Private

(Day 150: Tuesday Afternoon)

"How are you doing?" Fairy Godmother asks.

Ben narrow his eyes in suspicion as he slowly says, "Fine."

She sighs, "Ben." before she straightens the items on her desk. "I would like to hear your side of the story for what happened on the night of Audrey's sleepover."

Ben's eyes shift down, "Right." and she waits for him to continue. He meets her dark brown eyes, "Audrey. She invited Evie to this sleepover, just so she could lock Evie— or, uh, hold the door shut on Evie— while she was in the bathroom."

"And then what happened?"

"Evie came back to the dorm and told us what happened." He pauses in thought, "I… I went to see Audrey. To make sure it didn't happen again. I just wanted to talk, to reason with her. But." He looks off, "I lost it, I suppose." Ben faces her, "I was too close to the situation."

"Are you saying you lost it, because you're biased towards Mal and therefor Evie?"

"No," Ben immediately answers, but it takes a minute for him to think it through. "Audrey did what she did, because her mother was kept in a tower by a villain." He takes a deep breath, "But what she did, she recreated the situation of abuse of which Evie had suffered from for years prior to coming here." He looks down, "I understand both situations." before he frowns up at the headmistress. "And that's why I took it so personally. When Audrey and Ruby went through with their plan, it made them no better than the villains who put their parents in the towers in the first place."

"I thought it was only Audrey who was involved?"

He shakes his head in contemplation, "No. Audrey wouldn't have done this if it was only for herself. It was because other people had suffered too that she wanted… justice."

"Is that what you would call it?" the headmistress questions. "Justice?"

"No," he evenly answers. "But she would. She doesn't do bad things, not purposely."

It takes a long moment for Fairy Godmother to ask, "Do you remember exactly how you lost it with Audrey?"

Ben lets out a breath, "No." before he looks off. "When I get upset it's hard for me to remember what happened afterwards. I just know what happened, without details. I don't remember any words… or the order it happened in, even." She nods, and he looks at her before whispering, "Why am I here? We already discussed this."

"Yes," the headmistress agrees. "However, I haven't disciplined you for it yet."

"You said you didn't know what to do with me," he recalls.

"But now I do," she slightly nods before pausing. "It would do you well to get your emotions under control, whether provoked or not. As king, you need to be able to remember a situation, assess it, and learn so that you can do better next time."

"I had reason to be upset," he irritably defends.

"Like I said, whether provoked or not," she sternly says again, before she softly continues, "Now. Wolves are infamous for their aggression, but they are even more famous for how they've learned to harness their intense emotions."

"I'm not a werewolf," Ben points out.

"What you are," the headmistress reminds him, "is a young man in a very unstable, ever-changing environment, who is expected to uphold the weight of this country's rule." He looks down, and she continues, "What has happened was meant to be. Your father's anger and your mother's diplomacy brought the country together. But now, they need someone who can keep them together." He meets her eyes. "That will be easier if they know they have a steady, empathetic ruler to rely on." He lets out a breath, and she reassures, "You've given people hope. And that's a good thing."

"My parents have told me my entire life that I need to keep my emotions under control so that I won't get sick," Ben disbelieves as he feels the tears intrude his eyes, "and now you too are saying I shouldn't display them."

"I am not saying that at all," she staccatos. "I am saying you need to learn how to express your emotions in a healthy manner."

"I still don't understand."

It takes her a moment, "My punishment for you is for you to look up how wolves deal with their emotions, and I want you to write a report on it and bring me a copy so I know you have done so."

"I fail to see how this will help," he breathes.

"It will give you the tools you need," Fairy Godmother informs. "Not everything works for everyone. But the ones that will help you, you will learn how to use at your own leisure."

"And Audrey?" he inquires.

"I will speak with her," she promises.

"Thank you."

The headmistress nods, "You are very welcome."

When Ben notices Audrey walk into the kitchen he comments, "Hi."

Audrey looks over him, "Hi." before she cautiously walks towards him. She notices the large mixing bowl of cheesy potatoes and ham. "That's a lot of food." He puts down the fork, before she asks, "Is that a hybrid thing?"

He turns towards her, slightly shaking his head, "What do you mean?"

