Thank you for your patience. I've been writing specs for other shows and left this for far too long. The trailer dropped today-woohoo!-and got me excited again. Especially seeing our lovelies together!

For those John/Helen fans-I am with you. I love them in the show too, but I also think Julianna/Smith have such fab chemistry and you know, maybe in another world where John is alone ;)

Enjoy!

oOoOo

Traveling back is easier for Juliana. She just has to picture life with John and Tom, and there she is immediately. Literally.

When Juliana reappears in her second world, she stands on the doorstep in front of the Smith home. She looks in the window and notices a light in the living room is still on. She wonders what John would still be doing up, then she realizes he only just dropped her off. She would have no way to explain how she got back here.

She quickly decides she does not care.

Juliana knocks lightly, not wanting to draw attention from Thomas if he is still awake.

She sees the tall, dark featured figure moving towards the door. John opens, baffled at her rather sudden presence.

"Hello." She doesn't know what else to say.

"Hi…" He looks at her, eyebrow perked a bit in amusement. "I'm happy to see you, but what on earth are you doing back here? Forget something?"

"Yes." And with the need and longing she summoned in her world, she leans forward and presses her lips firmly to his. This time, she does not pull away.

John is pleasantly surprised by her boldness and immediately wraps his arms around the small of her back, pulling her into himself. He has a million questions, but right now lacks the curiosity to ask them for fear of interrupting this moment of bliss.

She pulls back and smiles up at him, at her John. It has only been a few weeks, but he truly is dreadfully handsome, extremely intelligent, and in this world, a force of just compassion she feels completely safe with. For the first time since Trudy was shot, she feels safe.

John meets her gaze, noting how her eyes seem full of genuine adoration.

"What?" He asks almost meekly, feeling suddenly unsure of himself.

"Can I come in?"

He grins in response and pulls her into another kiss, this time in the house as they stumble far enough down the hall for him to close the door.

"Shh." She says almost laughing. "Don't wake Thomas."

"Oh shit, Tom…" He looks walks down the hall, glancing up the stairs. It's dark up there but he knows his son could be awake in his room.

"The office?" She suggests.

"The office." He beams at her and pulls her in again. His heart pounds in his chest and he wonders if she can hear it or feel it through her palm resting there.

Juliana leads them backwards into the room where she used to sleep. She still cannot believe how she ended up here of all places. She was looking for Thomas, looking for the boy who could perhaps restore his father to his own humanity and the dormant goodness within. As a bonus, she found this John, the one who became the caring father, the avid reader, the thoughtful teacher. She fell for him quickly, too quickly perhaps.

She reminds herself that mid makeout is probably not the best time to scold herself on her romantic choices. She wraps a hand around his neck as they collapse together onto the twin bed.

John looks down at her, smiling. "Have I mentioned how thankful I am that you twisted your ankle?"

"Yes, my clumsiness works wonders."

He leans down and pauses, lips almost touching. A million thoughts run through his head, a war between the unanswered questions and his unbridled desire. He wants to kick himself when he chooses the former.

"Why are you really here?" His emerald eyes search her sapphire, hoping beyond hope that all his instincts are wrong.

But he never felt quite right about her. She is kind and compassionate, but he always sensed something more.

She gulps and he sees something flash in her eyes and knows that this conversation has likely stopped whatever was just about to happen. He rolls to the side, resting on an elbow as he looks at her. She sits up, looking away for a moment, shoulders slowly slumping as she sighs.

It's time.

"I don't even know where to begin." She turns to face him. She wants to be honest, to tell him everything, but she isn't a fool. She knows how completely ridiculous everything will sound. And she knows she will have to be honest about what she was hoping to do with Thomas.

Thomas. The truth could break John's heart.

"If it's a long story, we have all night." He gives a small, encouraging smile hoping it is enough and praying it masks his anxiety.

"I don't want you to hate me." She offers truthfully and he can see in her eyes that his question has injured her.

