CHAPTER ELEVEN

I woke up still in his arms. He was whispering comforting words to me, but the memories assaulted me so quickly that nothing could've made the experience better. It was as if the image of him was trying to tear me apart.

Everything that he had done to me… Everything that I had done to myself… It was no wonder my broken mind was trying to protect me from this. I was an absolute mess. Why had I done all that – for someone who couldn't even love me for me?

"It's going to be alright… It's going to be alright…" Now, the man who wore the face of the one I hated was rocking me in his arms. What had my existence come to?

I nodded, mutedly. "If you're really Edward, then why are you being so kind to me? Is this some sort of game? I don't want to play anymore. I've had enough of it when I was alive. I don't want to deal with it when I'm dead, too."

"You… remind me of my late wife," he mumbled. His hand stilled and he pressed me against his chest. It was strangely silent, bringing reality quickly crashing down on me.

I was really dead. Wasn't this what I always wanted? Hadn't I hurt everyone around me just to get here? No, not here. I was hoping for some sort of relief, not an extension of the life I had. Sure, I wasn't expecting pearly gates for myself, but this was a far cry to what I hoped death to be.

"And how did your wife die?" I quietly asked him, knowing that I was going to be a sore topic. When I received my role, I had Luke do a bit of research for me. They had never mentioned the wife or the son's name. The scenes that Sidney had produced were merely of the viewer's pleasure. No one knew what happened to the other two people after Edward Mott was murdered.

He let out a shaky sigh. "They – someone, I don't know who… They took them both from the house and expected money for her return. I gathered everything I had. Money I could always make more, but there was only one of her and there was only one of Michael.

"I loved them so much. I know what they say about me now – that I was a nervous mess and I took a black slave as a lover. I know they thought I was crazy. I knew they thought I was useless. I didn't care about all that as long as I had her…"

His body shook as he began to sob. His tears disappeared into my hair.

"You don't have to continue if it upsets you." I wrapped my arms around her. 'I know it still hurts you. I can see it. You don't have to defend your love for her to me."

"They b-brought them back to me, but I should've been smarter. I should've tried to s-secure their good health because… When they arrived, my son was already dying and my p-poor wife wasn't looking too good herself. Michael died several days later. I couldn't handle it. I couldn't stay in that room or with company who shared my won grief. I needed to vent off elsewhere. I never… I never thought she'd take her own life! I should've been there for her instead of being a selfish bastard! I might as well have killed her myself! I left her to suffer on her own after losing Michael and being mistreated by the kidnappers… She never told me what they did to her, but I suspected. I had seen the markings on her body. I had seen her sudden aversion to men. I had been the only one she drew near and I left her like a coward!" He pulled at the white wig in pain, but didn't take it off.

I didn't know how to console him. I had been on the opposite end of the abusive relationship. I had been the one betrayed and it had torn me apart. Being dead had really put things into perspective and placed my anger where it belonged.

Looking back now, I wondered why I ever thought he was the Holy Grail. He was nothing but an abusive asshole who used my emotions against me.

"And how do I know you're not the same coward you were before?" I suddenly hissed, drawing away from him. "She was in love with you. She gave you a son! And when things got rough, you went and fucked off out of there!"

"Madi…" He extended a hand towards me, but I slapped it away. "I'm trying to make things right! I'm trying! I don't' know what else to do! I don't know what else to do! I can't move on because my every thought is on her. I loved her so much and… Madi, she looked just like you."

"So you're using me to ease your own guilt?" I shook my head, stepping away until I was at the door. "No, I'm not going to let that happen, again. You can go fu – "

I let out a startled cry when a hand clamped down on my shoulder, turning me around.

Two women with old, dirty nurse clothing grinned back at me. "Look at the little baby! She's so confused," one of them snickered.

"It was definitely a good idea to bring her over. She's going to be fun to play with!" the second one added.

I shook them off. I could feel the panic rising. My heart no longer raced in my chest, but all the emotions I had felt before were like muscle memory. They grabbed at me like greedy hands.

"Stay away from her!" Edward roared, pushing them from me. "You don't touch her, you hear me? She is mine!"

The nurses sneered at him. "That's no fun!" they cried.

Id didn't know what to think. They had brought me over. They killed me. It made sense. They knew their medicine and they must've spiked my pills or replaced them.

A small laugh left my lips, drawing the attention of all who were present.

"She's already lost it!" the left one giggled.

"That didn't take long!" the right one rolled her eyes.

No, that wasn't it. I wasn't going crazy. I just found it laughable that out of everything that happened, Sidney had been right about the spirits. Where was he, now, missing all the action?

"I'm out of here. Lover boy is spoiling the fun!"

And then, they were both gone and I was alone with him, again.

