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Naruto and Jiraiya began there search early the next morning.
"What can you tell me about this Tsunade?" Naruto asked "what are we searching for."
"Well she has the largest set of..."
"Information that's relevant" Naruto stated
"Fine" Jiraiya sulked "she is a Sannin like me and Orochimaru and is the granddaughter of the First Hokage." Jiraiya spoke "She is by far the greatest medic-nin in history and is considered the most powerful Kunoichi. She is already considered the strongest human, her strength makes even Gai's look like a weakling." Naruto felt a shudder of excitement, a strong opponent he thought no focus, she's not an enemy "She has a horrible drinking and gambling addiction, her luck is awful."
"It can't be that bad" Naruto stated "can it?"
"Her losing streak has earned her a title" Jiraiya said "it's the" he took a dramatic pose "LEGENDARY SUCKER!"
"...You're supposed to be a legendary Shinobi?" Naruto asked
"No respect" the Sannin mumbled "would you like to hear her other title."
"If it's anything like..."
"No no" Jiraiya waved it off "this one will catch your attention?"
"Well what is it?"
Jiraiya smirked "The Slug Princess"
Naruto gave Jiraiya a long blank stare through his blindfolds. After a simple minute he walked off toward their destination. Jiraiya barely heard Naruto mumbling to himself.
"A Hime huh?"
"Say Naruto" Jiraiya spoke "how would you like to sign the Toad contract?"
"No" Naruto answered
"I could teach you some Ninjutsu?" he tried What kid doesn't like flashy Jutsus
"No thank you" Naruto answered
"What?" Jiraiya couldn't believe what he was hearing "but I'm a Sannin, I could teach you Jutsus that would make Kakashi jealous."
"It's not that I don't like Ninjutsu" Naruto spoke "It's just that I'm a sole Gen and Kenjutsu user."
"But even the best in those fields use Ninjutsu" Jiraiya spoke "Look at the Seven swordsmen and even the greatest Genjutsu masters." he continued "There are also situations were power is just required."
"Yes I'm aware of that" Naruto admitted "that's why I have this." he gestured to his elemental sword "I can attack with all five elements when most have only one or two."
"And defense?" Jiraiya was sure he had him "How do you defend against a strong attack."
"Shouldn't I be able to rely on my partner?" Naruto asked
"Well yes" he agreed "but some attacks can't be blocked easily."
"If I can't over power it or hide from it then I take the hit"
"Are you crazy?" Jiraiya asked "Some of those attacks could kill a person on the spot."
"Yes" Naruto answered "I can however take a lot of punishment."
"But it's just Genjutsu..."
"The last person who insulted Genjutsu ended up eating maggots." Naruto warned
Neither of them had anything else to say to the other so it was a quiet trip. They were moving through some town when they decided to find a hotel.
"Hello sir" a lady spoke "are you Jiraiya of the Sannin?"
"...Maybe" he answered the lovely lady "who are you?"
"I'm a fan of your work" she spoke with a blush "I must say that I love..."
"Lies" he shouted, he had a low trust on women after the hot spring incident "drop you disguise monster." he never did find out they were illusions "I will not be bested a second time."
Needless to say things got real stupid real fast. Lucky for Naruto he decided to go and get a room. He left the Sannin to his punishment.
-KNOCK KNOCK-
Naruto had felt two powerful Chakra signatures at the door. One was greater than his without his fear and Kyuubi.
Needless to say he had to open the door.
On the other side were two figures in black cloaks with red clouds. One was Kisame, a rogue member of the Seven swordsmen of the mist. The other was Itachi, older brother to Sasuke and the killer of their clan.
"Yes" Naruto asked "Can I help you two?"
"Naruto Uzumaki" Itachi spoke "you will come with us."
"I need an adult!" Naruto shouted "I NEED AN ADULT!"
"We are adults" All eyes turned to Kisame "what, we are."
Naruto closed the door in their faces, he didn't lock it. He had a good reason for not doing so.