"That you're a hybrid," she explains. "Is that how you can eat so much?"

It takes Ben a long moment to say, "I'm not a hybrid."

"Ben," Audrey gives a look. "You told me. You can't just try to hide it now."

"When did I ever say that?" he doubts.

"Uh," Audrey nearly laughs, "how about when you charged into the girl's bathroom and threatened me to stop that petition?"

"Petition?"

"Yes," she asserts.

"What's a petition?"

Audrey places a hand to her head, "It's a paper that people put their names on to get a bill— or, uh, action— passed."

Ben hums in thought, "Threatened."

Audrey grits her teeth, "You know what happened. You were there."

"Could you slow down?" he interrupts.

She takes a deep breath, "You went after me into the girl's bathroom and told me to stop the petition, because you are a hybrid."

Ben thinks, "Are you sure I didn't just say that so Mal would be safe?"

"She was already outed," Audrey shouts.

"At a private school," Ben provides. "At the time her secret could've been private still."

"So, you don't know what petition or threatened is, but you know what private means," she angrily supplies.

"Yes," he simply says.

"You were anxious," she strongly defends. "You were a complete mess."

"Yeah," Ben accepts. "I'm a bad liar. When I lie it has to be truth. If it wasn't truth, then of course I was a mess."

Audrey lets out a breath as she looks down, but then she notices the large bowl and points to it, "What about that? How can you not be a hybrid if you eat that much?"

Ben stares down at it for a long moment, deeply frowning, "Because. I don't eat." He faces her and irritably says, "Because, I'm stupid and can't figure out how to normally."

"Ben," she sadly speaks.

"I have this stupid idea that I can catch up on eating," he enunciates. "That's why I eat like this. I'm not a fucking hybrid. It's a…" He looks down and mumbles, "Probably a frickin' eating disorder." He shakes his head and stands from the stool.

Audrey watches as he places the bowl in the fridge, "No. Don't. I'll leave." and he turns towards her. "I was just coming to grab some freeze-dried fruit anyway."

"I'm not in the mood anymore," Ben whispers. "I'll have it later. Cold."

"Aren't you at least going to put some plastic wrap on it?" He hears her desperateness, as she warns, "It will get crusty if you don't."

"Good." He eyes down, "Nice feels." before he glances over her, turns around, and slowly walks away.

"Is Ben or is Ben not a hybrid?" Audrey emotionally questions when Mal opens the door.

Mal notices a few people look over, and she makes a face, "Ben? No. Of course, not." before pulling her inside the dorm and shutting the door. She widens her eyes, "What were you thinking?" as she steps towards Audrey. "You really think Ben would've want that?"

"He just told me he wasn't," Audrey desperately informs. "He said he only said it so that he could keep you safe."

Mal raises her eyebrows at Evie, "He's really good at rationalizing things."

"Totally," she uncomfortably grins as she rubs her arm.

Mal looks Audrey up and down, "First off. Stop getting all teary." as she walks forward in unsureness. "Ben is a hybrid. He didn't lie for me."

"Then why did he say that?"

She takes a deep breath and places a hand on her shoulder, but when Audrey's eyes follow it Mal looks away and takes it off. "Sorry." She faces her, "Look. Ben was having a hard time comprehending being what he is, and so… he came to me to let him forget."

"You hypnotized him," Audrey realizes. "How could you do that to him?"

Mal looks back at Evie, "Did I not just tell her?" and after Evie offers a look Mal meets Audrey's eyes. "He asked me to. I didn't want to do it. He begged me to do it, practically threatened to kill himself if I didn't."

"That's abuse," Audrey frowns.

"He wanted the hypnotism," Mal asserts.

"No," she breathes. "Ben. What he did, threatening to kill himself if you didn't do this. That's abuse."

"Except that he would have done it," Mal denies. "He didn't do it out of malicious intent. He did it, because he needed me to know how hard it was for him." Mal sadly laughs, "You should have seen him. He couldn't even say it was him with the problem. He had to put himself in some story just to admit to it and ask for my help. He was nervous as hell."

"Why was he nervous?"

