A/N: Thank you for all your reviews! You are all so sweet and encouraging, and they always make my day :)
Guys, I have been so excited to write this chapter, and it made my sister squeal with delight, so I think you'll all like it!
"The bad news," Hermione says, matter-of-factly, "is that the trigger words that tie you to the will of whomever speaks them, are actually part of a complex variation of the Imperius Curse, and I don't know how to untangle it."
The Imperius Curse, he gathers from the very long-winded and technical explanation that follows, is basically mind control, but somehow, Hydra must have found a Dark wizard (or witch, Hermione allows, generously) to craft a version of the curse that could be activated by recitation of specific words in a specific order.
There are very distinct marks left behind by the Imperius, she says, a bit distantly, and James doesn't ask how she knows that, because it's clear that it's personal, but he remembers what Luna said, about the war in the wizarding world, and he shivers.
He's also been Obliviated several times, Hermione continues, and she thinks that the chair they'd put him in had some kind of spell on it that had allowed it to mask his memories, too.
"There's no muggle machine I know of that can remove memories like that," she says. "Quite a lot of magic has gone through your head. I'm surprised your brain isn't a vegetable."
James isn't totally convinced it isn't already a vegetable.
The good news, once Hermione finally gets around to it after all that, is that she can help him regain some of the memories that had been wiped.
Not all of them, however, she is careful to specify. He can't get everything back, she explains, because obliviation always leaves irreparable scars.
Maybe it's odd, but James is okay with that. Anything is better than what he's got right now. And if he can't get everything back, well, maybe it's not such a bad thing. If his nightmares, and today's little foray into his brain are anything to go by, there's a lot of stuff that happened with Hydra that he really has no inclination to remember.
"And we'll need a Curse-breaker to take a look at you, too," Hermione is saying.
"Bill?" Luna asks, and Hermione agrees. James tenses at the mention of another person rooting around in his head, but Luna smiles encouragingly. "I think you'll like him, James."
And so that is that. He can't decide whether it is a good or a bad thing that he seems to give in so easily to whatever Luna says. He goes with good, for now.
Hermione and Luna are chatting, making plans. He hears something about Bill, and Africa, but he's not really listening.
He doesn't move from his spot on the couch, all at once feeling a bit out of place. He's in a bit of a daze. His head, overwhelmed by the invasion of his mind and everything else he'd learned, had started to pound at some point. He's not moving, but the world moves around him dizzily.
"James," Luna's voice filters into his awareness. "Breathe, James. You're alright." She's rubbing his arm, up and down. The contact gives him something to hold on to.
He breathes, in and out. Luna's eyes watch him, big with concern.
"Whenever you're ready," she murmurs softly. James slumps down, resting his head on the back of the sofa. Belatedly, he notices that Hermione has left. He pushes down the part of him that wants to berate himself for his lack of vigilance, and closes his eyes.
"I'm… afraid," he says slowly. "What if… I'm not-I don't know… who I was."
It isn't that he doesn't want his memories back, it was just that he's spent quite a bit of time without them now, and he's afraid he'll be different when he does get them.
"Oh, James," she says quietly. She links her fingers into his. "Who you were won't change who you've made yourself to be."
"How can you be sure?"
"You've worked too hard to get where you are," she says, simply. "Are you happy right now?"
It's an odd question. James looks up at the ceiling, eyes tracing swirls of paint, and thinks for a moment. "I… I think so."
"Well, then. There you are."
James stares at her. She makes it sound so easy.
Maybe it is.
A week and a half later, he and Luna hop in her fireplace, and emerge from the green flames into a huge, lavish room. They're somewhere called Wakanda, where they have the best, smartest wizards and scientists working together, and Bill, apparently, is one of those.
A red-haired man, who must be Bill, is there to greet them, along with Hermione, and a young girl that James doesn't recognize.
Luna skips forward and hugs Bill enthusiastically. He smiles, returning the hug, and James feels something, like a little twist, in his stomach, as he watches the display of affection. He's not sure why, and he forcefully shakes off the feeling as he steps forward to meet Bill.
He wasn't sure what he was expecting, but for whatever reason, the scars on the man's face make him feel a little more at ease about this. Maybe because the scars tell him he won't see any judgement from him. It's not just his face, though. Bill's clearly not some namby-pamby. He's soft-spoken, but his handshake is firm, and he barely even blinks at the metal arm.
(Hermione, however, is staring at it with an expression bordering on disbelief, probably because Luna gave it a paint job yesterday, covering every inch in bright colors, and tiny flowers. Luna did something with her wand, too, so the paint wasn't chipping off when the plates of the arm move. James loves it.)
Bill introduces the girl as Shuri, the princess of Wakanda. Despite the fact that she's not wearing a dress, Luna gives a graceful curtsy. James awkwardly attempts a bow.
"Oh, no, we don't do that here," Shuri laughs, not unkindly. "But may I say, I admire the detail work on your arm."
James has no idea what to do with the compliment.
"Thank you," Luna says, answering for him. James attempts a smile. Shuri dimples back at him, and he feels marginally successful.
"You should smile more often," Luna says, nudging him with her shoulder as they are being led down the hall to their rooms. "It suits you."
He grins widely at Luna, because he wants to. She laughs delightedly, and it fills the hallway and his heart warmly.
He drinks it in until he can't take it anymore, and looks away. Bill's assessing eye catches his as he does, and James feels like he's been caught red-handed. What he's been caught doing, he's not sure.
After a moment where James genuinely fears for his life, Bill's expression shifts into one of amusement, and he gives James a nod, before facing forward again.
He has no clue what exactly just happened, and likely would have spent the next hour wondering over it, but Luna chooses that moment to slide her fingers into his metal ones. At his startled glance, she smiles up at him serenely, and he forgets the odd interaction in favor of this new, happy feeling.
He smiles again.