A.N: Hey guys!

See I keep my words and I update on time. I Will try to write as much as I can but I have just been promoted which mean work will get way more challenging and tiring. But you guys are so awesome that I'll do everything I can I promise.

Well don't forget to review you know how much I love reading you.

Take care

Steffy

Chapter 17:

When I woke in the morning I decided to check my e-mail before going to meet Lissa. I knew that what I was doing only delayed the inevitable, but I needed the extra minutes.

The first email was from my mother telling me that her Lord's business was taking a lot longer than expected and that she probably wouldn't be able to come see me before I left for New York. She told me that she would visit me there though.

I also received an email from Eddie who actually enjoyed his assignment a lot more than expected, and that being away from everything for a while in this new environment and solitude was exactly what he needed without even realizing it.

I started to ponder if solitude was actually not a solution for me too.

When I reached for my cup of coffee I knocked the box containing the bracelet Victor gave me off my desk. I looked at it on the floor for a little while, I sighed bending down to pick it up and without even thinking about it I locked it around my wrist.

It would help to remind me why I was doing everything, why Lisa needed her spot on the council whatever the consequences.

When I made it to Lissa's room, I barely knocked when she opened the door. I could feel curiosity mixed with apprehension in her.

"Hey I was wondering if you would show up," she said after giving me a quick hug.

"Why is that?" I asked walking in the living room looking around in the hope of finding Christian. If Lissa got mad I knew Christian might understand me, he might help her see things clearer, but he was nowhere to be found.

"I might not be able to read you as well as you read me Rose, but I know you and you seem pretty reluctant on telling me something...like if you were forced into talking to me."

I looked at her silently forgetting how she knew me so well sometimes.

I took a deep breath and sat heavily on the sofa. "What if I told you we may have a solution to contravene the Quorum Law?"

She nodded sitting beside me. "Yes, we have been discussing it with Christian and honestly Rose even if we intend to get married in the future it would be bad to do that now and try to have a child so young just in order to get a spot on the Council you know?"

I looked at her with my best 'what-the-fuck' face, I didn't even consider that. Weddings and babies? Really not on my list.

Lissa blushed slightly probably not expecting that reaction. "I-"

I shook my head. "No, Lissa it has nothing to do with babies and weddings and stuff."

I saw her face lighten up and a huge wave of hope hit me hard. "You found a weak point to the law? A way to get me on the Council anyways?"

I looked at her hating to be crushing her hopes. I did find a way to get her on the Council, but it was at the price of her memories, her memories of a happy family.

"I-yes, I did find a way to get you on the Council but-"

"But what?" She asked, her level of excitement increasing by the minute.

"But I'm not sure you are going to be happy with me." I admitted and I was pretty sure that was the understatement of the millennium.

"I'm listening."

"No interrupting?" I tried not sure I would be able to keep going if she were to talk.

"Promise," she said gently wrapping her hands on her lap.

I told her everything starting with the first trip to Vegas and the comment on Eric Dragomir enjoying Vegas dancers, than I went on about the note the Queen gave Ambrose for me. I told her about the file on her father that had been stolen from the alchemist. I continued by telling her about my research, my meeting with Victor, the Jane doe account and the bank manager. I finished by telling her about going to meet Jill and her mom and that Emily confirmed my doubts.

"So all that to tell you that Jill is your sister and that…you are not the last Dragomir anymore. Once we can officially prove the family relationship, you will be able to get your spot on the Council." I finished breathless.

Lissa was staring at me like she was frozen on the spot. I tried to get a 'feel,' but either she was blocking me or she was in shock either way one or the other it didn't look good for me.

"Liss?" I tried. I reached for her arm and as soon as my hand touched her she jerked away and the wave of fury and pain took my breath away.

"I want you to go Rose," she said standing straight, arms crossed on her chest. Her face was hard, her jaw locked, I never saw her look like that before.

I felt all the blood drain from my face, I was probably as white as a Moroi. Her reaction seemed worse than what I initially thought.

"Lissa I-" I started, getting up reaching for her again.

She took a step back. "I said get out Rose." She almost growled.

"I had to Lissa, I-"

"You had to NOTHING!" She shouted. "You-It is my life, my family!" She continued her face so red I was almost scared she would have a stroke. "It has nothing to do with you! It never had anything to do with you, but of course you had to mettle! That's what you do! You don't mind destroying peoples lives as long as it meets your end! You are no better than Victor!" She added and it had the effect of a knife being stabbed straight into my chest.

"Lissa don't please-"I said as tears started to fill my eyes. What hurt the most was that she meant it, I could feel it.

"It was my choice! You should have given it to me. You had no right to put dirt on my dad. You know how much I venerated the man! You know how proud I was of my parents love and-" she had a tearless sob. "You took that away from me without a second thought! Did you even consider for a minute what I might think? Did you really think that I would have traded the memories of a perfectly happy and loving family for a spot on the Council? If you think I did, it means you don't know me at all! But you knew I wouldn't have done it…YOU JUST DIDN'T CARE!"

