AN Hey Guys! Thanks to those who reviewed last chapter. It was very sweet of you. If there is anything bothering you in the story don't forget to let me know (no pm I still have problems and my recent move is certainly not helping lol). Anyway here is chapter 11. There is a lot of Naley angst but don't lose hope guys….what you are all wishing for is closer then you think. Anyway please please...pretty please don't forget to review.
Take care xoxo.
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Chapter 11: Underneath this smile
It was Monday and Haley was trying to avoid Nathan as much as she could. She was so embarrassed about what happened with him on Saturday. She basically threw herself to him, but what was worse is that he rejected her.
Geez…He'll sleep with anyone who wears a skirt but not me? She thought blushing with shame.
It was lunchtime and she here she was sitting alone outside freezing but it was better to catch pneumonia then have to face Nathan.
Aren't you pathetic? She thought with a sarcastic laugh. You'll be able to face him again in a couple of days; I'm lucky humiliation doesn't kill. She added to herself sitting at a picnic table while drawing little circles on the table with her pointer finger while thinking of ways to avoid him for a little longer.
Nathan was looking for Haley everywhere. He really wanted to talk to her and set things right about what happened at the party. He could tell she was avoiding him and he didn't want that. He couldn't bare the idea of Haley avoiding him.
Damn it! Where's she hiding? He thought slightly annoyed while scanning the cafeteria.
He finally decided to give up and skip classes this afternoon to clear his head. As soon as he arrived outside the school he stopped frozen. Haley was there sitting alone at a table. Nathan smiled, "Finally!" He said out loud rushing to her.
When he reached her he could see she was reading a book while listening to music.
He sat in front of her and Haley looked up and saw him before looking back down and pretending to go back to her reading.
Shit! What were the odds? Thought Haley trying to hide her discomfort. God must really hate me! She added to herself. A part of her wanted to run away, but she didn't want to show him how she was feeling. Another part of her wanted to hurt him as much as he had hurt her.
Nathan sighed frustrated when he saw Haley was ignoring him. I knew I should've been expecting this! He thought angrily. For once he wanted to do the right thing and the only thing he succeeded to do was drive Haley away.
We need to talk! He thought taking her headphones off.
"Hey! Do you mind?" Said Haley with clear annoyance.
"We need to talk about Saturday night…" Said Nathan simply. "It's almost impossible to see you and when I do you're not alone." He added calmly.
Haley rolled her eyes. "Honestly Nate, There's not much to say." She said trying to sound detached. "I was way too drunk, it was the first time, and I can assure you the last, I was drinking and I don't know what got into me." She said locking her eyes with his. Please… make it sound real. "I actually thank you for stopping me…I would've regretted it for the rest of my life." She added looking behind Nathan. Brooke was supposed to meet her any minute now and she'd hope that Lucas would be with her. Haley didn't know how long she could keep up the act for. Please Brooke… She begged in her mind.
"Yeah…." Said Nathan really hurt by Haley's comment. It was alcohol and only the alcohol that made her act that way. "But I didn't reject you because you were…"
"Brooke's coming…" Said Haley standing up and waving to Brooke. "Lucas is with her…" She added sitting back down with a relieved smile on her face.
Nathan shook his head and sighed irritated. "We'll have this chat one day or another…" He told Haley.
"There's no point to this chat Nathan." Said Haley with a fake smiled. "I thanked you already for stopping me from doing one of the biggest mistake's of my life. I don't see what there is to add."
Brooke sat beside Haley and Lucas beside Nathan. They chatted about the lunch they had on Sunday and how Lucas still felt high about the car Dan gave him. Peyton joined them a bit later.
They were about to make there way back into the school when Haley heard a voice.
"Isn't that Haley James the rock star?" Asked a masculine voice behind them.
Haley smiled as her eyes lit up turning around and squealing. "Chris!" She shouted running to him and jumping in his arms.
I was the one that lit her eyes…not so long ago. Thought Nathan jealously.
"What… What are you doing here? " Asked Haley ignoring the others. "Geez…. I thought you were in New York!" She added putting her hand on his arm.