"My dear," he lifts a hand to gently cup her face. "I could never hate you."

Juliana would laugh if it didn't hurt so much. She knows he can and probably does hate her in many other worlds under many different circumstances. But she gulps and presses on.

"You deserve the truth." She replies resolutely. "Just promise me you'll listen to all of it… You might hear things you don't understand or that are difficult, sound crazy even, but please… wait until the end to ask me questions. Promise?"

She stares at him intently, and he nods. "I promise."

She sighs, and begins to tell him the tale of her world, beginning with the bombing of Washington D.C., and the Allies losing the second world war. She talks briefly about growing up in San Francisco, about her family and then Trudy's death. She omits the parts about Frank and most of those about Joe and Liam. She focuses on her connection to John in her world, and on the Resistance she is helping lead.

As she talks, she notices John's myriad of expressions. Disappointment. Confusion. Dismay. Frustration. Disbelief.

She ends with a tear in her eye, believing she has lost him. "That John Smith shot me as I was starting to travel… and I ended up here, in a hospital." She takes a deep breath to finally answer his actual question-why she is really there.

"I looked for a world where Thomas is still alive… so that maybe I could teach him to travel, and he could tell his father, your doppelganger in my world, to be a better man… I wouldn't let him stay there, but he would need to be there, for a little while. Long enough to change our fate and save my world."

Juliana wipes her tears and looks at John, who is sitting up now, leaning against the wall. She is pretty sure anger now dominates his expression, although she is surprised to learn why.

"That's quite the tale." He gets off the bed and starts pacing.

"I'm so sorry, John. I know… it sounds ridiculous"

"No, not ridiculous, Juliana. It sounds copied." He storms over to his desk and grabs the manuscript of his novel.

"I mean, I knew you stayed here for a week, I just figured that if you read my book, you'd just talk to me about it." His eyes burn with betrayal.

"Your book?" Juliana is puzzled by the accusation. "I only read a few pages about a man at war…"

John thrusts the pages towards her. "A man at war, but the Allies lose! The Nazis bomb Washington D.C. and the take over most of America. Then there is the Resistance fighting back."

Juliana takes the book and flips further into it. She reads quickly as he paces.

"I didn't read this, John… I'm telling you the truth."

John charges towards her and grabs the manuscript. He flips to a page a few chapters in and thrusts it back towards her. "See, right there!"

Juliana skims a paragraph about an American soldier, she assumes a "fictional" version of John Smith, goes undercover as a Nazi spy in order to protect his family.

"John… this… how can this be?" Juliana looks up at him, unsure how he knows so much about her world. How can he have flashbacks? He's alive in that world. Are there more versions where the Nazis won than just her own? Abe suggested their world was the only one that was so far off, killing so many people that it became like a vacuum across the universe, picking up travellers.

John doesn't care to search her eyes for authenticity. He is too upset and would rather she just go.

"But why the multiple worlds? Why bring my son into it?" He finally stops, staring back at her.

Goosebumps form and the hairs on her neck stand on end as John's countenance is reminiscent of the vicious Reichsmarschall. He is furious and senses a threat to his kin, the alpha ready to fight off any adversary.

"John… How long have you been having these dreams or visions?"

John releases his clenched fists.

"How… I didn't say I was having dreams or visions."

Juliana stands to face him.

"John, please." She looks directly into his eyes. This is not that Smith. This is her John, the man she is falling in love with. She must reach him.

"I know they are, because I had them too, in my world." She cups his face, and for a moment he allows her to offer him comfort. But then he steps back suddenly, darkening his glare.

"How can this be real?" He raises his voice

"John, please-"

"No, Juliana. I can't keep talking about this. I... I need time. Just... go." His gravelly voice is a growl and Juliana's sadness begins to bubble up into the corners of her eyes as she rushes out of the office. John watches her go as his heart rests in his throat. He gulps and tosses the manuscript back on the desk.

He hears the front door slam shut.

She's gone.