When the two opened the door they were greeted with a horrible sight.
Gai and Lee.
Overweight.
Sunset.
Overweight.
Lingerie.
Overweight.
Men hugging.
Needless to say Itachi closed the door.
"I did not need to see that" Itachi spoke
"Hey, is it getting hot in here?" Kisame asked earning a look from Itachi "What, oh don't look at me like..."
He was cut off by a large explosion of flame from the other side of the room. They were able to avoid it at the last moment without any burns.
Naruto took a swing with his elemental sword and unleashed a torrent of lighting. Kisame stepped forward and unsheathed his own sword. The lighting hit full force and began to dissipate.
"My sword eats Chakra" Kisame bragged "your attack is useless."
Naruto cut the stream and ran forward, Kisame followed suit. Their blades collided and Naruto instantly had regrets. He hadn't crossed blades with a sword this naturally heavy since Zabuza. You could only imagine the extra weight Kisame was adding.
Jumping back, he drew the Kusanagi and took a stance.
Dance of the Poisoned snake
The move was precise and perfect, as always. Unfortunately for Naruto, his opponent was a S-Rank ninja. Un-like Orochimaru, this one actually specialized in Kenjutsu. Kisame merely side stepped the blows as if they weren't there. The best Naruto was able to do was put a scratch on his face.
"ITACHI" a pain the butt called "I'm here to kill you"
Chidori
The younger Uchiha charged forward with the intent to kill. The elder simply grabbed him by the wrist and directed the blow to the wall. Naruto had to admit, the crater was impressive.
The explosions began to draw a lot of attention from citizens. Many started leaving their rooms to see the cause of the commotion. This would make it difficult for Naruto to fight.
"Alright Itachi" Naruto spoke "how about we do this in a Genjutsu duel."
"...I'm listening"
"If you win, then I come with you" he offer "and if I win, then you two take Sakura Haruno in my place."
"Did you say... Haruno?" Itachi asked
"Ye..."
"HELL NO!"
"...Please"
"No" Itachi spoke "how about we just leave you alone."
"Fine"
A poof of smoke appeared and Jiraiya appeared on a giant toad. His pose was so ridiculous the toad looked embarrassed.
"IT IS I, JIRAIYA OF THE..."
"Shut up" Naruto ordered "I have it under control."
Naruto began undoing his blindfold as Itachi's Sharingan began to change.
"Since I was the one challenged by you two, I choose the battlefield." Naruto spoke "I assert reality"
"What's the game?" asked Itachi "and the rules?"
"First to hesitate or fails to come up with an idea" Naruto spoke "loses"
The whole area began to change as the two Shinobi activated their Genjutsu to the fullest. Reality really did shift and change under the skill of the two Genjutsu masters. Even the civilians and other Shinobi were drawn into the world of illusions.
They became nothing and everything, the power of illusion.
WARNING
THE BATTLE ISN'T MUCH OF A BATTLE, IT'S JUST ONE UPPING SO NO WHINING ABOUT IT, I'LL MAKE IT UP NEXT CHAPTER.
Naruto made the first move.
"I am the dire wolf." he spoke "A prey-stalking lethal prowler."
Reality began to take form, a dire wolf came forward from nothing. It began to growl an snarl as it lunged toward Itachi, fangs bare.
"I am a hunter" Itachi spoke "horse-mounted and wolf-stabbing"
A hunter wielding a large spear appeared from nowhere. Just as Itachi described, the hunter was on top of a large horse.
Naruto felt the spear pierce him. Had any of it been real the blow would have been lethal.
"I am the horse-fly" Naruto spoke "horse-stinging and hunter throwing."
-Konoha-
Shino Aburame almost cracked a smile. He knew somewhere someone was using an insect for something other than insult.
Itachi felt the fly bite him as if he were the horse. He also felt the unseen ground as the hunter was tossed.
"I am the spider" Itachi spoke "fly consuming and eight legged."