"I missed you too…" Said Chris with a smile.
"Of course I missed you," Said Haley hugging him again. "You know I did."
Chris kissed her forehead tenderly.
Back off moron!! Thought Nathan reddening with anger as his hands started to shake by his side.
"Breath Scott…you're about to explode!" Whispered Brooke in his ear as he looked at her angrily.
"Well…I didn't want to tell you too much before it was official, but I'm doing the first part of the Wreckers and well we' re playing at TRIC on Wednesday." Said Chris laughing at seeing the joy spread on Haley's face.
"You did it!" Asked Haley with disbelief jumping in his arms again. "I knew you would! You're so gifted."
"So are you…" Said Chris nicely. "I impressed them with the song you wrote for me." He added tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear.
Lucas sighed with annoyance, while looking at his watch.
"Don't you want to introduce us to your friend?" Asked Lucas clearly annoyed with the situation and with sarcasm.
"Oh yeah sorry…" Said Haley blushing turning around and finally facing her friends. "So I think you know this is Chris," she said putting an arm around his waist and resting the other one on his chest. "Chris this is…"
"Let me guess…" He said nicely cutting her off. "Haley talked so much about you guys I'm sure I know you. So…" He walked to the table. "You're cute with a great smile…you're Brooke!" He said raising an eyebrow.
"Yep…nice to meet you;" Said Broke with a bright smile.
"You…with the « I-want-to kill-you » look," said Chris with a laugh to Lucas' attention. "You're prolly the crazy over protective twin brother Lucas." Added Chris wanting to shake his hand.
"My mom knows you're here?" Asked Lucas ignoring the outstreched hand.
Chris gave a quick look to Haley to tell her not to mettle. "Yeah she does, but she wanted to surprise Haley." Replied Chris a bit harsher then before.
Peyton shook her head. "Don't take him into consideration he's all PMS…Nice to meet you" she said giving him her hand. "I'm…"
"Peyton." Said Chris proudly. "Haley did mention your fantastic curly blond hair." He added shaking her hand. He finally concentrated his attention on Nathan for a while and looked back at Haley. "However…I don't know who you are…" he said somehow uncomfortably.
Nathan stood up and walked to Chris in a sort of defiance. "I'm Nathan, Nathan Scott." Said Nathan locking his eyes with his.
Chris grimaced and shrugged. "Yeah… I don't know who you are, sorry you're probably new in the group." He added nonchalantly.
Brooke burst into laugher. "I love you Chris!" She said laughing…"You're here for about 10 minutes and you already burnt Scott! You're good."
Chris looked at Haley who was doing her best to contain her laugher, but her laughed passed when she saw the anger mixed with pain in Nathan's eyes. I didn't want him to be hurt she thought sadly. "He's Lucas's best friend…" she simply said looking down.
"Anyways…I think it's time to go," Peyton told Lucas and Brooke. She could feel the tension and wanted to get out of there as fast as she could.
They stood up and looked at Nathan in order for him to give to get up and let Chris and Haley have some time together.
Nathan didn't want to leave them alone; just thinking about Haley and Chris making out made his stomach tighten and feel physically sick. But he had to go and he knew that... Nothing can be shown...keep it unspoken or Lucas will kill you for falling for his sister.
Once they were out of earshot Haley gently slapped Chris's arm.
"Come on Chris!" She said not really angry. "What'd you do that for? You knew perfectly well who Nathan is!"
"I do…" He said with a slight shrug. "But I wanted to wipe the cocky smirk from his face." He added with his own cocky smile. "Anyways you better go to class or you're going to be late," said Chris looking at his watch. "But I'll see you tonight. Your mother invited me to dinner at the café with you because your brother is already going somewhere."
"Yeah…. lucky then… we'll have a quiet evening " she said shaking her head. "It's not you…" she said uncomfortably. "It's just…it's just that he sees me as a baby still." She added nicely.
"I'll survive it…" Said Chris with a wink. "I'll see you later angel." He added quickly kissing her cheek before leaving her.
