Moving sucks. Everything about the process is painful, annoying, and time consuming. The only reason I even moved in the first place is because I simply couldn't afford to stay in the place I rented. The landlord raised the rent again in November and there was no way I could pay it off.

During the break, I moved to these apartments where rent is actually fairly cheap, only about 350 jellybeans a month. A far cry better than the 800 that the previous landlord wanted from me. As much as I may have appreciated her for letting me stay, I think she ended up putting too much focus on trying to get more jellybeans out of me.

I still wish I had considered more options before deciding to pack up, though. This place may be easy to make payments for, but there are an awful lot of toons here that also go to the same school as me. Under normal circumstances, that might not be so bad, but with my situation, there isn't a place I could have ended up that could possibly be worse for me than here. Simply put, everyone hates me. Nobody wants me within ten feet of them, and even attempting to talk to anyone simply makes them scream and shout out of pure fear. It's something I wouldn't wish on anyone.

As if the message wasn't already clear, I was told to come back to the office as soon as I had gotten done setting boxes down in my new apartment. There were apparently several requests for me to sign a contract that bound me to refrain from having any contact with anyone who lives here. Basically a restraining order but without the chaos of the courts.

With that on top of all of the nonsense that I had to deal with over the break, there is not even an ounce of motivation in me to continue unpacking. The only things I even bothered to set up when I got here a few days ago were as follows: bed, desk, printer, clock, and computer. Everything else is still sitting in their boxes, waiting to be put into the light. They're likely all going to be waiting for quite some time, but this is fine. None of those items have particular importance to me.

At the moment, I'm laying down on my bed, staring at the ceiling, and wondering what tomorrow will bring. It's still the same school that I used to go to, so I won't have to worry about getting used to an entirely new facility. However, what I will have to worry about, almost certainly, is who my teachers are going to be, and how the workload is going to look. Knowing the general pattern, this semester is just going to stress me out more than the last semester, which already stressed me beyond all of the year before that. It's a vicious downhill spiral, and I'm just blindly falling down, the end nowhere to be seen.

There may be a lot of uncertainties about what goes on during the school day, but the biggest deal for me is actually quite a bit before I step foot in that door: the bus stop. So many people from my school are living here at the moment, and it's uncertain to what lengths they'll be willing to go to keep me as far away from them as possible.

The funny thing is that I have no wish to hurt any of them. They all think I'm out looking for blood, but the truth is that I even hate the thought of hurting others. Despite this, the lack of trust that they have for me also goes the other way. When I was new to even the school district, they quickly shut down any reason for me to trust them. Since then, no effort has been made, by any toon, to regain my trust. For this reason, I much prefer to be left alone.

Although that situation might be the biggest unknown for me, it's not my biggest worry. I have no idea who is going to be in my classes, and I definitely don't know everyone who is going to ride this new bus. There is a lingering thought in the back of my mind that someone that I absolutely despise could be scheduled to ride the same bus. If that ends up being the case, I don't know how I'm going to end up handling it.

Regardless, I try to sleep. Whatever I say or think about the hand life has dealt me, the situation still remains the same. They're all meaningless, and I'm just along for the ride at this point.

…

I open my eyes and I look over to my desk. The clock reads just a little after 4AM. It's far too early to be up. Why are you like this? I thought to myself. It's very typical for me to wake up much earlier than I really should when I'm stressed, particularly about school. It happened more times last semester than I could keep track of, it was almost every other day. As is the norm when this happens, it's impossible for me to get back to sleep. I decide to force myself to sit up and find the light switch.

The bright yellow flash blinds my eyes for a second or two before they finally get adjusted. Then I am able to see the unpainted walls that are behind the bed and the desk, surrounding the window, and blocking most of the way to the living room. At this point, there is no going back; I must stay awake. I've still got a good two hours before I have to be leaving for the bus stop, so I wonder what I could do for that time to keep myself occupied. I figure I could at least start setting up some of the things that I still have packed away. As early as it might be, it might be a great time to at least set something up.