I just stared at her silently knowing that nothing that would exit my mouth would make her feel any better.

She was breathless now, but the intensity of her furor didn't decrease at all. She pointed at the door. "I'd like you to leave now and don't bother coming back. You and I were never friends," she added so coolly that I couldn't contain my tears any longer. "I want you GONE."

"Lissa I'm sorry let me explain why I did it, you need-"

"Goodbye Rose, Have a good life in New York." She said throwing me a last look before walking in her bedroom closing the door behind her.

I couldn't believe how bad the things were. I'd just lost my best friend. I could feel it, she wanted me gone. I tried to get in her head, but she was blocking me…was our bond broken?

I rushed out of her room and ran down the stairs. I couldn't contain my tears anymore and let them run freely. I was about to exit the building when I changed my mind, I didn't want everybody to see my distress so instead of going out, I entered an empty banquet room, sat in a corner my forehead on my knees letting all the tears I had been holding, run their course.

I heard a shuffling sound as someone sat beside me, but I didn't need to move to know who it was, the musky odor was enough.

"You know, you are around me a lot for someone who wants closure," I said in between sobs. I hated for anyone to see me weak but Dimitri already saw my weak side.

"I saw you walk in, I wanted to make sure you were okay." He said gently.

"Why would I be okay? I haven't been okay for so long I'm not sure I remember what it feels like," I took a deep shaky breath. "Oh by the way you can give me a big fat 'I-told-you-so' because, as you so smartly figured out I did lose my best friend."

"I didn't want to be right."

I finally turned my head. "Of course you did. You love being right that's your whole Zen crap thing."

"No Rose, I did not want to be right, do you really think I enjoy seeing you hurt?"

I sighed, "you really don't want me to answer that."

He groaned.

I shook my head and stood up drying my tears roughly with the back of my hand. "There is no point, you don't want to be there, you don't want to help me out. You feel like you have to."

"Rose come on stop!" He said reaching for my arm before I could go.

He froze on the spot tightening his hold around my wrist.

I turned around and found him staring at his hand around my wrist and I could see some of the charms, I completely forgot I was wearing the bracelet.

"Dimitri -" I started, wanting to tell him about the bracelet when he pulled me toward him resting both hands on my shoulders.

"I love you Roza, I always have and probably always will, but sometimes I hate myself for that weakness. It's the only thing that still keep me human, but-those memories…"

He pulled me even closer and started to kiss me hungrily and it felt good. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him even closer it was so nice to be so close to him, but it didn't feel real. I kept my arms around his neck, but removed the charm bracelet from my wrist and threw it away.

Dimitri's lips froze on mine a microsecond, but he tightened his hold around my waist and kissed me as strongly yet this time it was full of despair too.

I started to let go of my hold around his neck, this kiss tasted a lot like goodbye, it felt wrong….empty somehow and it tore me up. It was like I just couldn't hold on to make it all okay.

I brought my hands on his chest and pushed him away gently.

He looked at me with confusion.

"We…we can't do that," I said wiping my bottom lip with my thumb pad.

"Because of Ivashkov?"

I couldn't believe that Adrian hadn't even crossed my mind. It was just that I just realized that as much as I loved Dimitri it didn't feel the same anymore….We couldn't play on broken strings they say.

"We could make it work, maybe give it another try," he added bringing me back to reality.

"I love you Dimitri…I really do."

He smiled. "I know."

"But we cannot be together. Not anymore:. I reached for his arm. "It hurts too much, we can't make it all okay. The truth hurts me right now, but I cannot give it a try anymore I just realized that I loved you a little less than before and it makes the difference."

"Are you mad?"

"No I'm not mad, I'm just different."

"So love does fade," he whispered looking down. "I never believed it would happen."

"Neither did I…especially not ours. But," I shook my head. "I just cannot convince myself anymore. Lying would be worse…" Tears started to fall again. "But god knows how much I still love you."

He hugged me, burying his face in my hair. "I know, it's not your fault. It's just the way things go. You can't force it, sometimes things are just broken beyond repair and love is just not enough." He kissed the top of my head. "Things changed, you changed, even I changed."

"I…have to go," I said backing up to the door trying to hold his eyes full of sadness.

As soon as I was out of the building I rushed into the woods and started to walk around to clear my mind. Dimitri was finally giving in, kissing me and it didn't feel like it was supposed to. It wasn't right, it didn't feel like our kisses used to feel like and it hurt more than I thought it would. I really had lost everything now.

I walked for a couple of hours before I was satisfied enough with my level of exhaustion to go to my quarters.

As soon as I entered in my bedroom I heard a clicking sound behind me that made me stop immediately. I might not have experienced it personally, but I'd seen enough movies to recognize the sound of a gun being loaded and ready to shoot.

I raised my hands and started to turn slowly. I might not be human, but bullet wounds were as fatal for dhampirs than humans.

I could feel the cold sweat forming on my forehead and my breath caught in my throat when my eyes connected with the barrel of a gun.

Was it the end?