Naruto felt himself wrapped in the hungry spider's merciless web. From the shadows the large arachnid made it's was down the webs. He felt as the fangs pierced him and drain his blood.
-Konoha-
Shino lost his almost smile.
"I am the snake" Naruto spoke "spider-devouring and poisoned tooth."
The snake swallowed the spider in one gulp. Naruto knew from experience what that was like. He actually took a little pleasure as the insect squirmed for its freedom.
"I am the ox" Itachi groaned "snake crushing and heavy footed."
Heavy footed is right Naruto could feel himself crushed under the beast Time to take this up a notch.
"I am disease" Naruto spoke "plague causing and warm life destroying."
The ox body of Itachi began to rot away.
For a second, a minor second, Itachi showed an emotion, fear. Not at the challenge but at the choice. So I struck a nerve he decided to act as if Itachi hadn't hesitated.
"I am a world" Itachi spoke "life nurturing."
This caught many off guard, especially Sasuke. Itachi Uchiha, nurturing.
"I am a nova" Naruto spoke "all destroying and planet cremating."
Itachi felt as he was burned to nothing but was never even touched.
"I am the beyond" Itachi spoke "passed the stars and life embracing."
Time to end this
"I am the Anti-life" Naruto spoke "the beast at the end that will consume all" Naruto stepped forward "Even you Itachi, but disease is already working on that."
Itachi jumped back and broke the illusion, he lost.
"Itachi" Kisame called "what happened, you never lose in Genjutsu."
"... He caught me by surprise." Itachi spoke
"Well let's grab the brat and go."
Kisame took a swing at Naruto and cut through his legs.
Izanagi
Naruto appeared unharmed.
Itachi was caught by surprise at what he had saw. Naruto had used an Uchiha only technique, capable only by the Sharingan.
Or so he thought.
Man Naruto thought Even with my fear that sword took a huge chunk out of my reserves.
"Let's go Kisame" Itachi ordered "we're leaving."
"But..."
"Now" his tone brokered no argument, he turned to Naruto "before we leave... what beats the Anti-life?" he had to know
Naruto couldn't help but smirk when he answered "Hope"
Itachi gave a nod of understanding before leaving. Neither Naruto nor Jiraiya tried to follow them.
"Well that was..."
"Dobe" Sasuke growled "how did you make Itachi retreat?"
"I used the technique I learned in this scroll" he held out a blue scroll "It..."
Sasuke snatched and immediately tore it open to read.
Dear Teme
You deserve this
DODGE
Pink paint launched itself unto Sasuke's forehead in small letter. It read
I love pink haired and big fore-headed girls.
"Wha-"
He never finished as Naruto punched him unconscious.
"Naruto" Jiraiya spoke "was that..."
Dynamic Entry
Jiraiya felt a powerful kick land on his face.
"Hello Gai-Sensei" Naruto greeted "I need a favor."
"What can I do for such a youthful friend of mine?" Unlike Tenten, Gai didn't resent Naruto for what happened to Neji "If I can not do it then I..."
"Well" Naruto spoke cutting him off "I need you to unclothe Sasuke-Teme and leave him in front of his fan-girls."
"Consider it done" Gai spoke
"...That's it?" Naruto asked "Your not going to complain or ask anything on stripping an underage boy?"
"It's not my first time" Gai admitted "how do you think Lee and Neji get patched up after Tenten has a fit?"
So true Tenten held nothing back with her babies as she called them.
"Thank you Sensei" Naruto spoke "here's a tortoise, to go with Lee's turtle." he handed it over "Careful now" Naruto warned "Lee's is male so don't leave them alone."
"You carry tortoises with you?" Jiraiya asked
"I will keep them from breeding" Gai shouted ignoring Jiraiya "and if I cannot, then I will train the babies to be youthful."
"Now" Naruto stated "let's go find us a female Sannin."
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I KNOW SHORT, BUT IT GETS BETTER.