I stepped foot in the living room and remembered just how many boxes I had lying around. There's unopened cardboard boxes everywhere and every single one of them is filled to the very top with things that I decided to bring. Half of them probably don't serve me any purpose anymore, but regardless, they're here with me. "No, thank you," I said aloud to myself as I walked back into my room and lied down between the covers again, moving the blanket up to meet my chin. Perhaps trying to sleep for another hour or so wouldn't be so bad…

But the light is still shining in my face. I can't successfully try to sleep with the lights on, but I also really don't want to leave the bed. It's very warm and comfortable here, much more so than standing on the floor.

"I've got all this time and nothing to do with it," I murmured hopelessly. The bus won't get here for another two hours, which is going to feel like two days with how much I'm dreading its arrival. There's no chance anything can possibly go my way this year. I've grown to accept this fact as I went through high school. I've run out of any hope I could have ever had for anything working out to help my case because nothing ever changes. Everyone still hates me at the end of every day and nobody will ever dare try to see who I really am.

…

The next thing I know, I'm opening my eyes and looking at the clock. 6:20AM. I nearly overslept for the first day. I quickly got up and got changed before I went to my computer and pulled up a document that I print out every semester to give to my teachers. It's a list of requests and promises that I make to ensure to the teachers that I have no ill intentions. I print out four copies of the document and sign them at the bottom:

1. I have no intent to hurt any student or faculty member at this school.

2. I focus better and don't get angry as easily if I sit alone during class.

3. If I do end up snapping at someone, then they instigated something with me and I got tired of putting up with it. I will make any effort possible to warn you if there is someone I am likely to snap at.

4. I will prefer to not talk at all during class, even to answer or ask questions. This may change in the event that somehow, someone trusts me enough to talk to me and they earn my trust.

5. I am very open to talk about anything at lunch or between classes if needed. I generally don't eat much.

6. If you hear someone saying something bad about me, please hear my side of the story.

7. I want this semester/year to be a good one, but I have not an ounce of confidence left in that wish. Please help me get that back if you can.

Dottie Dandyhoffer

This probably won't make much of a difference in the long run, but maybe there's a chance that the teachers will be slightly more willing to listen to me if I give them that.

I end up locking the door behind me with just enough time to get down to the bus stop. I do have to admit that the weather isn't that bad today. There's a few clouds in the sky, but it feels quite warmer than it has been the last week or so. I didn't end up needing my jacket but I decide that I'll wear it anyway. It's still a bit chilly outside, so there's at least some point to it. After all, it's far from being summer weather.

I finally see the group of toons sitting at the corner of the curb. I slowly approach them, nervous to know what will happen, but a dog turns around to stop me. "Stand back!" he screams at me while I was still easily twenty feet away from the rest of the group. Because I have no wish to fight, I listen, and stop right where I am, which causes him to turn back around. The rest of the crowd kept talking to him for a bit, presumably thanking him as well.

Although being screamed at certainly doesn't go well with me, I certainly can't complain about being separated from everyone else. Nobody will bother me while I stand here; I get more time to myself.

As the school bus turns the corner to meet us, a light breeze blows against the left side of my face. I also take notice of the sun, which is barely visible through the branches of the leave-less trees in the distance. Sometimes I wish I could take the sun and drag it to the other side of the sky. It'd be nighttime. I wouldn't have to deal with school. I'd have all the time in the world to just be in my own world. I'd be… calm…

My thoughts were interrupted by the cacophony of the school bus brakes, letting me know that it was time for the day to begin. Unfortunately, I have no such power to control time, so I begrudgingly enter the school bus. Of course, I enter much later than everyone else because nobody wants me anywhere near them.

As I walk to the back of the bus, I notice that the rest of the toons completely left the back two rows of seats empty. It's hard to say if this is intentional, but regardless, I take the very back seat and sit down on the right side when facing the windshield. I soon lay down, knowing that I'll have to go through the entire trip alone. I'm honestly not even sure how long this ride is, but knowing my luck, it's probably damn near an hour.

The bus slowly backs up and makes its way out of the apartments. The day is finally beginning, and all I long for is the moment that I can return back home where I can be left alone in peace. "Well, here goes nothing," I say to myself so that only I can hear my voice.

I'm ready for nothing.