Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, just playing in the sandbox.

AN: Bad week for me but here's a chapter for you :) enjoy! ~ Hannah

Chapter Forty-Nine – Turn of Events

Things changed. People changed. Lifestyles changed.

I was seeing the world through a new light and though I was unprepared for the changed around me, I took comfort in the fact that change was inevitable. I couldn't fight change. I couldn't sway change or control change. Change was good. Change was needed. This long road I was walking wasn't an easy one. It wasn't meant to be full of rainbows and happiness. There was a time for that, sure, but I wasn't ready for it yet. I had to travel the road, keep everything moving and fight the demons. Change, it was all about change.

Nothing got better from standing still. Nothing got better from staying trapped inside. How easy would it be to crawl into a hole and never return? Yet, that wasn't me. I was a fighter, I knew I was. Life wasn't supposed to be easy, it was supposed to challenge you, it was supposed to make you work for the things you wanted, it was supposed to define you.

I needed change, desperately…and I got it.

[x]

"Was that the doorbell?" asked Bella.

I shrugged in response.

"Were you expecting anyone?" asked Jasper.

"Not that I know of," replied Bella. "Do you think it's safe to answer?"

"I don't feel anything bad from whoever stands on the other side."

"Oh, for goodness sake!"

I got up with a huff, walking determinedly towards the front door.

"Wait, Ella, we don't know who it is."

"I don't anyone willing to do us harm would ring the doorbell."

"Hello, can I help you?" I asked while opening the door.

"Ella, hi."

"Lauren?"

"Yeah…sorry, is this a bad time?"

"No, urm, would you like to come in?"

"Sure."

I moved aside to let her and the large gift basket she was carrying in. My confusion at her arrival was helping to keep some of the more negative thoughts at bay. To my knowledge, I had never said a kind word to Lauren or her me. I could only guess as to why she was here now. I heard no malice or judgement in her voice. Jasper had said he felt no ill-will from her either.

"Lauren, what the hell are you doing here?!" demanded Bella.

"Please, I'm sorry, I come in peace."

"Bella, it's alright. I invited her in."

"You two hate each other."

"Never hated, just strong dislike," I said.

"I don't like this."

"Then leave Bella, no one is forcing you to stay."

I kept my gaze on Lauren for I did not want to see the secret eye exchange I knew was going on between Jasper and Bella behind my back. I offered a seat to Lauren and we sat in silence till Bella made her mind up to stay. I hoped she decided to stay silently.

"Why did you come Lauren?" I asked.

"I heard about what happened."

"So, you've come to get the gossip? Going to smear Ella's name around town?"

"Bella, shut up," I said, looking at her briefly before turning back to Lauren. "Ignore her but I am curious about why you are here."

"Look, I know we've said bad things to each other in the past. I was a horrible person to you and others, I'm jealous and protective by nature and I know that's something I need to work on. I just wanted to make sure you were alright and help you if I could."

"Why?"

She sighed, I didn't have to be a genius to know that whatever she was gearing up to tell me was personal and not something to be repeated.

"One of my cousins was kidnapped by a madman several years ago, they don't live in Forks, luckily they live in a big city where the gossip was minute. I know what it's like to help someone through that ordeal. I'm very close with my family, that cousin especially, I spend a lot of time helping her deal with that had happened and helping her though the trauma. I want to help you, if you'll let me."

I blanched at her words, first feeling guilt for her cousin and then awe that she wanted to help. My family and friends were great but how could I turn down the offer of someone who knew what I was feeling, what I was going through and how to help me?

"You'd really help me?"

"Of course, I know that must be hard to believe but no one should go through this process alone. I know you have a wonderful family and friends but you can never have enough support. I bet you're going mad in your head trying to get other to understand what you're feeling and how to act. You probably resent that they're making decisions for you and that your controls been taken, right?"

I nodded.

"My cousin went through the same thing. You're in a bad place right now, I can sense that and frankly who wouldn't? It's nothing to be ashamed of and you are certainly not weak. Your journey to recovery is yours and you should be allowed to do it your way and at your speed. If you don't want my help then I completely understand, but I needed to offer it, I wanted to."

"I'd like your help. The slate is clean between us."

"Ella, you can't trust her surely?"

"Bella, I am capable of making my own decisions. You're my sister and I love you dearly but this is my life. Lauren's right, this is my journey, my recovery. I'm sick of all the secret glances, the secret meetings and the way everyone is trying to control how I feel and what I do. The only other person who has helped me is Jasper. He noticed I was struggling when all you wanted to do was fix me. I AM BROKEN. You cannot fix me with glue or Sellotape. You have to let me take this journey myself."

"I thought we were helping."

"No."

"You better not hurt my sister or I'll make your life a living hell! If I find out this is just some ploy to humiliate her and gossip about her with Jessica behind her back, then I'll be coming for you. There will be nothing left of you when I'm finished," hissed Bella before she left the room, heading upstairs.

"I'm actually not friends with Jessica anymore."

"Why?" asked Jasper.

"I've done a lot of bad things in my life and believe it or not, I regret the way I've led my high school life. The past shapes us and sometimes it shapes us for the better and sometimes we act out. I of course am the latter but I'm hoping I can make amends for that. Jessica is a small-minded person, it was easy to be friends with her for she was jealous of the world like I was. Jessica intends to milk the gossip of your kidnapping to her advantage. She wants to humiliate you. She thinks your experiences will make the Cullen's drop you. She wants Edward, she's always wanted Edward. When I told Jessica, I wanted no part of her plan, she ended our friendship."

"You seemed so close."

"Sometimes it's easier when you fake things. I think I thought she was a friend in the beginning but she quickly showed her true colours."

"Why did you remain friends then?"

"The bitter and twisted world I'd created for myself was easier to endure when there was someone likeminded by my side."