I sighed, dropping on to the bed where my corpse was still laying peacefully on the mattress. I didn't look dead. I actually look quite nice, considering the amount of weight I had lost after the break up with Rory. I had gained some back during my memory lapse. My cheeks weren't hollow and colourless. Well… that wasn't' true. The natural flush I had before I died was quickly fading away. With each passing minute, I was looking more and more dead.

"You're still beautiful," I heard him murmur, trying to comfort my silent insecurities.

What was I going to do, now? I didn't want to deal with him. Not only was he a stranger, he also wore his face. How was I going to bear staying here? Maybe I could just follow Luke around. He didn't have to know.

"Where are you going?" he asked as I started for the door, again.

"None of your business," I mumbled.

I made my way down the stairs. I saw several pairs of eyes on me, spirits who had been here for a while, but I ignored them all. I just wanted something safe – someone I knew and trusted, so I found Luke and just stayed close to him.

It was depressing that he couldn't see me. He was eating and laughing, completely oblivious that we were never going to be able to be together anymore.

I stretched out my hands, wanting to touch him, but my fingers went right through his body as if he wasn't there, at all. It was as if I wasn't there, at all. "Luke…" I tried calling out to him. I tried throwing things, but I couldn't even shove over an empty can. I even tried sitting in his lap, hoping that he could feel something was amiss, but it was futile.

If I couldn't interact with anything, then how did they switch out my meds? There had to be a way, but no one was willing to help me. The other spirits merely watched and laughed at my poor attempts.

"What am I going to do?" I moaned in defeat.

As I stewed, I could hear the other spirits begin to murmur. It was a wave that grew louder and louder.

"Look at that one there!" one exclaimed. "Looks just like that gay retard!"

I knew they were referring to Rory, but did they have to be so crude? Clearly, they did not evolve with time. Their mentality was stills tuck in the Dark Ages!

"Miranda's going to want her hands on him."

I bit my lips. Even though I hated him, it didn't mean that I wanted him dead. I hated this house already and I had only been here for a few hours. No one should be subjected to this. That meant I had to warn him somehow, but no one wanted to interact with me.

I heard how they described me: a ditzy basket case who only got the job by fucking my way up. I already knew that I wasn't going to make any friends here.

"Madi…" Edward came down looking like a sad puppy. His begging eyes made me feel guilty for treating him so poorly. To be honest, he had been nothing but kind to me and his transgressions occurred centuries ago to someone else I never even knew. Who was I to judge and condemn him?

I swallowed my pride and walked over to the sheepish man, aware that eyes were glued to us. "Edward, I'm sorry about earlier. I didn't mean to just lose it on you like that. I – "

"It's okay," he reassured me. "I know it's a lot to take in. Being dead isn't exactly a trivial ordeal."

He slowly, testingly, walked over and embraced me. I felt myself relax in his arms. Everything was so cold on this side of the world, but somehow, this was enough. Even with the lack of warmth from both of our bodies, I could still imagine it through his actions.

"Edward, the others… I think someone wants to kill R-Rory next." I hated how I stuttered over his name. "I know there's a way to make contact with the living and make things move, but I don't know how. Can you help me?"

He nodded. "Of course. You're still new to this, but maybe I can give you enough power to at least project yourself for a short time."

I smiled gratefully at him. Yes, perhaps I had been too quick to judge. "Thank you, Edward."

He looked me in the eyes as he took my hand as if giving me time to slap it away again, but I allowed his fingers to intertwine with mine as he led me back upstairs.

We were going to have to practice in private. It was no good revealing ourselves too early in front of a large group. The last thing we wanted was mass hysteria.

After returning back into the bedroom, he told me to close my eyes and imagine, really imagine what it was like to be alive, again. It was a strange request. I remembered exactly what it felt like to be alive and it wasn't much different from how I felt now. The biggest difference was the memories.

Maybe if I concentrated on that?

No, that didn't work. The memories only made me angry and upset.

"You've already taken it for granted," he told me. "You're dead and that is the new normal state. You'll have to force yourself to form a corporeal body."

I frowned at him. That wasn't what I thought at all. "But it already feels like my body is solid. I mean… I can feel myself and I can feel you."

He took a step back, but I tightened my grip on his hand to keep him from letting go. A jolt of fear seized me. I was afraid of being alone. What if this was all a figment of my own imagination and I was actually trapped in this house by myself?

"Madi…" he sighed, reaching back out to me and pulling me against his chest. Just the contact was enough. "I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. I promise. You can do this. Is there something you really want to say to Luke?"

Of course there was… I had a lot of things I wanted to say to him, but no time in the world could've expressed it all.

"Just imagine how much you want to talk to him. How much you need to talk to him."

It was difficult trying to do what he was telling me to do. I threw my face into my hands and let out a cry of frustration. "I can't do it! Please, warn Luke and Rory for me." Even though I hadn't heard anything about the malicious spirits wanting to off Luke, I would much rather he left before it was even a thought.