The next day:
Haley was wiping the counter at the café, she had a free afternoon but she was supposed to go back to school later in order to give an extra tutoring session to Nathan.
She sighed loudly, she really wanted to refuse, but he almost begged her. Since when does he care so much about Spanish huh? Thought Haley shaking her head in wonder.
"What's bothering your pretty head rock star?" Asked Chris with a big smile sitting at the counter.
"Not much..." she said putting her elbow on the counter while cupping her face with her right hand. "And please don't call me Rock star…. I'm not one..." She added simply.
"I know! And you're not even trying to be one." Said Chris seriously now."What happened to all the promises you made me huh? You haven't even sang once in public since you've been back Haley," Added Chris disappointment showing in his voice.
"It's just…I don't…It's…." Haley sighed with frustration. "It's complicated!" She said starting to wipe the counter again.
"Right…" Said Chris with a small laugh. "It's always complicated and you know that." He added looking down. "It's easier to find reasons not to try…it's easier than to try and possibly fail." He added looking up and locking eyes with hers.
"I….Geez you're right!" She said finally giving up. "I'll take the next opportunity I swear." She said sincerely.
"I'm glad you said that cuz just before our concert, your mother organized an hour of open mic…" Said Chris his eyes lit up excitedly. "I gave her the idea and she loved it!"
"Oh you didn't!" Said Haley red with embarrassment. He got me! She thought.
"I so did!!" Said Chris nodding "…and I expect you to go on stage and sing."
"I…I'm not ready Chris!" She said widening her eyes. "I don't even have a song and…and I need at least a week to be ready for the show. It… I… I can't have a song ready for tomorrow." She added shaking her head vigorously.
"You will." Said Chris calmly. "I'll help you. Grab your guitar and let's go to my motel. We'll work all evening and I promise you'll be ready by tomorrow."
"I…" Haley sighed. She knew she had to try once. She did it in London. She needed to face her dreams and to stand up for them. "I was supposed to…." She could see disappointment reappearing in Chris's eyes. She was scared to open herself up in front of everybody. When she was singing she showed a part of her soul and she was scared to let her guard down and show her true self in front of Nathan. Chris is doing that for you by helping you reach your dreams. Live your dreams. She told herself. "You know what…I'm in!" She said with a big smile taking her mobile out.
Chris clapped his hands on the counter excitedly. "That's what I'm talking about!" He said with happiness standing up. "That's the total rock star attitude."
Haley shrugged before punching some numbers. "Hey, I'm sorry I… I won't be able to make it today my… my mum asked me to do something for her." Said Haley on the phone trying to sound sincere. "Yeah… okay… I'll see you tomorrow bye." She added biting her bottom lip.
Chris kept looking at her but didn't say anything.
She took her jacket and walked outside the café with Chris.
"I thought there was nothing going on between Nathan and you." He said simply once they were on the sidewalk.
"What? There isn't!" Said Haley looking at Chris surprised.
"Why'd you lie to him then? It was him on the phone right?" Asked Chris stopping to talk.
Haley turned around to face Chris. "Yeah it was him." She said knowing it would be stupid to lie. "I don't know why I lied really…It's just…It's just I didn't want to create more drama and discomfort then there already is between us." She said nicely. "And well…something happened last weekend..." She added blushing. "Nobody knows it, not even Brooke and…I'll tell you when we reach the room."
Chris put his arm around her neck as they started to walk again. "Oh you're blushing!" He said bursting into laugher. "You got me hooked now rock star! I hope it's dirty!" He added kissing the side of her head making her laugh too.
They didn't notice the person looking at them from a green mustang. Nathan was there parked in front of the café, his phone still clutched in his hand. He just parked the car in front of the café to pick up Haley for their tutoring session when she phoned him to cancel.
You lied to me! He thought when he saw her leave with Chris. He felt his heart hurt when he saw him laugh and kiss her and then walk off laughing together. Something for your mother…right! You're lying and we can't say your guilt is overwhelming!! He added to himself with anger and disappointment. Well…we'll see about that he added starting his car with the idea to follow them.