"I'm sorry," I said.

"For what?"

"The pain in your life."

"Thank you but it's alright. I actually started seeing a counsellor this summer, it's been…enlightening."

"I'm glad to see there is a goodness in you Lauren," said Jasper.

"I am too," she replied while smiling.

There was a comfortable silence between the three of us then. I believed Lauren's words and knew that Jasper would have made an excuse for her to leave if her thought her intention were anything but honourable. It was not unusual for someone to do a complete 180 on their attitudes. A pleasant surprise. A change…

"What's in the gift basket?" I asked.

"Sorry, I completely forgot about that. I got it for you, obviously. I didn't know what you liked, so I just got a mixture of chocolate, DVDs and spa products. Oh, and a cuddly bear because everyone should have one."

"Thank you," I was moved by Lauren's gift. I always felt my emotions were close to the surface these days. Tears burned in the back of my eyes but I tried not to let them fall. Even now, I didn't want anyone to see me at my weakest.

I could feel a change coming. Just like when someone has a lightbulb moment, something clicked within me at the presence of Lauren. A determination perhaps or a feeling that things would get better.

Lauren stayed for a while, we just chatted, got to know the basics about each other to allow the friendship to grow. She left in the afternoon, after we'd exchanged numbers and promised to visit soon.

"I'm just a call away," she'd told me.

Yes, my world seemed lighter. A change for the better.

[x]

"Jasper, I want to have another session."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. I need this. Please. It will help."

"Do you remember what happened the last session?"

"Y-yes," I stuttered, hating the images that were conjured but knowing I had to endure them to get better.

"We don't have to do this now."

"Lauren's right, it's my journey. I want to do this Jasper. The true memories hurt, they bring pain and sickness but I need to know what happened to me. I need to know what he did to me and what he made me do. Otherwise I will never be able to escape him. I'll never be able to get better."

"Alright, but if I think you're in trouble, the session stops."

"Fine."

"Ok, lie down."

I did as instruct, listening to Jasper's calm voice lull me away and take me back in time.

"Ella, can you hear me?"

"Yes."

"Where are you?"

"In my safe place."

"Alright, I want you to come out of there. Let's go back. Remember, these events aren't your own, you're just telling a story. You're safe, nothing can harm you."

"I'm safe, I'm fine."

"Where's Marco?"

"He's here, he's next to me."

"What is he doing?"

"T-touching me, why is he touching me?"

"Relax Ella, it's not real. It's just a story, remember. You're safe, you're with Jasper, he's safe remember."

"Jasper? Jasper's my brother, he keeps me safe."

My heart swirled with emotion to hear he say that as I felt the same way about her.

"Marco can't hurt you remember, he can't touch you. What is he doing Ella? What is he telling you?"

"He wants me to break up with Edward. Says that Edward isn't real anyway. He'd be here if he was real, he'd want me if he was real. Without Edward, I'll be Marco's to control. Marco want's Edward dead. Marco wants the road cleared."

"Marco failed."

"Safe, safe, Edward's safe but I'm not."

"Why aren't you safe?"

"Marco keeps whispering in my ears. I can't get him out. He corners me at camp."

"What does he want?"

"He wants me to welcome him into my home. He wants more time with me…alone time. He wants to see where I live. He wants to meet my family, see whose standing in his way. He wants to break them and take me away."

Her breathing changed and I knew I had to bring her back down.

"Move away from that memory Ella, you're back at camp now. What's happening? What can you see at camp?"

"Sophie is acting weird. She was such a quiet girl but now she has all these personalities. It's like someone has hypnotised her. Marco said this was her true purpose in life. That she was meant to be this way."

"You disagree?"

"Sophie was kind, he made her bitchy."

"When did he tell you this?"

"He's always trying to talk to me. He uses Sophie to get me alone. We hide in corridors or hidden alcoves. I always try to get away quickly but he has such a tight grip on me."

"What does he tell you?"

"He's angry. He says I'm not succumbing quick enough. He says he wants all of me but he's impatient at waiting. He wants into my home but I keep rejecting him. If he continues he might break me so, he switches methods. He's angry, very angry."

"What method did he switch too?"

"'My mind is too active,' he says. I'm not so easy to control as others and it frustrates him. He injects me."

"Injects you with what?"

"Lust. His lust. Traps me within my mind. I scream to get out but it is difficult. He doses me regularly but it doesn't have the effect he wanted. It messes with my mind. I am not compatible with what he wants to do. I work differently. The fog descends on my mind and Marco loses control over his anger. He calls me such vicious names but I can do nothing to stop him, nothing to get myself out of the situation. I'm trapped. He is so angry at what is happening but he is also so happy for even though it is not going his way, I am trapped and he wanted me trapped. He wants me alone. Afraid. He wants me vulnerable. He needs me to break so bad."

"Why?"

"So, he can take me. If I'm broken I won't fight. It'll be easy for him then. I'll have nothing tying me down to this place. I'll go willingly and he can fill my head with anything he's ever wanted."

"Ok Ella, that's enough for today, I want you to concentrate on your breathing."

"Don't let him take me Jazz," she whispered.

If my heart was beating it would have broken stopped then and there.

"Nothing will happen Ella, I'll keep you safe, I promise."

Her breathing calmed.

"Alright, on the count of three I want you to slowly come out of your mind. You will feel relaxed and well rested. The memories will come back to you slowly over the course of the day. Ready Ella? Three, two one, awake."

"Hi Jasper," she said.

"Feeling alright?"

She nodded, "was it a good session."

"Informative. Don't worry Ella, we'll work through this."

"I'm scared I'll wake up one day and won't know who I am anymore."

"You ever feel like that, you just come to me. I'll set you on the straight, alright?"

"Ok Jazz."