The Only One

(Day 145: Thursday Afternoon)

When Mal sits at the table Ben is at in the library he notices her folded arms but still attempts to smile, "Hey."

"So," Mal looks him over, "somehow letting me stick around after a movie is too hard for you, but you can spend all frickin' night with Chad where we had our first date."

His smile falters, "Mal."

She widens her eyes, "No. Seriously. First you take him to that restaurant, and now this?" before she laughs in disbelief. "What's next? You want to give him a ring too?"

"It's not like that," he reassures. "I just needed someone last night."

"And you couldn't come to me?"

Ben looks off for a minute before facing her, "No."

Mal leans back in the chair and huffs, "I don't believe this."

"I couldn't be with you," Ben stresses, "because… It's hard to say."

She shakes her head, "Just say it. Or I'll think the worst."

Ben wets his lips, "It's just… When we're together… you like us to be, like, together, and…" He shakes his head, "That's not what I needed last night." He watches her look down in thought, failing to speak. "Please. Trust me."

Mal faces him, "I want to trust you, but I don't believe you." before she pauses. "Chad's completely obsessed with you, and you're just letting it happen. What am I supposed to think?"

"You think I like Chad like the way I like you?" he quietly inquires.

"Assuming that you do like me, yeah," she softly responds.

Ben nods, before he reaches forward to take her hands, "Mal. You are the only one for me. You have to know that."

"I don't."

"Then let me prove it," he strongly answers before nodding. "Let me get some of those trick candles my parents used on you. I can prove you're the only one."

"You would do that?" Mal whispers.

Ben partly smiles, "For you, anything."

After Ben places the candles into the pumpkin pie he lights them, and Mal turns him towards her, "Are you sure you want to do this?"

"I need you to know that I'm not cheating on you," he finalizes.

"Yeah, but," she sighs. "Sometimes people can like people without even knowing it."

"And if that's the case you will know."

"The candles don't say who you like," Mal worries.

Ben places a hand to her face, "You can hypnotize me afterwards." before he turns, sitting in the chair before blowing out the candles.

Mal sits down, and she notices Ben's shock over the second flame, "Blow them out."

After two more blows Ben faces her, "I don't know who it is."

Mal frowns with a nod, "Well, I can think of three options." and he waits for her to give them. "Audrey?"

He shakes his head, "No. I mean, she looks nice, but we never really matched." before he meets her eyes. "I only really started dating her, because people thought we should."

"That waitress," Mal continues on.

"Bridget?" Ben disbelieves. "I don't even really know her."

Mal stares at him for a long moment, "Chad."

Ben looks down, using his hands to explain, "Chad and I, we have a strong… whatever." before he faces her. "But I don't think about having sex with him."

"Then who is it?" she irritably questions.

"I don't know," Ben quickly answers, before he slowly stresses, "I don't know."

Mal shakes her head, "You're a guy. Can't you just tell if you like someone?"

Ben's quiet for a minute, "If you're talking about what I think you're talking about, then no. It doesn't really work like that. It can happen if I'm looking at someone's beauty or not." His eyes shift down, "Maybe that changes. I don't know. But right now, the answer's no."

"So, you have absolutely no idea who it could be?" She notices Ben wet his lips, "What? What is it?"

He lets out a breath before facing her, "There is someone— someone I care about as much as I care about you— but the candles shouldn't have picked it up."

Mal shakes her head, "Why not?"

"Because," Ben widens his eyes, before he half laughs, "It's different."

"Different?" Mal inquires.

"My mother," he explains, before he shakes his head, "Maybe the candles can pick up on strong family things too."

"Ben," Mal gives him a serious look. "If they could pick up on strong family feelings, then I would have had another candle for Jay. We saved each other's lives more than once. He's always been there for me. If family was a thing, I would have had him for one."

He swallows, as he feels the tears intrude his eyes, "Mal… I don't know who else it could be. I don't love anyone else."

Mal steps forward, placing her hands to his face and looking him over once, before he glows her eyes and stares into his, "Be honest. Are you telling the truth?"

"Yes," Ben whispers, and she moves in to hug him.