Once they made it to the hotel room Haley didn't even get the chance to sit on the bed before Chris sat beside her with a wide grin on his face.
"So naughty girl…" Said Chris winking. "What happened with Scott last Friday?" He asked curiously.
Haley laughed and slapped Chris's arm. "Please don't make me more uncomfortable then I already am." She sighed. "I drank a bit too much and well… I made a pass on him." She added looking down as her cheeks burned in embarrassment. "I wanted to go all the way with him but…but he stopped me." She added with shame and sadness. "He's a manwhore, but he's not attracted to me!" She added with a sob.
Chris looked at her for a couple of seconds and wrapped his arms around her waist. "I don't believe that Haley." He said nicely. "I saw his face when I was with you at School… he was defiantly jealous!!"
Haley looked up and locked her eyes with Chris's. "Yeah?" She asked hopefully.
"Of course…" Said Chris nicely bringing his hand to her face and softly drying her tears. "Plus I can't imagine a guy not wanting to sleep with you!" He said honestly.
"Well…you don't!" Said Haley with a smile.
"Sorry… I should have specified straight!" Said Chris rolling his eyes. "I can promise you rock star…I'd have tried anything to get in your pants if I were straight!" He added arching his eyebrows seductively.
Haley burst into laugher. "I'll take that as a compliment…coming from you."
"It is!!" Said Chris laughing too. "But…but why did you hide that from Brooke." He asked serious again. "You told me she's your best friend and that you had trouble hiding from her that I was gay."
"It's just…It's just I'm not ready to admit that I'm not over him, that I never was and probably never will be." She said sadly. "I just want my heart to stop aching and the only way for it to stop aching is to forget Nathan. He's not right for me. I'm trying to convince myself and seeing the sadness and compassion in Brookie's eyes won't help me…." Said Haley sincerely. "A part of me is convinced that if I can lie enough to myself and to the rest of the world this ache will just fade away."
"Forget? You kept talking about him in London!" Said Chris surprised. "You kept saying that even if you were half way across the globe from him you could still feel him." Chris said putting his hand on top of hers. "What changed? Why are you saying he's not right for you?" Asked Chris nicely.
"I…" Haley sighed loudly and laid on the bed. "It's like everytime I get close to him something happens…Bevin, alcohol, Dan…Maybe…maybe we're not supposed to happen." She said her voice full of emotion.
Chris laid beside her. "Do you love him? He asked simply.
"What?" Asked Haley turning her head to face him shocked.
"Answer the question Haley…. Do you love him?" Chris repeated.
Haley closed her eyes. Facing the truth was hurting her even more. "Of course I do… More then I'm ready to admit." she whispered.
"Do you know how rare love is?" Asked Chris emotionally. "You can't just turn away because you have to face some bumps…at the end only love matters. Love…Love is worth any sacrifice." Added Chris lost in his thoughts.
Haley raised her head and frowned. She put a hand on Chris' chest. "Tell me what's hurting in there?" She asked nicely.
"Too much…" He said. "But that's the burden of musicians right?" He added with a sarcastic laugh. "I'm a tortured soul."
Haley kept looking into his eyes, trying to find a reason for her friends' pain.
Nathan finally made it to Chris's room. The motel rooms were behind the parking lot and it took some good bribes to find his room number. Damn Keller! He thought angrily trying to sneak a peek if the room by the widow. There was a spot where the curtain weren't touching and a sliver of the room could be seen. Nathan kneeled and looked inside. He had a prefect view of the bed where both Haley and Chris were laying. I can't believe she's doing that! Thought Nathan with jealousy and pain. He then saw Haley raising her head and closing the distance with Chris's, she put her hand on his chest. "That's it!" Said Nathan loudly standing up and began banging on the door as hard as he could.
Both Haley and Chris jumped off the bed surprised.
"What the Hell is that?" Asked Haley worried while standing beside Chris.
