Explanation
"When I was six the worst think I ever did was stop believing in the tooth fairy, when I was ten the worst thing I did was tell Auggie that the tooth fairy doesn't exist. Now I'm fourteen and wondering if the worst thing I've ever done is telling you guys the truth." I glanced toward Auggie who wore a knowing expression on his face. He had perched himself on the arm rest of the couch giving me an encouraging smirk. Steeling my nerves I responded to his silent motivation with a nod. "You think I'm a goofy klutz who barely understands the world- that's not true,"
Mom nervously looked at dad searching his face for some answers. "Riley, we just want to know why your so- not you," she said struggling to find the right words.
_#_
"Go away," she mumbled as soon as her eyes landed on me. She tucked a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear before leaning against the head board of her bed. She completely ignored my being there after she uttered her harsh command. I awkwardly shifted from one foot to the other not quite sure of how I was to approach her. This Maya was not mine anymore and for the the first time in a while I didn't know how to- just talk to her. I watched as her hands worked, sketching away in her sketching pad like it was the only thing keeping her sane. The erratic strokes she made completely contradicted the calm expression she wore.
"Maya, you haven't been at school-"
"Leave me alone."
I flinched at how cold her voice was, she obviously wasn't giving me a chance to do what I did best. I looked around my surrounding nervously as this was another first for me. -going with the flow, accepting the anger directed at me instead of trying to direct it somewhere else, it was a first time in a long while I felt...
"What are you still doing here Mathews?" Her pencil stopped moving and the edge in her voice snapped me out of my own worrying - confusing thoughts.
"I-I wanted to see you," I started, allowing some truth to slowly leave my lips. It tasted strange on the tongue.
She scoffed, and that hurt. Her eyes slowly lifted from the sketch pad to my face. Her blue eyes staring at me incredulously. "It's taking everything I have in me to not hurt you right now,"
On instinct I stepped back and for a slight second I saw hurt no betrayal flash across her face. She instantly got up and stood right in front of me. She stared me down before grabbing the front of my shirt. Her grip was loose, but still intimidating. I blinked at her surprised by the sudden turn of events. "What, is this scary? Am I scary? Is that why you-"
"What?" I mumbled when she wouldn't finish.
"Is that why you gave up on me!" she slowly backed away from me as her eyes began to water. Her ragged breathing was the only sound that filled the room, and I didn't know how to react. I had never seen her like that before. Panicked, sad, hurt-
"Maya please just-"
"No, you don't have the right. What you think I didn't notice your little act? Well guess what Riley I've known you for eight years now. I know you're not some loopy rainbow, but I went along with it because I knew that's what you wanted."
I stared at her shocked as her tempered rant went on, by that time the tears were streaming down her cheeks and there was no stopping her words.
"I knew you hated your eccentric style, your naïve stance on life, hell I'm surprised you kept up this appearance for so long,"
"You knew?"
"Of course why wouldn't I, I looked up to you. I even wanted to be you at one point, but then you just stopped caring about everything."
"What does that mean?"
She then let out a bitter laugh before gesturing to me. "I mean this, your character why did you make her? What was the point, what- you wanted to fix every one?"
"Yes actual-"
"Bullshit!" she stared at me incredulously before shaking her head, "Riley take a good look at the person you're trying to convince here. It's me Maya. The same Maya that protected you from bullies, the same Maya you taught how to draw," she slowly took a few steps toward me to close the gap she created earlier. "The same Maya you confided in at that dumb bay window. That's the Maya you're lying to right now. Not the one you created in your head."
I blinked back the tears that threatened to escape, and looked anywhere but her face. "All that doesn't even matter right now, I just came to make sure you weren't wrapped up in anything stupid."
She sighed, but didn't budge from where she was standing, "Riley you didn't come here to fix me, and you came here because you're broken."
_#_
"I hate my clothes, my hair, and the way you expect me to think and act. You guys I'm not what you want,"
Dad furrowed his eyebrows as he tried to understand what I said.
"You guys need to understand that I've been lying about being - happy,"