Edward looked away. "I've already tied appearing in front of Rory once before. I think I may have caused him to think he was losing his mind."

I blinked before bursting out laughing. If only I had the chance to see that. I would've loved to witness him becoming unhinged. Karma had to get him at one point, but… not in the form of death. However, this made me only want to scare him personally even more.

Unfortunately, as Edward and I planned, the door opened and I was jolted out of my thoughts, frightened as if I had been caught doing something I wasn't supposed to, but the person couldn't see me.

Luke walked in. I could tell he was buzzed by the way he fumbled with the light switch. He kicked his shoes off and gently slipped into bed.

I could feel the dread starting to fill me. This was what I never wanted to happen and I never thought that I would have to see it firsthand.

By now, my body had long since lost all its warmth. I could see how stiff it had gotten and he was definitely going to notice, even when his senses were slightly diminished.

"I'm sorry, Luke," I whispered, tears falling anew from my eyes. "I wish I could've been stronger for you. I tried. I really did." But I was weak and it had all gone to shit. It didn't even matter if I actually tried to kill myself this time or not because I had already attempted it many times before. I knew how much I hurt him.

Edward pulled me against him and I allowed him to comfort me. "I can't promise that it'll get better, but eventually, you'll become more desensitized to it."

"To become less human…" I quietly retorted.

He kissed the top of my head. "However you'd like to word it," he indulged me.

I closed my eyes when I heard Luke speak. I couldn't do this. It was too painful, but I forced my eyes opened again when I heard my name.

"Madison?" Luke mumbled in confusion. "Madison, what…" He touched my face as if I had suddenly become a stranger. 'Wake up. What's wrong with you? Wake up!"

His shaky fingers felt for a pulse on my neck, but there would be none. "No…" he moaned with dread. "No. No! I told you not to come here! I knew it was a bad idea! Why didn't I try harder? He… I knew he was going to be the one to kill you!"

I wanted so desperate to tell him that it hadn't been Rory's fault this time, but I knew it would be of no use. There was absolutely nothing I could do to ease his pain. I knew this was just the icing on top of the cake. Losing my memory had given him hope. Hell, it had given me hope. I had truly been happy with him because I no longer had Rory plaguing every second of my life. If only I had met him first. Perhaps then, I wouldn't have ended up where I was, now.

"Can we go, now?" I whispered, feeling my dead heart crack.

Edward squeezed my shoulder. "Of course. I'll try to talk to him later for you."

We hid in the kitchen where most of the living was still congregated, completely oblivious to the horrors of the house. At least here, the vibe was happy, but I couldn't become complacent when the spirits were plotting.

"You can do this, Madi. I believe in you." Edward tried to cheer me up, but what was the point? I was dead and trying to warn my cheating boyfriend that ghosts wanted him dead to join them so that they could jump his ghostly body.

The moment Rory broke away from the group, we followed him up the stairs and through the hall to the room he shared with Audrey.

He let out a sigh, stretching his limbs. That was when I drew whatever determination I had to talk to him. For a moment, I thought it worked. His eyes narrowed as he squinted in my direction before rubbing them tiredly.

"I need to sleep…" he mumbled to himself. "I'm starting to see things…"

With a huff, I tried again, but this time, I also drew from my anger and hatred. "Rory Monahan!" I shouted.

He jumped, staring straight at me with wide eyes. "M-Madi?!"

AUTHOR'S NOTE

Number one rule: Everyone lies.

Thank you Mystery Angle, Brookie Twiling, Applejax XD, guests (Guest, anonymouscsifan, Guest) for reviewing!

Guest: Hehe… There will be lots of Madi and Edward interactions!

Mystery Angle: Another weeeeeek of pondering for youuu?

anonymouscsifan: I saw that it was a season finale… I'm still a bit too nervous to continue watching… I think I'll binge tomorrow and hope for the best. Eek!

Brookie Twiling: Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh… Rory had a Freudian slip? Yeah… Let's just say that… *cough*

Regarding Murder House… It's hard for me to say, buuuuuut… Let's go with no because for the most part, this is a standalone story. I won't force any of my readers to read anything they don't want. There is a bigger plot that I'm incorporating into all my stories, which may require reading all of them, but it is unnecessary to – hopefully – enjoy each story on its own.

Yup! Madi died… Completely not in the outline, but the story always seem to get away from me and yes! Good guess! Madi got her memories back after dying. But umm… I'll just say that Audrey may be guilty for a lot of things, but not for Madi's death.

Applejax XD: Yay! I hope this chapter was satisfactory!

Guest: Thank you! If you've ever read any of my other AHS stories, maybe you'll be able to answer the questions you're seeking. Hehe… Otherwise, read on! The answer may be revealed in the road ahead!

Thank you as well to everyone who has favourited and followed this story.

Please, leave a review if you enjoyed this!