"It's prolly the room service for the food I ordered remember?" Said Chris with a smile. Once he opened the door he just had time to see Nathan standing there before feeling a great shooting pain in his face. He punched me! Thought Chris in disbelief falling on the floor.
"Are you insane?" Shouted Haley angrily running to kneel beside Chris.
"Probably…" Said Nathan coldly. He grabbed Haley's arm strongly. "We're going!" He added clenching his jaw.
"Ouch stop Nathan!" Shouted Haley while he pulled her to the door. "You're hurting me!" She added with pain in her eyes as they filled up with tears.
"Not as much as you are hurting me!" He said forcing her into the corridor. He tightened his grip on her arm.
"You're hurting me Nathan please…stop…" she pleaded her voice full of pain. She felt like he was going to crunch her arm.
As soon as Nathan heard her begging he turned around and saw the pain in her eyes. He immediately let go. I didn't mean to hurt you… He thought with sadness not willing to show her.
"What's wrong with you?" Asked Haley aggressively rubbing her arm.
"What's wrong with me? I can ask you the same thing!" He said standing straight and crossing his arms on his chest. "Are you really jumping in bed with everybody? Geez…." He said shaking his head. "Lucas is going to be happy to hear about that!"
"Lucas? You wouldn't dare!" Said Haley furiously. "This has nothing to do with you!" She added turning around to go back in the room.
"You're not going anywhere," said Nathan putting an arm on her shoulder, forcing her to face him.
"You were supposed to be MINE!" He shouted to her, his face only inches away from hers. "You were supposed to love ME! To want ME!" He added pointing to himself. "And only one year away changed all that? You're just a coward!"
"What?" Asked Haley even angrier. "This is an ego issue? Come on!" She said punching his chest. "I was in love with you for so long and I let you go and you can't deal with it! You 're so damaged!"! She added with fury in her eyes. He's not jealous, he doesn't care really…He just liked to be adulated by you! She thought.
"Takes one to know one baby." Said Nathan keeping his eyes on her. "It's not that you don't love me anymore the problem Haley... I don't care about your love!" Such a lie! He thought before continuing. "It's what you are becoming! That's the problem! You're making out with Jagielski one day, trying to sleep with me another and jump into bed with another guy another day? You changed and clearly not for the better."
"What are you saying?" Asked Haley with defiance in her eyes.
"You're a whore Haley!" Shouted Nathan. "You're even worse then Rachel because at least she's open about it but you're not!" He added heatedly. "You're playing the naïve little girl, but in fact you are way worse then she is!" He saw Chris coming their way. "Hey guy just so you know… Your girl is a whore!" He shouted to Chris. "She tried to sleep with me last weekend but I turned her down!" He added coldly looking at Haley again.
Haley stood straight and put her hands on her hips. "Chris knows about it!" She said too happy to crush Nathan and seeing surprise in his eyes was priceless. It was like the cherry on a sundae. "And if I'm a whore you shouldn't have turned me down last weekend." She added with a smile. "We all know that whore's your type!"
"I didn't know then!" He said colder then before if it was possible. He put both hands on her shoulders and tried to kiss her, but Haley succeeded to free one of her arms and slapped him. The sound echoing in the hallway.
"Why don't you try to spit in my mouth next time it would be sexier!" She said doing her best to contain her tears.
"Tell him..." said Chris behind her. He didn't want to come too close and get punched again. Luckily enough his nose wasn't broken and he couldn't afford a broken nose with the concert tomorrow.
"I won't…. We're done…everything that needed to be said has been said…" Said Haley shaking her head defeated. She locked eyes with Nathan's. "You won...We're strangers now."
Nathan was surprised not to hear anger in her voice anymore, but only sadness. He frowned.
"I guess now we know every persons true color right?" She asked looking at Chris before walking back slowly to the room.
"You shouldn't have done that…you ruined everything…. you should have known her heart better then that." Whispered Chris with sadness in his eyes.
Nathan stood in the corridor shocked. He didn't expect Chris to tell him that. What the hell just happened? He thought confused.
Next chapter: Some are falling in love, some are falling apart but at the end….only love matters.