pajamas and blue silk robe John had bought for him. It was not anything unusual but he seemed to be trying to get John's attention but hesitating.
They had just finished breakfast and John had cleaned the dishes. Wiping his hands with a kitchen towel John looked at Sherlock intently.
"Out with it."
Sherlock was pacing in the living room. He stopped and looked at John pursing his lips.
"I need some money John." He said looking at him tentatively.
Why would he need money? Does he want to go out? For what? Would he come back if he did?
Sherlock read the apprehension in John's eyes.
"John." He said coming close. "I'll be here when you come back." He said emphasizing.
John swallowed and looked away. This was too much to ask of him. His frayed nerves couldn't take anymore. He couldn't leave the house knowing the man would go out with high chances of not returning. He just couldn't.
He heard a sigh from Sherlock and looked up. The man looked dejected.
"I can understand if you can't John. It's asking for too much. I haven't given you any reason to trust me and yet you did. It's fine." He said with a reassuring but melancholy smile and went to the sofa and flopped on it.
No, the man had not given him any reason to trust him that much. He had given many reasons to feel the contrary. He would definitely go out and never return. It was their date night and John would be left there alone thinking of what it would have been like. Broken. Abandoned. Again.
John continued with his daily chores and got ready to go out. Sherlock was still perched on the sofa, sulking. John went to him and put some notes on the table before him. Sherlock looked up in shock and opened his mouth to say something. John put a hand around his neck and pulled him in a half hug bending down on the sofa.
"Don't be late for date." He whispered into the man's ear and kissed his temple.
He left a goofily smiling Sherlock on the sofa with a heavy reluctant heart.
John knew that if Sherlock wanted to escape he would do that anyway, with or without money, with or without John being there. He won't be able to stop it. All he could do was to trust. That's precisely what he did. It didn't make things easy for him but then how could life be easy when you have a tumultuous love life with a Sherlock.
John could only hope against hope. Sherlock had refused a mobile so the only medium of communication with him was through the landline. After spending a giddy two hours John gave a call.
"Hello John."
The baritone answered on the third ring. Other times calls went to voice mail as Sherlock couldn't answer them. But somehow the man knew who could be calling today.
Always. John could feel the knowing smile on the other side.
"I was waiting for your call. Giddy?"
"A bit." John breathed.
"Me too."
"Is this your first date?" John asked trying to ease his anxiety.
"With the man I love. Yes."
John held his breath for a moment and tried to hold on to it.
"I'll meet you at six." He said eventually.
"I'll be waiting." The baritone purred.
"Sherlock?"
"Yes John?"
Please be there when I return. "I love you."
"Don't be late."
The line disconnected. John felt it was his lifeline.
John walked out of the hospital looking at the sulking sky. It would rain tonight. Unclear sky hung over his head with a promise but his unclear head and situation didn't promise him anything that he could expect stepping into 221B.
John felt a numbness which he mistook for calmness on his way back. His movements were unhurried, mind placid, eyes cold. He thought he wasn't expecting anything. Actually he was expecting the worst subconsciously. He dragged himself up the stairs, he didn't flinch opening the door. He stayed completely calm when he saw the light was off in the living area. He stood in the darkness resignedly.
"John."
The voice called from the bedroom doorway.
The only light illuminating the tall lean figure was coming from behind him. Sherlock was wearing the best shirt John had bought him. In a navy blue shirt with two buttons undone at the top showing creamy white skin and dark trousers, carefully careless hair and a smug smile Sherlock looked luminous.
John took in the sight for a long moment before slouching down on the sofa in the dark and releasing a breath.
It was getting extremely difficult to live in such apprehension and anxiety day by day. John felt very tired. John wanted to do something, anything to make that image a fixture right where it was.
As if to prove it impossible the figure moved. He came before John and leant over him. John's nostrils flared to get as much as possible of the elusive sent of the man. He was wearing John's cologne. Strangely that made John feel this man was his.
"I'm all yours." Whispered Sherlock.
For how long?
"Let's get going. I'm hungry." John said standing up abruptly and switching on the lights.
"Aren't you going to change?"
Sherlock asked an awestruck John who was in the middle of the thought that how this man's beauty changed with different lights. It was as fluid as water, changing colors with the sun.
"Yes. I should." John said giving Sherlock a wink.
He went into the bathroom to get fresh and soon walked out into the bedroom. He chose his comfortable black jeans, a plum coloured T shirt and a black swede jacket.
"I'm done." He said adjusting the coat collar and coming into the living space and halted seeing a very wide eyed Sherlock.
John stopped and smiled letting Sherlock have a good look at him. Sherlock's gaze went all over him admiringly making him proudly blush.
"Wherever we're going I'm going to enjoy a great view." Sherlock drawled.
"Okay, enough flirting." John said trying to hide his flush.
Sherlock gave him a lopsided grin and went to take his coat. John had bought him the same coat he wore every time they met.
"Let's go." Sherlock said offering John his hand.
"Good guess." Sherlock said looking around the cosily lit small Chinese restaurant.
"It wasn't." John said looking across the table at Sherlock.
Sherlock raised an eyebrow.
"Just luck." John clarified shrugging.
After their order arrived which Sherlock had took the liberty to place both got engrossed in it. Tasting and sharing from each other's plates, feeding each other occasionally and taking quick glances around to see if anyone saw. John recommending sauces and Sherlock arguing. Sherlock trying to grope John's hand and John being evasive. Sherlock licked his lips suggestively making John still and took the distraction to finally pin John's evasive hand down with his own.
"This is too good to be true." John said resignedly.
"But this is true." Sherlock pressed.
"For now." John looked into his lover's eyes imploringly.
Sherlock's face fell and he withdrew the hand. All the previous playfulness gone within the instant.
John grabbed Sherlock's retreating hand in time and met his eyes.
"Sorry. I don't want to spoil this evening." John said looking sad.
Sherlock gave him a faint smile and looked at him with pained eyes.
John squeezed his hand.
"It's okay John." Sherlock said quietly. Then something like determination flashed in his grey-blue eyes.
"I just want you to know that I would do anything to spend my life with you." He said solemnly.
"Thank you." Whispered John trying to judge the validity of that thought.
It started drizzling before they got out. Sherlock started coxing John to walk in the rain.
"You are not quite strong right now and a cold is the last thing I want you to get."
"It's just drizzling! It'll just wet my head!" Sherlock whined.
John looked sternly at him.
Sherlock huffed and resigned.
But he compensated by putting out his hand from the cab's window and smearing rain drops on John.
As John paid the cabbie Sherlock stood in front of the door shaking the still falling rain drops from his curls. As soon as John approached he grabbed him by the arm and pinned him to the door.
"What…"
John was cut short by plush soft lips capturing his in an overwhelming all-encompassing kiss. Little cold raindrops trickled down their noses and into the kiss. The kiss was like a warm orb in the cold night. It was comforting.
After a few moments of pure pleasure Sherlock withdrew to look at a dazed, flushed John with a smug grin.
"A kiss in the rain was due." He said reaching for the door knob behind John.