Chapter 44

Memories of the past resurfaced against her will. Unpleasant, repressed memories, which she'd tried to run from, tried to hide, and tried to lock away... they all came back in full force.

The Arl of Denerim's estate was familiar to her. Intimately so. It was easy, therefore, to convince the others to let her take the lead. She'd been confident that she could lead them around the estate no problem. She just didn't think it'd be as overwhelming as it was.

As they were freeing the prisoners from the dungeons, Leliana was constantly assailed by memories of when she herself was held there. Not all that long ago, either. But she also remembered freeing the residents back then, too. In particular, an elven woman who'd told her that she would teach her daughter about humans like her. That had always stuck with her, a ray of sunshine in an otherwise dark time in her life.

Riordan, the Warden whom Howe had captured, was getting ready to leave. He was conversing with Aedan and Alistair in hushed tones, dressed in the uniform of the now deceased guard who'd been guarding his cell. He had agreed to lead the prisoners to freedom. Zevran was helping some of them to water, among who was an elven man who'd been plucked from his wedding ceremony. The son of the previous Arl, Vaughan, had been the one to imprison him, along with his bride and cousin. He did not know what became of them.

Leliana hugged herself as she stared at the rack, remembering times when she herself had been stretched on it. They had done a lot of things to her. Unpleasant, despicable things. She shouldn't have been shocked to see that the dungeons hadn't changed, that it was still a place of suffering and death. It reinforced the thought that some things just don't change, no matter how much she wanted them to.

She stiffened when she felt a hand on her shoulder, her breath left her, and she had to stop herself from reacting violently. Being present in the shadow of trauma and abuse made her jittery, made old instincts rear their head in an effort to protect herself.

Grab wrist, twist, trip, throw, mount, stab.

She visualised it like it was the most obvious thing, and it pleased her to know that she still had it.

"Are you okay?" came Alistair's voice, cutting through the haze and forcing her to focus. "You've been zoning out."

Leliana looked at him over her shoulder, completely horrified. It was a fluke that she hadn't acted on instinct. If she had...

"Yes," she said automatically. "I am fine, Alistair."

If his frown was any indication, he was hardly convinced; and so she smiled at him, hoping it would provide some reassurance. Alistair didn't press the matter, however, and flicked his thumb over his shoulder at Riordan.

"He says that Howe's down there in the lower depths of the dungeon," Alistair told her. "That's where we'll find him and his mage buddy. We take care of that, and the magic barrier outside Anora's room collapses. Then we can get out of here." He shook his head. "I'd rather not hang around any longer than I have to."

"Agreed." I'd rather not, either. "Are we ready to go?"

"Yeah, Riordan's just about to leave, and that'll be that."

"Did you give him the documents we found in the Warden vault?"

Alistair nodded. "Thank the Maker for your bard training, Leli. Warden secrets are now where they belong."

Leliana was silent a while. Then she smiled tightly.

"Yes," she muttered. "Thank the Maker for my bard training."

That's not who you should be thanking, Alistair. And I doubt she requires thanks at all.

"Good thing is that Oswyn and Irminric, after they've been to a physician, can turn the opinions of their families against Loghain at the Landsmeet," Alistair went on. "That's two Banns who'll support us, hopefully."

"Alistair, Irminric doesn't even know that his cell door is open. He doesn't want to escape."

"It's just lyrium withdrawal. He'll be fine." Alistair stared at the man kneeling in his cell, rocking as he prayed for the visions to go away. "We're not leaving him behind."

That could've been Alistair's fate had he joined the Templars. No wonder he wants to help.

"Of course," she replied. "Nobody's staying back here."

After bidding farewell to Riordan, who took all those willing and able to escape with him, Leliana led the party down into the last level of the dungeons, where her own cell had been at one time. As she descended, she felt dread coalesce in her stomach, knotting up and rolling around like waves crashing mercilessly against rocks, eroding her courage little by little. She gulped as she stood outside the door leading to where Howe was, and looked around.

Aedan didn't even look at her. He was staring at the door, the corners of his lips curled into a smirk. Zevran winked at her, and Alistair nodded, smiling.

"I'm with you," he whispered, and she nodded and pushed open the door.

And found Howe and a small retinue of soldiers waiting for them.

"Mage," Aedan said as soon as the door was open. Leliana loosed an arrow immediately, skewering the mage's throat.

Arrows never killed instantaneously, and the mage gurgled blood, his hands flying to where the shaft stuck out of his neck. He couldn't talk, and his hands were occupied, meaning he was completely unable to cast any spells, leaving Leliana enough time to put the second arrow through his eye.

As the mage fell, Howe clicked his tongue.

"Unfortunate," he commented laconically before looking Aedan up and down. "But I'd expect nothing less from Bryce Cousland's pup."

"Alistair. Leliana. Zevran." Aedan's voice was calm and clear. "The mage is down. The barrier is down. Get to Anora. Now."

Leliana stared at him.

"And what, leave you to have a reunion? I don't think so," Alistair protested.

"Alistair," Aedan said as he removed his helmet and his gauntlets. "Go. Now."

"But-"

"Let me have this. I'll be with you soon."

Zevran tugged at Alistair's elbow. "Trust the man, friend Alistair. Rescuing the Queen is the primary objective."

"But to leave him all alone against four people-"

"Alistair." Aedan unclasped the vambraces and let them fall from his forearms. "Let me have this."

"Are you sure?" Leliana asked him.

"Yes," Aedan replied. "Now go."

He had something that was fuelling his confidence, and it was not reckless rage. He was much too composed for that. Leliana nodded.

"Alistair, we're going."

With both herself and Zevran against him, Alistair sighed frustratedly and agreed.

"You better be back," he told Aedan as they parted.

The man only nodded as he undid the clasps of his cuirass and kicked the door closed.

Maker watch over us all.

A/N: Next chapter will be from Aedan's POV.