...And/or tries to protect you.
This probably takes place about a week after the war starts, so Jackie is still 14
I stared out the window, as I had been doing for a few days now.
As far as I knew the war was in full swing, or just getting started, I wasn't sure. I had been reflecting though, going to the Pole, Antarctica and the Warren, all while seeing exactly how the Descendants of Pitch treated their enemies en mass.
And I was scared.
I wasn't going to admit it, according to everyone else I'd just come back from a long weekend trip not feeling so great.
Well, there was some truth to that, but still.
What was happening, just thinking about it made fear roll in my gut. I had been told that Descendants tended to try to not kill each other, but I still couldn't get the image of every Descendant I knew lying dead and bleeding on the ground. That image came from a few nightmares that I'd had.
I'd also been ignoring all calls, Jamie had of course wanted to know what happened but I couldn't say it. He might be jealous, I wasn't sure, but that wasn't the biggest reason.
I wasn't sure if he should know. He wasn't a Descendant, he just knew the Guardians, really he shouldn't be in the know about this, right?
I couldn't really ask, but there was one other issue. I had been targeted before, what if I was again? I don't know how this worked, what if he got hurt because of me?
This is partly what I'd spent those few days thinking about, but I wasn't sure how to approach it, should I call him about this? Was this something you'd do over the phone? No idea.
It was starting to get warmer as well, if I was going to do this then I needed to be in sound mind, not cranky or tired.
"Jackie?" my mom knocked on the door.
"Yes?"
I heard the door open behind me, but I kept staring out the window, which overlooked the woods. You couldn't see the lake because of the tree cover, which was why I practised there.
"Jamie's at the door. Have you been ignoring him since you got back?" Mom asked disapprovingly, reminding me almost painfully of Tina, to the point where I was completely unprepared for it. There was a sudden flare of guilt and I felt my fists clench for just a second.
Sudden bursts of emotion had also been happening more often, sometimes taking me completely off guard.
I shoved it down so I could answer the question.
"I just miss his calls." I lied.
"And you don't think to ring him back?" Mom and Tina had clearly been talking a lot more, they were starting to sound like each other.
"I'm out of minutes."
"I don't believe that for a second." Mom quickly debunked. "You barely use your cell phone for its intended purpose. Or at all, for that matter."
"I had a small plan, is that hard to believe that I ran out?"
"Yes."
Mom then sighed.
"Come on, just talk to him. Only you know what's going on in your head, and Jamie seems to be the only one who can drag it out of you."
"Blunt I see."
"I have to be with you." Mom said dryly. There were days when I didn't have to wonder where my sense of humour came from. "Come on, he's downstairs, your dad's entertaining him."
I nodded, swivelled my desk chair 180 degrees, got up and followed mom out of the room. We went down the stairs and to the left were the lounge was. I could hear dad wildly telling a story, which sounded similar to the ones he used to make up for Danny and I before we went to sleep.
"I've dragged her out." Mom called in.
"Kicking and screaming?" dad asked, and I could hear Jamie snort with laughter.
"You wish." I said, stepping and leaning against the wall.
"There you are! Why haven't you been answering my calls?" Jamie demanded, and I found that every answer I had dried up. I had prepared so many lies, each one ready to draw upon, but I just couldn't say anything of them.
"Erm, because..." for crying out loud, I could even try what I'd already told mom, but even that wouldn't form.
"Let's leave them to it." Mom had to drag dad out, and left the two of us to it.
"... I've just been thinking."
"About what? C'mon I wanna know where you've been!" Jamie clamoured.
"A lot, of, stuff."
I moved away from the door and sat on the couch.
"Well, what kinda stuff?" Jamie sat down next to me, a little too close for comfort.
"Things have gone, pretty, bad."
"How?" he asked earnestly, his big brown eyes looking up and I was at the point where I could tell he would want to help, which didn't help me.
"There's a war, and I don't know what's going to happen, and..."
"And...?"
Every line of thought failed to get out of my mouth. I knew my logic was sound, there were Descendants of Pitch who knew where I was, I knew I was at risk, and I knew that Jamie would try to intervene, and I didn't know what would happen from there.
"You see, I'm worried, about, you." I said slowly.
"Why me?"
"Because, you know me, and, stuff could happen."
Jamie was silent, he probably could see where this was going.
"I mean..." I struggled to explain myself. "The Descendants of Pitch know me, and you, you being around me..." I couldn't say it properly, couldn't bring myself to explain myself in full, the words just weren't there. It felt like my throat was closing up.
"So, maybe, we should stop being friends." I finished, giving up.
"No! C'mon!" Jamie cried. "Why? Just...!"
"I'm sorry." I was surprised how much this was hurting. There was a pain in my chest that I couldn't put my finger on.
I stood up and walked a few steps, folding my arms and not looking at Jamie. "I'm sorry, but I don't know what might happen. I don't want you to get hurt."
Jamie was silent and I wasn't going to turn around to see. With the sudden bursts of emotion I was getting lately I didn't know how I was going to react.
Not looking behind me turned out to be my downfall.
Something short and uncomfortably warm wrapped itself around my waist and I was left stunned.
"Don't worry about me. Descendants don't get non Descendants involved, right? I'll be fine."
"We don't know..."
"You don't know. Besides, Jack would be really mad if they did anything to me!"
"Friends in high places." I muttered.
"I said it before, and I'll say it again. You're my friend, I don't want you to go." his voice was cracking a bit.
My eyes were burning and I could feel small lumps of ice forming underneath my eyes. I hadn't felt that way for... a few months really, but it was different this time. I didn't feel sad, I didn't know what I felt.
"Thank you." my voice was also cracking a bit.
Wait, he's hugging me, should I hug him back? That's what people do right?
I awkwardly shifted around in his grip and wrapped my arms around Jamie's shoulders.
"So, don't you worry about me." Jamie said, voice not much better than mine. "You'll be fine, I'll be fine. Just don't do that again."
"Got it."