She shuts her eyes for a moment, "Then it doesn't matter." Ben catches her smoky scent and tilts his head towards her neck, and his breathing steadies as he takes it in. He opens his mouth more, his teeth hurting with tension, and his stomach growls in gnawing pain; however, as Mal steps away he shuts his mouth, and he watches as she reads the back of the candle box. She hesitates before saying, "These candles were obviously spelled wrong." before she takes the used ones, place them inside the box, and goes to throw them into the trash. Ben stays silent, wanting nothing more than to believe her claim, and when she turns around she holds a bright smile on her face. "What are some stupid candles going to prove anyway?" She walks over and places her hands on his arms, "You love me. You care about me. That's all that matters."

Ben inhales, and her scent somehow feels more compelling than before, "Uh." He gulps before pressing on her shoulder, "I can't do this right now." and he notices her cautious look. "It's just, I'm hungry, and I can't think of what I should or shouldn't be doing."

Mal slowly nods, "Okay, then." before meeting his eyes. "You need some time. It's fine." She attempts one last smile, before she steps away from him; however, when she turns around it immediately slips, and she steals a final glance before exiting the dorm room.

"Do you really think he likes his mother like that?" Jay questions.

"I don't know what to think." She pours more wine into her glass, "All I know is that just the idea of it being a possibility got him upset."

Jay watches her take a drink, "So?"

"So," Mal continues, "I told him that there's nothing to worry about."

He makes a discontent noise, "Ben doesn't seem like the kind of guy to just let things drop. If he really told you this, then what's stopping him from trying to explain himself?"

"Because," she raises her eyebrows, "I told him the candles were broken. So, now he has no reason to believe he loves anyone like that other than me."

He watches her finish off the glass and pour another, "You're upset."

Mal coughs on her drink, "More like weirded out." before she gives Jay a look. "I mean, his mother— out of all people. How does that even happen?"

"Well," Jay hesitates, "you two are a lot alike."

"Like how?" she doubts.

"Well," he takes a sip from his own glass. "You're both smart, hold your ground… and you do kind of look like her."

"I look nothing like her."

Jay takes a moment to eye her over, "No. I think you do." Mal lets out a deep breath before going for her glass again. "Do you think this changes anything between you?"

"Chad," Mal loudly says. "Chad I was prepared for. All I had to do was get Ben to admit that he had feelings for him." She shakes her head, "I really don't know who I hate more as his, his crush. At least with his mom there's no competition, right? Like, she's happily married— or as happy as any two people can be, at least— and there's that whole…" She looks at Jay, "Is that illegal here? Do you know?" Jay shakes his head in unsureness. "Well. Anyway, it would be better if it's someone he can't even be with no matter what, but at the same time it would just be sooo easier to just sit him down and be like 'Hey. It's okay to like guys too. That's cool.'."

"Just so long as it isn't Chad," Jay inputs.

Mal raises a finger, "Exactly." before she finishes her drink. "You know, I don't know who the hell that candle was for. For all I know it could have been for that stupidly sweet waitress… who also looks a little like his mother." Mal places a hand to her head, before she lifts up the empty wine container, "I think I need another bottle."

"I have a better idea," Jay suggests, before he walks over to her and places his hands on her shoulders. "Why don't we get you to sleep? You can have Carlos's bed."

Mal stands from her chair, "I am so tired right now."

"I know," Jay partly smiles, before he guides her over to the bed. "But things will be better tomorrow."

Mal lays down before looking up at him, "You know how awkward it's going to be the next time I see Belle? 'Cause, not only did Ben tell me this, but the last time I talked to her she said she could get Ben to stop seeing me just by asking him, and he didn't say he wouldn't." Mal's eyes shift, "Thinking about it, it was manipulative as hell." before she pauses. "Do you think she knows?"

"Knows what?"

"That Ben probably likes her," she mumbles. "I mean, she has to, right?"

It takes a minute for Jay to say, "I don't know." before he notices Mal begin to shut her eyes. "I'll get you some milk in case you get thirsty."

"Thank you," she whispers.