Mal looks off, "Probably because he knew I would have a problem with it." before she faces her again. "Because, if he's human and I'm still just some heat-sucking monster that could probably never be parasitic with only one person, then how could he ever care about me?" She feels the back of her eyes burn as she shakily breathes, "How could he and me ever really be together if I'm not the perfect, pretty princess he needs me to be?"

"Mal," Audrey sympathizes. "I know I've made fun of your hair before for being so… well, your hair." Mal gives her a look, and she quickly continues, "But you're not ugly. You are beautiful, and Ben knows that."

It takes a long moment for her to say, "Being beautiful still doesn't make me monogamous." and after glancing over Audrey's sad expression she slightly shakes her head. "Ben is like the hottest person I know, but…" She meets Audrey's dark eyes, "I'm still afraid I could kill him somehow, especially if he's the only one I'm allowed to take heat from."

Audrey frowns as she quietly questions, "Does he know about Lonnie?"

Mal shakes her head, "I have no frickin' clue." before she widens her eyes. "Where's Ben right now?"

"I don't know," Audrey unsurely responds. "Last I saw, he was in the kitchen. Why?"

"Doug still doesn't know," Mal urgently answers, before she bolts for the door.

After she leaves there's a long silence, Audrey and Evie staring at each other, before Audrey comments, "You left your overnight bag in my room. You should get it." Evie fails to speak, and she inquires, "Do you miss her? Your mother?" Evie's eyes shift down, her mouth slightly gaped, but no words come out. "You called out for her, for help. It must be so hard being so far away from her."

Their dark brown eyes meet, before Evie evenly replies, "What's hard is that she didn't leave me. Not really." She brings her fingertips to her temple, "She's still up here, whispering. And every single time I hear high heels or feel someone behind me, I fear it's her."

Audrey's quiet for moment, "If you don't mind me asking, what did she do to you?"

Evie stares at her, before she slowly states, "I lived with her for fifteen years. Nothing you can come up with could compare."

"I'm sorry," she whispers.

"Don't see why," Evie evenly responds. "You've only been fueling the propaganda against villain kids since before we even arrived here."

"I was wrong," she admits. "Ben was right. Your parents didn't make any exceptions with you, the way they've treated others." Evie doesn't speak, and after another minute of stares Audrey says, "I'll go get that bag for you." She moves towards the door, looking back and shaking her head at the lack of communication, before she exits the dorm.

At the sound of Mal's voice, Ben halts outside his dorm's door. He hears Doug urgently respond, "He's not human. We can't just pretend he is."

"He's better now," she expresses. "He's eating again. He's talking again. He's better."

"Come on, Mal," Doug mumbles. "Ben might have forgotten about being a hybrid, but he's still a carnivore. He's still going to have needs."

"Needs he's willing to satisfy now," Mal reminds him. There's a long silence, before he hears her continue, "Hey. He's going to be okay."

"You shouldn't have done this," he disagrees. "There's things you don't know."

"Like what?" she counters, and when Doug isn't able to say his sentence Ben can practically see him press his glasses up. "This won't be forever. He just can't handle the information right now. He needs to process it first, understand it before he's told."

"How long?" he loudly questions. "How long until we tell him?"

"We aren't," Mal sternly responds. "His parents are. When he's ready."

Doug takes a breath, "I don't like this."

"His parents have a plan," she reassures. "He will find out, and when he does it's going to be okay. He's going to be okay."

There's more quiet, "Even you don't believe that."

Mal grits her teeth, "Look. I told you. Do what you want, but if Ben finds out what he is and kills himself I'm coming after you."

"Don't worry," Doug quietly comments. "My lips are sealed."

"Good," Ben hears Mal assert, before the loud boots move towards him and the door swings open.

Mal looks at him in shock, before she eyes him in suspicion, "What did you hear?"

Ben awkwardly smiles, "Was I supposed to hear something?"

"No," her eyes shift.

"So, uh." He clears his throat, "What were you talking to Doug about?"

"I," Mal slowly begins, "told him Evie's starting to go to therapy for her eating disorder."

Ben nods, "Good." as his eyebrows rise and he exposes his teeth in a grin. "That's, eh, uh, good."

"You don't understand, do you?" Mal suspects, and he merely offers a guilty expression.

- Posted: 02/01/2019

- You know, I know I haven't been posting as much lately, but comments would still be very much appreciated.